5 ms·

I've been working for 25+ years in huge, international, rich companies — at very senior (tech) levels. Plenty of travel, plenty of team building, plenty of din

I've been working for 25+ years in huge, international, rich companies — at very senior (tech) levels. Plenty of travel, plenty of team building, plenty of dinners and hotels. My wife asked me a few times about the orgies the movies show, and damn it, I must have always been at the wrong parties. It is interesting how this varies by companies and organizations.

pvarangot 6y ago
I worked for the movie industry only for a couple of years and on very technical low-level roles, almost apprentice level. Think data tech or in color grading and only as a side gig. I also frequented movie festivals. Don't take this personally but I think you were at the wrong parties. Good signs to tell if you are "in" or not: do you know how to get illegal drugs on set? have you ever been to a private event in a hotel room or AirBNB before or after a ceremony? have you ever been in the same room with an A list celebrity or actor when they are using an illegal substance? If the answer to all those is no then yeah it's probably that you are in the wrong parties. If you've been there and like never witnessed a movie level epic orgy then that's great for you. I know they are not usual on some circles, I've heard Disney and Netflix try to keep their staff on a tight leash. Honestly I wished my experience was more like yours because I liked the industry and it was a little bit of a dream of mine to be more involved with the movie creative process, and one of the reasons I didn't get more into it was that I was not comfortable mixing illegal drugs and orgies with work in the way it was usual.
- BrandoElFollito 6y ago
  I worked in tech companies, this is why I was mentioning how this is different between companies and organizations.
  - pvarangot 6y ago
    Oh sorry I thought you were talking about roles on the entertainment industry. I also work in tech and worked in tech most of my life and even talking about this stuff in certain circles can get you fired. Not so much about the drugs thing, but for for reason the tech industry is very conservative regarding sex.
    - BrandoElFollito 6y ago
      I am French so the sex part is, well, French :)
    - P_I_Staker 6y ago
      > but for for reason the tech industry is very conservative regarding sex. IDK about that it's the same or slightly better than the rest of corporate America IME. Maybe a bit more lenient, if anything. Industry is "very conservative" because talking about sex can almost instantaneously turn into sexual harassment. So you have to be careful talking about it. Drugs don't have the same liability concerns, if people aren't obviously loaded on the job. I'm talking about frivolous lawsuits as well as legitimate grievances. People have a right not to deal with sexual discomfort (I don't have a better name for this concept - the uncomfortable feelings people have when talking about sex). Some people are very very uncomfortable talking about sex for various reasons. You can't even mention it without toing this line, or potentially crossing it. I have no idea what you're talking about regarding the tech industry being conservative on sex. I've met so many very openly LGBTQ in software. It definitely feels more common than elsewhere, especially with these corporate jobs.
      - bobthepanda 6y ago
        The discomfort is considered to be part of the broad topic of ‘consent’. In a similar manner to people consenting to actual sexual actions, you should get consent about talking about sex, because people’s boundaries are all over the place, and you’re almost certainly not going to get informed, free consent in a workplace with power dynamics.
        P_I_Staker 6y ago
        Right, in a way that's what I'm talking about. I still wanted to come up with a separate term for the "feelings", vs. the concept of consent which is designed to prevent people inflicting these feelings on parties against their will. I still don't like my own choice of wording... feels kinda weak, or an understatement
  - nomdep 6y ago
    I believe the reason you don't see this kind of parties in tech is because the industry is filled with people who are introverts, not specially groomed/attractive and/or not very good reading social cues.
