26 ms·

Things You're Allowed to Do

537 points by thesephist 6y ago

inglor_cz 6y ago
Oh, this speaks to me as well! Just like Mr. Cvitkovic, I grew up in a very frugal environment - out of necessity. But it took me a lot of time to realize, in my adulthood, that I can now afford some tradeoffs. Grocery delivery is big on my list. I hated, hated, hated going into malls to shop. So did my wife. So we switched to grocery delivery five or six years ago, and never looked back. And in Covid times, it is a double blessing. Of course, it is easy to "overcorrect" and start spending too much. That is part of the process of learning, after all.
avhon1 6y ago
> Treat fines like payments > e.g. park illegally and let yourself think of the (expected value of the) fine as a parking fee This doesn't seem like something you're "allowed" to do. Maybe more like "able" to do, in the sense that you can violate other laws, and maybe the payoff or the risk/reward ratio makes it worthwhile. My understanding of "allow" is that it means people will accept you doing something. The existence and enforcement (like fines) of rules that prohibit doing things seems exclusive to something being "allowed".
- Jtsummers 6y ago
  I did something like that in college a couple times. $10 fine for parking in the wrong spot on campus, only risk was being unable to register for a parking permit the next term if you didn't pay it off. It (on the few occasions I did it) beat the alternative of a 20- to 30-minute walk due to conflicting schedules (like having a medical appointment that got me to campus after most others had arrived). They'd only ticket once as long as the car was only there for 2-3 hours. Perfect for a class, drive to lunch, park properly after. Certainly not something to do frequently, and it wasn't illegal parking, it was just not permitted parking.
  - soperj 6y ago
    It's insane that any college would be set up in such a fashion that you'd have to drive to class. (Unless I'm misunderstanding this, and you're talking about driving to school?)
    - gen3 6y ago
      I would assume they lived off campus...
    - Jtsummers 6y ago
      I lived at home because it was cheaper (free other than yard work, housework, and doing my own laundry), campus was 3 or 4 miles away depending on which end I needed (and roads were just dangerous enough I wasn't going to cycle, tried it, didn't like the assholes throwing shit at me). Most students lived on campus, but many (including locals like me) lived off campus. But even those who lived on campus, the furthest dorms were where I'd have had to park on those mentioned days. I did that sometimes, but it really was a 20- to 30-minute walk depending on where I was going on campus because they decided a mile long parking lot made more sense than a parking deck (later built, after I graduated). Also it had a bus service, but it really only covered connecting the business school, psychology school, and main campus. The massive parking lot was not covered by the bus service, which didn't make sense.
      - soperj 6y ago
        ahh that makes more sense. Thought you were saying you were driving from one class to another.
        TylerE 6y ago
        That's not really that uncommon either. Lots of colleges have satelite campuses in addition to (now-landlocked) main campuses.
      - jgwil2 6y ago
        Is it a common experience for cyclists to have shit thrown at them?
- closeparen 6y ago
  In this context "you're allowed to" means "this didn't necessarily occur to you as part of the solution space, but it is." For example many programmers have it in their heads that their only two activities are writing production code and staring at/thinking about log output. Sometimes it's helpful to be reminded that you are "allowed" to write scripts to analyze log output. No one is worried that they will be punished for this. But a surprising number of programmers will stare down a programming-shaped problem and fail to put two and two together.
- TylerE 6y ago
  This is actually a well known thing in psychology. Instituting a fine can actually cause the undesired behavior to increase. E.g. daycare adds a late pickup fee, then it becomes, "Oh well, I can <get thing done> for $20" instead of something the parent feels really guilty about, thus actually INCREASING late pickups.
- kthejoker2 6y ago
  I worked at the college radio station located in the on campus student center, which also had a hotel attached. It was, like all campuses, annoying to find parking / work out transportation. Then one day I just needed to run get something, so I parked in the hotel loading zone. I ran into someone and chatted for about close to an hour and then, remembering where I parked, freaked out and ran outside. Car was still there, no problems. In true hacker fashion, I went and sat in the car and waited to see when someone would a campus metermaid would come along. They never did! And so for the next 2 years I parked there every day. In the end I did receive 6 $25 tickets and, ingloriously, I was towed once which cost me $250. Compared to a parking pass it was an absolute steal, and in true "things you're allowed to do" form, it helped me realize the risks of transgression are lower than you think.
spoonjim 6y ago
“Things you’re allowed to do if you’re rich.”
- mhartl 6y ago
  This point is explicitly addressed in the post: I haven’t tried everything on this list, mainly due to cost. But you’d be surprised how cheap most of the things on this list are (especially the free ones).
- nsajko 6y ago
  There certainly is something weird about the relation of the title of the blog post to its content: the content is mostly about services, a lot of which seem quite costly. I'm not saying the post doesn't make sense, but it would be good if the author added a background/motivation to it. Or maybe just if they didn't use the word "allowed".
- dehrmann 6y ago
  Maybe if you try to do all those things, but a lot of these are options for the upper middle class. It'd be rich people if it said "fly in a private jet."
  - rzzzt 6y ago
    Private jets can be surprisingly cheap if you are sharing it with 200 other people and fly to the same destination.
- graeme 6y ago
  I did a lot of those in my first couple years of business when I had almost no money. Most of them aren’t especially expensive.
zoba 6y ago
"Engage a human productivity monitor - I know two people who have hired people to sit next to them or frequently contact them to keep them on-task" Shameless plug: if you're looking for a productivity monitor I can (personally) help: https://coding-pal.com/ https://coding-pal.com/
- iandanforth 6y ago
  Or for simple human presence as forcing function https://focusmate.com https://focusmate.com
  - mwcvitkovic 6y ago
    Author here: thanks! Added these.
jsmo 6y ago
"Choose your own adventure" :)
deleted 6y ago
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nsajko 6y ago
> park illegally and let yourself think of the (expected value of the) fine as a parking fee It seems that (in San Francisco) it can be cheaper to pay the ticket fines than pay for the parking upfront like one is supposed to do: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24796412 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24796412
- johnisgood 6y ago
  Genius. :D
- deleted 6y ago
  [deleted]
EamonnMR 6y ago
> Tape over annoying LED lights Also yet another use for BluTac
- justinlloyd 6y ago
  I have specifically taken devices apart to disable the LED inside. I also either put gaffer tape or black tape over the logos or use an angle grinder to clean them off.
  - nullc 6y ago
    I also remove logos and go out of my way to avoid buying things that have obnoxious not-obviously removable logos. My home is not a billboard for your products, thank you very much.
eyelidlessness 6y ago
An astonishing amount of this list amounts to “spend money”, so while these things may play well here I think it’s worth pointing out that a large majority of the population is not allowed to do those things because they can’t afford to.
- imgabe 6y ago
  Psst - you are also allowed to make more money.
- flyGuyOnTheSly 6y ago
  You're allowed to save money for a future goal.
  - eyelidlessness 6y ago
    I have. I’m also allowed to recognize that most people don’t have that luxury.
    - onecommentman 6y ago
      Median household income in US is $68K (2019) https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-economy-census-idUSKBN2662EY https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-economy-census-idUSKB... Median mortgage payment is $1550/mo. 40% of US homes are free of mortgage. https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/average-mortgage-payment?op=1 https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/average-mor... https://www.forbes.com/sites/brendarichardson/2019/07/26/nearly-40-of-homes-in-the-us-are-free-and-clear-of-a-mortgage/?sh=77ebca0447c2 https://www.forbes.com/sites/brendarichardson/2019/07/26/nea... There are a lot of folks in the US that are just scraping by. There are a lot more folks with enough disposable income to pursue one of these strategies. Not everybody. [And this doesn’t include wealth and savings.]
      - fsflover 6y ago
        The parent did not say "in the US".
emeraldd 6y ago
> Actually turn the heat/AC on I live in Texas, a good chunk of the year, it would be nuts to try to live without A/C (We're not quite Death Valley, but it can get pretty hot here ...). So, I'd amend that one to: "Open the windows and turn off the A/C" I really like the few months a year where I can do this and not get cooked!
jclulow 6y ago
> Buy goods/services from your friends Certainly you are _allowed_ -- but if it's for an economically meaningful service, like renting an apartment, the follow-on suggestion that it's "only weird if you make it weird" really fails to capture how likely it is that it _will_ change the nature of your relationship as soon as someone decides not to pay, or whatever other irreconcilable issue comes up. Just be careful when going into business in any way with people you otherwise like.
- em-bee 6y ago
  someone once summed his experiece that he should have followed the advice to make friends through business but don't make business with friends.
- justatdotin 6y ago
  given All This Shit (2020), I've been going out of my way to buy goods and services from friends who are feeling the economic impact
- mwcvitkovic 6y ago
  Author here: great point, I updated the post
blt 6y ago
> Treat fines like payments. e.g. park illegally and let yourself think of the (expected value of the) fine as a parking fee This is why all fine-based penalties should scale progressively with income.
- ehwhyreally 6y ago
  I remember I got a new job just outside of the city, my first day I got 3 fines for parking within 3 meters of a postbox, There was no yellow lines to say you could not nor was it signed. they fined me every 2 hours. cost me $1400 AUD. I never even knew this was a thing. I lived the next 3 weeks on soup. welcome to the city.
  - dfcowell 6y ago
    This is another entry for the “things you can do” list... Contest unjust fines. I’ve received 4 parking fines in my life, all were for parking somewhere that had no signage or had signage that permitted my behaviour. All 4 were successfully contested with photo evidence and a minimum of fuss.
    - imgabe 6y ago
      You can also contest just fines. In the US fines are used as an undemocratic, regressive tax to raise extra revenue for the government. Everyone should contest every fine so they are unprofitable.
      - deleted 6y ago
        [deleted]
    - sixstringtheory 6y ago
