14 ms·
Jokes that have made people laugh for thousands of years
- deleted 5y ago[deleted]
- aphroz 5y agoRemember that there is a bias as this has been written by people knowing how to write. So it might not have captured the funniest jokes. P.s.: People who start a joke and don't finish it are the worst
- dotancohen 5y ago> People who start a joke and don't finish it are the worst No, I'll tell you who are the worst.
- wly_cdgr 5y agoDid the author seriously OMIT THE ACTUAL JOKE I hope the BBC falls off a cliff
- sixstringtheory 5y agoI remember having to memorize the prologue to The Canterbury Tales in high school and it seeming dreadfully boring. A couple years ago for some reason I decided to read the rest of the text. I was shocked with the hilarious lewdness and also just the generally familiar description of the human condition written so long ago. One of the funnier ones is the Millers Tale (from Wikipedia; spoilers!): That same night, Absolon comes to the house and begs Alisoun to kiss him. At first she refuses, but Absolon persists, so she offers him one quick kiss. Instead of presenting her lips to Absolon, though, she sticks her backside out the bedroom's "shot-window" (privy vent), and Absolon kisses her "ers" (arse) in the dark. Angry at being fooled, Absolon gets a red-hot coulter from the blacksmith, with which he intends to burn Alisoun in revenge. He returns with it to the window and knocks again, promising Alisoun a gold ring in exchange for a kiss. This time, Nicholas, having gotten up to relieve himself anyway, sticks his buttocks out to get in on the joke and farts thunderously in Absolon's face. Absolon thrusts the coulter "amidst the ers" of Nicholas who cries out for "Water!" to assuage the pain. The fact that someone took the time to write it in such structured rhyming poetry just blows my mind.
- pmoriarty 5y agoYou might enjoy Rabelais' Gargantua and Pantagruel.
- sixstringtheory 5y agoGreat rec, I’d never heard of it, thanks! Joyce definitely jumps out as inspired based on the descriptions, and I’m a fan of his as well.
- noduerme 5y agoMan, this article starts off omitting the punchline to an ancient Roman joke, that was reprinted in 1983, because it's not PC enough for 2022? What the fuck is wrong with people now? Did Lenny Bruce die for nothing?
- aerique 5y agoNot to mention Bill Hicks.
- codingdave 5y agoThose books weren't PC enough for 1983, either. They were testing the limits of acceptability at the time. But free speech is important - people have the right to publish (mostly) whatever they please. Just like this author has the right to choose not to publish the actual joke.
- ramblerman 5y agoPerhaps but it's a bit of an odd subject to pick if you can't stomach writing out the source in full. It's like trying to evaluate Renaissance paintings, but not wanting to see a naked human body in the process.
- pfarrell 5y agoAs someone who actually saw that book back in the ‘80’s. Truly tasteless jokes vol. 3 != bbc.com. You could definitely print those jokes today, but, as in 1983, I wouldn’t expect them in a major worldwide media outlet’s article. I’d expect to find them in a little paperback not kept in the front row of a bookshelf.
- dav_Oz 5y agoWell, I'm also a fan of testing boundaries. For me comedy can serve as a safe space in throwing wild and outrageous shit around without actually offending someone. A rhetorical splatter fest. Over the years I found myself to be in the (vocal) minority. And the taste has indeed shifted, this kind of shameless boundary testing has slipped into the now revolting underground. The article also goes into this: >And what about the contemporary panic about "cancel culture" in comedy? For McGraw, this is not such a unique moment in history. "This phenomenon has been happening ever since there has been stand-up comedy," he says. As the two jesters from Richard I's court demonstrate, comedy has always been risky, and the power has always ultimately rested with the audience. "What is wrong and what is OK is determined not by the teller, but by the audience member, by the receiver, and by their mood, the context they're in, the number of drinks they've had, their culture, their identity," continues McGraw. If the power rests with the audience, the comedian has a tricky task in pleasing them. Stand-up comedian Catherine Bohart knows this pressure well. "The psychology of an audience is really interesting because [if] you seem fine, they are willing to trust you," she says. "But if you are being vulnerable, they can sniff out that anxiety and vulnerability." In our current times (in western society (vocal middle class)) free speech isn't actually valued as much as say 50 years ago. Since the beginning of multiple apparent crises (massive wealth inequality, Trump, Covid, Ukraine ...) freedom of expression gets (carefully) weight against other things which are perceived as more important. Historically (i.e. in practice) once "lines" get drawn this fine thread evolves into an ideological battlefield. To appreciate free speech in its fullest requires the leisure of meta-reasoning, unfortunately once insights are established they also suffer from a decay rate (proportional to the magnitude of disruptions into the cohesive fabric of societies) - if not activley reinforced - and then have to be relearned (the hard way) after the turbulent times of societal changes subside. Because "fake news" is put in new convincing and startling clothes when narratives taken for granted crumble, to cancel something is then just burying it mindlessly, it doesn't at all address the underlying issues. As I'm reading "The Sleepwalkers" (1932) by Hermann Broch anew this isn't something peculiar to our times as the book covers three time periods (1888, 1903, 1918) in then Europe/Germany elegantly intertwining the recurring motive of sleepwalking into deeply uncertain and unsettling times. Lucidity is few and and far between and mostly if at all acknowledged after the fact (which is a carefully constructed cue to the observant reader of 1932).
