23 ms·

My wife recently passed away. I used my time off to build her a giant bookshelf

536 points by frans 6y ago

frans 6y ago
What a story...
- jacquesm 6y ago
  Quite. Thank you for posting.
  - frans 6y ago
    I found it quite comforting that both the author and his wife both saw this as a project they wanted to get done. There just wasn't enough time to complete it. Before reading the story, I feared the guy had always postponed it, only to start on it when it was too late...
    - benburleson 6y ago
      I had the same thought, and I worried there would be more regret in the story. While it's not a (traditionally) happy story, I'm glad that wasn't the case. It's still a good reminder to pull the trigger on those things that will impact your life. Don't wait for the perfect time, or when you'll have "more time" to do it right. It's cliché now, but Live Your Best Life; it's too short to put that off.
ChrisMarshallNY 6y ago
Nice to see Reddit as a good place. For all the darkness, online, there can also be light.
- Cthulhu_ 6y ago
  They've had a number of reorganizations over the years to get rid of the more toxic subcultures on there.
  - propogandist 6y ago
    the reorganizations were primarily to appease advertisers, and they've also increased all sorts of tracking, including outbound link click tracking, pushing their POS mobile app etc. There's also serious censorship [2] and narratives that are pushed, especially messaging that's pro-CCP, mostly thanks to the recent $150M investment from Tencent https://old.reddit.com/r/undelete/top/?t=year https://old.reddit.com/r/undelete/top/?t=year https://www.reddit.com/r/nextfuckinglevel/comments/j2lti8/a_high_school_student_in_hong_kong_sealed_off_and/ https://www.reddit.com/r/nextfuckinglevel/comments/j2lti8/a_...
    - EasyTiger_ 6y ago
      Don’t forget things like this being promoted on the “Popular” section: https://reddit.com/r/pics/comments/j2q1g8/standback_and_standby/ https://reddit.com/r/pics/comments/j2q1g8/standback_and_stan... There are many in the thread of Jewish faith asking it to be taken down, feeling that it promotes Holocaust denial /minimisation. If you read the horrendously uncaring Moderator sticky post dripping with sarcasm you get a good feel for the state of Reddit in 2020.
      - ciarannolan 6y ago
        One problem with Reddit is that every major community experiences something akin to Channel Drift [1]. Like the subreddit you linked to (r/pics), they all become some version of r/politics-lite where the majority political view gets shoved into every possible sub-community, even where it's not relevant. It makes the default subreddits totally unusable imo. Sometimes I just want to see funny pictures, not be lectured to about why I'm a racist or how my unconscious biases blah blah blah. [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Channel_drift https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Channel_drift
- slx26 6y ago
  As I say with all these massive social networks: they have tons of users, and there is all kinds of people in the world, so it's bound to be a lot of interesting and useful and inspiring and enlightening content in them. That still doesn't say much about the social network itself.
galoisgirl 6y ago
> at the ripe old age of 30 Fuck me...
- jleyank 6y ago
  This is a reminder for what we should all keep in mind... Things happen. Work for tomorrow but remember today. And record your journey.
  - widforss 6y ago
    I read this [0] just yesterday, and section 5 is acutely relevant here. I also liked the Halley comment in the discussion [1]. But yes, fuck cancer. [0]: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24637930 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24637930 [1]: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24640599 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24640599
- incanus77 6y ago
  Once this happens in your life, you never look at opportunities and time the same way. My wife died from pancreatic cancer at 36, and it seems like there are little reminders all the time... like today, when she would have turned 41. Truly, carpe diem.
pen2l 6y ago
It seems so fulfilling, being able to make such beautiful things. But also a bit expensive eh... to get the woodworking skills (presumably by taking classes at a technical college?), the equipment, and the time involved. If any folks here are capable of doing this stuff, would you please share details of your journey, I feel inspired to learn some of this myself. Did you feel it was all worth it, what would you do differently if starting over again?
- julianlam 6y ago
  I always feel very humbled when I read stories about things that makers make. As someone with absolutely no skills in woodworking, metalworking, or anything of the sort, it is completely awesome (in the traditional sense of the word) and seemingly so far out of my potential.
  - coldtea 6y ago
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTcvmmOkqJI https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTcvmmOkqJI
- swiley 6y ago
  I wouldn't say I'm good at woodworking, but just like with programming you can go read about it or watch youtube tutorials. I've built a few simple things with a $20 power drill and a cheap hand saw.
- wegs 6y ago
