jm__87

23 ms·

151.
by jm__87 8y ago
This reads like someone who works only with junior devs or not very good devs. I work on a team of senior devs who are very good and if there is ever an issue where it could be attributable to one or more people, those people will argue abo
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by jm__87 8y ago
Perhaps it is just an oversight? Science fiction writers aren't perfect.
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by jm__87 8y ago
Learn to meditate and make a commitment to stop avoiding flying if you actually need to fly somewhere. Avoidance just feeds the anxiety. Try to remind yourself of the positives of flying - you can travel far distances in a short period of t
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by jm__87 8y ago
Can't it be both? It's pretty obvious that a rising minimum wage would increase McDonalds costs. As min wage rises, at some point, assuming the average customer is indifferent to how their order is taken, it will make sense to hav
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by jm__87 8y ago
Yeah I'm with you. Suffering on its own is pointless. Learning how to live with pain can bring some interesting insights in to life I think, but it's obviously better to just never have to learn this in the first place.
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by jm__87 8y ago
As I do not have autism, I cannot relate to your viewpoint. It is possible that psychology is not going to help you - but it did help me and has helped many people, so I wouldn't be so dismissive of it. My advice for you after days of
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by jm__87 8y ago
I think what it comes down to is self compassion - you have to care about yourself, especially if you believe no one else does. This is something that doesn't just happen. You have to practice self compassion and do things for yourself
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by jm__87 8y ago
Okay. What were you doing CBT for?
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by jm__87 8y ago
Sigh, well if you really want to be depressed, I suppose it's a free country. Speaking as someone who used to be depressed, all that depressive realism stuff is total BS. When you completely filter out all the positive aspects of every
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by jm__87 8y ago
Then what do you do when your parents die? And someone else is supposed to take care of your parents while they are taking care of you? At some point, people need to take care of themselves. Maybe some aren't ready at 18 to be out ther
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by jm__87 8y ago
You are very confused. I'm not saying those things aren't true. I'm saying they are just unhelpful. I'm not saying to delude yourself by saying "Actually, I am in shape", "I will never embarrass myself at
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by jm__87 8y ago
Perhaps you need to dig deeper to figure out what exactly it is about working for a living that you hate so much. If it just happens to be "all of it", what would you be doing instead if you didn't work? Edit: I should also m
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by jm__87 8y ago
How is it that how you feel about yourself does not matter? It matters quite a bit. I also never said to bury your head in the sand and not improve anything? What I am saying is actually the exact opposite of that. Let me give an example: s
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by jm__87 8y ago
Advertisers nudge you to do something you sort of already want to do. The amount of effort required to buy things is minimal and buying things you want to buy is usually enjoyable. On the other hand, going to therapy is forcing yourself to
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by jm__87 8y ago
I mean, if someone is shot, you can still surgically intervene without them having to participate. Okay, this is clearly not what we were talking about. Sorry I was not more specific in my statement to generalize to all scenarios, ever. E
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by jm__87 8y ago
You can't help someone who doesn't want to help themselves.
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by jm__87 8y ago
Blaming the patient for having a bad attitude just makes the profession of psychotherapy look ineffectual. What sort of magic are you expecting from psychotherapy? You're paying someone to help you solve your problems. You're no
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by jm__87 8y ago
Wouldn't many of your thinking patterns have come from your childhood and teenage years? How did none of this come up when you did CBT? Also, how did you do CBT without serious introspection? It sounds like the therapist you did CBT wi
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by jm__87 8y ago
Personally, I have found it helps to just always try to take a pragmatic perspective: how is what I'm doing right now helping me achieve what I want in life? If you spend an hour thinking about how you suck at various aspects of your l
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by jm__87 8y ago
My viewpoint on mental health: how you feel at any given moment and how long that feeling will persist will depend on the structure of your brain and the environment in which your brain is in. There are a huge number of variables at play. T
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by jm__87 8y ago
CBT felt like an exercise in self-deception to me. And what makes you think your current perception of the world is completely perfect and unbiased? Perhaps the problem is that you are convinced that you have the most accurate picture of
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by jm__87 8y ago
How would this help you, though? I would think for therapy to work, you have to go through the process of challenging your own unhelpful thoughts and beliefs and then act in a way to reinforce new thoughts and beliefs which are more useful.
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by jm__87 8y ago
Historically, human beings have kept people like these pranksters in check by heaping shame and guilt on them along with a punishment. This is just how all societies have always worked. Your attitude that shame and guilt don't work an
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by jm__87 8y ago
Just a word of warning to any insomniacs on here thinking of reading Matthew Walkers book, Why We Sleep: it is probably one of the least helpful books I have ever read in terms of helping you sleep well. It mostly explains the many ways you
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by jm__87 8y ago
Oh, wow. I can't imagine being judged negatively for reading books. I read a lot and almost everyone I tell this to tells me they are impressed and wishes they read more themselves. Never apologize for reading, that just sounds crazy t
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by jm__87 8y ago
I would argue that you should care what other people think about you if you're inclined towards selfish behavior or treating others poorly. Caring what others think would stop you from engaging in behavior that would result in you alie
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by jm__87 8y ago
There isn't really one "correct" way to meditate. There are a number of ways. You can observe thoughts, sounds, bodily awareness, specific bodily sensations, feelings, the breath, look at some specific object or a combination
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by jm__87 8y ago
I just read "Always Hungry" by David Ludwig and it is pretty good. I like the fact the book has a number of recipes as well. If you're trying to lose fat, then really the key is just eat a diet that keeps insulin low. There h
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by jm__87 8y ago
Do you really think Anthony Bourdain wanted to die and hurt the people who care about him? Suicide is what people do when they simply cannot go on any longer - this says nothing about whether they wish they could keep going or not.
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by jm__87 8y ago
I'm pretty sure if you told that to anyone who was suicidal, it would only quicken their departure. These people need some compassion and medical treatment, not more guilt.

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