6 ms·

"Playboy magazines" are part of the problem. Fetishes aren't what has distorted mens' ideas of intimacy and sexual relations. Fetishes can be a perfectly healt

by krapp 2mo ago

"Playboy magazines" are part of the problem. Fetishes aren't what has distorted mens' ideas of intimacy and sexual relations. Fetishes can be a perfectly healthy and consensual form of sexual expression. The problem is the lack of proper sexual education in schools and open dialogue in society because we're limited by Christian taboos to only ever mentioning abstinence until marriage, so porn becomes the only way men learn about sex and intimacy, and they learn to see their own self worth as a function of their sexual prowess, and women as sexual currency. Kill all the porn sites and you also kill any site that provides education about sex and gender issues (which society won't,) especially for gay and transgender kids, and any site about womens' health issues, because "public morals" tends to consider all of it obscene, inherently pornographic or just "icky."

yieldcrv 2mo ago
Huge blind spot to think that content only affects men’s view of intimacy and sexual relations Explain that one for the class Its a common conception but today is your lucky day to articulate it
- tw04 2mo ago
  To be clear, you want me to articulate a point that you fabricated and then attributed to me? I think I’m going to pass, but feel free to continue the discussion with yourself about things I didn’t say.
  - yieldcrv 2mo ago
    to clarify, you're suggesting I introduced a strawman argument because your focus on men wasn't mean to exclude anyone else? that's... interesting. can you instead tell us why you prioritize men's sexuality over others then? or if that's somehow a distortion of what you said too, can you tell us why the focus on men at all?
  - what 2mo ago
    Psst, he didn’t reply to you. He replied to the person that replied to you.
    - yieldcrv 2mo ago
      Good catch, I also wouldn’t have posted if I noticed that
dash2 2mo ago
> The problem is the lack of proper sexual education in schools and open dialogue in society because we're limited by Christian taboos to only ever mentioning abstinence until marriage, so porn becomes the only way men learn about sex and intimacy The UK has a lot of sex education, no such taboos, and is the home of OnlyFans. Are any of the problems you mention better in the UK than the US? > Kill all the porn sites and you also kill any site that provides education about sex and gender issues (which society won't,) especially for gay and transgender kids, There is no reason this has to be true.
- krapp 2mo ago
  >The UK has a lot of sex education, no such taboos, and is the home of OnlyFans. Are any of the problems you mention better in the UK than the US? I don't know, probably. >There is no reason this has to be true. The incessant need of moralists and God-botherers to purge society of anything they deem immoral is the reason. You give these people an inch and and a legal pretext and they take a mile.
  - thin_carapace 2mo ago
    i consider the negative impact of child exposure to hardcore pornography as outweighing the positives of online sex education and would prefer them both deleted rather than having the former involved
    - the_other 2mo ago
      If you ban the latter, the former will proliferate in secret until it becomes the dominant culture.
      - deleted 2mo ago
        [deleted]
      - thin_carapace 2mo ago
        it already is the dominant culture. just look at the birth rate, as well reported damage from hardcore sex eg anal fissure rates, as well the existence of the western term gooning.
donkey_brains 2mo ago
“ we're limited by Christian taboos to only ever mentioning abstinence until marriage, so porn becomes the only way men learn about sex and intimacy, and they learn to see their own self worth as a function of their sexual prowess, and women as sexual currency.” Holy…what the actual…get out of my head. Where can I read more about this idea/how to recover from this type of upbringing? Please?
- mrguyorama 2mo ago
  Therapy and an emotionally mature and patient partner.
PixyMisa 2mo ago
Why are sites about women's health issues posting porn, exactly?
- krapp 2mo ago
  They aren't, I never said they were.
somenameforme 2mo ago
Sex education is, outside of some places in Europe, very rare. You'll certainly find such things far and few between in Asia. So not only is it absent in non-Christian nations, but the places where it is present, like Scandiland for ex, tend to be Christian. Porn, let alone fetish porn, has a big problem because all the actors, including "amateur", are not only 'heavily used' and completely desensitized, but also the sort of people willing to publicly share video of themselves having sex. And so anybody taking any sort of que from there, whatsoever, has no clue what normal sex or normal relations look like.
- socalgal2 2mo ago
  It doesn't require porn. Most movies, tv shows, rom-coms or dramas, have "unrealistic" depictions of "normal" relationships.
  - hobo123 2mo ago
    Indeed, IMHO romance on tv did much more to poison relationships than pr0n. I'm pretty sure most guys know that what they see on pr0n isn't "real."
- krapp 2mo ago