  It's less expensive than pre-made furniture. A good place to get started is construction lumber -- just 2x4s. They're not bad once you clean them up with a sander and potentially planer and finish them, and they have a certain industrial aesthetic raw. They're cheap enough that if you mess up or change your mind, you can throw them away and try again. And if you want to redo a piece of furniture, you can do that too. If you want to make a custom mount for something, just drill a hole. Homes look surprisingly good when all the furniture is custom -- floor-to-ceiling wall-to-wall bookcases, desks designed for what's on them, etc. -- even if it's just cheap construction wood. From there, you can move upscale. You can go quite far with Home Depot plywood sheets. Done well, they look great. I have a mix of fine woodworking pieces (which take a month or two to do), to things which take a couple hours to throw together. And it feels awesome once most of the furniture in your home is handmade. And it's a much better use of space. Get a few 2x4s, a pair of cordless drills, some nice screws, a circular saw, a carpenter's square, a tape measure, and safety glasses and you're good to go to get started. If you want to step it up a notch, get a random orbital sander, proper guides, (GOOD) clamps, a router, and a jigsaw. If you can at all afford it, buy NICE tools. Better beats more. I'd rather have a good Bosch cordless circular saw and drill than a full kit of Walmart toolkit. And they'll cost less in the long run, with less damaged work pieces, and fewer broken tools. Also, Youtube videos are great. So are online woodworking forums. Classes are nice if you can afford them, but hardly necessary.
_Microft 6y ago
Memento mori. Do the things you really want to, need to or should do. One day, it's going to be too late.
- _Microft 6y ago
  Maybe surprisingly, this was my brain speaking and not the gut. Having a visceral feeling for our mortality might be 'good' in a sense but so far I have really avoided meditating on it. I fear that it would be a really disconcerting experience.
- MeinBlutIstBlau 6y ago
  There is a german word for that: torschlusspanik Basically means the unsettling feeling that opportunities will vanish as one ages
  - _Microft 6y ago
    Torschlusspanik is rather the (possible) outcome if one is not aware of one's mortality until it is almost too late already, I would say.
  - sjcsjc 6y ago
    Fantastic word. Thank you. I love wiktionary's example usage: "Midlife-crisis-induced Torschlusspanik has driven quite a few middle-aged men into the arms of young women, wrecking countless marriages." [0] [0] https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Torschlusspanik https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Torschlusspanik
    - mistermann 6y ago
      Here's a nice YouTube channel you may like. https://www.youtube.com/c/obscuresorrows/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/obscuresorrows/videos A compendium of invented words written by John Koenig, that aims to fill holes in the language—to give a name to emotions we all feel but don't have a word for. The author's mission is to capture the aches, demons, vibes, joys and urges that roam the wilderness of the psychological interior. Each sorrow is bagged, tagged and tranquilized, then released gently back into the subconscious.
newfie_bullet 6y ago
Wow, amazing project. Alway interesting to see what people can do with some technical skill and wood working capability. Really beautiful way to honour the memory of his wife - cancer is terrible.
nullc 6y ago
The lighting looks nice, but I think it'll be a little unfortunate when the strip starts failing. Other than the strip that shelving could last decades, but the lights won't. I've had mixed luck with LED strip, -- with some becoming glitchy after only a few months of operation.
- tylermenezes 6y ago
  Sounds like you bought cheap LED strips. The slightly more expensive ones are a lot more reliable.
  - nullc 6y ago
    In fact, I bought fairly expensive ones but I think what I got were fakes. (Thanks amazon). I subsequently found a vendor that I get reliable parts from -- but the point remains that regardless of how good those strips are, the shelves will outlive them.
    - drm237 6y ago
      You could say that about any lightning source used anywhere. In general, a piece of wood is going to outlast and electrical device.
      - nullc 6y ago
        Right, but if e.g. it were fixtures with socketed bulbs they could be replaced. I built large bookshelves last year (though not as cool as the posts) and didn't integrate lighting for this reason-- and it's really good that I didn't because it turned out the strip I was using at the time didn't last long.
- giarc 6y ago
  I've had some start to twitch and it's usually a bad connector. When I first installed my LED lights the connectors were actually a destructive type. They would pierce the strip to make the connection. The resulted in shaky connections that would fail easily. I then upgraded to non-destructive connectors and they work much easier.
newbie578 6y ago
Man what a depressing story.. You could say that it isn't a story, but just life.. Life is unfair, and life just happens, the best thing we can do is try to live the best we can. Have to say, that really is a wonderful bookshelf, I just hope to see a picture when it is full of books.. I cannot even fathom how heart breaking it must be, every time you see the bookshelf, you remember your dead wife and her life wish she didn't get too see fulfilled. This kind of stuff just hits you differently.. I have also always wanted to have a home library where I can hide away and just read books for hours on end, guess this could be a kind of wake up call to go for it sooner than later, since you never know when your end is coming...
