6 ms·

I'm approaching midlife and noticing the quality of my sleep has declined. I can't sleep in anymore. Sometimes I'm waking up in the middle of the night occasion

I'm approaching midlife and noticing the quality of my sleep has declined. I can't sleep in anymore. Sometimes I'm waking up in the middle of the night occasionally and something I'm wide awake because I'm thinking about work or something like that. Very frustrating. Another reminder to try to pull myself away from the screens late at night.

The28thDuck 2y ago
Sorry to hear that! I hope your sleep quality improves. :)
moffkalast 2y ago
Have you tried afternoon naps to compensate? I remember reading this theory a while back that we sort of naturally switch to a different sleeping cycle over the course of our lives, where older people tend to stay awake at night and sleep during the day as a sort of evolved way to split shifts for camp defence during the tribal era. No idea if there's any solid data to back it up though.
prettyStandard 2y ago
I've also found it's hard to sleep in, I recommend going to sleep sooner. It's like I'm hardwired to wake up at a certain time, the only thing I can control is when I go to bed.
- stavros 2y ago
  Yeah, same here. I'll wake up at noon, no matter what time I go to bed. If I go to bed at 2, I'll have ten hours of sleep, if at 6... You get the idea. Now all I need is to have fewer interesting hobbies and builds at night.
konfusinomicon 2y ago
ahh the old 3am ruminating toss and turn never fails to put me back asleep a half hour before my alarm goes off and mostly never closer to solving the problem at hand
jasonfarnon 2y ago
I noticed that too, but assumed it is a natural part of the body being in stasis and no longer growing/developing. I definitely remember being most tired during teenage years and other phases when the body was changing. You and others seem to imply that it has to be with increased stress, and maybe so, but I would like to see data on other cultures. Does someone who has been farming since age 17 have the same sleep patterns in middle age?
pedalpete 2y ago
There is a natural reduction in sleep quality as we age. This is related to the decline of health in aging.
eastbound 2y ago
I thought work stress kept me awake at night, but it was sleep apnea. I had a device that propels the lower jaw forward, to clear the throat, it stopped apnea but moved my teeth, but I then was brave enough to lose ~5kg (sleeping more makes you brave), and now I don’t need the jaw device.
graeme 2y ago
Two low impact things to try are: * A very small amount of melatonin. .300 to .500 mg. * Breathe right strips, these increase airflow Other health issues can also cause wakefulness.
- flakiness 2y ago
  Don't forget: Try pausing caffeine intake.
  - nomel 2y ago
    At least 8 hours before sleep [1]. [1] https://www.sleepfoundation.org/nutrition/caffeine-and-sleep#:~:text=How%20Many%20Hours%20Before%20Bedtime,may%20help%20minimize%20sleep%20problems https://www.sleepfoundation.org/nutrition/caffeine-and-sleep....
- corysama 2y ago
  1 mg sublingual (dissolve under the tongue) melatonin works for me. I find it works best if I wait until I'm well settled in and should be asleep, but aren't. That's the time to quietly pop the tablet so it nudges me over the edge. Biggest problem is that 1mg sublingual is hard to find. Walgreens/CVS is excited to sell you 5, 10 even 20 mg pills and gummies. But, those are so strong they are counter-productive.
  - loco5niner 2y ago
    Have you found somewhere else to get it?
    - nowandlater 2y ago
      I get the lowest dose and then break them up. Not precise, but if you get a 2-2.5 mg pill, it's pretty ok.
- euroderf 2y ago
  Melatonin gave me nightmares. So, YMMV.
schaefer 2y ago
what works for me in this case is to pop in a single ear bud and turn on an audio book I've already listened to. because there is a narrative, it shuts down rumination. because there's nothing novel, my brain is quite happy to drift off to escape the tedium.
- marknutter 2y ago
  My god, this is not only exactly what I've done for years, but you described it in exactly the same way I describe it when telling people about it, almost word for word.
deafpolygon 2y ago
My issue is I seem somehow wired to wake up early. I sleep better when I go to bed earlier. Screen use seems to have nearly no impact on my sleep, and what has the most impact is the type of screen usage (i.e. reading news, books & watching film is fine, but instagram/tiktok before bed tends to lead to worse sleep for me).
timack 2y ago
Moving my phone from beside my bed to across the room dramatically improved my sleep quality.
ajma 2y ago
I started exercising (a lot) in the year and found that has helped me fall asleep faster. It doesn't have to be a whole lot either. 30 minutes of jogging or fast walking is enough to do it for me. I definitely feel it on days where I sit and do nothing. I have a harder time falling asleep.
- nemonemo 2y ago
  I find a light exercise for extended duration of time right before sleep helps my sleep the best. The key for me seems not doing anything stressful right before sleep after the exercise, and drinking plenty of water but not food/sugar. I wonder blood sugar level is associated with some of the sleep problems.
ddyevf635372 2y ago
Taking a magnesium vitamin pill before sleep helps a lot. Try it out.
crossroadsguy 2y ago
Not there yet (or maybe I am, going by my country's average male lifespan), but after years of wondering what the fuck sometimes happens I finally realised what mostly causes sleep issues for me: - not getting rid of screens at least 30 mins before I hit the bed (60 is ideal) - not getting tired/exercise enough during the day - sleeping in the afternoon and anytime during the day more than 40-50 mins - having coffee after 4-5pm - having dinner after 8-830pm (though this is minor and I am not really sure it affects much) - and this is the biggest culprit of all (or maybe second worst - next to screen time): even though it's past my sleep time (1030pm) not actually just getting down on the bed and close my eyes and just try to relax even though it seems maybe I am not sleepy. This also applies if I wake up before my wake up time and I do not force myself to go back to sleep that is at least "kinda" pretend i.e just lie down closing my eyes. What helps: - reading myself to sleep (paper books are what I read, so not sure about e-readers) - hot chocolate (half glass) after dinner but 10-15 mins before hitting the bed - allergy medication (when it becomes unbearable for me) :D (no it's rare for me to take that and I don't take without asking my doctor) - listening to rain/thunder sound on my phone from a distance - if there are things pending or things bothering in my head → then heading to my ToDo list "TCOT" (abbr. for take care of this) in Reminders.app and log/dump it there before hitting the bed → I have noticed that those things usually do not bother me at night then (but I don't have much personal/anecdotal data on this either)
- bob_theslob646 2y ago
  >hot chocolate (half glass) after dinner but 10-15 mins before hitting the bed Could this not be a sugar shock helping you fall asleep?