    - ikiris 6y ago
      These parties are absolutely in tech...
      - cbozeman 6y ago
        Go on... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
        coldtea 6y ago
        https://www.newsweek.com/silicon-valley-uncovered-brotopia-lifts-lid-drug-fueled-sex-party-attended-779564 https://www.newsweek.com/silicon-valley-uncovered-brotopia-l...
        mckirk 6y ago
        If we already had a GPT-deepfake interface I would now ask it to generate a costumed Elon Musk confusedly 'John Travolta'ing (the Pulp Fiction meme) in the middle of a SciFi sex party. In a year or two, perhaps.
    - thu2111 6y ago
      No, I don't think so. That's a 1980s era explanation. There are people who aren't especially attractive in all industries. Even in Hollywood, look at what Weinstein got up to, and he isn't exactly Adonis reborn. I think the explanation is simpler: music and acting jobs are easy. Lots of people can sing, dance, semi-convincingly repeat lines written for them by other people, or even write scripts. It's just not a very skilled set of jobs. It doesn't take 5 years of study to become a great actor, people just luck into it all the time. Anywhere you get the intersection of a lot of money and easy jobs, you get jobs being parcelled out according to criteria like looks, knowing the right people, having the right parents, having the right party attitudes, or how easily they get into bed. After all, what other criteria are they going to use to differentiate between the masses of hopefuls applying for their chance at fame and fortune. In contrast, tech is hard. It takes years of study to even get in on the bottom rung. Then it takes many more years of obsessive-level study and work to climb to the top. The difference in skill between a newbie and a master is enormous. If you're interviewing for a master software developer, and say "hey, you party much?" and they reply with something lame and boring like "no, I prefer to spend time with my wife and kids" then in a well functioning organisation they will still get the job. In quite a few other industries, if the interviewer is young that reply could easily cause you to be ranked lower than some other candidate who said "I'm always up for a good time!"
- lostgame 6y ago
  Yikes, my answer is yes to all of these, and, indeed, I witnessed and partook in several of said orgies. They certainly do happen, for sure.
- g00gler 6y ago
  I don't think OP was in the entertainment industry. He has worked with several large companies at a very senior level and has never experienced anything like what is alleged to occur in the entertainment industry.
  - BrandoElFollito 6y ago
    Yes, thanks for clarifying - I should have highlighted that I worked in tech. This is why I was wondering how life is different between companies (and even organizations within a company).
- bsenftner 6y ago
  I worked in film visual effects for nearly a decade, and my wife was a AAA producer (since left the industry.) Perhaps because we were a couple, I never encountered any sex orgies, but the drugs, oh yeah, the drugs were very prevalent.
- Bakary 6y ago
  The appeal of drugs and orgies is perfectly understandable. What I don't get is the appeal of mixing those with work and hierarchical relationships.
  - pvarangot 6y ago
    Well it will make it easier to get promoted if you are good looking and/or mentally and physically fit enough to do a shit ton of drugs every day so you are "friends" with everyone. So yeah a lot of people don't want it to go away. I don't like mixing it with professional life because it pushes people that can't take it away from a job were partying and getting intoxicated is "required". Even if they are good at that job.
01100011 6y ago
Keep in mind that there are a lot of serious, dedicated folks in the upper ranks of most businesses... and then there are other types of folks. Ex-CEO of Broadcom is one example. I worked at a startup where the well-connected CTO invited me to come to Tijuana with him and the secretary for a night of indiscretions. I've found having long hair and looking like a partier gets people to open up to you and you find out some of the straight laced folks you thought you knew are much different.