frankosaurus 6y ago
Is there a name for this type of ceiling? It's angled, so the roof is directly above the room (no attic). There's also a higher wall whose top portion is presumably adjacent to the attic. I've seen this in California homes, including my own master bedroom. It really heats up during the day, presumably due to heat convection from the roof and attic.
- wang_li 6y ago
  Vaulted or, less often, cathedral.
- hourislate 6y ago
  It's called Vaulted Ceiling. https://www.housebeautiful.com/design-inspiration/a32993197/what-is-a-vaulted-ceiling/ https://www.housebeautiful.com/design-inspiration/a32993197/... Typically there isn't a lot of room between the ceiling and the outside roof and the insulation they use in that space doesn't provide enough protection from the heat and cold. This is an area that is ideal for Spray Foam which provides superior insulating properties. https://www.houleinsulation.com/cathedral-roofs-vaulted-ceilings-insulation-spray-polyurethane-foam.html https://www.houleinsulation.com/cathedral-roofs-vaulted-ceil...
- tempest_ 6y ago
  Called a vaulted or cathedral ceiling around here. Often looks nice but as you say in some climates you pay to heat or cool that space.
  - ip26 6y ago
    The problem is less conditioning the extra space and more the fact that a good R-60 roof requires about twenty inches of fluffy insulation between the drywall ceiling and the roof deck.
gummydog 6y ago
My woodworking journey started when I was quoted $2500 to fix my porch railings. $1000 in materials, $1000 in tools mix in youtube tutorials and patience and now I'm hooked. The sliding compound mitre saw was the life changing tool for me. It was what was holding me back all these years from doing my own projects. I was always outsourcing this type of work for simply the cutting of lumber and thought I could do better than what I paid for. My railings turned out really well and mercifully passed the wife approval test.
- alasano 6y ago
  Like probably many people here I had my first computer (running DOS) at an early age. I've never shied away from DIY projects but didn't truly feel comfortable that I'd do them well until I started building up my tool collection. Equipped with the right tools and youtube as you mentioned, there's usually nothing complicated about it and it's a lot of fun to go from virtual to physical creation.
- blhack 6y ago
  YES! This is why it's SO important to keep this sort of stuff in schools. Sliding compound miter saw is a magic tool. Now just wait until you get a MIG welder and a bandsaw, you'll be UNSTOPPABLE and the world will suddenly look a whole lot different! Sidenote: I'm the program director at a nonprofit where I teach/create curriculum. One of the workshops that I love teaching is a week long where we teach the following skills to a group of 12 kids: Welding: learn to run a mig welder well enough to make art, furniture etc. Welding is easier than you think! Woodworking: learn how to use a miter saw, and make 2x4s into smaller pieces and then reassemble them into larger pieces of different shapes! Arduino programming: make lights blink on and off in exactly the way you want them to, and learn some C++ and core programming concepts in the process. Laser cutting: learn how to take things out of your imagination and create beautiful things on the laser. Lasers always blow peoples' minds at how cool the the things they can make are, and how easy it is to use them. These specific skills mean that these teenagers leave with a totally shifted perspective on the world around them. The experience you had realizing that the railing you wanted to fix was actually something that you can interact with and modify is what we're doing for these kids, but doing it with: things made of bits (computing), things made of wood, things made of metal, and things made on a computer (CNC). I'm really passionate about it. If you know of a group of kids that would enjoy this type of workshop, please email me!
orliesaurus 6y ago
What a nice thing to do! However I couldn't not notice the typical anonymous mob commenting. Some of the comments on that reddit are so mean. How evil can some folks be when someone just went through his wife's passing.
- nicolas_t 6y ago
  I didn't see much of that, most of the comments seems to be nice and supportive (at least I've felt a bit uplifted from how nice a lot of the comments were)
  - brianush1 6y ago
    Most of the bad ones have been removed now: https://www.removeddit.com/r/DIY/comments/j321gz/my_wife_recently_passed_away_i_used_my_time_off/ https://www.removeddit.com/r/DIY/comments/j321gz/my_wife_rec... Lots of comments talking about how it's too little too late and accusing OP of karma-whoring.
    - tclancy 6y ago
      Hell of a way to do it.
- furyofantares 6y ago
  Do you have comments sorted by controversial or something? It took me quite a while to find the comments I think you're talking about in any other sorting method.
  - orliesaurus 6y ago
    I sorted by newest
- random_visitor 6y ago