- bleuarff 5y agoThis idea was present in Philip Jose Farmer's Riverworld series, where all human who ever lived are brought back together. There's a scene that struck me where characters from different eras such as the paleolithic, middle-ages and the 19th century share some jokes and discover they all know the same ones. The idea that such jokes are a universal constant of the human experience through millenia is somewhat recomforting I think.
- pdevr 5y agoThose who visit the link expecting jokes: you can read them in the comments on this page. The BBC page linked to has only one full joke. The following one. Two men had been ridiculing the king at a drunken feast – the king was furious and summoned the men. Clearly disaster was about to befall the men, but then one of them answered: 'We might have said those things, but that was nothing to what we were going to say if the wine hadn't run out!'
- laurieg 5y agoI've heard this joke sometimes called The Oldest Joke that 'Still Works': Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: "In silence". I think I first saw it in the book "The Naked Jape".
- FeepingCreature 5y agoOf course, nobody worried about cancel culture is worried about their audience not finding the jokes funny. The problem is some totally unrelated audience deciding that they must not be told. Used to be someone thought you were funny, they could just throw you a tip. Now you need to worry if Paypal and Patreon think you're acceptable as well. It's like the internet is the king's court, or at least some duke's or other, and his ministers would like you to consider the message your standup is sending to the people.
- nathias 5y ago"A dog, having walked into an inn, did not see anything, (and so he said): 'Shall I open this (door)?'." gets me everytime
- rozab 5y agoI can't help but suspect this is basically the same joke as "A man walks into a bar. 'Ouch.'"
- jeroenhd 5y agoIt's not really the same joke, it's a pun based on how the verb "to see" in the Sumerian language is constructed: https://twitter.com/LinManuelRwanda/status/1505646738627088389 https://twitter.com/LinManuelRwanda/status/15056467386270883... The quality of the joke isn't much higher, as it turns out.
- dwighttk 5y agoI was hoping for more of a list
- traceddd 5y agoWhy even bother describing the joke if the punchline is too crass for publication? Pick another joke.
- elliotshep 5y agoThey didn't include the punchline to first joke, who does that? Someone asked the author of the paper though https://twitter.com/Tenthcentury/status/1507168622208188449 https://twitter.com/Tenthcentury/status/1507168622208188449 Two men were walking along a road talking of this and that. "What do you think," says one. "Which is more fun, defecating or having sex?" The guy says, "Let's ask that prostitute, she's done one as often as the other."
- lqet 5y agoEither I am not getting the punchline behind the punchline, the prostitute is not very successful, or she has serious bowel problems.
- pasquinelli 5y agoif i were a roman prostitute i'd have my clients use the back door to avoid getting pregnant.
- ranguna 5y agoAh makes sense, that indeed makes it less unfunny
- pvaldes 5y agoOr is being paid for...
- blowski 5y agoYou had to be there, I guess.
- bryanrasmussen 5y agoIt's a typical joke popular with the Carthaginians that the Romans all suffered from chronic constipation.
- dotancohen 5y ago
- lqet 5y agoShameless plug: a few months ago I was frustrated by a similar article's lack of jokes and compiled some funny jokes from antiquity: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=28468098 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=28468098 A favorite: A provincial man has come to Rome, and walking on the streets was drawing everyone's attention, as he was a real double of the emperor Augustus. The emperor, having brought him to the palace, looks at him and then asks: "Tell me, young man, did your mother come to Rome anytime?" The reply was: "She never did. But my father frequently was here."
- NicoJuicy 5y agoHe's suggesting that Augustus is his father? Or have the same father. And his non-biological father is the one that regularly went out to the city ( not to cheat) Correct? So more like a brainteaser than a joke, i guess.
- bjackman 5y agoI read an epigram by Martial when I was at school, it translated to: You shave your head to conceal your baldness. How will you conceal your impotence?
- jvanderbot 5y agoNow that's comedy. I love that people haven't changed that much in 1000s of years.
- stavros 5y agoI don't get it :/ Can someone explain? EDIT: Apparently the emperor is asking to see if they share parents, and not to see whether the emperor is his father, as I originally thought.
- JackGreyhat 5y agoIt suggests they have the same father
- glaucon 5y agoThe question implies that his Mother may have had sex with the father of Augustus. The answer suggests that it was his Father that had sex with the mother of Augustus. It's funny because there's a lot more tension associated with the current Emperor having been fathered by the "wrong" person than, under the original assumption, that some rube from the country was fathered by the Emperor's father.