      It definitely never hurts to ask. I recently, very absent mindedly, parked in a disabled parking spot and got a $250 fine. Wrote in with my sob story and that I truly do care about this kind of thing, was only there for ten minutes during which time several of the adjacent spots were open, and of course I’m willing to pay the fine as those are the rules... they forgive the whole amount. Not something I’d abuse, but second chances can be had.
AndrewKemendo 6y ago
This looks like an almost exact rehash of most of the advice from Tim Ferris' four hour work week. Basically: Outsource your personal life to accomplish things that you want to do. Ferris was using Brickwork India at the time if I recall. [1] https://www.brickworkindia.com/ https://www.brickworkindia.com/
- dougmwne 6y ago
  I think it's in that genre, but also has some fresh ideas. I actually really like this line of thinking. It seems "wrong" on the surface but really is just non-normative. If you can buy dinner for 2, you can also hire somone for a small job off fiver. One is seen as normal and the other as elitist and out of reach. I hired a genealogist once and absolutely got my money's worth and they were a world expert on records in that particular geography.
smitty1e 6y ago
It is still substantially true that the Internet is an autodidact's delight. There is so much excellent online content that, given a public library (beside the library itself) one can gather as much knowledge as one wants. Three other recommendations I give all youngsters: - stay sober - minimize debt - remain married
- moonchild 6y ago
  > remain married Is this such good advice? Relationships are hard work, and can be made (or mended) given sufficient effort. But sometimes, it just doesn't work and can't be made to.
  - fossuser 6y ago
    Yeah I think a better bullet would be “choose your SO carefully”. Most people seem to choose their SO for bad reasons and then stay in it due to sunk costs.
    - smitty1e 6y ago
      Also, it's a recommendation, not a rule. If your SO proves a sociopath, you may be forced into unfortunate measures.
      - fossuser 6y ago
        Maybe you got married young because you both thought each other were sexually attractive in high school and you were young and stupid. Turns out a year in you don’t have a lot in common. Should you stay together and have kids together because you made a stupid decision based on sex? Your partner doesn’t have to be a sociopath for someone to decide marriage was a mistake for both parties.
        smitty1e 6y ago
        It's a guideline, for external use. It can apply as well to a second round.
egypturnash 6y ago
* Modify your stuff * * Rotate your monitor to portrait ...and write a script to do this, along with rotating your drawing tablet to match (which may actually involve rotating it the other way depending on where the cable is and what works with your desk. Because poking around in the prefs with just one of monitor/tablet rotated is a major pain in the ass.
01000010x 6y ago
This is basically the book "The four hour workweek" by Thimothy Ferriss in a blog post
fossuser 6y ago
Asking obvious questions is one I’ve thought about. You learn a lot and make progress faster that way. I agree with most of the stuff in this list - they’re at least things to consider. https://zalberico.com/essay/2017/02/21/asking-questions.html https://zalberico.com/essay/2017/02/21/asking-questions.html
- Slaren 6y ago
  I am able to help you how you can find ways to help with your preparation, without specific difficulties and difficulties now, and then of course you have to refer to experts who can easily compose various essays and other works. See http://homework-writer.com/ http://homework-writer.com/ right now. Soon, people write complicated tasks, so that you can't think about the outcome. A lot of people are concerned about plagiarism, but there is no plagiarism in this area.
borishn 6y ago
> Follow up many times | You won’t make people mad if you’re polite. I am getting lots of emails from outsourcing companies. I ignore them. I find their follow up emails extremely frustrating. "Thanks for taking the time to read this email. After I sent my previous email (See below) I had put a reminder in to check-in with you to see how things were going with the need of a Data Engineering." Why should I care about your reminder?
- jrumbut 6y ago
  Presumably it would be less annoying if it was a highly specific request for something you are uniquely able to provide.
  - borishn 6y ago
    The first one is less annoying, but the follow-up nagging is infuriating.
- nicbou 6y ago
  Same thing with automated SEO outreach. It's getting really annoying.
ramraj07 6y ago
Is there any service which allows you to share a personal assistant among many people? I would love to offload many of my menial tasks but I don't have enough to cover the time of a decent assistant. And anyone who is okay with sitting with their twiddling thumbs turns out to be not that good!
- graeme 6y ago
  Upwork lets you hire people for stuff like this. Some people may have 2-5 clients.
- the_jeremy 6y ago
  While I agree with the sentiment, most of the tasks I want to offload involve PII that I would not want to give to some random person. I would love a personal assistant who is able to do things like that, but I haven't seen a good model for a trustworthy one that would be cheap enough that it would still be worth hiring out for.
  - ramraj07 6y ago
    Definitely not gonna hand over my tax returns but other than that, I'm not generally worried about it - granted they will still know reasonable amount of detail about me, that's the price you pay I suppose. Which is why I wasn't comfortable with fancyhands and other such services- I still want ONE person to handle my stuff, and have some ability to screen them for trustworthiness.
  - jrumbut 6y ago
    Yeah I've tried to work on this before and it falls apart on the PII part and also the need to explain the context of everything.
k__ 6y ago
My findings: Sleep until noon every day. Work only as much as you need. Work from home, or anywhere else for that matter. Have multiple romantic partners in parallel. Have platonic friends of the opposite sex. Share multiple flats with multiple people (i.e. live in multiple places, but cheap) Study 10 years. Make your own iced tea in the fridge. Buy food in bulk. Drink tap water. Create your own dishes by mixing ingredients. Cook/fry/bake food you would usually eat raw. Eat food raw that you would usually cook/fry/bake. Sleep everywhere in your home. Learn languages, instruments, or sports after you turned 30. Drink no alcohol at a party and still have fun. Start/stop smoking and drinking after 30. Found a company like you would buy a game console. Take no VC money. Take muliple years and tries to create a good product. Write music/give concerts for yourself or your friends only. Don't wear shoes outside. Don't have an opinion on a topic. Overall: Don't play pre-defined games in your life, but ask if they make you happy. You only have one life, make the most out of it. Sometimes you have to play by some rules made up by other people to get into a better place, but look at them closely, it could very well be that they are more open to interpretation than they first seem.
- renewiltord 6y ago
  If nothing else, it appears like you'll live an interesting life this way, though perhaps not a long one if you take the 'start' path on the smoking.
- Wened 6y ago
  > Sleep everywhere in your home To the window, to the wall.
- jtolmar 6y ago
  Having done a large chunk of this myself, I feel like I have to ask about this one: > Share multiple flats with multiple people (i.e. live in multiple places, but cheap) I've never even heard of people doing this. How does it work? What's it like? It sounds fascinating, and like something I should've tried in my 20s.
  - k__ 6y ago
andrewljohnson 6y ago
I doubt the marginal gains from sending followups on cold emails can make or break any business, it's rude, and it's mildly illegal. Maybe I'm just grumpy, but... if you send me a cold email, I'll either respond or delete it. Then, if the original didn't have an "unsubscribe" link, plus you follow up on it, I'll tell gmail to block you.
- k__ 6y ago
  I think it depends on the content. I gave advice to many people who cold emailed me. But in my personal experience, most cold emails I wrote wouldn't lead to much, because my inquiries were too specific.
- graeme 6y ago
  I did think cold email wasn’t the best example, as that tactic is overused. Though if it is extremely well targeted and personal it could make sense. However, one thing people don’t do often enough is follow up when the other person has expressed interest. This kind of followup is usually welcome, as inertia and distraction lead to things not happening. This is especially true in commercial context. Eg someone may express strong interest in buying, get busy, drift off, then enthusiastically buy when you ping them a bit later.
  - andrewljohnson 6y ago
    Agreed, I'll treat any followup where I've actually responded in any way like the person sending it is a real human with feelings.
iandanforth 6y ago
Some more that are free(ish): Pick from your spices at random when cooking and resolve to use whatever you get Schedule working sessions with remote coworkers where you share a zoom room but just work Shave your head and donate your hair Volunteer to speak with elderly (maybe by phone for now) and collect their life stories Learn who is building what in your neighbor hood (e.g. https://dbiweb02.sfgov.org/dbipts/ https://dbiweb02.sfgov.org/dbipts/) Picket things by yourself Find a big mud puddle and jump in it until you look like a monster Climb trees as an adult Play music on street corners Go to church and ask questions until you're asked to leave Knock on people's doors and introduce yourself Troll craigslist for free ceramics (plates dishes etc) and smash the heck out of them Take apart your toaster and put it back together again, don't stop until it works again
- aryamaan 6y ago
  > Take apart your toaster and put it back together again, don't stop until it works again I find entry interesting. But what happens if it short circuits. Are there any tests which we can do on things to know that before turning them on?
  - legerdemain 6y ago
    > don't stop until it works again
  - dkersten 6y ago
    > Are there any tests which we can do on things to know that before turning them on? Yes. Buy a cheap multimeter and test current flow on cables.
  - stdbrouw 6y ago
    If it short circuits, the circuit breaker on that circuit will open up and cut power within a couple of milliseconds, before anything has had a chance to catch fire. Though I definitely second the sibling comment about the multimeter.
    - 6y ago
renewiltord 6y ago
It's funny. His conclusion with the "life is cheap to save" was that he could save lives. Mine was that I don't care that much about the arbitrary life.
jbandela1 6y ago
> Surgery for appearance or comfort Be very careful about this. Surgery in the modern age is safe, but there is always a risk, whether from the surgery itself, the anesthesia, or from infection. Be sure that you are really sure that the benefits outweigh the risks.
deleted 6y ago
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forgotmypw17 6y ago
