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Ask HN: Trivial etiquette question - can he touch my laptop screen?
Coworkers often touch my laptop screen, jabbing at some interesting item. I don't like it. Actually, I think it is rude, but I feel bad about requesting that they don't do it, or even quietly getting out my eyeglass polishing cloth and removing the mark in front of them.
Is it OK to touch someone's laptop screen?
Or am I being over-sensitive?
As a freelancer, I have my own (expensive) laptop, whereas many co-workers have company-bought ones, but I felt that way even when I had a company one.
- mtinkerhess 17y agoI'd say it's more rude to touch someone else's screen than to ask someone not to touch your screen. Go ahead and tell them not to dirty up your screen. The situation with the company laptop is a little more complicated because the property is, in some ways, as much theirs as it is yours. Still, you're using the equipment so you have a right to keep it smudge-free, whether by wiping off the mark or by asking them not to do that. Hopefully they'd take the hint if they saw you wiping away the smudge.
- stijnm 17y agoIt is not OK for others to smudge/grease/smear/taint/foul or otherwise violate your screen. No matter how expensive the screen is or who owns it. I used to be one of those until I forced myself to take a pencil everywhere for if I could not hold back the urge. This keeps the screen clean and makes pointing more accurate. My advice: Don't feel bad about telling them to back off - they may not even know this is not done. And if they do it again, compare it to if they had to use a (sweaty) friend's keyboard or mobile phone. So, limiting possible exposure to this is in everyone's favour.
- mgrouchy 17y agoI agree completely, people do this all the time, waving pens at my screen, etc. I think the easiest way to do it was the way you suggested, most people will get the hint if you just polish the smudge they left in front of them. You don't have to be rude or anything. You can even be discreet about it. People will still get the point.
- joe_the_user 17y agoA "space violation" which doesn't involve actual damage to something might be a matter of social/cultural etiquette. Different cultures have different distances that people stand apart from each other or different amounts of touching between friends and acquaintances. But I think its always over-the-line when a touch can actual do some small amount of damage to the item - any touch to laptop screen is going to be reducing its lifetime at least a bit.
- ewjordan 17y agoBut I think its always over-the-line when a touch can actual do some small amount of damage to the item - any touch to laptop screen is going to be reducing its lifetime at least a bit. Bah. Well, in theory, maybe. But can anyone here honestly say that they've ever had to get rid of a laptop even one day earlier than they would have anyways because of the damaging effects of finger oils on the screen? There are so many things in a laptop that degrade more quickly than the screen surface, I just don't think it's a very legitimate worry. What's the worst case scenario from touching a laptop screen a lot, other than the minor annoyance of having to wipe the crap off from time to time?
- __david__ 17y agoReducing its lifetime? How on earth can a touch reduce the lifetime of your laptop lcd? The insides that actually create the pictures are separated by layers of plastic you know...
- Tangurena 17y agoI had a co-worker who used to stop what she was doing, and blurt some variation of "here, let me help you clean that fingerprint off my monitor" and then proceed to engage in her ritual of cleaning the CRT (this predated LCD monitors). Several other coworkers intentionally would poke the monitor with their fingers (the grease from the side of your nose is great for this), just to get a rise out of her. The day she pulled her little routine on one of the vice presidents was her last day at the office. She was out of the building before lunch.
- dryicerx 17y agodon't touch it slaps with large trout so sad a smudge
- keefe 17y agoI remember getting chewed out when I was assisting in some training class for my company and accidentally touched this guy's screen.... I think it's a pretty common gripe and there's nothing inherently wrong with asking them not to do it, but if I were freelancing? I certainly would not be complaining about trivia like this. In social situations, I find it best to be positive, positive, positive!
- deleted 17y ago[deleted]
- jhancock 17y agoI ask people to use the back of their finger (the fingernail side), instead of the part with all the oil. Its a nice compromise and keeps off most smudges while not taking away people's ability to express themselves. As for a pen, that simply warrants breaking someone's hand for a first offense. Word will get around quick after that ;).