The28thDuck 2y ago

Sorry to hear that! I hope your sleep quality improves. :)

moffkalast 2y ago

Have you tried afternoon naps to compensate? I remember reading this theory a while back that we sort of naturally switch to a different sleeping cycle over the course of our lives, where older people tend to stay awake at night and sleep during the day as a sort of evolved way to split shifts for camp defence during the tribal era. No idea if there's any solid data to back it up though.

prettyStandard 2y ago

I've also found it's hard to sleep in, I recommend going to sleep sooner. It's like I'm hardwired to wake up at a certain time, the only thing I can control is when I go to bed.

stavros 2y ago
Yeah, same here. I'll wake up at noon, no matter what time I go to bed. If I go to bed at 2, I'll have ten hours of sleep, if at 6... You get the idea. Now all I need is to have fewer interesting hobbies and builds at night.

konfusinomicon 2y ago

ahh the old 3am ruminating toss and turn never fails to put me back asleep a half hour before my alarm goes off and mostly never closer to solving the problem at hand

jasonfarnon 2y ago

I noticed that too, but assumed it is a natural part of the body being in stasis and no longer growing/developing. I definitely remember being most tired during teenage years and other phases when the body was changing. You and others seem to imply that it has to be with increased stress, and maybe so, but I would like to see data on other cultures. Does someone who has been farming since age 17 have the same sleep patterns in middle age?

pedalpete 2y ago

There is a natural reduction in sleep quality as we age. This is related to the decline of health in aging.

eastbound 2y ago

I thought work stress kept me awake at night, but it was sleep apnea. I had a device that propels the lower jaw forward, to clear the throat, it stopped apnea but moved my teeth, but I then was brave enough to lose ~5kg (sleeping more makes you brave), and now I don’t need the jaw device.