Live largely without using money. Minimalism, abstention, freganism, hand me downs, barter, begging, and luck. Make websites which work in any browser, including 25yo classics, in the spirit of the open web. Sleep without a schedule. Ditto kay on multiple parallel romantic partners, with a whole larger than the sum of the pieces. Travel somewhere without any lodging plans, only a sleeping bag. Think for yourself and don,t do unhealthy things even if they are normalized. This is a whole other list. Maintain your health and sanity as top priority over anything else. Abandon materialism and attachment. Harm no living being on purpose. Make friends with mammals, plants, insects. Meditate any time of day for any length of time as many times as see fit. Be effective and happy while doing all this. Tailor your own reality based on your intent. Not eat for 72 hours comfortably and be better off for it. Sadly, I am seemingly not allowed to have a reasonable Web browser with a view source button and unstupid address bar on a small form factor device. I,m looking, though...
- analognoise 6y ago
  I know it's supposed to sound whimsical and bohemian, but this advice sounds like the worst kind of hobo-Karen.
  - hungryforcodes 6y ago
    Actually I started living pretty much like this after my startup sold four years ago. I saw a dramatic increase in my happiness and life satisfaction. All my friends back home complain about how everyone seems so increasingly unhappy. Karen as I understand her is a prototypical suburban soccer mom. By definition she couldn't be bohemian. I'm not sure quite what is being said here.
    - benrbray 6y ago
      > Actually I started living pretty much like this after my startup sold four years ago. I saw a dramatic increase in my happiness and life satisfaction. Wow, all that's holding back my life satisfaction is a major windfall! Thanks for the useful tip.
idolaspecus 6y ago
Details aside, I think it’s good the point that you can (if you’re lucky) proactively engage with the world on your own terms. Anecdotally, as a new first time home owner I’ve been recently rediscovering this fact and it has been so immensely positive for my psyche. It’s like I was playing a game where the world was 99.9% closed off and now I’m part of reality again. Side note: this experience has also really opened my eyes to the importance and power of affordable home ownership.
legerdemain 6y ago
This list links to another one in the same spirit: "How to Trade Money and Time."[1] To be totally honest, all lists like these make me think of young male friends who went through a distinctive weird phase in their early 20s. For a period of 1-2 years, they would scour books ranging from self-help to moral philosophy in order to build a Simplistic System for Living. Maybe it had to do with getting their first engineer salaries, because a central tenet of my friends' philosophies somehow always ended up being "time and money are interchangeable." Of course, it is naive to think that just because many things can be bought, all things can be bought, at least reasonably. And as my friends got older and acquired adult responsibilities, families, roles in the local community, they dropped their philosophical regimen and just tuned into typical affluent suburbanites. But it's that glimmering realization that still strikes me as kind of fascinating to watch: "I can buy... things!... with money! That means I can buy... anything!" In particular, I'd love to know what exactly the person in the post I linked to was thinking when writing this sentence: > Spend more to go to events where you will meet exactly the people you want. Everything that comes to my mind feels either niche or unreliable. An expensive professional conference? You're either already part of that professional community, or going to an event like that is kind of a mixed bag. Paid dating services? Maybe I don't understand that world. A fancy party where you get to mingle with VCs? That's very specific. Are there meetups where the cost of attendance is a significant filter? My experience in this arena has been that you need serendipity, and it's hard to buy serendipity. [1] https://meteuphoric.com/2014/03/25/how-to-trade-money-and-time/ https://meteuphoric.com/2014/03/25/how-to-trade-money-and-ti...
- forgotmypw17 6y ago
  >For a period of 1-2 years, they would scour books ranging from self-help to moral philosophy in order to build a Simplistic System for Living. Maybe it had to do with getting their first engineer salaries, because a central tenet of my friends' philosophies somehow always ended up being "time and money are interchangeable." I went through this too. It,s a result of pressure to Do More, Faster, which comes with that engineer salary and long work weeks. You have 1-2 hours free per day, max, and feel an enormous pressure to do something worthwhile with that time. It,s chasing meaning while already having given away most of your time to build someone else,s meaning.
sellyme 6y ago
One time when I was younger, in my late teens, I was walking through the city around 8pm. I suddenly felt rather cold, and went through the typical 15 seconds of internal grumbling. I then had an epiphany, and walked into a nearby department store to purchase a jacket. Somehow I'd never even considered that as a possibility previously. As silly as it may seem, I use that singular point in time as the reference for when I commenced adulthood. I've got no idea if others have similar experiences (I grew up very poor, so I was probably primed against the idea of spontaneously buying something to begin with), but the contents of this list seems to be very much in the same vein.
- legerdemain 6y ago
  Nowadays, you'd probably just order one on your phone, and a drone would deliver it to you, and a taco.
- k__ 6y ago
  lol Reminds me of a time when I was in the city with a friend. My shoes were broken, so I said to him "I need new shoes" went in the next department store, bought a pair, threw my old ones in a trash can and wore the new shoes. He was mind-blown.
  - jaspax 6y ago
    Both this and OP depend crucially on the hidden assumption that you have enough money to buy new shoes or a jacket on a whim. Depending on where you are, what kind of store it is, and how much money you have, it may be practically impossible to carry this out. Of course, having a reasonable amount of cash on hand to enable immediate, necessary purchases is also a mark of adulthood (it means you have a decent job), so the story still works.
    - Jommi 6y ago
      Or they suddenly realized that the immediate need for the product tipped over the scale for a purchasing decision that normally would have waited X amount of time. It's not like it's an item bought for no reason at all. (Not to mention in both instances they could go and return the item the next day)
AnimalMuppet 6y ago
When a checkout clerk asks if you have a coupon, you can reply "No, but you can give me a discount if you want". That works maybe 5 or 10% of the time. To me, that's worth the 10 seconds to say it.
- qznc 6y ago
  Research says you might have more success with a "because" in there like "No, but you can give me a discount if you want because would appreciate to pay less."
jdkee 6y ago
Is HVAC duct cleaning necessary? The intake air ducts pre-filter can accumulate dust but that is what the filter is for. Post-filter ducts are filled with cleaned air flowing through them. What am I missing?
- Baeocystin 6y ago
  My neighbor owns his own HVAC company, and has told me straight out that it's a waste of money. FWIW.
- fingerlocks 6y ago
  Floor mounted egress ducts are often covered with vents that have quarter inch gaps between each vent slot. All sorts of crap can fall in there, especially if you have children and pets.
gautamcgoel 6y ago
Lol I shared an office with this guy in grad school. Yo Milan!
diehunde 6y ago
I would also add: - You are allowed to buy lunch/dinner as much as you want and not feel bad for not wanting to cook.
- tshibley 6y ago
  I mean, fair if you are already a millionaire, but otherwise it seems good to at least be aware of how powerful saving $20 a day in the long run can be before making this choice
  - woutr_be 6y ago
    As with everything, do it within reason. If you can't afford to buy lunch/dinner daily, obviously don't do it. But I think the point that the parent was trying to make was that if you don't feel like cooking one day, it's totally OK to go out for food. During my holiday this month, I've made it a point to go for a nice lunch every few days. Yes, it costs me money, money that I could save for my future (although I don't know what I would do with the extra money), but it's enjoyable, relaxing and the food is great.
  - deleted 6y ago
    [deleted]
- nicbou 6y ago
  Just be aware that it's rather expensive in the long run. Getting to the restaurant and ordering also costs time. Cooking is useful, rewarding and attractive. Eating out is better enjoyed occasionally.
  - AntiImperialis2 6y ago
    >Cooking is useful, rewarding and attractive. Not so much if you don't enjoy it. I love cooking occasionally. For example, I will spend a week trying to perfect a dish I just learned. I do it over and over everyday, trying different ways and failing until I make it great. But for most of the time, I'd rather not have to do it. >Just be aware that it's rather expensive in the long run. True. But if your time is valuable, it's much more expensive to have to spend all that time in the kitchen.
beefman 6y ago
A few of these things tend to empower. Most of them don't. What reliably empowers is: choose a skill and practice it constantly. So few people do this, it's a practically guaranteed route to financial, social, and intellectual security. Taking the time to do your own grocery shopping, or not, is a gating factor exactly never. Almost all other types of human activity are weak compared to the compounding action of just doing something all the time. In the short term, activities like complaining or optimizing random chores may seem stronger. But on timescales of years they're just noise. https://twitter.com/sama/status/1331256688998051844 https://twitter.com/sama/status/1331256688998051844
- kome 6y ago
  " A few of these things tend to empower. Most of them don't." I agree, but empowerment is for poor people. Just poor people have to learn a trade and have the skill in order to sell their workforce on the labor market. I have seen many rich entrepreneurs, that just buy those skills and set up successful business. Of course, they have some skill too: being able to buy they right resources is a skill, sort off.
  - deleted 6y ago
    [deleted]
onecommentman 6y ago
Thumbs up for personal trainer. For this community especially, there will come a time when sedentary starts to take its toll. For me, 35+. It is a royal pain in the rear to try to start a fitness program on your own and stick to it. Too many excuses and too likely to overdo it and either injure yourself or lose motivation. Enter the personal trainer. It took me 6 months of training to get over the hump and into a self-sustaining mode. 3 days/week for 26 weeks. You don’t need elite training. If you skip on a day, you are skipping on a person. They will ensure you stay safe and motivated. Worth every penny and pays dividends for decades. Split it with a friend and get the semiprivate rate.
jhanschoo 6y ago
> Give to charity It's really worth properly doing due diligence before you commit to the donation. And if you don't have a good cushion yourself, rationally speaking, chances are you should save it. Just earmark that amount to be willed to charity upon death or extraordinary loss.
lazyjones 6y ago
I learned to use computers to automate things instead of having to talk to people to get them to do menial tasks for me! More seriously, some good suggestions there that aren't too obvious, like hiring article authors as consultants instead of googling for professionals.
keiferski 6y ago