  This kind of comments are really difficult to get rid of, especially so in a site that doesn't strictly tie with your real self. Also, that kind of behaviour is extremely hard to curb. If moderators lay guidelines on what kind of talk is and isn't allowed, people attack the mods and the subreddit for taking away their freedom. If mods are lenient, this and much worse happens. I used to moderate a popular sub (top 100 subs on reddit), and I hate to say that these are mild by reddit standards and about what you should expect on a popular post (the key being "reddit standard"). I'm pretty sure mods are cracking down on these comments, but a mob of people can generate them much faster than a dozen or so volunteers can delete away
NKosmatos 6y ago
Gargantuan bookshelf but for a good cause...sorry for his loss :-( Here are the images and descriptions from imgur while building it, without the reddit commentary: https://imgur.com/a/rL5Z6Sd https://imgur.com/a/rL5Z6Sd
mszcz 6y ago
Heh, I'd love to start, but now I unfortunately have a good excuse. As soon as I get to it, I'm sure I'll first-time-manual-cpp-memory-management my fingers right off my fucking hand and I'll end up in a hospital in a middle of a pandemic...
- anonAndOn 6y ago
  If you have the money, there are saws that will save your fingers.[0] [0]https://www.sawstop.com/ https://www.sawstop.com/
j7ake 6y ago
Beautiful bookshelf! At a capacity of 5200 books I feel “bookshelf” does not do the work justice, maybe a “library” is more fitting.
BlueScreenDeath 6y ago
God I wish my wife would pass away. I'd build something great too.
inamberclad 6y ago
Woodworking was the happiest time I had in high school. Second happiest was between FIRST robotics and Track and Field.
hikerclimb 6y ago
Glad she died...
hikerclimb 6y ago
One less person on earth...
mongol 6y ago
I want to do some kind of shelf where my TV hangs in front, and some kind of pulley system to lift it to access what is behind on the shelf. I think that would be a clever use of limited wall space. But I have not found anything like it online and it feels quite complicated to construct from scratch. Any ideas?
- robbyking 6y ago
  In my experience, the woodworking community is extremely friendly to newcomers. Find some online tutorials, building something small to get used to using your tools, then ask away!
joshstrange 6y ago
When I bought my house I told myself I was going to learn how to do woodworking so that I could build some basic things or improve some things. I bought a bunch of tools and built a workbench (err, well, I finished 90% of it, I never cut the final boards for the bottom shelf) and then... did nothing. I need to finish the workbench and move it to the back of my garage (once I move it I can't put in the bottom shelf without moving it back). Does anyone have any good starter-projects or good things to do to "flex" the "muscle" of woodworking?
- raister 6y ago
  Start doing the projects by Rex Krueger (YT), then some of foundations by Paul Sellers (blogs, YT), I'll leave here some manual woodworkers for your delight: - James Wright, Wood by Wright - Mike Siemsen - Rob Cosman - Frank Klausz - Shawn L. Graham, Worth The Effort - Roy Underhill - Joshua Farnsworth, Wood and Shop - James Hamilton, aka Stumpy Nubs - Matthew Cremona - Jay Bates - Shannon Rogers - Simon James
  - joshstrange 6y ago
    THANK YOU! I'm adding these to my "Watch Later" list. I'm hoping this helps break my "woodworking-block".
  - takk309 6y ago
    I would add Christopher Schwartz to this list. Not really on youtube but his publishing company Lost Art Press is an absolute gold mine for information. His blog (blog.lostartpress.com) has some good information too.
- jonshariat 6y ago
  I really like the the weekend wood worker https://theweekendwoodworker.com https://theweekendwoodworker.com He has lots of starter projects but for the first one he suggest building a box because every woodworking project is more or less a variation on the box. I built a jewelry box for my wife. Made lots of mistakes but since it was small and simple I didn't feel stressed about wasting resources. (Wood isn't cheap)
hikerclimber 6y ago
good. one less person on earth.
mulmen 6y ago
Can someone repost the actual story? I can't figure out how to find it on Reddit. I can only see some of the comments.
- ljoshua 6y ago
  https://imgur.com/a/rL5Z6Sd#fHXcJVD https://imgur.com/a/rL5Z6Sd#fHXcJVD
leonardteo 6y ago
For me, I find woodworking and more specifically cabinet-making to be a very full-brain activity much like programming. It requires both left and right brain - technical and creative sides working simultaneously. It's become a joy and passion. I don't do it to save money (though the pieces I do turn out cheaper than if I'd hired someone) but just because I have a vision, and I want that vision to be precisely my vision, not what the contractor wants to do to get their job done cheaper and faster. If anyone's interested: https://leonardteo.com/woodworking/ https://leonardteo.com/woodworking/ I picked up woodworking only a few years ago after buying this place. Watched YouTube videos, attended a workshop where they taught some of the tools and safety. Then did the rest on trial and error.
leafmeal 6y ago
This is a really cool project, but I can't help thinking that the LED strips should have been placed closer toward the end of the shelf so that it illuminates the spines of the books instead of their tops.
throwaway743 6y ago
Love ftw.
seg_lol 6y ago
I can't imagine the loss. Books fill a void for me, but nothing that could fill that hole.