  >Porn, let alone fetish porn, has a big problem because all the actors, including "amateur", are not only 'heavily used' and completely desensitized, but also the sort of people willing to publicly share video of themselves having sex. Maybe, but none of that is germane to the subject at hand. It's the responsibility of parents and other adults to keep children away from porn, and to teach them about sex and normal relations. Removing porn doesn't solve that problem because again the problem isn't the porn, it's the fact that porn is serving a role in educating people that society refuses to.
  - mlrtime 2mo ago
    >It's the responsibility of parents and other adults to keep children away from porn The only way to do that [currently] is legislation. It is impossible otherwise.
cm2012 2mo ago
Lol I have never met someone in my adult life in the usa who was strictly for abstinence before marriage. You are extremely overstating the taboo of it here.
- tstrimple 2mo ago
  Sounds like you're extremely limited in your experiences in the US. Maybe you should sit this one out? Your ignorance is not as good as someone else's lived experience. https://ncac.org/resource/timeline-of-abstinence-only-education-in-u-s-classrooms https://ncac.org/resource/timeline-of-abstinence-only-educat...
- sapphicsnail 2mo ago
  Do you know many religious people? It's pretty common in the evangelical Christian community I grew up in.
- knodi123 2mo ago
  I know dozens. I'm sure I've met thousands. I used to be active in a lutheran (LCMS) church. If that's where you form your social network, you're likely to be _primarily_ around people who believe in abstinence before marriage. And if you're non-religious, you'll have a different social network. America maybe a melting pot, but if you'll let me abuse the metaphor a bit- there's not a lot of stirring going on. There are conservative churches in every city in the US, and this is still a fairly religious country.
  - mlrtime 2mo ago
    LCMS is more conservative as you know, There is a lot of disagreement between ELCA. I know of many lutheran [cool] pastors who had earrings, pony tails, never preached a single word about strict abstinence. There are many gay members of the Lutheran church and are welcomed.
    - knodi123 2mo ago
      LCMS and ELCA are practically different religions, IMO. In fact, my pastor at the time had a long angry rant about one of his peers who gave a speech at an event where ELCA pastors also spoke- he said that speaking alongside them gave the false impression that we condone their behavior (ordaining women, accepting gays), which we absolutely did not. I'm not religious at all anymore. But I value my time as a devout person, it was super educational, and honestly I got a lot out of it. But I wouldn't go back there even for the social aspects.
spoonjim 2mo ago
The first two videos listed on PornHub.com are "FUCK THE CONDOM! Skinny Blonde Girl Opens HER LITTLE ASSHOLE FOR MY BIG COCK" and "2 Friends Want to Try an African Dick in the Ass for the First Time While They're Pissed On and Humiliated." The First Amendment makes this kind of stuff borderline impossible to regulate in the US, but it's pretty obvious that this stuff is harmful to people's brains and that society would be better off it was not available to people (especially minors).
- inigyou 2mo ago
  The first two videos listed on YouTube.com are "FUCK THE SCAMMER! Indian Scammer Opens HIS LITTLE WALLET FOR MY BIG COMPUTER HACK" and "2 Friends Want To Try Benadryl Challenge for the First Time While They're Pissed On Drugs"
- prepend 2mo ago
  Those results are personalized based on your marketing history and surveillance capitalism. So it really is just a reflection of your proclivities than anything societal.
iammrpayments 2mo ago
“Kill all the porn sites and you also kill any site that provides education about sex and gender issues (which society won't,) especially for gay and transgender “*kids*” What?
- krapp 2mo ago
  Read all the words. I know it's Hacker News and that's asking for a lot of emotional maturity in a thread like this but I believe in you.
  - iammrpayments 2mo ago
    You have to be mentally insane to think porn websites provide health education or that they are the only source in a conservative society for adults, and then you mention kids in the same comment. I’m not sure if you’re being edgy or just trolling.
    - gghackernewsgg 2mo ago
      I think what they are saying is that porn is often the only way for kids to learn what sex looks like.
    - inigyou 2mo ago
      I think they're saying that religious extremists classify sex education (especially gay or transgender related) as porn and try to use porn laws to get it banned.
    - duskdozer 2mo ago
      Many of the people in the US behind attempts to ban "pornography" also classify anything involving LGBT people, including children, as pornographic. It's about the specific definition of "pornography" as it will be in the law, and that's what will matter.
sapphicsnail 2mo ago
I think it's important to make a distinction between actual porn sites and sites that just have people talking about LGBTQ stuff. I'm trans and me and my spouse don't want our kids to watch porn.
deleted 2mo ago
[deleted]

