7 ms·
I was inspired by this comment https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=6813162 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=6813162 I find that lookback of 2 generally
by gamegoblin 13y ago
I was inspired by this comment
https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=6813162 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=6813162
I find that lookback of 2 generally creates more entertaining titles. Lookback of 3 usually seems to just splice together two titles (which can be hilarious, and is usually more grammatically correct), and lookback of 1 tends to generate more nonsense.
Some fun ones I found just now:
The Neuroscientist Who Discovered He Was a Teenage Hacker
How my comment on TechCrunch got me a new, useful superpower?
PHP Sucks But I Didn't
Windows 8 is 20% faster than C
The Navy’s newest warship is powered by WebGL
Cards Against Humanity has made comments even worse, I'm leaving
How Porsche hacked the financial system and made a html5 game, polished it many many times
Interestingly, if I change the code to pick the most likely word, followed by the most likely word, etc. the "most probable" post is "The New York Times and The Internet"
If I limit it to just 2013 posts, it is "The NSA surveillance".
My site is running on the smallest Digital Ocean droplet (512MB), if it goes down, I will feel silly. If it does, code can be found here: https://gist.github.com/grantslatton/7694811 https://gist.github.com/grantslatton/7694811
- ggambetta 13y agoMarkov chains are always hilarious. Try feeding it the whole text of a news article, or even a book; this way you can use higher lengths and get even more impressive results.
- drewhk 13y agoI am not sure. I have seen funny MC generated text before, but I think headlines are short and their structure plays well with the Markov Model.
- dgesang 13y ago> The Navy’s newest warship is powered by WebGL omg ymmd
- emhart 13y ago"PHP Sucks But I Didn't" is pretty hilarious, also knowing what the "most probable" is by year could be a great annual tradition. Did you check 2012 and 2011?
- Houshalter 13y agoOr the most probable per month would be interesting too.
- zaguios 13y agoHere's one I found that was quite amusing: "Aisle50 (YC S11) streamlines the search for aliens"
- icambron 13y agoThe best one I got was "Aisle50 (YC S11) is a valid ipv4 address"
- edkennedy 13y agoMy best one is "Voyager 1 spots new region at the edge of the iTunes EULA"
- andrelaszlo 13y agoAbsolutely brilliant. I'm dying. Supreme Court to avoid public shaming WordPress has left the solar system Cyanogen raises $7 million to build a perfect SNES emulator Washington Post to grow vegetables on weekdays
- egor83 13y ago> 5. WordPress has left the solar system Amazing. Thank you!
- frik 13y agoObama wins back the right to keep emails private John Resig's 'Secrets of the JavaScript Ninja Update' From YC Rejection to 10,000 Users in 1 Day PyPy is faster than pushing a pixel to the screen screenshot: http://s28.postimg.org/k9pdb67n1/funny.png http://s28.postimg.org/k9pdb67n1/funny.png
- kr4 13y agoCouldn't resist from posting these: -How Facebook is killing Linux on the desktop -MongoDB Raises $150 Million - And Still Isn't Difficult Enough To Watch HBO Shows -Facebook claims it can read your e-mail without a data plan -I am depressed and I need someone to talk to restaurants. -Ask PG: Will you share your data in plain English -France convicts Google Maps for iOS -Mars water surprise in Curiosity rover – I am depressed and I am building Tindie fulltime -SPDY Review by Opera Software has filed a lawsuit
- kr4 13y agoA few more (thanks for an hour long non-stop laugh!) -Microsoft made their own online textbook, save district $175,000 -Data.gov & 7 Other Sites to Shut Down Uber -Ramit Sethi and Patrick McKenzie on Getting Your First iOS App Store Nightmare -Valve: Piracy Is More Important Now Than Ever Before -iCloud’s Real Purpose is to Kill W3Schools -Pirate Bay Will Stop In Silicon Valley And Unemployed America -The Revolutionary Birth Control In The World: Maximizing Shareholder Value -Samsung flew bloggers to Berlin, then threatened to leave a tech job at Facebook -Google’s Marissa Mayer Has a Secret Backdoor in New Encryption Standard? (2007)
- skykooler 13y agoSome that made me laugh a lot: -In emergency cases a passenger was selected and thrown out of the Internet -In CSS, “px” is not broken: It’s a Pyramid Scheme -SpaceX's First Official Cargo Resupply Mission to Mars -Resistor hack turns a Nvidia GTX690 into a Bank -Google+ is now free on Amazon -Saturn's North Pole Is A Difficult Community to Participate In -JSON will be on 'every HP PC' shipping next year, says CEO -Mozilla and Epic Announce Unreal Engine for Vim -Every Black Hole Contains a New (and Better) Google -Why "Coupon Code" Should Not be a core type in PostgreSQL 9.2 -Skype 5 for Mac 1.1 -The author of Nginx on why V8 is not an iPad
- atmosx 13y agoHahaha these are AWESOME especially the facebook one and the MongoDB hahahahaha
- 13y ago
- DanI-S 13y ago> Deleted my portfolio, made $30k in my first six months of programming: from man-rodent to partyman
- sowhatquestion 13y ago"Ma'am, Your Burger Has Been Acquired by LinkedIn" ^ almost died laughing at that one just now
- timtadh 13y agoalso: "Learn You a Haskell is now larger than LinkedIn"
- theycallmemorty 13y agoThose are incredible.