- jlees 17y agoSometimes if I'm pointing something out I can't help but touch the screen by mistake but I'm always apologetic about it :/
- reid 17y agoI've tried moving my laptop further away from their hand, but that was apparently too subtle. Next time I'll be more vocal about it.
- californiaguy 17y agoIf you don't have the personality to tell them, just print out a small label that says "Please don't touch the screen" and tape it to your laptop.
- vijayr 17y agoor "Thank you for not touching the screen"
- pbhj 17y agoOr "touch the screen and I'll fscking kill you" ...
- dtby 17y agoAchtung! Alle touristen und non-technischen lookenpeepers! Das machine is nicht fur fingerpoken und mittengrabben. Is easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und poppencorken mit spitzen sparken. Das machine is diggen by experten only. Is nicht fur gerwerken by das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen das cottenpicken hands in das pockets. Relaxen und watchen das blinkenlights.
- skwaddar 17y ago“No Smoking. No Spitting. The MGT.”
- mad44 17y agoBoy, it seems like your post hit a nerve. On the other hand (no pun intended), we look forward to buying Apple's tablet... Go figure.
- Timothee 17y agoIf the Apple tablet is real, it will most likely come with that fancy-schmancy oleophobic screen they put on the iPhone 3GS. So, no problemo: put it in your oversized pocket, take it out, and "boom" (tm) it's clean.
- duncanj 17y agoI think it's fine to touch the screen.
- vijayr 17y agoonly when it is a touch screen, not the normal ones
- JeremyChase 17y agoYou think it is fine to touch the screen, but this thread is showing you that many people do not agree. Please do not touch my screen.
- SwellJoe 17y agoI've seen children do this (and asked them politely to look but not touch), but adults, really? You could keep a couple of laser pointers handy for the touchy ones. Just hand it to them whenever they show up. Everybody likes lasers.
- tsally 17y agoWow I'm hearing tons of complicated ways to avoid direct conversation. If you pay several thousand dollars for a machine, I'm pretty sure you get to decide to gets to do what with it. If it is your companies screen, you are still responsible for it, so the same thing applies. Next time it happens, just politely explain how you feel. There's no need for the passive aggressive solutions that a few people are suggesting.
- devin 17y agoThe reason people have all these passive aggressive solutions is because they feel kind of embarrassed that they have such an attachment to an inanimate object. It's like telling someone not to touch your baby. I know most people will claim that it's just the cost of the item, but in reality I think it's that they're addicted to that little window into the machine. I know I am.
- Sephr 17y agoIt's more likely because you don't want to have to clean fingerprints off the screen.
- devin 17y agoWow, this is proof that this place is turning into Digg more and more every day.
- nihilocrat 17y agoI think the passive aggressive solutions exist because most people have terrible communication skills. It seems like it all comes from the assumption that if you actually disagree with someone or want them to behave a different way around you, you must be a huge asshole that no one will respect. If we communicate indirectly, we get to claim the higher moral ground because we were merely "passive" while the other person OBVIOUSLY didn't get our EXTREMELY OBVIOUS indirect message and therefore must be not only an asshole but an idiot. Now the other guy is the rude idiot. Problem solved!
- jeffcoat 17y ago
- cschep 17y agoI always start the sentence with... "I know this is weird, but..." It helps me get to the actual point of direct confrontation, but by blaming it on myself it helps absorb some of the awkward. Truly though, I hate it when people touch my laptop's screen!
- cduan 17y agoI'd also offer them an option, like a mouse to point with.
- pbhj 17y agoWhat use is a mouse if they don't know how to use a finger to point without touching? They'd probably start off by licking it or something.
- lucifer 17y agoThere is nothing weird about wanting to protect your eye sight. This is one of those commonalities that does not require explanation. Its a shared experience: nobody('s eyes) likes looking at smudged up screens.
- kailoa 17y agoBig big upvote. This works much better than the passive-agressive method of silently glaring and cleaning your screen in front of co-worker. Here are more examples of the same technique: "This is totally my own OCD, but it drives me crazy if..." "Just a sec, I have to apologize, but..." "It's probably just me, but it kills me when..." (Don't forget to smile and be apologetic, tone is key)
- cakesy 17y agoDamn, what a bunch of sissies. Don't apologise for stuff that isn't your fault, tell them not to touch your screen. No need to make an excuse. Don't be rude, but don't be ridiculous over the top apologetic either.