536 points by frans 6y ago

frans 6y ago

What a story...

jacquesm 6y ago
Quite. Thank you for posting.
- frans 6y ago
  I found it quite comforting that both the author and his wife both saw this as a project they wanted to get done. There just wasn't enough time to complete it. Before reading the story, I feared the guy had always postponed it, only to start on it when it was too late...
  - benburleson 6y ago
    I had the same thought, and I worried there would be more regret in the story. While it's not a (traditionally) happy story, I'm glad that wasn't the case. It's still a good reminder to pull the trigger on those things that will impact your life. Don't wait for the perfect time, or when you'll have "more time" to do it right. It's cliché now, but Live Your Best Life; it's too short to put that off.

ChrisMarshallNY 6y ago

Nice to see Reddit as a good place. For all the darkness, online, there can also be light.

Cthulhu_ 6y ago
They've had a number of reorganizations over the years to get rid of the more toxic subcultures on there.
- propogandist 6y ago
  the reorganizations were primarily to appease advertisers, and they've also increased all sorts of tracking, including outbound link click tracking, pushing their POS mobile app etc. There's also serious censorship [2] and narratives that are pushed, especially messaging that's pro-CCP, mostly thanks to the recent $150M investment from Tencent https://old.reddit.com/r/undelete/top/?t=year https://old.reddit.com/r/undelete/top/?t=year https://www.reddit.com/r/nextfuckinglevel/comments/j2lti8/a_high_school_student_in_hong_kong_sealed_off_and/ https://www.reddit.com/r/nextfuckinglevel/comments/j2lti8/a_...
  - EasyTiger_ 6y ago
    Don’t forget things like this being promoted on the “Popular” section: https://reddit.com/r/pics/comments/j2q1g8/standback_and_standby/ https://reddit.com/r/pics/comments/j2q1g8/standback_and_stan... There are many in the thread of Jewish faith asking it to be taken down, feeling that it promotes Holocaust denial /minimisation. If you read the horrendously uncaring Moderator sticky post dripping with sarcasm you get a good feel for the state of Reddit in 2020.
    - ciarannolan 6y ago
      One problem with Reddit is that every major community experiences something akin to Channel Drift [1]. Like the subreddit you linked to (r/pics), they all become some version of r/politics-lite where the majority political view gets shoved into every possible sub-community, even where it's not relevant. It makes the default subreddits totally unusable imo. Sometimes I just want to see funny pictures, not be lectured to about why I'm a racist or how my unconscious biases blah blah blah. [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Channel_drift https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Channel_drift
slx26 6y ago
As I say with all these massive social networks: they have tons of users, and there is all kinds of people in the world, so it's bound to be a lot of interesting and useful and inspiring and enlightening content in them. That still doesn't say much about the social network itself.

galoisgirl 6y ago

> at the ripe old age of 30 Fuck me...

jleyank 6y ago
This is a reminder for what we should all keep in mind... Things happen. Work for tomorrow but remember today. And record your journey.
- widforss 6y ago
  I read this [0] just yesterday, and section 5 is acutely relevant here. I also liked the Halley comment in the discussion [1]. But yes, fuck cancer. [0]: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24637930 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24637930 [1]: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24640599 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24640599
incanus77 6y ago
Once this happens in your life, you never look at opportunities and time the same way. My wife died from pancreatic cancer at 36, and it seems like there are little reminders all the time... like today, when she would have turned 41. Truly, carpe diem.

pen2l 6y ago

It seems so fulfilling, being able to make such beautiful things. But also a bit expensive eh... to get the woodworking skills (presumably by taking classes at a technical college?), the equipment, and the time involved. If any folks here are capable of doing this stuff, would you please share details of your journey, I feel inspired to learn some of this myself. Did you feel it was all worth it, what would you do differently if starting over again?