by krapp 2mo ago

yieldcrv 2mo ago

Huge blind spot to think that content only affects men’s view of intimacy and sexual relations Explain that one for the class Its a common conception but today is your lucky day to articulate it

tw04 2mo ago
To be clear, you want me to articulate a point that you fabricated and then attributed to me? I think I’m going to pass, but feel free to continue the discussion with yourself about things I didn’t say.
- yieldcrv 2mo ago
  to clarify, you're suggesting I introduced a strawman argument because your focus on men wasn't mean to exclude anyone else? that's... interesting. can you instead tell us why you prioritize men's sexuality over others then? or if that's somehow a distortion of what you said too, can you tell us why the focus on men at all?
- what 2mo ago
  Psst, he didn’t reply to you. He replied to the person that replied to you.
  - yieldcrv 2mo ago
    Good catch, I also wouldn’t have posted if I noticed that

dash2 2mo ago

> The problem is the lack of proper sexual education in schools and open dialogue in society because we're limited by Christian taboos to only ever mentioning abstinence until marriage, so porn becomes the only way men learn about sex and intimacy The UK has a lot of sex education, no such taboos, and is the home of OnlyFans. Are any of the problems you mention better in the UK than the US? > Kill all the porn sites and you also kill any site that provides education about sex and gender issues (which society won't,) especially for gay and transgender kids, There is no reason this has to be true.

krapp 2mo ago
>The UK has a lot of sex education, no such taboos, and is the home of OnlyFans. Are any of the problems you mention better in the UK than the US? I don't know, probably. >There is no reason this has to be true. The incessant need of moralists and God-botherers to purge society of anything they deem immoral is the reason. You give these people an inch and and a legal pretext and they take a mile.
- thin_carapace 2mo ago
  i consider the negative impact of child exposure to hardcore pornography as outweighing the positives of online sex education and would prefer them both deleted rather than having the former involved
  - the_other 2mo ago
    If you ban the latter, the former will proliferate in secret until it becomes the dominant culture.
    - deleted 2mo ago
      [deleted]
    - thin_carapace 2mo ago
      it already is the dominant culture. just look at the birth rate, as well reported damage from hardcore sex eg anal fissure rates, as well the existence of the western term gooning.

donkey_brains 2mo ago

“ we're limited by Christian taboos to only ever mentioning abstinence until marriage, so porn becomes the only way men learn about sex and intimacy, and they learn to see their own self worth as a function of their sexual prowess, and women as sexual currency.” Holy…what the actual…get out of my head. Where can I read more about this idea/how to recover from this type of upbringing? Please?

mrguyorama 2mo ago
Therapy and an emotionally mature and patient partner.

PixyMisa 2mo ago

Why are sites about women's health issues posting porn, exactly?

krapp 2mo ago
They aren't, I never said they were.

somenameforme 2mo ago

Sex education is, outside of some places in Europe, very rare. You'll certainly find such things far and few between in Asia. So not only is it absent in non-Christian nations, but the places where it is present, like Scandiland for ex, tend to be Christian. Porn, let alone fetish porn, has a big problem because all the actors, including "amateur", are not only 'heavily used' and completely desensitized, but also the sort of people willing to publicly share video of themselves having sex. And so anybody taking any sort of que from there, whatsoever, has no clue what normal sex or normal relations look like.

socalgal2 2mo ago
It doesn't require porn. Most movies, tv shows, rom-coms or dramas, have "unrealistic" depictions of "normal" relationships.
- hobo123 2mo ago
  Indeed, IMHO romance on tv did much more to poison relationships than pr0n. I'm pretty sure most guys know that what they see on pr0n isn't "real."
krapp 2mo ago
>Porn, let alone fetish porn, has a big problem because all the actors, including "amateur", are not only 'heavily used' and completely desensitized, but also the sort of people willing to publicly share video of themselves having sex. Maybe, but none of that is germane to the subject at hand. It's the responsibility of parents and other adults to keep children away from porn, and to teach them about sex and normal relations. Removing porn doesn't solve that problem because again the problem isn't the porn, it's the fact that porn is serving a role in educating people that society refuses to.
- mlrtime 2mo ago
  >It's the responsibility of parents and other adults to keep children away from porn The only way to do that [currently] is legislation. It is impossible otherwise.