- 17y ago
- TweedHeads 17y agoCreate a funny web page and have it bookmarked on your browser. Whenever someone approaches you, quickly switch to that web page. donttouchmyfuckingscreenorillkillyou.com is available.
- TweedHeads 17y agoThis bookmarklet may help: javascript:document.write("<h1 style='font-size:10em'>Don't touch my screen!</h1>")
- TweedHeads 17y agoAlso this one (Firefox only) javascript:(function (){document.querySelector("body").style.MozTransform="rotate(180deg)";})()
- _pius 17y agoIt's completely unacceptable to touch someone else's laptop screen without asking.
- cesare 17y agoI hate when people do this. And I'm surprised by how many people don't understand the problem. It's not necessary to touch the screen even if you're pointing something. Grab the mouse (or use the touchpad) or just point without touching. Is it so difficult? It's obviously a habit acquired by interacting with paper and less fragile (and expensive) media. But for me it is a sign of ignorance. I hate this so much that I avoid to bring my laptop at meetings unless it is strictly necessary.
- zmimon 17y ago> Grab the mouse (or use the touchpad) or just point without touching. Is it so difficult? Point without touching please. I never want to touch someone else's mouse or keyboard. They are among the dirtiest most germ infected places you can find and touching them is bad for both you and the person with the keyboard / mouse / touchpad.
- thingie 17y agoWell, I would just tell them not to do it, because the screen gets dirty and you have to either clean it all the time, or you can't see anything on it. It's not rude to say something like "Well, I'm sorry, but please, don't touch the screen, it gets dirty, ok?". At least I think so. Of course this is most likely very depending on the culture and place where do you live.
- msie 17y agoFirst of all, you shouldn't apologize for telling people not to touch your screen. I would be curt about it when it happens: "Please don't touch the screen, thanks." And say it with a smile. That way it would almost be a disposable, passing remark like: "Watch your step.". Making a big production of it would be worse for both sides. You want to say something and just move on so the incident doesn't linger too long. In a way, you are trusting the person to get the point. If he/she doesn't get it then it's their fault, not yours. I can see how this would be difficult if it doesn't suit your personality or the one you project at the office.
- afed 17y agoThat isn't fucking acceptable, invite the douche bag to clean your screen for you the next time he does that.
- dimarco 17y agoMy boss used touch my screen with a pencil. He'd actually draw light lines on the screen with the graphite. I had to buy a box of wet wipes to clear the screen whenever he left my desk. Drove me nuts.
- jknupp 17y agoOnly if he buys you dinner first
- travisjeffery 17y agoHaha, yay! Now I can bring people to this post to show them that I'm not alone. I agree wholeheartedly, why do they just have to touch our screens? I'm a direct person so I just say swiftly and quickly "Don't touch my screen."
- qeek 17y agoI told you homeboy U can't touch this (...) Look in my eyes, man U can't touch this
- deleted 17y ago[deleted]
- davewasthere 17y agoI put a sign on the top of my monitor saying "Don't touch the screen". And I'd smack people's fingers with my ruler when they did. Damn fingerprints! :-)
- zackattack 17y agoDon't touch my screen. Yes I'm serious. Go clean it up. Now. I use this method and it helps me avoid building up resentment towards people.
- pj 17y agoThere was an article here the other day from some hacker that almost proudly stated that he went through 2 or 3 laptops a year. I thought this was absolutely ridiculous. My laptops last five years or more. What a waste of money. If you love something, take care of it and it'll last longer and treat you well. We live in a disposable society. I was always taught to take care of things so they would last. You too apparently. I like a clean screen.
- pbhj 17y ago"Oh, you like the screen, apparently if you clean it with urea it stays brighter [hushed tone] I know a cheap source, I manufacture my own [looks down momentarily],[returning to conversation] now where were we ..."
