4 ms·

Suggesting McDonalds is only half the insight - and contextual, anyway. Instead, give an arbitrary binary choice. "Would you like tacos or sushi?" will often e

Suggesting McDonalds is only half the insight - and contextual, anyway. Instead, give an arbitrary binary choice. "Would you like tacos or sushi?" will often elicit (1) a choice or (2) a third option ("I kind of want a burger"), which is now the default. A binary choice gets you to a default.

Aerroon 6y ago
If you can't decide between two options then take out a coin. Heads you get a burger, tails you get tacos. Flip the coin. If you feel even a tinge of regret or disappointment over the result, then go with the other option. Being faced with a specific concrete option can make it easier to rank it compared to alternatives. I learned of this idea from a TED talk many years ago.
- shannongreen 6y ago
  Whenever you're called on to make up your mind, and you're hampered by not having any, the best way to solve the dilemma, you'll find, is simply by spinning a penny. No - not so that chance shall decide the affair while you're passively standing there moping; but the moment the penny is up in the air, you suddenly know what you're hoping. -- Piet Hein, "A Psychological Tip"
  - kristiandupont 6y ago
    Hah, interesting. I knew it from Frasier: https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=173&v=pPYiCw9HHXo&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=173&v=pPYiCw9HHXo&feature=yo...
- harry8 6y ago
  It's a great technique. I've been doing it since the 90s. Also to break others out of indecision. But side note: I've found TED really disappointing. For a good talk save yourself the time and read the 5 sentences above. Most aren't that good. Anyone take issue with that?
  - wombatmobile 6y ago
    > I've found TED really disappointing This suggests a consistency of quality among TED talks that I hadn't noticed before. I like some and not others. This is one of my favourites. The last time I linked to it on HN nobody liked it but I didn't feel rejected. I felt special. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zeDt9dgFXFk https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zeDt9dgFXFk
    - sjcsjc 6y ago
      I liked it. Thanks.
  - peteretep 6y ago
    Great ones are great but there is the most incredible amount of dross.
  - tsjq 6y ago
    I agree. I feel many talks are selling their books, adding a lot of fluff around the core point and making it a TED Talk. Would be great to have a blog that's entirely TLDW of Ted Talks
  - Aerroon 6y ago
    I think TED talks used to be better. Perhaps it's nostalgia, but I really enjoyed TED talks in the past. Martin Rees talking cosmology, Richard Dawkins talking about why the universe seems so strange, James Flynn talking about the Flynn effect[0], Barry Schwartz talking about the paradox of choice etc are enjoyable to me even today. There are many others, but I've not enjoyed as many in the recent years. [0] https://youtu.be/9vpqilhW9uI https://youtu.be/9vpqilhW9uI
- sjcsjc 6y ago
  I do this and it works. I had thought it was my own idea but now you've got me wondering if I heard it from somewhere, possibly the TED talk you're referring to.
- peteretep 6y ago
  Hahah, I used to do something very similar as a kid, and my parents called me out on it. Having narrowed down my options, I'd announce out loud "I am going to have x". If I felt disappointed at that point, I'd revise it and have the other thing instead.
- GuB-42 6y ago
  Instead of flipping a coin, my default choice is to go for the cheapest, even if it is just one cent. Not that I can't afford the more expensive option, but it is an arbitrary criteria that has the side effect of possibly saving money.
corey_moncure 6y ago
This is how I've learned to negotiate with my 2 and 3 year olds when they are being intractable and rebellious. They don't like the idea of whatever I'm offering them for some reason, but getting them to admit they want "grapes" more than "apples" is enough of a concession that it makes a kind of consensus.
- ARandomerDude 6y ago
  > negotiate with my 2 and 3 year olds when they are being intractable and rebellious No thanks. It's better say "eat your apples" than to allow them to be disrespectful to their parents.
  - triceratops 6y ago
    Inorite? Never negotiate with terrorists /s
  - wahern 6y ago
    I like to say "eat it or I'll beat you purple", loudly and in a crowded restaurant. Then my son and I laugh about it later. A routine we started when he was 4- or 5-years-old after we both watched an old episode of Gunsmoke, "Harper's Blood", where a dying mother enjoined the father to strictly discipline their two boys, worried that one of them might grow up to be like her grandfather, whom she reveals to have been an infamous, murderous outlaw. After the mother dies the erstwhile gentle father steels himself, promising his sons that if they ever disobey him or get into any mischief he'll beat them purple.
  - hshshs2 6y ago
    granting children a small slice of agency isn’t disrespect
  - leetcrew 6y ago
    obedience is not the same as respect. a child who is merely obedient will only follow the rules when there is a plausible means of enforcement.
patcon 6y ago
Oh..! Interesting, but I think there are very different outcomes with leaning on either (1) "earnest A or earnest B" vs (2) "bad C" (McDonalds Theory)... The McDonalds Theory doesn't attempt to control or guide the decision. It maximally liberates others to shape it. It invites serendipity, from the POV of the prompter. It doesn't assume the poser of the question has any special knowledge or expertise with which they wish to shape the choice landscape. But "A or B" can very easily (and perhaps unintentionally) guide and take control of the choice. Its usage can easily become a "dark pattern" that collapses the possibility space onto one of two known trajectories (from the perspective of the prompter). If you WANT to take control, then "A or B" is great. But if you want to lazily invite collaborative ideas from the minds of others with the least effort or skill, then McDonalds Theory is much much better imho. To show my cards, I've realized I air toward the latter in my community organizing and facilitation work. Frankly, I believe we're all more likely to learn more about the world through McDonalds Theory framing, instead of getting stuck in local minima of "only what we can imagine" as leaders/supporters :) This stuff is all very relevant to facilitation practices! It's neat stuff to think through, so thanks for the opportunity to work through it out loud :)