julianlam 6y ago
I always feel very humbled when I read stories about things that makers make. As someone with absolutely no skills in woodworking, metalworking, or anything of the sort, it is completely awesome (in the traditional sense of the word) and seemingly so far out of my potential.
- coldtea 6y ago
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTcvmmOkqJI https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTcvmmOkqJI
swiley 6y ago
I wouldn't say I'm good at woodworking, but just like with programming you can go read about it or watch youtube tutorials. I've built a few simple things with a $20 power drill and a cheap hand saw.
wegs 6y ago
It's less expensive than pre-made furniture. A good place to get started is construction lumber -- just 2x4s. They're not bad once you clean them up with a sander and potentially planer and finish them, and they have a certain industrial aesthetic raw. They're cheap enough that if you mess up or change your mind, you can throw them away and try again. And if you want to redo a piece of furniture, you can do that too. If you want to make a custom mount for something, just drill a hole. Homes look surprisingly good when all the furniture is custom -- floor-to-ceiling wall-to-wall bookcases, desks designed for what's on them, etc. -- even if it's just cheap construction wood. From there, you can move upscale. You can go quite far with Home Depot plywood sheets. Done well, they look great. I have a mix of fine woodworking pieces (which take a month or two to do), to things which take a couple hours to throw together. And it feels awesome once most of the furniture in your home is handmade. And it's a much better use of space. Get a few 2x4s, a pair of cordless drills, some nice screws, a circular saw, a carpenter's square, a tape measure, and safety glasses and you're good to go to get started. If you want to step it up a notch, get a random orbital sander, proper guides, (GOOD) clamps, a router, and a jigsaw. If you can at all afford it, buy NICE tools. Better beats more. I'd rather have a good Bosch cordless circular saw and drill than a full kit of Walmart toolkit. And they'll cost less in the long run, with less damaged work pieces, and fewer broken tools. Also, Youtube videos are great. So are online woodworking forums. Classes are nice if you can afford them, but hardly necessary.

_Microft 6y ago

Memento mori. Do the things you really want to, need to or should do. One day, it's going to be too late.

_Microft 6y ago
Maybe surprisingly, this was my brain speaking and not the gut. Having a visceral feeling for our mortality might be 'good' in a sense but so far I have really avoided meditating on it. I fear that it would be a really disconcerting experience.
MeinBlutIstBlau 6y ago
There is a german word for that: torschlusspanik Basically means the unsettling feeling that opportunities will vanish as one ages
- _Microft 6y ago
  Torschlusspanik is rather the (possible) outcome if one is not aware of one's mortality until it is almost too late already, I would say.
- sjcsjc 6y ago
  Fantastic word. Thank you. I love wiktionary's example usage: "Midlife-crisis-induced Torschlusspanik has driven quite a few middle-aged men into the arms of young women, wrecking countless marriages." [0] [0] https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Torschlusspanik https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Torschlusspanik
  - mistermann 6y ago
    Here's a nice YouTube channel you may like. https://www.youtube.com/c/obscuresorrows/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/obscuresorrows/videos A compendium of invented words written by John Koenig, that aims to fill holes in the language—to give a name to emotions we all feel but don't have a word for. The author's mission is to capture the aches, demons, vibes, joys and urges that roam the wilderness of the psychological interior. Each sorrow is bagged, tagged and tranquilized, then released gently back into the subconscious.

newfie_bullet 6y ago

Wow, amazing project. Alway interesting to see what people can do with some technical skill and wood working capability. Really beautiful way to honour the memory of his wife - cancer is terrible.

nullc 6y ago

The lighting looks nice, but I think it'll be a little unfortunate when the strip starts failing. Other than the strip that shelving could last decades, but the lights won't. I've had mixed luck with LED strip, -- with some becoming glitchy after only a few months of operation.

tylermenezes 6y ago
Sounds like you bought cheap LED strips. The slightly more expensive ones are a lot more reliable.
- nullc 6y ago
  In fact, I bought fairly expensive ones but I think what I got were fakes. (Thanks amazon). I subsequently found a vendor that I get reliable parts from -- but the point remains that regardless of how good those strips are, the shelves will outlive them.
  - drm237 6y ago
    You could say that about any lightning source used anywhere. In general, a piece of wood is going to outlast and electrical device.
    - nullc 6y ago
      Right, but if e.g. it were fixtures with socketed bulbs they could be replaced. I built large bookshelves last year (though not as cool as the posts) and didn't integrate lighting for this reason-- and it's really good that I didn't because it turned out the strip I was using at the time didn't last long.
giarc 6y ago
I've had some start to twitch and it's usually a bad connector. When I first installed my LED lights the connectors were actually a destructive type. They would pierce the strip to make the connection. The resulted in shaky connections that would fail easily. I then upgraded to non-destructive connectors and they work much easier.

newbie578 6y ago

Man what a depressing story.. You could say that it isn't a story, but just life.. Life is unfair, and life just happens, the best thing we can do is try to live the best we can. Have to say, that really is a wonderful bookshelf, I just hope to see a picture when it is full of books.. I cannot even fathom how heart breaking it must be, every time you see the bookshelf, you remember your dead wife and her life wish she didn't get too see fulfilled. This kind of stuff just hits you differently.. I have also always wanted to have a home library where I can hide away and just read books for hours on end, guess this could be a kind of wake up call to go for it sooner than later, since you never know when your end is coming...