- gentleman11 5y agoTypical of the news, we have an article about a topic that omits the source material. Everyone who clicked that link wanted to read or listen to those old jokes and that’s the one thing the article omits
- dang 5y agoRecent and related: Sumerian dog jokes, or the difficulty of translating dead languages - https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30752942 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30752942 - March 2022 (315 comments)
- allturtles 5y agoWhat a strange article relative to its title. It provides one complete example of a joke, and then admits that no one would actually find it funny these days. It seems to be more about the fact that scatalogical humor as a category has been considered funny for thousands of years. I wonder if there are real examples of jokes that have remained funny for thousands of years. There are ancient comedic writings like the Greek comedies, but from the little I've read of those the humor doesn't really come across either, at least in modern English, though it's also clearly heavily scatalogical.
- nonrandomstring 5y agoI thought it meant the jokes were so funny people laughed for a thousand years.
- codeulike 5y agoThats a long time to laugh
- lucb1e 5y agoThis comment might be more true to the title than the article.
- wanderer_ 5y agoMartial was a famous poet who wrote books of epigrams. He, while less prolific than Shakespeare, similarly invented a lot of common insults. (For those who don't know, I'll save you a google: epigrams were short poems that were lighthearted and often made fun of people using dry classical humor.)
- khazhoux 5y agoSave your click. Not a single joke is listed.
- peter303 5y ago"A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" is supposed based on the plays of Plautus from 2200 years ago.
- la64710 5y agoAgain … just a lot of euro centric cultural anecdotes projected as global. Times have changed.
- 2000UltraDeluxe 5y agoWhy would an article in European media __not__ be focusing on European humour? Mind you, it doesn't ignore humour from the rest of the world and even starts off with several paragraphs about the oldest written joke in the world being from the Middle East.
- la64710 5y agoYawn ….
- civilized 5y agoWould you rather that Europeans write about non-European cultures, or would that just meet with a different complaint? Are Europeans allowed to say anything at all?
- la64710 5y agoYeah but that’s exactly why I comment
- lesgobrandon 5y ago
- fs_tab 5y agoA good collection of ancient jokes is the Philogelos (written in 4th century Greece). Here are a couple of gems: #45. An intellectual during the night ravished his grandmother and for this got a beating from his father. He complained: “You’ve been mounting my mother for a long time, without suffering any consequences from me. And now you’re mad that you found me screwing your mother for the first time ever!” #69. An intellectual checked in on the parents of a dead classmate. The father was wailing: “O son, you have left me a cripple!” The mother was crying: “O son, you have taken the light from my eyes!” Later, the intellectual suggested to his friends: “If he were guilty of all that, he should have been cremated while still alive.” #73. The same intellectual said that the tomb of Scribonia was handsome and lavish, but that it had been built on an unhealthy site. #234. A man with bad breath asked his wife: “Madame, why do you hate me?” And she said in reply: “Because you love me.” Source: https://diotima-doctafemina.org/translations/greek/45-jokes-from-the-laughter-lover/ https://diotima-doctafemina.org/translations/greek/45-jokes-...
- bambax 5y ago#45 is a classic French song! Incredible to see that it's 2000+ years old! Ma mère m'a donné cent sous pour m'acheter des bretelles J'ai gardé mes cent sous pour aller au bordel Chemin faisant, j'ai rencontré grand-mère Où vas-tu mon enfant, je m'en vais au bordel Garde donc tes cent sous, je ferai bien l'affaire J'ai gardé mes cent sous et j'ai baisé grand-mère Chemin rentrant j'ai rencontré mon père D'où viens-tu mon enfant, je viens de baiser grand-mère Enfant de salaud, tu viens de baiser ma mère Salaud toi-même, t'as bien baisé la mienne losely translated: My mother gave me a fiver to buy suspenders I saved the money to go to the whorehouse instead Along the way, I met Grandma Where are you going she said; I said I'm going to the whorehouse Keep your money, I'll do it for free I kept the money and fucked grandma On the way home I met my father What's up said my father; I just fucked grandma, said I Son of a bitch! you fucked my mother SOB yourself, you fucked mine
- gadders 5y agoReminds me of the graffiti I saw in a toilet once. The first person had written "I shagged your Mum." Underneath in different handwriting was "Go home Dad, you're pissed" [drunk].
- perlcat 5y agoOne of the ones from the old horse cavalry days: Two privates fresh on the plains from New York are digging a hole to bury a large animal and are arguing what the animal is. One says it is a horse, and the other maintains it's a mule. The camp doctor comes up, and sets them both straight -- "It's an ass, fellas". Later the chaplain walks up, and asks the two privates what they're doing. "We're digging an ass hole."
- toddwilloughby 5y agoMy wife fucked a prick on my bed and this has been going on for 2 years now and am just getting to find out with the help of spyexpert0@gmail.com after a phone hack carried out on my wife phone.