This reminds me of an old video of Steve Jobs. His idea is simple, but it's really powerful. In short: the world is something you can change, not merely participate in. When you grow up, you tend to get told that the world is the way it is and your life is just to live your life inside the world, try not to bash into the walls too much, try to have a nice family life, have fun, save a little money. That’s a very limited life. Life can be much broader, once you discover one simple fact, and that is that everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you. And you can change it, you can influence it, you can build your own things that other people can use. Once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again. And the minute that you understand that you can poke life and actually something will, you know if you push in, something will pop out the other side, that you can change it, you can mold it. That’s maybe the most important thing. It’s to shake off this erroneous notion that life is there and you’re just gonna live in it, versus embrace it, change it, improve it, make your mark upon it. I think that’s very important and however, you learn that, once you learn it, you’ll want to change life and make it better, cause it’s kind of messed up, in a lot of ways. Once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYfNvmF0Bqw https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYfNvmF0Bqw
- Ultcyber 6y ago
  while I like the idea expressed by the quote, I don't like the overall judgemental sentiment that "if you don't mold the world around you, you live a poor version of life". It reminds me of something that could be said by a cultist person coach. Nothing wrong or worse I think with living a simple life.
  - gonzo41 6y ago
    It's hard not to reflect on Steve Job's quotes like that and think about how Apple manufactures it's phones. What a reality they've created for the foxcon workers.
    - 0x10c0fe11ce 6y ago
      One could argue they’re just following local laws. Though it won’t make any difference because their brand carries such weight and status that I find it will be almost impossible to vote it out with our wallets. We’d better shut up and just accept the new truth from our self appointed feudal masters.
speculator14 6y ago
Only in the last couple years did I realize you could buy t shirts you like instead of just wearing giveaways you have accumulated.
Buttons840 6y ago
Here's mine: You're allowed to be productive in a sub-optimal programming language or library. Something my perfectionist self needs to hear.
mklepaczewski 6y ago
If you're procrastinating a lot I can highly recommend hiring someone to sit beside you and watch you. For me ROI was insane. 33%-50% more billable hours (currently at 5h/day), income after expenses rose by 50-66%. Nothing worked for me, to do lists, apps, pomodoro, organizers, calendars. But when someone watches me I just work. Every day I connect with that person at 9:00 AM sharp through Hangouts, share my screen and his webcam (I need to see the other person, I don't need to share mine for it to work on me) and we spend like this 8 hours a day. Unfortunately, focusmate didn't worked for me either, I'm such a good procrastinator that I was putting off making appointments ;).
- chordalkeyboard 6y ago
  Did this person agree to do this for free or are you paying to have an accountability partner?
  - mklepaczewski 6y ago
    I'm paying close to national minimum wage for it. I'm willing to pay more if that person becomes my personal assistant. I think you can find someone just like me (and possibly you) and have an agreement to connect every day for a whole work day and do it for free. But then there're two procrastinators quite happy to not connect for whatever silly reason, so watch out ;-)
- sebmellen 6y ago
  How do you find someone like this? It’a exactly what I’m looking for.
  - mklepaczewski 6y ago
    It's a family member, stay at home dad with kids still young enough that need to be watched over, but old enough that you just need to be there most of the time. I wanted to do this for a long time, but always thought that it might be expensive. Until one time my brother in law was on non-paid leave for two weeks and he was looking for anything to do. We decided to give it a go. Everyday he would sit beside me, watch Netflix for all day and just look at my screen from time to time. Productivity rose _instantly_. After a single day I was thrilled, after a week I was absolutely sure that I need to hire someone after he gets back to his old job. Some tips: the person you're going to hire must be somewhat cheeky. They must cut through your bs, force you to explain why you're on youtube, ask you if you really need that for your work etc. Furthermore, working side by side works better than through Hangouts, Skype and others. I have multiple displays and I've started to cheat the system as vast majority of screen share apps allow you to share single screen only. We're in process on finding an app that allows one to share all displays (you might need couple extra CPU cores if you have 4-5 displays).
acjohnson55 6y ago
I once missed an overnight bus in a developing country, which was going to result in the loss of a day at my destination. After sulking for a few minutes, I posed the idea that we offer to pay someone to drive us overnight, under the suspicion that this would be surprisingly affordable. Turns out, it was affordable, and we did it. It was, however, the scariest night of my life. I don't recommend doing this, but it was a lesson in what is possible, if I think outside the box.
- deleted 6y ago
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- Toutouxc 6y ago
  Did you pay a weird person or an exceptionally bad driver? I'm curious.
  - acjohnson55 6y ago
    Normal guy, but he didn't have the papers to drive out of his district, and so he was flooring it down the highway with lights off. We had to bribe several guards at checkpoints, and at one point, we were commandeered by paramilitary who wanted to hitch a ride to a different destination. The driver eventually managed to give them the boot, after much heated argument. We also had no common language with the driver, which added another layer to everything. It was an adventure!
nicbou 6y ago
In aggregate, paying for all those things might chip at your disposable income and tie you to a certain lifestyle. You are only good at two things: earning money at your job, and spending it. The whole system is based on how much money you make, and that variable can change unexpectedly. There is also a time cost to orchestrating all those services. Aligning schedules is not nearly as efficient as doing thr work yourself. I prefer the idea of working less, spending less, and learning to do things yourself. Getting your hands dirty gives you a better appreciation for the result. It makes life more interesting and leaves you with a more diversified skillset.
vmurthy 6y ago
Something that happened recently! (I am 35 :-o) : I was a frequent (~3-4 times a day , 5 mins each time) visitor to coupon sites [0] hoping to snag that elusive discount. It hit me that over the course of 1 year I might save ~$500 but I'd have to spend 30mins each day (so potentially 200 hours a year in time alone not to mention the context switching) to save ~$500. My time is worth >$2.5/hour isn't it? So, I now have consciously decided to save up the extra $500 for these sort of purchases. Totally worth it! [0] www.ozbargain.com.au
enriquto 6y ago
Basically a "rich people's guide to life". A bit depressing for those of us that cannot afford most of the things described here. No, I'm not actually allowed to do any of this because I don't have enough money; thanks. > park illegally and let yourself think of the (expected value of the) fine as a parking fee That one made me laugh out loud. Is it a serious document or a parody of sorts? Is it mocking a "rich" people's lifestyle?
- jstummbillig 6y ago
  No wait, I understand the instinct, but I feel this list is less about its specific items. To me it felt helpful as an encouragement to think different or anew about things. The naive "why?" Attitude is all over it. Let your mind wander. Try to look past the authors personal perspective and you might find something for yourself. I did.
hermitcrab 6y ago
>Sure you could proofread your own document. No you can't. You can't tickle yourself and you can't proof read stuff that you wrote. You will just read what you thought you wrote.
- AntiImperialis2 6y ago
  You can, if you wait long enough.
- Veen 6y ago
  You can but you have to use various tricks to make it work: - Play back what you've written with text-to-speech software. On a Mac, you can do this with the option-escape keyboard shortcut. - Read it out loud yourself, slowly. - Leave at least 24 hours between drafting and proofreading, longer if possible. - Print the text in a different font and proofread on paper, marking errors with a pen. - Use a "focus mode" that dims everything but the sentence you're proofreading. Read through each sentence slowly and deliberately. iA Writer can do this, as can a few other text editors. - Use tools like Grammarly, but consider what they say guidance rather than hard-and-fast rules. They are often wrong or have an overly narrow definition of correctness, but they will help you to catch typos and and errors such as repeated words. However, depending on time and money constraints, it's often more efficient to pay someone to do it for you.
deleted 6y ago
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LockAndLol 6y ago
I would like to hire a physicist (probably particle physicist) to write a paper about an idea I have for a battery. It would be really great to have a verdict on it with an in depth reason of "why" and "how". I have considered studying physics myself to answer the question (free education FTW), but won't have the time for another 3-4 years (unless I happen upon a hundred thousand euros or so to pay my living expenses during the 3-5 years of study). Paying an expert to do it seems reasonable. Do free lance researchers exist?
dredmorbius 6y ago
Some of these tips may backfire. Parking illegally may trigger a $25 fine. Or a $1,000 tow.
greyhair 6y ago
"Say “I don’t know” or “I don’t have an opinion” when you don’t" My father drove this into us as kids. It always made sense to be, and then I grew up, and realized how many times adults just make shit up to avoid looking like they don't have the answer. My in-laws are pros at this, and playing Balderdash against them is impossible as a result. To this day, as some one that has been an engineer for 36 years, if someone asks me a question and I don't know the answer, I say "I don't know", generally followed by, "let's see where we would find that answer". And I am raising my kids with the same advice.
- kertoip_1 6y ago
  From my observations, people that don't act certain are not necessarily respectable among other people. I mean, I agree that saying "I don't know" is morally correct, but in practice, in real life, it's not the best strategy.
  - derwiki 6y ago
    It’s a low key signal I look for when interviewing candidates: when it’s clear they don’t know something do they say so? Or pretend they do
guidoism 6y ago
Something missing on the list that I found out a few years ago: Hire a personal stylist to help you find what kind of clothing works for you. This is especially helpful to the stereotypical geeky male nerd like me. It helped me a lot to go to a clothing store with this person and learn what works. Friends work too but it was an epiphany for me to hire a pro for this. Money well spent that is still paying off in my ability to dress nicely.