frankosaurus 6y ago

Is there a name for this type of ceiling? It's angled, so the roof is directly above the room (no attic). There's also a higher wall whose top portion is presumably adjacent to the attic. I've seen this in California homes, including my own master bedroom. It really heats up during the day, presumably due to heat convection from the roof and attic.

wang_li 6y ago
Vaulted or, less often, cathedral.
hourislate 6y ago
It's called Vaulted Ceiling. https://www.housebeautiful.com/design-inspiration/a32993197/what-is-a-vaulted-ceiling/ https://www.housebeautiful.com/design-inspiration/a32993197/... Typically there isn't a lot of room between the ceiling and the outside roof and the insulation they use in that space doesn't provide enough protection from the heat and cold. This is an area that is ideal for Spray Foam which provides superior insulating properties. https://www.houleinsulation.com/cathedral-roofs-vaulted-ceilings-insulation-spray-polyurethane-foam.html https://www.houleinsulation.com/cathedral-roofs-vaulted-ceil...
tempest_ 6y ago
Called a vaulted or cathedral ceiling around here. Often looks nice but as you say in some climates you pay to heat or cool that space.
- ip26 6y ago
  The problem is less conditioning the extra space and more the fact that a good R-60 roof requires about twenty inches of fluffy insulation between the drywall ceiling and the roof deck.

gummydog 6y ago

My woodworking journey started when I was quoted $2500 to fix my porch railings. $1000 in materials, $1000 in tools mix in youtube tutorials and patience and now I'm hooked. The sliding compound mitre saw was the life changing tool for me. It was what was holding me back all these years from doing my own projects. I was always outsourcing this type of work for simply the cutting of lumber and thought I could do better than what I paid for. My railings turned out really well and mercifully passed the wife approval test.

alasano 6y ago
Like probably many people here I had my first computer (running DOS) at an early age. I've never shied away from DIY projects but didn't truly feel comfortable that I'd do them well until I started building up my tool collection. Equipped with the right tools and youtube as you mentioned, there's usually nothing complicated about it and it's a lot of fun to go from virtual to physical creation.
blhack 6y ago
YES! This is why it's SO important to keep this sort of stuff in schools. Sliding compound miter saw is a magic tool. Now just wait until you get a MIG welder and a bandsaw, you'll be UNSTOPPABLE and the world will suddenly look a whole lot different! Sidenote: I'm the program director at a nonprofit where I teach/create curriculum. One of the workshops that I love teaching is a week long where we teach the following skills to a group of 12 kids: Welding: learn to run a mig welder well enough to make art, furniture etc. Welding is easier than you think! Woodworking: learn how to use a miter saw, and make 2x4s into smaller pieces and then reassemble them into larger pieces of different shapes! Arduino programming: make lights blink on and off in exactly the way you want them to, and learn some C++ and core programming concepts in the process. Laser cutting: learn how to take things out of your imagination and create beautiful things on the laser. Lasers always blow peoples' minds at how cool the the things they can make are, and how easy it is to use them. These specific skills mean that these teenagers leave with a totally shifted perspective on the world around them. The experience you had realizing that the railing you wanted to fix was actually something that you can interact with and modify is what we're doing for these kids, but doing it with: things made of bits (computing), things made of wood, things made of metal, and things made on a computer (CNC). I'm really passionate about it. If you know of a group of kids that would enjoy this type of workshop, please email me!

orliesaurus 6y ago

What a nice thing to do! However I couldn't not notice the typical anonymous mob commenting. Some of the comments on that reddit are so mean. How evil can some folks be when someone just went through his wife's passing.

nicolas_t 6y ago
I didn't see much of that, most of the comments seems to be nice and supportive (at least I've felt a bit uplifted from how nice a lot of the comments were)
- brianush1 6y ago
  Most of the bad ones have been removed now: https://www.removeddit.com/r/DIY/comments/j321gz/my_wife_recently_passed_away_i_used_my_time_off/ https://www.removeddit.com/r/DIY/comments/j321gz/my_wife_rec... Lots of comments talking about how it's too little too late and accusing OP of karma-whoring.
  - tclancy 6y ago
    Hell of a way to do it.
furyofantares 6y ago
Do you have comments sorted by controversial or something? It took me quite a while to find the comments I think you're talking about in any other sorting method.
- orliesaurus 6y ago
  I sorted by newest
random_visitor 6y ago
This kind of comments are really difficult to get rid of, especially so in a site that doesn't strictly tie with your real self. Also, that kind of behaviour is extremely hard to curb. If moderators lay guidelines on what kind of talk is and isn't allowed, people attack the mods and the subreddit for taking away their freedom. If mods are lenient, this and much worse happens. I used to moderate a popular sub (top 100 subs on reddit), and I hate to say that these are mild by reddit standards and about what you should expect on a popular post (the key being "reddit standard"). I'm pretty sure mods are cracking down on these comments, but a mob of people can generate them much faster than a dozen or so volunteers can delete away