- BrandoElFollito 6y ago
  Of course individual cases happen - I know of a few. I was more thinking about the way corporate parties are depicted in media (Hollywood movies, mostly). I am French and worked for French, German and US companies (tech) and I never witnessed what was discussed above. Flights in corporate jets were convenient and everyone was either chatting, or reading, or working. Multiple week travels in great hotels were pleases where people got to know, had dinner and then everyone went to their room. Parties were parties (including after-parties), some drinking, lots of laughing and that's all. All this from "general population" parties/travels, to top level ones. Like I said: I must have been to the wrong parties :)
  - tsukurimashou 6y ago
    In France you have free parties to make up for that (or at least HAD, before Covid)
  - coldtea 6y ago
    https://www.businessinsider.com/munich-re-sex-party-corporate-orgies-germany-sex-as-a-business-incentive-2011-5 https://www.businessinsider.com/munich-re-sex-party-corporat...
mike_d 6y ago
It really depends on if you are the person who can sign a contract or influence a vendor decision.
- BrandoElFollito 6y ago
  It probably depends where. I was signing contracts or giving GO/NOGO for others (as customers of vendors, very large contracts) and I was getting invitations to dinners, sport events or "company walk-though" in interesting places (that I never took because this the way I work). These were "normal" sales invitations, no hidden agenda.
soma2009 6y ago
Since we’re sharing weird work stories, I was working for an early cloud provider in SF back around 2010, coming out from NYC about once a month or so. Got into the office right off the plane late afternoon once and one of the sales guys wanted to get drinks after work, told me he’d come by the company apartment to get me. So he swings by to pick me up and I didn’t ask where we were headed, figured just some cocktail bar or something normal. Nope, we roll up to a strip club out near North Beach. It actually was my first time in one, I was young and it never was my thing. The guy had a bottle of vodka on a shelf behind the bar that he used for clients (but honestly for whoever), and the strippers all knew him. I start talking to one of the performers about regular things - the school she was studying at, her family, etc. Then somehow we start talking about how they had a private room that was mainly for Zynga employees, with video game setups, bottle service and private dances. She made it clear that lots of tech companies came in to entertain clients, investors, and whoever else they wanted to. Last time I let a sales guy bring me somewhere without telling me what the plan was first.
- vincentmarle 6y ago
  > Last time I let a sales guy bring me somewhere without telling me what the plan was first Wow, that sales guy must be thinking: last time I’m bringing the prude guy.
- WWLink 6y ago
  This kinda reminds me of an experience I had years ago, working at a small startup that was "disrupting" a particular industry. One of my coworkers was interested in this other company's software products so we contacted them and they sent a couple of sales people over for a meeting. Okay, here's what happened. I'll never forget it because it was so weird. There was a younger guy and a much older guy. They introduce themselves, the younger one hands us business cards and pamphlets, and then the oldest one... starts telling us names of all the people he sold products to. It was so weird because neither of them knew much about the product they were selling. Just their customers. And they tried hard to figure out if we knew any of their customers. Given our company's culture, we were all fairly new and thrown off guard by that lol. I think only one of us knew any of the people he was talking about. We ended up not buying any of their products, because among other things, it was the worst sales pitch I've ever heard of. Like they relied on connections lol.
coldtea 6y ago
Seniority doesn't cut into it, it must also be the right person sending the right signals (and often sharding some backstories). They'll seldom if ever make the mistake of inviting a clean cut / square type of person.