graeme 2y ago

Two low impact things to try are: * A very small amount of melatonin. .300 to .500 mg. * Breathe right strips, these increase airflow Other health issues can also cause wakefulness.

flakiness 2y ago
Don't forget: Try pausing caffeine intake.
- nomel 2y ago
  At least 8 hours before sleep [1]. [1] https://www.sleepfoundation.org/nutrition/caffeine-and-sleep#:~:text=How%20Many%20Hours%20Before%20Bedtime,may%20help%20minimize%20sleep%20problems https://www.sleepfoundation.org/nutrition/caffeine-and-sleep....
corysama 2y ago
1 mg sublingual (dissolve under the tongue) melatonin works for me. I find it works best if I wait until I'm well settled in and should be asleep, but aren't. That's the time to quietly pop the tablet so it nudges me over the edge. Biggest problem is that 1mg sublingual is hard to find. Walgreens/CVS is excited to sell you 5, 10 even 20 mg pills and gummies. But, those are so strong they are counter-productive.
- loco5niner 2y ago
  Have you found somewhere else to get it?
  - nowandlater 2y ago
    I get the lowest dose and then break them up. Not precise, but if you get a 2-2.5 mg pill, it's pretty ok.
euroderf 2y ago
Melatonin gave me nightmares. So, YMMV.

schaefer 2y ago

what works for me in this case is to pop in a single ear bud and turn on an audio book I've already listened to. because there is a narrative, it shuts down rumination. because there's nothing novel, my brain is quite happy to drift off to escape the tedium.

marknutter 2y ago
My god, this is not only exactly what I've done for years, but you described it in exactly the same way I describe it when telling people about it, almost word for word.

deafpolygon 2y ago

My issue is I seem somehow wired to wake up early. I sleep better when I go to bed earlier. Screen use seems to have nearly no impact on my sleep, and what has the most impact is the type of screen usage (i.e. reading news, books & watching film is fine, but instagram/tiktok before bed tends to lead to worse sleep for me).

timack 2y ago

Moving my phone from beside my bed to across the room dramatically improved my sleep quality.

ajma 2y ago

I started exercising (a lot) in the year and found that has helped me fall asleep faster. It doesn't have to be a whole lot either. 30 minutes of jogging or fast walking is enough to do it for me. I definitely feel it on days where I sit and do nothing. I have a harder time falling asleep.

nemonemo 2y ago
I find a light exercise for extended duration of time right before sleep helps my sleep the best. The key for me seems not doing anything stressful right before sleep after the exercise, and drinking plenty of water but not food/sugar. I wonder blood sugar level is associated with some of the sleep problems.

ddyevf635372 2y ago

Taking a magnesium vitamin pill before sleep helps a lot. Try it out.

crossroadsguy 2y ago

Not there yet (or maybe I am, going by my country's average male lifespan), but after years of wondering what the fuck sometimes happens I finally realised what mostly causes sleep issues for me: - not getting rid of screens at least 30 mins before I hit the bed (60 is ideal) - not getting tired/exercise enough during the day - sleeping in the afternoon and anytime during the day more than 40-50 mins - having coffee after 4-5pm - having dinner after 8-830pm (though this is minor and I am not really sure it affects much) - and this is the biggest culprit of all (or maybe second worst - next to screen time): even though it's past my sleep time (1030pm) not actually just getting down on the bed and close my eyes and just try to relax even though it seems maybe I am not sleepy. This also applies if I wake up before my wake up time and I do not force myself to go back to sleep that is at least "kinda" pretend i.e just lie down closing my eyes. What helps: - reading myself to sleep (paper books are what I read, so not sure about e-readers) - hot chocolate (half glass) after dinner but 10-15 mins before hitting the bed - allergy medication (when it becomes unbearable for me) :D (no it's rare for me to take that and I don't take without asking my doctor) - listening to rain/thunder sound on my phone from a distance - if there are things pending or things bothering in my head → then heading to my ToDo list "TCOT" (abbr. for take care of this) in Reminders.app and log/dump it there before hitting the bed → I have noticed that those things usually do not bother me at night then (but I don't have much personal/anecdotal data on this either)

bob_theslob646 2y ago
>hot chocolate (half glass) after dinner but 10-15 mins before hitting the bed Could this not be a sugar shock helping you fall asleep?