throwaway_sjfgd

5 ms·

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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
I do not think that's so trivial or 'binary' like it is often stated. Someone had asked a related question on the same OP thread: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=29240007 My response is here: https:&#
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
> I am not sure I agree with 3. Overall medicine is a very recent development. I am not sure what are the circumstances that would have enabled us to develop science and medicine significantly earlier. I'm not suggesting that had
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
Adding to what bradlys has written. If we can fix the system, then no 'hopelessness' may anymore be involved. That's what we need to push for. As of now, the system for broken marriages is hopelessly bad. My advice to all w
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
My situation has many similarities. I fully agree with your viewpoint.
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
To start with, I'll reiterate that I am not qualified enough here, and you seem to know more than me. :) Since you asked still, below is my current understanding: 1. Biological evolution itself depends on spreading of genes. So the b
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
Thanks! I am not qualified enough to know a good answer either. Albeit I have alternative thoughts for some points you have made, you seem to know this better than I do.
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
I overall agree to what you have said. Marriage has positive impacts on children, and that's why love itself evolved. However, "marriage" as it stands today from a social and legal standpoints comes with a lots of side thin
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
> men are financially better after divorce women worst. Does that take into account how much work both are putting in towards earning? Or it's just considering the net numbers? Women may be worse financially looking at just the
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
Would I be correct in guessing that you have not faced such a situation yourself? My motivation for asking -- What you wrote is advice inexperienced people commonly give. It's nothing that those facing the challenge would not already
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
Upvoting everything you have said. Feeling sorry for you too.
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
I'm adding to what bradlys has written in response. Women, marriage, love are different things. We should not let these be confused together. A push back against marriage is not same as that against love, and nor against women in gen
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
Agreed. A question I have is if the STD issue mentioned still valid, as a motivation for monogamy?
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
Upvoted. Writing this here as I would give the same advice.
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
I am not sure if I have understood the question. I cannot disclose the detailed specifics of my case.
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
I had found some good ones in a local library and had read them there itself while taking off from work without telling my spouse. There was no opportunity for me take these home for reading and nor create any electronic record. Life was
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
> ... as victims when everyone around them knew it was a disaster from the beginning. I just don't understand how they get there unless they willingly ignore signs of bad behavior It may also be the other way around where they s
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
Per what I know and have read: The emotional aspects of love last about seven years. After that, pragmatics and mutual understanding need to take over. We have invented the notion of marriage and seem to have overturned what nature may ha
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
Continuing in a separate comment: Advise for you and others: * Use social and legal provisions towards your own favor as much as possible whatever those are -- live-in relationships, friends with benefits, getting to know each other well up
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
I am (trying) doing that all along, and there is no other option anyway. So the question you have is not really applicable. Notes on why one can't just 'not care' for mental health: * Prior to separation, it could not be ign
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by throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
I am going through it right now too. Very short background: * Wife abusive from the beginning * Sexless marriage as she refused * Beating herself up for years * She's not earning (highly qualified) * Did not take care of child or hom
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by throwaway_sjfgd 6y ago
Thanks a lot for the helping hand!
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by throwaway_sjfgd 6y ago
Thanks. I'll look at these.
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by throwaway_sjfgd 6y ago
Thanks for the help and advice even if it's just reconfirming the understanding. There's more to it indeed as you guessed.
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by throwaway_sjfgd 6y ago
I'm looking for advice. I have been suffering for the last several years. The root cause of the problem is still there and cannot realistically go away easily [1]. I'm consulting with psychologists and was taking medicine (held