Aerroon 6y ago

If you can't decide between two options then take out a coin. Heads you get a burger, tails you get tacos. Flip the coin. If you feel even a tinge of regret or disappointment over the result, then go with the other option. Being faced with a specific concrete option can make it easier to rank it compared to alternatives. I learned of this idea from a TED talk many years ago.

shannongreen 6y ago
Whenever you're called on to make up your mind, and you're hampered by not having any, the best way to solve the dilemma, you'll find, is simply by spinning a penny. No - not so that chance shall decide the affair while you're passively standing there moping; but the moment the penny is up in the air, you suddenly know what you're hoping. -- Piet Hein, "A Psychological Tip"
- kristiandupont 6y ago
  Hah, interesting. I knew it from Frasier: https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=173&v=pPYiCw9HHXo&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=173&v=pPYiCw9HHXo&feature=yo...
harry8 6y ago
It's a great technique. I've been doing it since the 90s. Also to break others out of indecision. But side note: I've found TED really disappointing. For a good talk save yourself the time and read the 5 sentences above. Most aren't that good. Anyone take issue with that?
- wombatmobile 6y ago
  > I've found TED really disappointing This suggests a consistency of quality among TED talks that I hadn't noticed before. I like some and not others. This is one of my favourites. The last time I linked to it on HN nobody liked it but I didn't feel rejected. I felt special. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zeDt9dgFXFk https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zeDt9dgFXFk
  - sjcsjc 6y ago
    I liked it. Thanks.
- peteretep 6y ago
  Great ones are great but there is the most incredible amount of dross.
- tsjq 6y ago
  I agree. I feel many talks are selling their books, adding a lot of fluff around the core point and making it a TED Talk. Would be great to have a blog that's entirely TLDW of Ted Talks
- Aerroon 6y ago
  I think TED talks used to be better. Perhaps it's nostalgia, but I really enjoyed TED talks in the past. Martin Rees talking cosmology, Richard Dawkins talking about why the universe seems so strange, James Flynn talking about the Flynn effect[0], Barry Schwartz talking about the paradox of choice etc are enjoyable to me even today. There are many others, but I've not enjoyed as many in the recent years. [0] https://youtu.be/9vpqilhW9uI https://youtu.be/9vpqilhW9uI
sjcsjc 6y ago
I do this and it works. I had thought it was my own idea but now you've got me wondering if I heard it from somewhere, possibly the TED talk you're referring to.
peteretep 6y ago
Hahah, I used to do something very similar as a kid, and my parents called me out on it. Having narrowed down my options, I'd announce out loud "I am going to have x". If I felt disappointed at that point, I'd revise it and have the other thing instead.
GuB-42 6y ago
Instead of flipping a coin, my default choice is to go for the cheapest, even if it is just one cent. Not that I can't afford the more expensive option, but it is an arbitrary criteria that has the side effect of possibly saving money.

corey_moncure 6y ago

This is how I've learned to negotiate with my 2 and 3 year olds when they are being intractable and rebellious. They don't like the idea of whatever I'm offering them for some reason, but getting them to admit they want "grapes" more than "apples" is enough of a concession that it makes a kind of consensus.

ARandomerDude 6y ago
> negotiate with my 2 and 3 year olds when they are being intractable and rebellious No thanks. It's better say "eat your apples" than to allow them to be disrespectful to their parents.
- triceratops 6y ago
  Inorite? Never negotiate with terrorists /s
- wahern 6y ago
  I like to say "eat it or I'll beat you purple", loudly and in a crowded restaurant. Then my son and I laugh about it later. A routine we started when he was 4- or 5-years-old after we both watched an old episode of Gunsmoke, "Harper's Blood", where a dying mother enjoined the father to strictly discipline their two boys, worried that one of them might grow up to be like her grandfather, whom she reveals to have been an infamous, murderous outlaw. After the mother dies the erstwhile gentle father steels himself, promising his sons that if they ever disobey him or get into any mischief he'll beat them purple.
- hshshs2 6y ago
  granting children a small slice of agency isn’t disrespect
- leetcrew 6y ago
  obedience is not the same as respect. a child who is merely obedient will only follow the rules when there is a plausible means of enforcement.

patcon 6y ago

Oh..! Interesting, but I think there are very different outcomes with leaning on either (1) "earnest A or earnest B" vs (2) "bad C" (McDonalds Theory)... The McDonalds Theory doesn't attempt to control or guide the decision. It maximally liberates others to shape it. It invites serendipity, from the POV of the prompter. It doesn't assume the poser of the question has any special knowledge or expertise with which they wish to shape the choice landscape. But "A or B" can very easily (and perhaps unintentionally) guide and take control of the choice. Its usage can easily become a "dark pattern" that collapses the possibility space onto one of two known trajectories (from the perspective of the prompter). If you WANT to take control, then "A or B" is great. But if you want to lazily invite collaborative ideas from the minds of others with the least effort or skill, then McDonalds Theory is much much better imho. To show my cards, I've realized I air toward the latter in my community organizing and facilitation work. Frankly, I believe we're all more likely to learn more about the world through McDonalds Theory framing, instead of getting stuck in local minima of "only what we can imagine" as leaders/supporters :) This stuff is all very relevant to facilitation practices! It's neat stuff to think through, so thanks for the opportunity to work through it out loud :)