cm2012 2mo ago

Lol I have never met someone in my adult life in the usa who was strictly for abstinence before marriage. You are extremely overstating the taboo of it here.

tstrimple 2mo ago
Sounds like you're extremely limited in your experiences in the US. Maybe you should sit this one out? Your ignorance is not as good as someone else's lived experience. https://ncac.org/resource/timeline-of-abstinence-only-education-in-u-s-classrooms https://ncac.org/resource/timeline-of-abstinence-only-educat...
sapphicsnail 2mo ago
Do you know many religious people? It's pretty common in the evangelical Christian community I grew up in.
knodi123 2mo ago
I know dozens. I'm sure I've met thousands. I used to be active in a lutheran (LCMS) church. If that's where you form your social network, you're likely to be _primarily_ around people who believe in abstinence before marriage. And if you're non-religious, you'll have a different social network. America maybe a melting pot, but if you'll let me abuse the metaphor a bit- there's not a lot of stirring going on. There are conservative churches in every city in the US, and this is still a fairly religious country.
- mlrtime 2mo ago
  LCMS is more conservative as you know, There is a lot of disagreement between ELCA. I know of many lutheran [cool] pastors who had earrings, pony tails, never preached a single word about strict abstinence. There are many gay members of the Lutheran church and are welcomed.
  - knodi123 2mo ago
    LCMS and ELCA are practically different religions, IMO. In fact, my pastor at the time had a long angry rant about one of his peers who gave a speech at an event where ELCA pastors also spoke- he said that speaking alongside them gave the false impression that we condone their behavior (ordaining women, accepting gays), which we absolutely did not. I'm not religious at all anymore. But I value my time as a devout person, it was super educational, and honestly I got a lot out of it. But I wouldn't go back there even for the social aspects.

spoonjim 2mo ago

The first two videos listed on PornHub.com are "FUCK THE CONDOM! Skinny Blonde Girl Opens HER LITTLE ASSHOLE FOR MY BIG COCK" and "2 Friends Want to Try an African Dick in the Ass for the First Time While They're Pissed On and Humiliated." The First Amendment makes this kind of stuff borderline impossible to regulate in the US, but it's pretty obvious that this stuff is harmful to people's brains and that society would be better off it was not available to people (especially minors).

inigyou 2mo ago
The first two videos listed on YouTube.com are "FUCK THE SCAMMER! Indian Scammer Opens HIS LITTLE WALLET FOR MY BIG COMPUTER HACK" and "2 Friends Want To Try Benadryl Challenge for the First Time While They're Pissed On Drugs"
prepend 2mo ago
Those results are personalized based on your marketing history and surveillance capitalism. So it really is just a reflection of your proclivities than anything societal.

iammrpayments 2mo ago

“Kill all the porn sites and you also kill any site that provides education about sex and gender issues (which society won't,) especially for gay and transgender “*kids*” What?

krapp 2mo ago
Read all the words. I know it's Hacker News and that's asking for a lot of emotional maturity in a thread like this but I believe in you.
- iammrpayments 2mo ago
  You have to be mentally insane to think porn websites provide health education or that they are the only source in a conservative society for adults, and then you mention kids in the same comment. I’m not sure if you’re being edgy or just trolling.
  - gghackernewsgg 2mo ago
    I think what they are saying is that porn is often the only way for kids to learn what sex looks like.
  - inigyou 2mo ago
    I think they're saying that religious extremists classify sex education (especially gay or transgender related) as porn and try to use porn laws to get it banned.
  - duskdozer 2mo ago
    Many of the people in the US behind attempts to ban "pornography" also classify anything involving LGBT people, including children, as pornographic. It's about the specific definition of "pornography" as it will be in the law, and that's what will matter.

sapphicsnail 2mo ago

I think it's important to make a distinction between actual porn sites and sites that just have people talking about LGBTQ stuff. I'm trans and me and my spouse don't want our kids to watch porn.

deleted 2mo ago

[deleted]