NKosmatos 6y ago

Gargantuan bookshelf but for a good cause...sorry for his loss :-( Here are the images and descriptions from imgur while building it, without the reddit commentary: https://imgur.com/a/rL5Z6Sd https://imgur.com/a/rL5Z6Sd

mszcz 6y ago

Heh, I'd love to start, but now I unfortunately have a good excuse. As soon as I get to it, I'm sure I'll first-time-manual-cpp-memory-management my fingers right off my fucking hand and I'll end up in a hospital in a middle of a pandemic...

anonAndOn 6y ago
If you have the money, there are saws that will save your fingers.[0] [0]https://www.sawstop.com/ https://www.sawstop.com/

j7ake 6y ago

Beautiful bookshelf! At a capacity of 5200 books I feel “bookshelf” does not do the work justice, maybe a “library” is more fitting.

BlueScreenDeath 6y ago

God I wish my wife would pass away. I'd build something great too.

inamberclad 6y ago

Woodworking was the happiest time I had in high school. Second happiest was between FIRST robotics and Track and Field.

hikerclimb 6y ago

Glad she died...

hikerclimb 6y ago

One less person on earth...

mongol 6y ago

I want to do some kind of shelf where my TV hangs in front, and some kind of pulley system to lift it to access what is behind on the shelf. I think that would be a clever use of limited wall space. But I have not found anything like it online and it feels quite complicated to construct from scratch. Any ideas?

robbyking 6y ago
In my experience, the woodworking community is extremely friendly to newcomers. Find some online tutorials, building something small to get used to using your tools, then ask away!

joshstrange 6y ago

When I bought my house I told myself I was going to learn how to do woodworking so that I could build some basic things or improve some things. I bought a bunch of tools and built a workbench (err, well, I finished 90% of it, I never cut the final boards for the bottom shelf) and then... did nothing. I need to finish the workbench and move it to the back of my garage (once I move it I can't put in the bottom shelf without moving it back). Does anyone have any good starter-projects or good things to do to "flex" the "muscle" of woodworking?

raister 6y ago
Start doing the projects by Rex Krueger (YT), then some of foundations by Paul Sellers (blogs, YT), I'll leave here some manual woodworkers for your delight: - James Wright, Wood by Wright - Mike Siemsen - Rob Cosman - Frank Klausz - Shawn L. Graham, Worth The Effort - Roy Underhill - Joshua Farnsworth, Wood and Shop - James Hamilton, aka Stumpy Nubs - Matthew Cremona - Jay Bates - Shannon Rogers - Simon James
- joshstrange 6y ago
  THANK YOU! I'm adding these to my "Watch Later" list. I'm hoping this helps break my "woodworking-block".
- takk309 6y ago
  I would add Christopher Schwartz to this list. Not really on youtube but his publishing company Lost Art Press is an absolute gold mine for information. His blog (blog.lostartpress.com) has some good information too.
jonshariat 6y ago
I really like the the weekend wood worker https://theweekendwoodworker.com https://theweekendwoodworker.com He has lots of starter projects but for the first one he suggest building a box because every woodworking project is more or less a variation on the box. I built a jewelry box for my wife. Made lots of mistakes but since it was small and simple I didn't feel stressed about wasting resources. (Wood isn't cheap)

hikerclimber 6y ago

good. one less person on earth.

mulmen 6y ago

Can someone repost the actual story? I can't figure out how to find it on Reddit. I can only see some of the comments.

ljoshua 6y ago
https://imgur.com/a/rL5Z6Sd#fHXcJVD https://imgur.com/a/rL5Z6Sd#fHXcJVD

leonardteo 6y ago

For me, I find woodworking and more specifically cabinet-making to be a very full-brain activity much like programming. It requires both left and right brain - technical and creative sides working simultaneously. It's become a joy and passion. I don't do it to save money (though the pieces I do turn out cheaper than if I'd hired someone) but just because I have a vision, and I want that vision to be precisely my vision, not what the contractor wants to do to get their job done cheaper and faster. If anyone's interested: https://leonardteo.com/woodworking/ https://leonardteo.com/woodworking/ I picked up woodworking only a few years ago after buying this place. Watched YouTube videos, attended a workshop where they taught some of the tools and safety. Then did the rest on trial and error.

leafmeal 6y ago

This is a really cool project, but I can't help thinking that the LED strips should have been placed closer toward the end of the shelf so that it illuminates the spines of the books instead of their tops.

throwaway743 6y ago

Love ftw.

seg_lol 6y ago

I can't imagine the loss. Books fill a void for me, but nothing that could fill that hole.