pvarangot 6y ago

I worked for the movie industry only for a couple of years and on very technical low-level roles, almost apprentice level. Think data tech or in color grading and only as a side gig. I also frequented movie festivals. Don't take this personally but I think you were at the wrong parties. Good signs to tell if you are "in" or not: do you know how to get illegal drugs on set? have you ever been to a private event in a hotel room or AirBNB before or after a ceremony? have you ever been in the same room with an A list celebrity or actor when they are using an illegal substance? If the answer to all those is no then yeah it's probably that you are in the wrong parties. If you've been there and like never witnessed a movie level epic orgy then that's great for you. I know they are not usual on some circles, I've heard Disney and Netflix try to keep their staff on a tight leash. Honestly I wished my experience was more like yours because I liked the industry and it was a little bit of a dream of mine to be more involved with the movie creative process, and one of the reasons I didn't get more into it was that I was not comfortable mixing illegal drugs and orgies with work in the way it was usual.

BrandoElFollito 6y ago
I worked in tech companies, this is why I was mentioning how this is different between companies and organizations.
- pvarangot 6y ago
  Oh sorry I thought you were talking about roles on the entertainment industry. I also work in tech and worked in tech most of my life and even talking about this stuff in certain circles can get you fired. Not so much about the drugs thing, but for for reason the tech industry is very conservative regarding sex.
  - BrandoElFollito 6y ago
    I am French so the sex part is, well, French :)
  - P_I_Staker 6y ago
    > but for for reason the tech industry is very conservative regarding sex. IDK about that it's the same or slightly better than the rest of corporate America IME. Maybe a bit more lenient, if anything. Industry is "very conservative" because talking about sex can almost instantaneously turn into sexual harassment. So you have to be careful talking about it. Drugs don't have the same liability concerns, if people aren't obviously loaded on the job. I'm talking about frivolous lawsuits as well as legitimate grievances. People have a right not to deal with sexual discomfort (I don't have a better name for this concept - the uncomfortable feelings people have when talking about sex). Some people are very very uncomfortable talking about sex for various reasons. You can't even mention it without toing this line, or potentially crossing it. I have no idea what you're talking about regarding the tech industry being conservative on sex. I've met so many very openly LGBTQ in software. It definitely feels more common than elsewhere, especially with these corporate jobs.
    - bobthepanda 6y ago
      The discomfort is considered to be part of the broad topic of ‘consent’. In a similar manner to people consenting to actual sexual actions, you should get consent about talking about sex, because people’s boundaries are all over the place, and you’re almost certainly not going to get informed, free consent in a workplace with power dynamics.
      - P_I_Staker 6y ago
        Right, in a way that's what I'm talking about. I still wanted to come up with a separate term for the "feelings", vs. the concept of consent which is designed to prevent people inflicting these feelings on parties against their will. I still don't like my own choice of wording... feels kinda weak, or an understatement
- nomdep 6y ago
  I believe the reason you don't see this kind of parties in tech is because the industry is filled with people who are introverts, not specially groomed/attractive and/or not very good reading social cues.
  - ikiris 6y ago
    These parties are absolutely in tech...
    - cbozeman 6y ago
      Go on... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
      - coldtea 6y ago
        https://www.newsweek.com/silicon-valley-uncovered-brotopia-lifts-lid-drug-fueled-sex-party-attended-779564 https://www.newsweek.com/silicon-valley-uncovered-brotopia-l...
        mckirk 6y ago
        If we already had a GPT-deepfake interface I would now ask it to generate a costumed Elon Musk confusedly 'John Travolta'ing (the Pulp Fiction meme) in the middle of a SciFi sex party. In a year or two, perhaps.
  - thu2111 6y ago
    No, I don't think so. That's a 1980s era explanation. There are people who aren't especially attractive in all industries. Even in Hollywood, look at what Weinstein got up to, and he isn't exactly Adonis reborn. I think the explanation is simpler: music and acting jobs are easy. Lots of people can sing, dance, semi-convincingly repeat lines written for them by other people, or even write scripts. It's just not a very skilled set of jobs. It doesn't take 5 years of study to become a great actor, people just luck into it all the time. Anywhere you get the intersection of a lot of money and easy jobs, you get jobs being parcelled out according to criteria like looks, knowing the right people, having the right parents, having the right party attitudes, or how easily they get into bed. After all, what other criteria are they going to use to differentiate between the masses of hopefuls applying for their chance at fame and fortune. In contrast, tech is hard. It takes years of study to even get in on the bottom rung. Then it takes many more years of obsessive-level study and work to climb to the top. The difference in skill between a newbie and a master is enormous. If you're interviewing for a master software developer, and say "hey, you party much?" and they reply with something lame and boring like "no, I prefer to spend time with my wife and kids" then in a well functioning organisation they will still get the job. In quite a few other industries, if the interviewer is young that reply could easily cause you to be ranked lower than some other candidate who said "I'm always up for a good time!"
lostgame 6y ago
Yikes, my answer is yes to all of these, and, indeed, I witnessed and partook in several of said orgies. They certainly do happen, for sure.
g00gler 6y ago
I don't think OP was in the entertainment industry. He has worked with several large companies at a very senior level and has never experienced anything like what is alleged to occur in the entertainment industry.
- BrandoElFollito 6y ago
  Yes, thanks for clarifying - I should have highlighted that I worked in tech. This is why I was wondering how life is different between companies (and even organizations within a company).
bsenftner 6y ago
I worked in film visual effects for nearly a decade, and my wife was a AAA producer (since left the industry.) Perhaps because we were a couple, I never encountered any sex orgies, but the drugs, oh yeah, the drugs were very prevalent.
Bakary 6y ago
The appeal of drugs and orgies is perfectly understandable. What I don't get is the appeal of mixing those with work and hierarchical relationships.
- pvarangot 6y ago
  Well it will make it easier to get promoted if you are good looking and/or mentally and physically fit enough to do a shit ton of drugs every day so you are "friends" with everyone. So yeah a lot of people don't want it to go away. I don't like mixing it with professional life because it pushes people that can't take it away from a job were partying and getting intoxicated is "required". Even if they are good at that job.