537 points by thesephist 6y ago

Oh, this speaks to me as well! Just like Mr. Cvitkovic, I grew up in a very frugal environment - out of necessity. But it took me a lot of time to realize, in my adulthood, that I can now afford some tradeoffs. Grocery delivery is big on my list. I hated, hated, hated going into malls to shop. So did my wife. So we switched to grocery delivery five or six years ago, and never looked back. And in Covid times, it is a double blessing. Of course, it is easy to "overcorrect" and start spending too much. That is part of the process of learning, after all.

avhon1 6y ago

> Treat fines like payments > e.g. park illegally and let yourself think of the (expected value of the) fine as a parking fee This doesn't seem like something you're "allowed" to do. Maybe more like "able" to do, in the sense that you can violate other laws, and maybe the payoff or the risk/reward ratio makes it worthwhile. My understanding of "allow" is that it means people will accept you doing something. The existence and enforcement (like fines) of rules that prohibit doing things seems exclusive to something being "allowed".

Jtsummers 6y ago
I did something like that in college a couple times. $10 fine for parking in the wrong spot on campus, only risk was being unable to register for a parking permit the next term if you didn't pay it off. It (on the few occasions I did it) beat the alternative of a 20- to 30-minute walk due to conflicting schedules (like having a medical appointment that got me to campus after most others had arrived). They'd only ticket once as long as the car was only there for 2-3 hours. Perfect for a class, drive to lunch, park properly after. Certainly not something to do frequently, and it wasn't illegal parking, it was just not permitted parking.
- soperj 6y ago
  It's insane that any college would be set up in such a fashion that you'd have to drive to class. (Unless I'm misunderstanding this, and you're talking about driving to school?)
  - gen3 6y ago
    I would assume they lived off campus...
  - Jtsummers 6y ago
    I lived at home because it was cheaper (free other than yard work, housework, and doing my own laundry), campus was 3 or 4 miles away depending on which end I needed (and roads were just dangerous enough I wasn't going to cycle, tried it, didn't like the assholes throwing shit at me). Most students lived on campus, but many (including locals like me) lived off campus. But even those who lived on campus, the furthest dorms were where I'd have had to park on those mentioned days. I did that sometimes, but it really was a 20- to 30-minute walk depending on where I was going on campus because they decided a mile long parking lot made more sense than a parking deck (later built, after I graduated). Also it had a bus service, but it really only covered connecting the business school, psychology school, and main campus. The massive parking lot was not covered by the bus service, which didn't make sense.
    - soperj 6y ago
      ahh that makes more sense. Thought you were saying you were driving from one class to another.
      - TylerE 6y ago
        That's not really that uncommon either. Lots of colleges have satelite campuses in addition to (now-landlocked) main campuses.
    - jgwil2 6y ago
      Is it a common experience for cyclists to have shit thrown at them?
closeparen 6y ago
In this context "you're allowed to" means "this didn't necessarily occur to you as part of the solution space, but it is." For example many programmers have it in their heads that their only two activities are writing production code and staring at/thinking about log output. Sometimes it's helpful to be reminded that you are "allowed" to write scripts to analyze log output. No one is worried that they will be punished for this. But a surprising number of programmers will stare down a programming-shaped problem and fail to put two and two together.
TylerE 6y ago
This is actually a well known thing in psychology. Instituting a fine can actually cause the undesired behavior to increase. E.g. daycare adds a late pickup fee, then it becomes, "Oh well, I can <get thing done> for $20" instead of something the parent feels really guilty about, thus actually INCREASING late pickups.
kthejoker2 6y ago
I worked at the college radio station located in the on campus student center, which also had a hotel attached. It was, like all campuses, annoying to find parking / work out transportation. Then one day I just needed to run get something, so I parked in the hotel loading zone. I ran into someone and chatted for about close to an hour and then, remembering where I parked, freaked out and ran outside. Car was still there, no problems. In true hacker fashion, I went and sat in the car and waited to see when someone would a campus metermaid would come along. They never did! And so for the next 2 years I parked there every day. In the end I did receive 6 $25 tickets and, ingloriously, I was towed once which cost me $250. Compared to a parking pass it was an absolute steal, and in true "things you're allowed to do" form, it helped me realize the risks of transgression are lower than you think.

spoonjim 6y ago

“Things you’re allowed to do if you’re rich.”

mhartl 6y ago
This point is explicitly addressed in the post: I haven’t tried everything on this list, mainly due to cost. But you’d be surprised how cheap most of the things on this list are (especially the free ones).
nsajko 6y ago
There certainly is something weird about the relation of the title of the blog post to its content: the content is mostly about services, a lot of which seem quite costly. I'm not saying the post doesn't make sense, but it would be good if the author added a background/motivation to it. Or maybe just if they didn't use the word "allowed".
dehrmann 6y ago
Maybe if you try to do all those things, but a lot of these are options for the upper middle class. It'd be rich people if it said "fly in a private jet."
- rzzzt 6y ago
  Private jets can be surprisingly cheap if you are sharing it with 200 other people and fly to the same destination.
graeme 6y ago
I did a lot of those in my first couple years of business when I had almost no money. Most of them aren’t especially expensive.

zoba 6y ago

"Engage a human productivity monitor - I know two people who have hired people to sit next to them or frequently contact them to keep them on-task" Shameless plug: if you're looking for a productivity monitor I can (personally) help: https://coding-pal.com/ https://coding-pal.com/

iandanforth 6y ago
Or for simple human presence as forcing function https://focusmate.com https://focusmate.com
- mwcvitkovic 6y ago
  Author here: thanks! Added these.

jsmo 6y ago

"Choose your own adventure" :)

deleted 6y ago

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nsajko 6y ago

> park illegally and let yourself think of the (expected value of the) fine as a parking fee It seems that (in San Francisco) it can be cheaper to pay the ticket fines than pay for the parking upfront like one is supposed to do: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24796412 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24796412

johnisgood 6y ago
Genius. :D
deleted 6y ago
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EamonnMR 6y ago

> Tape over annoying LED lights Also yet another use for BluTac

justinlloyd 6y ago
I have specifically taken devices apart to disable the LED inside. I also either put gaffer tape or black tape over the logos or use an angle grinder to clean them off.
- nullc 6y ago
  I also remove logos and go out of my way to avoid buying things that have obnoxious not-obviously removable logos. My home is not a billboard for your products, thank you very much.

eyelidlessness 6y ago

An astonishing amount of this list amounts to “spend money”, so while these things may play well here I think it’s worth pointing out that a large majority of the population is not allowed to do those things because they can’t afford to.

imgabe 6y ago
Psst - you are also allowed to make more money.
flyGuyOnTheSly 6y ago
You're allowed to save money for a future goal.
- eyelidlessness 6y ago
  I have. I’m also allowed to recognize that most people don’t have that luxury.
  - onecommentman 6y ago
    Median household income in US is $68K (2019) https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-economy-census-idUSKBN2662EY https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-economy-census-idUSKB... Median mortgage payment is $1550/mo. 40% of US homes are free of mortgage. https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/average-mortgage-payment?op=1 https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/average-mor... https://www.forbes.com/sites/brendarichardson/2019/07/26/nearly-40-of-homes-in-the-us-are-free-and-clear-of-a-mortgage/?sh=77ebca0447c2 https://www.forbes.com/sites/brendarichardson/2019/07/26/nea... There are a lot of folks in the US that are just scraping by. There are a lot more folks with enough disposable income to pursue one of these strategies. Not everybody. [And this doesn’t include wealth and savings.]
    - fsflover 6y ago
      The parent did not say "in the US".

emeraldd 6y ago

> Actually turn the heat/AC on I live in Texas, a good chunk of the year, it would be nuts to try to live without A/C (We're not quite Death Valley, but it can get pretty hot here ...). So, I'd amend that one to: "Open the windows and turn off the A/C" I really like the few months a year where I can do this and not get cooked!

jclulow 6y ago

> Buy goods/services from your friends Certainly you are _allowed_ -- but if it's for an economically meaningful service, like renting an apartment, the follow-on suggestion that it's "only weird if you make it weird" really fails to capture how likely it is that it _will_ change the nature of your relationship as soon as someone decides not to pay, or whatever other irreconcilable issue comes up. Just be careful when going into business in any way with people you otherwise like.

em-bee 6y ago
someone once summed his experiece that he should have followed the advice to make friends through business but don't make business with friends.
justatdotin 6y ago
given All This Shit (2020), I've been going out of my way to buy goods and services from friends who are feeling the economic impact
mwcvitkovic 6y ago
Author here: great point, I updated the post

blt 6y ago

> Treat fines like payments. e.g. park illegally and let yourself think of the (expected value of the) fine as a parking fee This is why all fine-based penalties should scale progressively with income.

ehwhyreally 6y ago
I remember I got a new job just outside of the city, my first day I got 3 fines for parking within 3 meters of a postbox, There was no yellow lines to say you could not nor was it signed. they fined me every 2 hours. cost me $1400 AUD. I never even knew this was a thing. I lived the next 3 weeks on soup. welcome to the city.
- dfcowell 6y ago
  This is another entry for the “things you can do” list... Contest unjust fines. I’ve received 4 parking fines in my life, all were for parking somewhere that had no signage or had signage that permitted my behaviour. All 4 were successfully contested with photo evidence and a minimum of fuss.
  - imgabe 6y ago
    You can also contest just fines. In the US fines are used as an undemocratic, regressive tax to raise extra revenue for the government. Everyone should contest every fine so they are unprofitable.
    - deleted 6y ago
      [deleted]
  - sixstringtheory 6y ago
    It definitely never hurts to ask. I recently, very absent mindedly, parked in a disabled parking spot and got a $250 fine. Wrote in with my sob story and that I truly do care about this kind of thing, was only there for ten minutes during which time several of the adjacent spots were open, and of course I’m willing to pay the fine as those are the rules... they forgive the whole amount. Not something I’d abuse, but second chances can be had.

