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> He also bought a new wardrobe and replaced his old worn out logo T-shirts and cargo shorts with clothes more appropriate for an adult. I think the problem ma
by amelius 8mo ago
> He also bought a new wardrobe and replaced his old worn out logo T-shirts and cargo shorts with clothes more appropriate for an adult.
I think the problem many __men__ have with that is that an "appropriate" wardrobe looks more uniform and less individualized, basically boring.
- iamacyborg 8mo agoI don’t think that’s particularly true. There’s a lot you can do with texture, colours and silhouettes, even within items that are “the same”. I do think most men are pretty unimaginative when it comes to dressing themselves though, and most can’t even do basic things like getting trousers hemmed to fit them properly.
- gcanyon 8mo agoNever forget the Australian newscaster who wore the same suit for a year and no one noticed/called him out for it. His broadcasting partner, a woman, had been called out for wearing the same outfit previously. There may be subtle variations available to men, but the simple fact is that many fewer people notice or care. https://www.bbc.com/news/newsbeat-30069564 https://www.bbc.com/news/newsbeat-30069564
- iamacyborg 8mo ago> There may be subtle variations available to men, but the simple fact is that many fewer people notice or care. I wouldn’t say that’s the takeaway, even with a simple navy suit you have a lot of options. What that article does do though is highlight just how low the bar is for men to dress.
- taeric 8mo agoWhile I can kind of see what you are aiming at, a basic button down and clean pants go a long way. Keep it ironed and clean, and you go even further. No need for the anything that looks like a uniform.
- nemomarx 8mo agoMen's fashion is a little boring, but there's a lot you can play with in terms of fabric and accessories within it anyway. Men's wear blogs are kinda interesting
- ghaff 8mo agoAnd you can usually tell the difference between a tailored suit and something ill-fitting.
- amelius 8mo agoI find that buttoned shirts only work if your belly is flat, so you can wear it in your pants. With even a tiny bit of belly fat, ime it is better to just wear a t-shirt and not wear it in your pants.
- throwaway173738 8mo agoWear braces under your suit, and shirt garters. The combination keeps your pants and shirt exactly where you want them.
- amelius 8mo agoThanks. It looks uncomfortable though and it seriously makes me wonder if there isn't a better way of keeping a shirt in place.
- throwaway173738 8mo agoShirt garters aren’t uncomfortable. I wear them with suits all the time. The other way to do it is to never lift your arms over your head or bend over at all.
- evilduck 8mo agoI don't think this is true, but you won't be able to just grab a shirt off the rack and rock it. Look at Penn Jillette when he was larger, as an example. He was always dressed to the nines. He also strategically incorporated vests into his wardrobe too. Depending on your shape, a simple undershirt might be slimming enough, or adding shirt stays or shirt garters might help. Worst case you will have to get it tailored. A tshirt is obviously cheaper and easier though, but that signals something.
- relaxing 8mo agoOnly if your idea of personality is expressed through a logo tshirt.
- red-iron-pine 8mo agoOnly if your idea of personality is expressed through a textured fabric
- jimbokun 8mo agoWell yes. Both of those choices express a lot.
- Aurornis 8mo agoThe key point in his change was that he started looking like someone who cared enough to put some minimal effort into dressing himself. It’s not about being uniform or bland. He went from old worn-out clothes he didn’t care about to wearing clothes that were appropriate for a business casual environment or a casual date. When you start dressing like you care, regardless of how unique and individualized, others notice.
- usrusr 8mo agoIt goes a little deeper than "does not care" though: worn out can also be a symptom of caring a lot. Caring in the way of having a strong desire to identify with the stuff worn, and newly bought stuff just not checking that box. Then any newly procured garb, no matter how carefully selected, perhaps even customized, will feel like being dressed up as someone else. It's like a trap, just not being wired for new clothes. I wonder if there's a connection to childhood dress-up play, as in kids who had good times masquerading as some archetype are less likely later in life to fall into that "that's-not-me" trap regarding new clothes.
- galleywest200 8mo agoI wonder how clean the clothes looked, however. Clothes can be well worn but still appear clean and taken care of. There is a difference between "this is my favorite shirt" and "these are my grubbies I use while cleaning the house".
- evilduck 8mo agoIt's caring about the wrong thing if you're looking to improve your life though. You need to logically reason through norms and expectations and realize you gotta put on the correct costume for the setting, even if you don't identify with it. Otherwise "Thats not me" will be describing things like "successful career" and "romantic relationships".
- amelius 8mo agoI think many men look at clothes like the wrapping paper of a gift. They absolutely don't care what a gift comes wrapped in, it's the content that matters. Choosing wrapping paper or even thinking about it is boring as hell. So they then project themselves onto women, and are then surprised that expectations are different.
- ghaff 8mo agoFor many years in large corporations, pretty much the only acceptable dress was white shirt, tie, dark suit, and dress shoes. We were still wearing something like that at. trade shows into the 1990s before things started loosening up. (Mildly funny story. One big, probably Unix, show the IBM staff showed in logoed polos and suddenly everyone else is like If IBM doesn’t need suits we sure don’t.)
- mikrl 8mo agoI started dressing nice at work, reasoning that looking sharp would buy me a few seconds or minutes of grace to allow my social deficiencies to catch up - just in case an executive decided to ask me a question. Of course, that never happened for months, years until the one day I went in wearing cargo pants and a gothy synth band shirt and was greeted by a delegation of executives from out of town engaging everyone in small talk…
- ghaff 8mo agoI worked for a downtown firm for a while which loosened up dress code a little bit so I didn’t always wear my jacket in—though cargo pants and rock T would definitely have led to an HR meeting. One day I had to borrow a jacket from someone when I had to go to a nearby studio for a TV interview:-)
- magiclaw 8mo agoI guess it all depends on the type of women you're trying to attract. I'm married and have kids, so old worn out logo t-shirts and cargo shorts sound nice and comfortable to me, in most everyday situations. I'll dress appropriate for the circumstance.
- 9rx 8mo agoIsn't that the point of "appropriateness"? To define what allows one to be boring and disappear into the wallpaper for those who prefer to live that way. Those who want to stand out will define what is appropriate for themselves.
- windward 8mo agoPC said logo T-shirt and cargo shorts because they are so un-individual that they have become cliche.
- jimbokun 8mo agoAnd most women are going to prefer that over the worn out logo Ts. I mean if you want to go beyond that and have a more distinctive look go for it!