My oldest son has special needs. He's 2e -- gifted and learning disabled -- and has a serious medical condition associated with being very underweight. I put h

My oldest son has special needs. He's 2e -- gifted and learning disabled -- and has a serious medical condition associated with being very underweight. I put him in preschool to get him to talk. He could use sentences but wasn't. At the start of kindergarten, first, second and third grade, I spoke with the teacher, explained he was difficult, let them know I welcomed communication on any issue. They were thrilled and relieved. Parents are often part of the problem. By fourth grade, my son was no longer obviously "the weird kid." That teacher reported me to the social worker for letting him know up front my child was difficult and please don't hesitate to discuss things with me. The social worker called me, we talked for a bit. She knew both my kids. Laughed it off as a silly misunderstanding. Months later, his teacher let me know he did eventually get the memo that my child had quirky interpretations of social things. After my son finally got a proper diagnosis for his medical issue, he gained twenty pounds in one year and this did wonders for his social skills. Then he lost five pounds. He still felt better than he ever had and neither of us were concerned. His medical team implied I was in danger of being reported to children's services as an abusive mother. Because his condition predisposes people to being very underweight, pediatric clinics for the condition routinely include a dietitian and yet the standard recommended diet is "junk food" because it's high salt, high fat, high calorie and cheap. I had not been feeding him junk food, but I dutifully put a big bowl of snacks in the middle of the coffee table. He regained 2.5 pounds, they decided that was adequate and didn't need more follow up visits. We got home and, with no longer being under threat of being turned in as a neglectful or abusive parent, the first thing he did was hand me the bowl and tell me "We are never doing this again. I feel terrible!" We resumed feeding him a high quality diet in line with the high fat, high salt, high calorie recommendations. It's awful to be so protective of your children and be accused of abusing them based on no real evidence. I wish this project well.