AndrewKemendo 6y ago

This looks like an almost exact rehash of most of the advice from Tim Ferris' four hour work week. Basically: Outsource your personal life to accomplish things that you want to do. Ferris was using Brickwork India at the time if I recall. [1] https://www.brickworkindia.com/ https://www.brickworkindia.com/

dougmwne 6y ago
I think it's in that genre, but also has some fresh ideas. I actually really like this line of thinking. It seems "wrong" on the surface but really is just non-normative. If you can buy dinner for 2, you can also hire somone for a small job off fiver. One is seen as normal and the other as elitist and out of reach. I hired a genealogist once and absolutely got my money's worth and they were a world expert on records in that particular geography.

smitty1e 6y ago

It is still substantially true that the Internet is an autodidact's delight. There is so much excellent online content that, given a public library (beside the library itself) one can gather as much knowledge as one wants. Three other recommendations I give all youngsters: - stay sober - minimize debt - remain married

moonchild 6y ago
> remain married Is this such good advice? Relationships are hard work, and can be made (or mended) given sufficient effort. But sometimes, it just doesn't work and can't be made to.
- fossuser 6y ago
  Yeah I think a better bullet would be “choose your SO carefully”. Most people seem to choose their SO for bad reasons and then stay in it due to sunk costs.
  - smitty1e 6y ago
    Also, it's a recommendation, not a rule. If your SO proves a sociopath, you may be forced into unfortunate measures.
    - fossuser 6y ago
      Maybe you got married young because you both thought each other were sexually attractive in high school and you were young and stupid. Turns out a year in you don’t have a lot in common. Should you stay together and have kids together because you made a stupid decision based on sex? Your partner doesn’t have to be a sociopath for someone to decide marriage was a mistake for both parties.
      - smitty1e 6y ago
        It's a guideline, for external use. It can apply as well to a second round.

egypturnash 6y ago

* Modify your stuff * * Rotate your monitor to portrait ...and write a script to do this, along with rotating your drawing tablet to match (which may actually involve rotating it the other way depending on where the cable is and what works with your desk. Because poking around in the prefs with just one of monitor/tablet rotated is a major pain in the ass.

01000010x 6y ago

This is basically the book "The four hour workweek" by Thimothy Ferriss in a blog post

fossuser 6y ago

Asking obvious questions is one I’ve thought about. You learn a lot and make progress faster that way. I agree with most of the stuff in this list - they’re at least things to consider. https://zalberico.com/essay/2017/02/21/asking-questions.html https://zalberico.com/essay/2017/02/21/asking-questions.html

Slaren 6y ago
I am able to help you how you can find ways to help with your preparation, without specific difficulties and difficulties now, and then of course you have to refer to experts who can easily compose various essays and other works. See http://homework-writer.com/ http://homework-writer.com/ right now. Soon, people write complicated tasks, so that you can't think about the outcome. A lot of people are concerned about plagiarism, but there is no plagiarism in this area.

borishn 6y ago

> Follow up many times | You won’t make people mad if you’re polite. I am getting lots of emails from outsourcing companies. I ignore them. I find their follow up emails extremely frustrating. "Thanks for taking the time to read this email. After I sent my previous email (See below) I had put a reminder in to check-in with you to see how things were going with the need of a Data Engineering." Why should I care about your reminder?

jrumbut 6y ago
Presumably it would be less annoying if it was a highly specific request for something you are uniquely able to provide.
- borishn 6y ago
  The first one is less annoying, but the follow-up nagging is infuriating.
nicbou 6y ago
Same thing with automated SEO outreach. It's getting really annoying.

ramraj07 6y ago

Is there any service which allows you to share a personal assistant among many people? I would love to offload many of my menial tasks but I don't have enough to cover the time of a decent assistant. And anyone who is okay with sitting with their twiddling thumbs turns out to be not that good!

graeme 6y ago
Upwork lets you hire people for stuff like this. Some people may have 2-5 clients.
the_jeremy 6y ago
While I agree with the sentiment, most of the tasks I want to offload involve PII that I would not want to give to some random person. I would love a personal assistant who is able to do things like that, but I haven't seen a good model for a trustworthy one that would be cheap enough that it would still be worth hiring out for.
- ramraj07 6y ago
  Definitely not gonna hand over my tax returns but other than that, I'm not generally worried about it - granted they will still know reasonable amount of detail about me, that's the price you pay I suppose. Which is why I wasn't comfortable with fancyhands and other such services- I still want ONE person to handle my stuff, and have some ability to screen them for trustworthiness.
- jrumbut 6y ago
  Yeah I've tried to work on this before and it falls apart on the PII part and also the need to explain the context of everything.

k__ 6y ago

My findings: Sleep until noon every day. Work only as much as you need. Work from home, or anywhere else for that matter. Have multiple romantic partners in parallel. Have platonic friends of the opposite sex. Share multiple flats with multiple people (i.e. live in multiple places, but cheap) Study 10 years. Make your own iced tea in the fridge. Buy food in bulk. Drink tap water. Create your own dishes by mixing ingredients. Cook/fry/bake food you would usually eat raw. Eat food raw that you would usually cook/fry/bake. Sleep everywhere in your home. Learn languages, instruments, or sports after you turned 30. Drink no alcohol at a party and still have fun. Start/stop smoking and drinking after 30. Found a company like you would buy a game console. Take no VC money. Take muliple years and tries to create a good product. Write music/give concerts for yourself or your friends only. Don't wear shoes outside. Don't have an opinion on a topic. Overall: Don't play pre-defined games in your life, but ask if they make you happy. You only have one life, make the most out of it. Sometimes you have to play by some rules made up by other people to get into a better place, but look at them closely, it could very well be that they are more open to interpretation than they first seem.

renewiltord 6y ago
If nothing else, it appears like you'll live an interesting life this way, though perhaps not a long one if you take the 'start' path on the smoking.
Wened 6y ago
> Sleep everywhere in your home To the window, to the wall.
jtolmar 6y ago
Having done a large chunk of this myself, I feel like I have to ask about this one: > Share multiple flats with multiple people (i.e. live in multiple places, but cheap) I've never even heard of people doing this. How does it work? What's it like? It sounds fascinating, and like something I should've tried in my 20s.
- k__ 6y ago

andrewljohnson 6y ago

I doubt the marginal gains from sending followups on cold emails can make or break any business, it's rude, and it's mildly illegal. Maybe I'm just grumpy, but... if you send me a cold email, I'll either respond or delete it. Then, if the original didn't have an "unsubscribe" link, plus you follow up on it, I'll tell gmail to block you.

k__ 6y ago
I think it depends on the content. I gave advice to many people who cold emailed me. But in my personal experience, most cold emails I wrote wouldn't lead to much, because my inquiries were too specific.
graeme 6y ago
I did think cold email wasn’t the best example, as that tactic is overused. Though if it is extremely well targeted and personal it could make sense. However, one thing people don’t do often enough is follow up when the other person has expressed interest. This kind of followup is usually welcome, as inertia and distraction lead to things not happening. This is especially true in commercial context. Eg someone may express strong interest in buying, get busy, drift off, then enthusiastically buy when you ping them a bit later.
- andrewljohnson 6y ago
  Agreed, I'll treat any followup where I've actually responded in any way like the person sending it is a real human with feelings.

iandanforth 6y ago

Some more that are free(ish): Pick from your spices at random when cooking and resolve to use whatever you get Schedule working sessions with remote coworkers where you share a zoom room but just work Shave your head and donate your hair Volunteer to speak with elderly (maybe by phone for now) and collect their life stories Learn who is building what in your neighbor hood (e.g. https://dbiweb02.sfgov.org/dbipts/ https://dbiweb02.sfgov.org/dbipts/) Picket things by yourself Find a big mud puddle and jump in it until you look like a monster Climb trees as an adult Play music on street corners Go to church and ask questions until you're asked to leave Knock on people's doors and introduce yourself Troll craigslist for free ceramics (plates dishes etc) and smash the heck out of them Take apart your toaster and put it back together again, don't stop until it works again

aryamaan 6y ago
> Take apart your toaster and put it back together again, don't stop until it works again I find entry interesting. But what happens if it short circuits. Are there any tests which we can do on things to know that before turning them on?
- legerdemain 6y ago
  > don't stop until it works again
- dkersten 6y ago
  > Are there any tests which we can do on things to know that before turning them on? Yes. Buy a cheap multimeter and test current flow on cables.
- stdbrouw 6y ago
  If it short circuits, the circuit breaker on that circuit will open up and cut power within a couple of milliseconds, before anything has had a chance to catch fire. Though I definitely second the sibling comment about the multimeter.
  - 6y ago

renewiltord 6y ago

It's funny. His conclusion with the "life is cheap to save" was that he could save lives. Mine was that I don't care that much about the arbitrary life.

jbandela1 6y ago

> Surgery for appearance or comfort Be very careful about this. Surgery in the modern age is safe, but there is always a risk, whether from the surgery itself, the anesthesia, or from infection. Be sure that you are really sure that the benefits outweigh the risks.