01100011 6y ago

Keep in mind that there are a lot of serious, dedicated folks in the upper ranks of most businesses... and then there are other types of folks. Ex-CEO of Broadcom is one example. I worked at a startup where the well-connected CTO invited me to come to Tijuana with him and the secretary for a night of indiscretions. I've found having long hair and looking like a partier gets people to open up to you and you find out some of the straight laced folks you thought you knew are much different.

BrandoElFollito 6y ago
Of course individual cases happen - I know of a few. I was more thinking about the way corporate parties are depicted in media (Hollywood movies, mostly). I am French and worked for French, German and US companies (tech) and I never witnessed what was discussed above. Flights in corporate jets were convenient and everyone was either chatting, or reading, or working. Multiple week travels in great hotels were pleases where people got to know, had dinner and then everyone went to their room. Parties were parties (including after-parties), some drinking, lots of laughing and that's all. All this from "general population" parties/travels, to top level ones. Like I said: I must have been to the wrong parties :)
- tsukurimashou 6y ago
  In France you have free parties to make up for that (or at least HAD, before Covid)
- coldtea 6y ago
  https://www.businessinsider.com/munich-re-sex-party-corporate-orgies-germany-sex-as-a-business-incentive-2011-5 https://www.businessinsider.com/munich-re-sex-party-corporat...

mike_d 6y ago

It really depends on if you are the person who can sign a contract or influence a vendor decision.

BrandoElFollito 6y ago
It probably depends where. I was signing contracts or giving GO/NOGO for others (as customers of vendors, very large contracts) and I was getting invitations to dinners, sport events or "company walk-though" in interesting places (that I never took because this the way I work). These were "normal" sales invitations, no hidden agenda.

soma2009 6y ago

Since we’re sharing weird work stories, I was working for an early cloud provider in SF back around 2010, coming out from NYC about once a month or so. Got into the office right off the plane late afternoon once and one of the sales guys wanted to get drinks after work, told me he’d come by the company apartment to get me. So he swings by to pick me up and I didn’t ask where we were headed, figured just some cocktail bar or something normal. Nope, we roll up to a strip club out near North Beach. It actually was my first time in one, I was young and it never was my thing. The guy had a bottle of vodka on a shelf behind the bar that he used for clients (but honestly for whoever), and the strippers all knew him. I start talking to one of the performers about regular things - the school she was studying at, her family, etc. Then somehow we start talking about how they had a private room that was mainly for Zynga employees, with video game setups, bottle service and private dances. She made it clear that lots of tech companies came in to entertain clients, investors, and whoever else they wanted to. Last time I let a sales guy bring me somewhere without telling me what the plan was first.

vincentmarle 6y ago
> Last time I let a sales guy bring me somewhere without telling me what the plan was first Wow, that sales guy must be thinking: last time I’m bringing the prude guy.
WWLink 6y ago
This kinda reminds me of an experience I had years ago, working at a small startup that was "disrupting" a particular industry. One of my coworkers was interested in this other company's software products so we contacted them and they sent a couple of sales people over for a meeting. Okay, here's what happened. I'll never forget it because it was so weird. There was a younger guy and a much older guy. They introduce themselves, the younger one hands us business cards and pamphlets, and then the oldest one... starts telling us names of all the people he sold products to. It was so weird because neither of them knew much about the product they were selling. Just their customers. And they tried hard to figure out if we knew any of their customers. Given our company's culture, we were all fairly new and thrown off guard by that lol. I think only one of us knew any of the people he was talking about. We ended up not buying any of their products, because among other things, it was the worst sales pitch I've ever heard of. Like they relied on connections lol.

coldtea 6y ago

Seniority doesn't cut into it, it must also be the right person sending the right signals (and often sharding some backstories). They'll seldom if ever make the mistake of inviting a clean cut / square type of person.