- brandon272 17y agoIt's mostly clients who touch my screen, and they also happen to be the last people I would ever say anything to. But truth be told, I don't really consider it that big of a deal. I am of the opinion that you should pick your battles in life and in most cases it's just easier to take a cloth out of your drawer and wipe the screen than it is to say something to someone who may take it too personally or cause you unneeded grief in some way. When you tell someone not to touch your screen, most of them will immediately feel embarrassed. Some people will channel this embarrassment into not touching screens anymore and others will take your comment too personally and channel this embarrassment into making your life unpleasant in some way that just isn't worth it.
- planckscnst 17y agoWow. I must admit that I'm guilty of being a screen-toucher. It's not out of ignorance or disrespect or anything like that; I've been around computers my whole life. I have no idea why I do it, but I've even done it a couple of seconds after someone asked me not to. I don't get annoyed at all at people when they tell me not to, I get embarrassed and sometimes annoyed at myself for having done it (especially if it's repeated).
- IsaacSchlueter 17y agoYou should just not have conversations near other people's monitors about what's on their monitors. Ask them to come to your cube, or take a screenshot and circle the spot in question.
- __david__ 17y agoI see a lot of posts from the anal retentive crowd. Here's the opposite opinion: I think it's ok to touch laptop screens. I touch my own and if I'm interested enough in pointing something out I may touch yours because at that point I'm at a completely different place mentally and not thinking about your little quirks. One of my co workers stressed out every time I touched his screen but it didn't make me stop. I'd avoid it when I remembered but I frankly don't believe it's a big issue. He'd let a loud annoyed sigh and reach for the cleaner that he kept by his desk and I'd laugh at him. Your pet peeve is not really my problem. Your expensive screen is not brittle and will not crack at the slightest touch. It will not melt under the powerful corrosive force of my finger oils. It just makes a little streak. Get over it and carry one of those fuzzy lcd wipey things with you if it bothers you that much. Anyway, people like me exist. We will annoy you but it's (mostly) unintentional. You can try to point out your annoyance in all sorts of amusing/passive aggressive ways but it's not going to completely work. It's still going to happen. Realize that you're being a bit irrational and get over it.
- IsaacSchlueter 17y agoI've learned that people like you exist, and there is an easy way to deal with them. Simply flat-out refuse to engage in a meaningful dialog unless you stop touching my fucking screen. In fact, I'll even get up and walk away if necessary. ("How about we go discuss this at your monitor?") It's not about the expense, and calling it a pet peeve is very dismissive. It's about respect and personal space more than anything else. Consider this: I'm more comfortable without pants on. When I work from home, in my own space, I'm usually not wearing pants. But when I come into the office, I put on pants, because I have some modicum of respect for the people I work with, and I know that pantslessness is going to make people uncomfortable. Your behavior doesn't bother you, but ignoring the fact that it bothers others is the very definition of rudeness. Do you also lick strangers?
- jaxn 17y agoThere is a comment above about people being so attached to inanimate objects, you comment kinda solidifies that for me. It is a laptop, not your person (or my person, I won't let people touch my screen either).
- cognominal 17y agoWith thé upcoming generalisation of touch screens it will be difficult people not to touch the screen. On the other hand a pal upgrading from the iPhone 3G to 3GS told me that his preferred feature was the oleophobic screen. So touching other screen may not be an étiquette problem anymore but a normal way of interaction.
- chrischen 17y agoYea everyone loves touching mine too. But since mine is hard, it probably isn't harmful, but it is annoying. I have the macbook pro with the hard black screen. Though the matte screen might be more of a concern if someone touches it.
- tungstenfurnace 17y agoBuy some a soft cloth and some cleaning fluid (that won't dissolve your screen). Make a big show of cleaning it.
- quellhorst 17y agoI say "Don't touch the screen, it easily smudges or gets scratched."
- bfinch 17y agoInteresting to see all the followups. I had no idea that anyone cared about this. Reminds me of guys who don't like people touching their cars. I'd encourage all the folks advising the OP to be curt or to ostentatiously rub out the smudge to imagine a guy in a polo shirt wearing Ray-Bans. Perhaps his collar is turned up. Now imagine this man behaving the same way after someone touches the finish on his Corvette. You are the geek equivalent of that guy.
