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The point about the orange car was meant to be self deprecating! (The $10 inflatable dolphin is supposed to be cute, ends up being really freaky looking, go fi

by com2kid 13y ago

The point about the orange car was meant to be self deprecating! (The $10 inflatable dolphin is supposed to be cute, ends up being really freaky looking, go figure!) The dolphin was actually something I brought into work for my team to play with, we had a good chunk of the building watching as we flew it around our atrium. The problem is, it is hard to capture that I am the sort of person who is always thinking of ways to help make his team happy without writing really lame sentences like this one! I do write more sane messages, to a girl who had mentioned that she liked eating animals, What is your favorite mammal to consume? I've been on a lamb kick lately, lamb burgers stuffed with basil and spinach are so good! Put some goat cheese in the very middle, and life is divine! and in other food related messages! There is a place in the ID that sells durian milkshakes. The shakes are a bit on the strong side. :) What other sorts of weird things have you had? I think squid jerky was one of the more interesting foodstuffs I've tried. Overall, after 4 years of trying I've yet to find a good way to write messages. :/

enneff 13y ago
Try ending with the question, rather than leading it. For instance, taking your line about weird foods and flipping the sentences yields this: I think squid jerky was one of the more interesting foodstuffs I've tried. What other sorts of weird things have you had? The revised phrasing is more conversational. Ending with a question gives them something to go on. Otherwise they finish reading the message wondering what squid jerky is like and why you would say "foodstuffs" when you could use "foods" instead. And don't use weird language like that. Just say what you mean, simply. Your messages read as if you're trying to fill them with personality. ("Life is divine!" comes across as weird.) Stop using exclamation marks. You don't want to put too much information into messages. When you say less the other person will fill the blanks with their imagination, and people tend to be optimistic. They'll see you as they want to see you. Whereas your messages are full of a subtext that makes you seem over-enthusiastic and a bit "quirky!" (in other words: annoying). Sorry for being blunt, just calling it how I see it from the few messages you have posted.
- com2kid 13y ago
  > Try ending with the question, rather than leading it. For instance, taking your line about weird foods and flipping the sentences yields this: My sentence structure is almost always question first then statement, not the best form, but one that seems to come naturally to me. I'll work on flipping it around! Then again I enjoy abuse of English in general, one the sign offs to a message I sent went as such: With the names of artists hanging in the air, I shall end this message, with hopes of hearing a reply. (That one did get a reply!) I have done other hideous things on OKC as well, including getting into a short story writing contest with an English teacher one time. That was enjoyable. :-D
e12e 13y ago
IMNHO this whole (parent) message (less the quotes) sounds a lot more confident, sane and interesting than all those quotes put together (or taken separately). Perhaps you just need to relax and write as if you were talking to people here on hn. (I think the keyword in that sentence is people). If the women you respond to aren't interested when you're being honest -- why bother sending them messages at all? (Lame, casual sex, I guess -- but there must be easier ways to go about finding that than hanging out on a web page?)

by com2kid 13y ago

enneff 13y ago

Try ending with the question, rather than leading it. For instance, taking your line about weird foods and flipping the sentences yields this: I think squid jerky was one of the more interesting foodstuffs I've tried. What other sorts of weird things have you had? The revised phrasing is more conversational. Ending with a question gives them something to go on. Otherwise they finish reading the message wondering what squid jerky is like and why you would say "foodstuffs" when you could use "foods" instead. And don't use weird language like that. Just say what you mean, simply. Your messages read as if you're trying to fill them with personality. ("Life is divine!" comes across as weird.) Stop using exclamation marks. You don't want to put too much information into messages. When you say less the other person will fill the blanks with their imagination, and people tend to be optimistic. They'll see you as they want to see you. Whereas your messages are full of a subtext that makes you seem over-enthusiastic and a bit "quirky!" (in other words: annoying). Sorry for being blunt, just calling it how I see it from the few messages you have posted.

com2kid 13y ago
> Try ending with the question, rather than leading it. For instance, taking your line about weird foods and flipping the sentences yields this: My sentence structure is almost always question first then statement, not the best form, but one that seems to come naturally to me. I'll work on flipping it around! Then again I enjoy abuse of English in general, one the sign offs to a message I sent went as such: With the names of artists hanging in the air, I shall end this message, with hopes of hearing a reply. (That one did get a reply!) I have done other hideous things on OKC as well, including getting into a short story writing contest with an English teacher one time. That was enjoyable. :-D

e12e 13y ago

IMNHO this whole (parent) message (less the quotes) sounds a lot more confident, sane and interesting than all those quotes put together (or taken separately). Perhaps you just need to relax and write as if you were talking to people here on hn. (I think the keyword in that sentence is people). If the women you respond to aren't interested when you're being honest -- why bother sending them messages at all? (Lame, casual sex, I guess -- but there must be easier ways to go about finding that than hanging out on a web page?)