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forgotmypw17 6y ago

Live largely without using money. Minimalism, abstention, freganism, hand me downs, barter, begging, and luck. Make websites which work in any browser, including 25yo classics, in the spirit of the open web. Sleep without a schedule. Ditto kay on multiple parallel romantic partners, with a whole larger than the sum of the pieces. Travel somewhere without any lodging plans, only a sleeping bag. Think for yourself and don,t do unhealthy things even if they are normalized. This is a whole other list. Maintain your health and sanity as top priority over anything else. Abandon materialism and attachment. Harm no living being on purpose. Make friends with mammals, plants, insects. Meditate any time of day for any length of time as many times as see fit. Be effective and happy while doing all this. Tailor your own reality based on your intent. Not eat for 72 hours comfortably and be better off for it. Sadly, I am seemingly not allowed to have a reasonable Web browser with a view source button and unstupid address bar on a small form factor device. I,m looking, though...

analognoise 6y ago
I know it's supposed to sound whimsical and bohemian, but this advice sounds like the worst kind of hobo-Karen.
- hungryforcodes 6y ago
  Actually I started living pretty much like this after my startup sold four years ago. I saw a dramatic increase in my happiness and life satisfaction. All my friends back home complain about how everyone seems so increasingly unhappy. Karen as I understand her is a prototypical suburban soccer mom. By definition she couldn't be bohemian. I'm not sure quite what is being said here.
  - benrbray 6y ago
    > Actually I started living pretty much like this after my startup sold four years ago. I saw a dramatic increase in my happiness and life satisfaction. Wow, all that's holding back my life satisfaction is a major windfall! Thanks for the useful tip.

idolaspecus 6y ago

Details aside, I think it’s good the point that you can (if you’re lucky) proactively engage with the world on your own terms. Anecdotally, as a new first time home owner I’ve been recently rediscovering this fact and it has been so immensely positive for my psyche. It’s like I was playing a game where the world was 99.9% closed off and now I’m part of reality again. Side note: this experience has also really opened my eyes to the importance and power of affordable home ownership.

legerdemain 6y ago

This list links to another one in the same spirit: "How to Trade Money and Time."[1] To be totally honest, all lists like these make me think of young male friends who went through a distinctive weird phase in their early 20s. For a period of 1-2 years, they would scour books ranging from self-help to moral philosophy in order to build a Simplistic System for Living. Maybe it had to do with getting their first engineer salaries, because a central tenet of my friends' philosophies somehow always ended up being "time and money are interchangeable." Of course, it is naive to think that just because many things can be bought, all things can be bought, at least reasonably. And as my friends got older and acquired adult responsibilities, families, roles in the local community, they dropped their philosophical regimen and just tuned into typical affluent suburbanites. But it's that glimmering realization that still strikes me as kind of fascinating to watch: "I can buy... things!... with money! That means I can buy... anything!" In particular, I'd love to know what exactly the person in the post I linked to was thinking when writing this sentence: > Spend more to go to events where you will meet exactly the people you want. Everything that comes to my mind feels either niche or unreliable. An expensive professional conference? You're either already part of that professional community, or going to an event like that is kind of a mixed bag. Paid dating services? Maybe I don't understand that world. A fancy party where you get to mingle with VCs? That's very specific. Are there meetups where the cost of attendance is a significant filter? My experience in this arena has been that you need serendipity, and it's hard to buy serendipity. [1] https://meteuphoric.com/2014/03/25/how-to-trade-money-and-time/ https://meteuphoric.com/2014/03/25/how-to-trade-money-and-ti...

forgotmypw17 6y ago
>For a period of 1-2 years, they would scour books ranging from self-help to moral philosophy in order to build a Simplistic System for Living. Maybe it had to do with getting their first engineer salaries, because a central tenet of my friends' philosophies somehow always ended up being "time and money are interchangeable." I went through this too. It,s a result of pressure to Do More, Faster, which comes with that engineer salary and long work weeks. You have 1-2 hours free per day, max, and feel an enormous pressure to do something worthwhile with that time. It,s chasing meaning while already having given away most of your time to build someone else,s meaning.

sellyme 6y ago

One time when I was younger, in my late teens, I was walking through the city around 8pm. I suddenly felt rather cold, and went through the typical 15 seconds of internal grumbling. I then had an epiphany, and walked into a nearby department store to purchase a jacket. Somehow I'd never even considered that as a possibility previously. As silly as it may seem, I use that singular point in time as the reference for when I commenced adulthood. I've got no idea if others have similar experiences (I grew up very poor, so I was probably primed against the idea of spontaneously buying something to begin with), but the contents of this list seems to be very much in the same vein.

legerdemain 6y ago
Nowadays, you'd probably just order one on your phone, and a drone would deliver it to you, and a taco.
k__ 6y ago
lol Reminds me of a time when I was in the city with a friend. My shoes were broken, so I said to him "I need new shoes" went in the next department store, bought a pair, threw my old ones in a trash can and wore the new shoes. He was mind-blown.
- jaspax 6y ago
  Both this and OP depend crucially on the hidden assumption that you have enough money to buy new shoes or a jacket on a whim. Depending on where you are, what kind of store it is, and how much money you have, it may be practically impossible to carry this out. Of course, having a reasonable amount of cash on hand to enable immediate, necessary purchases is also a mark of adulthood (it means you have a decent job), so the story still works.
  - Jommi 6y ago
    Or they suddenly realized that the immediate need for the product tipped over the scale for a purchasing decision that normally would have waited X amount of time. It's not like it's an item bought for no reason at all. (Not to mention in both instances they could go and return the item the next day)

AnimalMuppet 6y ago

When a checkout clerk asks if you have a coupon, you can reply "No, but you can give me a discount if you want". That works maybe 5 or 10% of the time. To me, that's worth the 10 seconds to say it.

qznc 6y ago
Research says you might have more success with a "because" in there like "No, but you can give me a discount if you want because would appreciate to pay less."

jdkee 6y ago

Is HVAC duct cleaning necessary? The intake air ducts pre-filter can accumulate dust but that is what the filter is for. Post-filter ducts are filled with cleaned air flowing through them. What am I missing?

Baeocystin 6y ago
My neighbor owns his own HVAC company, and has told me straight out that it's a waste of money. FWIW.
fingerlocks 6y ago
Floor mounted egress ducts are often covered with vents that have quarter inch gaps between each vent slot. All sorts of crap can fall in there, especially if you have children and pets.

gautamcgoel 6y ago

Lol I shared an office with this guy in grad school. Yo Milan!

diehunde 6y ago

I would also add: - You are allowed to buy lunch/dinner as much as you want and not feel bad for not wanting to cook.

tshibley 6y ago
I mean, fair if you are already a millionaire, but otherwise it seems good to at least be aware of how powerful saving $20 a day in the long run can be before making this choice
- woutr_be 6y ago
  As with everything, do it within reason. If you can't afford to buy lunch/dinner daily, obviously don't do it. But I think the point that the parent was trying to make was that if you don't feel like cooking one day, it's totally OK to go out for food. During my holiday this month, I've made it a point to go for a nice lunch every few days. Yes, it costs me money, money that I could save for my future (although I don't know what I would do with the extra money), but it's enjoyable, relaxing and the food is great.
- deleted 6y ago
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nicbou 6y ago
Just be aware that it's rather expensive in the long run. Getting to the restaurant and ordering also costs time. Cooking is useful, rewarding and attractive. Eating out is better enjoyed occasionally.
- AntiImperialis2 6y ago
  >Cooking is useful, rewarding and attractive. Not so much if you don't enjoy it. I love cooking occasionally. For example, I will spend a week trying to perfect a dish I just learned. I do it over and over everyday, trying different ways and failing until I make it great. But for most of the time, I'd rather not have to do it. >Just be aware that it's rather expensive in the long run. True. But if your time is valuable, it's much more expensive to have to spend all that time in the kitchen.

beefman 6y ago

A few of these things tend to empower. Most of them don't. What reliably empowers is: choose a skill and practice it constantly. So few people do this, it's a practically guaranteed route to financial, social, and intellectual security. Taking the time to do your own grocery shopping, or not, is a gating factor exactly never. Almost all other types of human activity are weak compared to the compounding action of just doing something all the time. In the short term, activities like complaining or optimizing random chores may seem stronger. But on timescales of years they're just noise. https://twitter.com/sama/status/1331256688998051844 https://twitter.com/sama/status/1331256688998051844

kome 6y ago
" A few of these things tend to empower. Most of them don't." I agree, but empowerment is for poor people. Just poor people have to learn a trade and have the skill in order to sell their workforce on the labor market. I have seen many rich entrepreneurs, that just buy those skills and set up successful business. Of course, they have some skill too: being able to buy they right resources is a skill, sort off.
- deleted 6y ago
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onecommentman 6y ago

Thumbs up for personal trainer. For this community especially, there will come a time when sedentary starts to take its toll. For me, 35+. It is a royal pain in the rear to try to start a fitness program on your own and stick to it. Too many excuses and too likely to overdo it and either injure yourself or lose motivation. Enter the personal trainer. It took me 6 months of training to get over the hump and into a self-sustaining mode. 3 days/week for 26 weeks. You don’t need elite training. If you skip on a day, you are skipping on a person. They will ensure you stay safe and motivated. Worth every penny and pays dividends for decades. Split it with a friend and get the semiprivate rate.

jhanschoo 6y ago

> Give to charity It's really worth properly doing due diligence before you commit to the donation. And if you don't have a good cushion yourself, rationally speaking, chances are you should save it. Just earmark that amount to be willed to charity upon death or extraordinary loss.