- Calamitous 17y agoExcept Mr. Polo doesn't have to spend ten hours a day staring straight into his car's finish.
- jcdreads 17y agoThe only proper response is to touch their glasses, leaving an identical smudge there.
- andrewljohnson 17y agoWell, my girlfriend and co-founder flips out whenever I touch her monitor. I understand where she's coming from, and we're still together, so you can probably get away with warding off your co-workers paws. This assumes of course that they don't harbor some secret dislike for you, such that your complaints might touch off an avalanche of retribution that leaves you jobless, homeless, and pariahed by society at large.
- mhb 17y agoRelated but tougher: s/coworker/other people's kids/ s/laptop screen/your house/ s/coworker's finger/food/
- kentbrew 17y agoYeah, this makes me crazy, especially since it always seems to be the clueless project managers who touch my screen. Personally, I have long arms, big hands, and terrible close-up vision, so I approach other people's monitors very slowly, with the back of my pinkie, and really do my best not to touch the part of the computer that isn't supposed to be touched. Anything else is just rude; you are sticking your finger into the retina of the person who owns the machine.
- joechung 17y agoIt isn't rude for them to do it until after you tell them not to. So tell them to stop.
- sherrod 17y agoThis thread is really fascinating, ranging from the hilarious to the intelligent. I agree that touching isn't THAT big of a deal that you need to get all worked up. However, there are legitimate reasons for not touching people's screens. I have a screen with a matte display -- that's without the extremely glossy and reflective glass covering. If someone has even the shortest of short fingernails -- and most people do -- they're going to do some kind of damage to the rather sensitive, uncovered screen. I'm not about to go get a mirror -- other people call them glossy screens -- just to protect my screen from your projectile fingers. If I do touch a screen, which happens because like some person said, you don't always think about it, I make sure to touch with the pad of my finger and not the nail. And pens are a complete nofuckingway no matter what kind of screen it is. They will ruin any screen. You ever try to get ink out of a tiny indentation in a glass screen? Because you can't. It's happened to me. So in conclusion, if your screen isn't glass-covered and they're coming at it like an ICBM, definitely say something polite (Excuse me..., Please don't..., Umm...). But if your screen is protected and they're not using a pen/knife to point...let it go. Most screens are so bright you can't even see smudges.
- Calamitous 17y ago"can he touch my laptop screen?" Absolutely. As long as he doesn't mind losing the finger he touched it with. Of course, I'm assuming you meant with his finger...
- sharjeel 17y agoI usually say "Here, you can use the mouse to point at the screen" and then clean the smudge in front of them.
- kbaribeau 17y agoI think the problem with telling most people not to touch your screen is that often they don't see an alternative. So I always make sure I have a pen with me. If someone touches my screen, I usually just hand them my pen and say "Here, point with this". Not only do you avoid the finger-oil issues, but it's also more accurate.
- beefman 17y agoI used to clip a telescoping pointer on the edge of my CRT. Nowadays I just break your finger at the knuckle and say, <Moe>What's the matter with yooouu</Moe>.
- vl 17y agoIf somebody actually touches my screen while pointing at it I immediately say "Do not touch the screen!" It appears that people don't perceive it as rude and just continue pointing without touching.
- vnuk 17y agoI threaten them openly. Touch my screen again and I will hurt you. If they repeat the offense I snap them over the fingers. Worked in every company I was employed...
- cromulent 17y agoOK, at least I know it's not just me, even if it is trivial. Good points all around. I still think that some things are not for casual touching (camera lenses, laptop screens, TV screens, eyeglasses, mirrors, etc) but I get that the smudges don't bother some people at all, so it's not that they are being rude, just they aren't aligned with my personal peeves. My laptop is an important personal item, not that it has a pet name, just that it's something I use all day every day and chose carefully. Maybe like a bicycle couriers bike, or something. I make my living with it. Treat it with respect, please. Anyway, I find the smudges distracting. In the end, that's the thing. Obviously clients, prospects, and vice presidents get to touch it with impunity. Colleagues with pizza fingers will get cschep's prefix.
- bajanme 17y agoHaha! Pisses me off too, just like people that adjust my car stereo!