lazyjones 6y ago

I learned to use computers to automate things instead of having to talk to people to get them to do menial tasks for me! More seriously, some good suggestions there that aren't too obvious, like hiring article authors as consultants instead of googling for professionals.

keiferski 6y ago

This reminds me of an old video of Steve Jobs. His idea is simple, but it's really powerful. In short: the world is something you can change, not merely participate in. When you grow up, you tend to get told that the world is the way it is and your life is just to live your life inside the world, try not to bash into the walls too much, try to have a nice family life, have fun, save a little money. That’s a very limited life. Life can be much broader, once you discover one simple fact, and that is that everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you. And you can change it, you can influence it, you can build your own things that other people can use. Once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again. And the minute that you understand that you can poke life and actually something will, you know if you push in, something will pop out the other side, that you can change it, you can mold it. That’s maybe the most important thing. It’s to shake off this erroneous notion that life is there and you’re just gonna live in it, versus embrace it, change it, improve it, make your mark upon it. I think that’s very important and however, you learn that, once you learn it, you’ll want to change life and make it better, cause it’s kind of messed up, in a lot of ways. Once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYfNvmF0Bqw https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYfNvmF0Bqw

Ultcyber 6y ago
while I like the idea expressed by the quote, I don't like the overall judgemental sentiment that "if you don't mold the world around you, you live a poor version of life". It reminds me of something that could be said by a cultist person coach. Nothing wrong or worse I think with living a simple life.
- gonzo41 6y ago
  It's hard not to reflect on Steve Job's quotes like that and think about how Apple manufactures it's phones. What a reality they've created for the foxcon workers.
  - 0x10c0fe11ce 6y ago
    One could argue they’re just following local laws. Though it won’t make any difference because their brand carries such weight and status that I find it will be almost impossible to vote it out with our wallets. We’d better shut up and just accept the new truth from our self appointed feudal masters.

speculator14 6y ago

Only in the last couple years did I realize you could buy t shirts you like instead of just wearing giveaways you have accumulated.

Buttons840 6y ago

Here's mine: You're allowed to be productive in a sub-optimal programming language or library. Something my perfectionist self needs to hear.

mklepaczewski 6y ago

If you're procrastinating a lot I can highly recommend hiring someone to sit beside you and watch you. For me ROI was insane. 33%-50% more billable hours (currently at 5h/day), income after expenses rose by 50-66%. Nothing worked for me, to do lists, apps, pomodoro, organizers, calendars. But when someone watches me I just work. Every day I connect with that person at 9:00 AM sharp through Hangouts, share my screen and his webcam (I need to see the other person, I don't need to share mine for it to work on me) and we spend like this 8 hours a day. Unfortunately, focusmate didn't worked for me either, I'm such a good procrastinator that I was putting off making appointments ;).

chordalkeyboard 6y ago
Did this person agree to do this for free or are you paying to have an accountability partner?
- mklepaczewski 6y ago
  I'm paying close to national minimum wage for it. I'm willing to pay more if that person becomes my personal assistant. I think you can find someone just like me (and possibly you) and have an agreement to connect every day for a whole work day and do it for free. But then there're two procrastinators quite happy to not connect for whatever silly reason, so watch out ;-)
sebmellen 6y ago
How do you find someone like this? It’a exactly what I’m looking for.
- mklepaczewski 6y ago
  It's a family member, stay at home dad with kids still young enough that need to be watched over, but old enough that you just need to be there most of the time. I wanted to do this for a long time, but always thought that it might be expensive. Until one time my brother in law was on non-paid leave for two weeks and he was looking for anything to do. We decided to give it a go. Everyday he would sit beside me, watch Netflix for all day and just look at my screen from time to time. Productivity rose _instantly_. After a single day I was thrilled, after a week I was absolutely sure that I need to hire someone after he gets back to his old job. Some tips: the person you're going to hire must be somewhat cheeky. They must cut through your bs, force you to explain why you're on youtube, ask you if you really need that for your work etc. Furthermore, working side by side works better than through Hangouts, Skype and others. I have multiple displays and I've started to cheat the system as vast majority of screen share apps allow you to share single screen only. We're in process on finding an app that allows one to share all displays (you might need couple extra CPU cores if you have 4-5 displays).

acjohnson55 6y ago

I once missed an overnight bus in a developing country, which was going to result in the loss of a day at my destination. After sulking for a few minutes, I posed the idea that we offer to pay someone to drive us overnight, under the suspicion that this would be surprisingly affordable. Turns out, it was affordable, and we did it. It was, however, the scariest night of my life. I don't recommend doing this, but it was a lesson in what is possible, if I think outside the box.

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Toutouxc 6y ago
Did you pay a weird person or an exceptionally bad driver? I'm curious.
- acjohnson55 6y ago
  Normal guy, but he didn't have the papers to drive out of his district, and so he was flooring it down the highway with lights off. We had to bribe several guards at checkpoints, and at one point, we were commandeered by paramilitary who wanted to hitch a ride to a different destination. The driver eventually managed to give them the boot, after much heated argument. We also had no common language with the driver, which added another layer to everything. It was an adventure!

nicbou 6y ago

In aggregate, paying for all those things might chip at your disposable income and tie you to a certain lifestyle. You are only good at two things: earning money at your job, and spending it. The whole system is based on how much money you make, and that variable can change unexpectedly. There is also a time cost to orchestrating all those services. Aligning schedules is not nearly as efficient as doing thr work yourself. I prefer the idea of working less, spending less, and learning to do things yourself. Getting your hands dirty gives you a better appreciation for the result. It makes life more interesting and leaves you with a more diversified skillset.

vmurthy 6y ago

Something that happened recently! (I am 35 :-o) : I was a frequent (~3-4 times a day , 5 mins each time) visitor to coupon sites [0] hoping to snag that elusive discount. It hit me that over the course of 1 year I might save ~$500 but I'd have to spend 30mins each day (so potentially 200 hours a year in time alone not to mention the context switching) to save ~$500. My time is worth >$2.5/hour isn't it? So, I now have consciously decided to save up the extra $500 for these sort of purchases. Totally worth it! [0] www.ozbargain.com.au

enriquto 6y ago

Basically a "rich people's guide to life". A bit depressing for those of us that cannot afford most of the things described here. No, I'm not actually allowed to do any of this because I don't have enough money; thanks. > park illegally and let yourself think of the (expected value of the) fine as a parking fee That one made me laugh out loud. Is it a serious document or a parody of sorts? Is it mocking a "rich" people's lifestyle?

jstummbillig 6y ago
No wait, I understand the instinct, but I feel this list is less about its specific items. To me it felt helpful as an encouragement to think different or anew about things. The naive "why?" Attitude is all over it. Let your mind wander. Try to look past the authors personal perspective and you might find something for yourself. I did.

hermitcrab 6y ago

>Sure you could proofread your own document. No you can't. You can't tickle yourself and you can't proof read stuff that you wrote. You will just read what you thought you wrote.

AntiImperialis2 6y ago
You can, if you wait long enough.
Veen 6y ago
You can but you have to use various tricks to make it work: - Play back what you've written with text-to-speech software. On a Mac, you can do this with the option-escape keyboard shortcut. - Read it out loud yourself, slowly. - Leave at least 24 hours between drafting and proofreading, longer if possible. - Print the text in a different font and proofread on paper, marking errors with a pen. - Use a "focus mode" that dims everything but the sentence you're proofreading. Read through each sentence slowly and deliberately. iA Writer can do this, as can a few other text editors. - Use tools like Grammarly, but consider what they say guidance rather than hard-and-fast rules. They are often wrong or have an overly narrow definition of correctness, but they will help you to catch typos and and errors such as repeated words. However, depending on time and money constraints, it's often more efficient to pay someone to do it for you.

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LockAndLol 6y ago

I would like to hire a physicist (probably particle physicist) to write a paper about an idea I have for a battery. It would be really great to have a verdict on it with an in depth reason of "why" and "how". I have considered studying physics myself to answer the question (free education FTW), but won't have the time for another 3-4 years (unless I happen upon a hundred thousand euros or so to pay my living expenses during the 3-5 years of study). Paying an expert to do it seems reasonable. Do free lance researchers exist?

dredmorbius 6y ago

Some of these tips may backfire. Parking illegally may trigger a $25 fine. Or a $1,000 tow.

greyhair 6y ago

"Say “I don’t know” or “I don’t have an opinion” when you don’t" My father drove this into us as kids. It always made sense to be, and then I grew up, and realized how many times adults just make shit up to avoid looking like they don't have the answer. My in-laws are pros at this, and playing Balderdash against them is impossible as a result. To this day, as some one that has been an engineer for 36 years, if someone asks me a question and I don't know the answer, I say "I don't know", generally followed by, "let's see where we would find that answer". And I am raising my kids with the same advice.

kertoip_1 6y ago
From my observations, people that don't act certain are not necessarily respectable among other people. I mean, I agree that saying "I don't know" is morally correct, but in practice, in real life, it's not the best strategy.
- derwiki 6y ago
  It’s a low key signal I look for when interviewing candidates: when it’s clear they don’t know something do they say so? Or pretend they do

guidoism 6y ago

Something missing on the list that I found out a few years ago: Hire a personal stylist to help you find what kind of clothing works for you. This is especially helpful to the stereotypical geeky male nerd like me. It helped me a lot to go to a clothing store with this person and learn what works. Friends work too but it was an epiphany for me to hire a pro for this. Money well spent that is still paying off in my ability to dress nicely.