- theycallmemorty 13y ago"MIT discovers a new syntactic feature to PHP"
- rbosinger 13y agoI want to work for Porsche! It sounds like they're getting shit done.
- deleted 13y ago[deleted]
- dirtyaura 13y agoOh boy, I haven't lauhde this hard for a while. You have created a masterpiece of algorithmic humor. A few gems from my trials: HIV-Infected Infant Cured With Early Use of 'App Store' First employee of startup? You are not colder than absolute zero No, really, pi is wrong: The NSA slide you haven’t seen $100k Revenues in One Click.
- dcohenp 13y agoHonestly, when I read the NSA one I started laughing, but then it kind of sent a shiver down my spine. Brrr.
- Draco6slayer 13y agoThe NSA had been spying on mathematicians, and discovered their greatest secret. Pi and e are actually switched. No, really, pi is wrong.
- dnqthao 13y agoThis one is so real! Q: “How much does an app cost?” A: “About as much as I make? Too scared to write a simple operating system Cook something or get out of bed for less than $10,000 per day.” In Math You Have to Find Them Fastest-growing YC S11 startup looking for hackers. Join us in our quest to kick healthcare's ass.
- jessedhillon 13y agoI got one which aptly describes a sentiment I feel often in general around here: The piece of shit startup I hate to love
- Kliment 13y agoThat one is actually authentic https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=6656728 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=6656728
- pawn 13y agoI thought this one was great: What it's like to be forked
- spyder 13y ago- MongoDB Gotchas and How We Nearly Lost the Discovery Shuttle - Show HN: My husband is Broken - Twitter acquires, you laugh, you're still loving - My dad unexpectedly uses my Linux laptop to get your attention. Join us! - Ask HN: my 5-year-old son to Acquire Lucasfilm Ltd. - Linux is now hosted in North Korea
- cfontes 13y ago"MongoDB Gotchas and How We Nearly Lost the Discovery Shuttle" This one is a gem. I can almost see the fishy article about it
- mattdeboard 13y ago> Most data isn’t “big,” and businesses are wasting money pretending it is a prison and damaging our kids Won't someone think of the children? > JPL director: Curiosity may have been causing USB disconnects
- DouweM 13y ago"NSA Boss Asks Congress For Blanket Immunity For Companies That Help NSA Whistleblower Edward Snowden"
- wolfgke 13y agoMy top 10 so far (in no particular order): Tesla wins in North Korea [since Kim Jong-un bought one] CISPA Passes in the browser Zynga Shuts Down Major Websites and Https Protocol [very plausible] The Rules of a startup [couldn't believe first this wasn't a HN title] Simple Minecraft Clone in 580 lines of Ruby [ditto] What's the best startups in the noise of 802.11 [even more true than HN] Parsley.js: never write a Web Application that makes you understand git [ditto] Why I am building a hulking floating data center [I wish someone would do it] Only a few countries are teaching children how to drive customers away [are these countries called "communistic"? ;-) ] Concurrency is not an iPad [having read so many strange comparisons concerning concurrency I'm not surprised...]
- FiloSottile 13y agoI've made a Twitter bot out of it, it will post on average every 5 hours. https://twitter.com/HNTitles https://twitter.com/HNTitles Code at https://github.com/FiloSottile/HNTitles https://github.com/FiloSottile/HNTitles
- cfontes 13y agoNice of you to release the code. Cheers !
- wilg 13y agoI threw together a little app that lets you vote for the funniest ones of these: http://headline-generator.herokuapp.com/ http://headline-generator.herokuapp.com/ (I also really want to update it to also do Upworthy-style headlines. And maybe combine the two?)
- wilg 13y agoUpdate: Now it does Upworthy also. And mashups. Amazing mashups.
- mFixman 13y ago> Show HN: I am very real
- vincvinc 13y agoStartup hopes to hack the beliefs that are holding you back Thank you for epitomizing HN.
- imrehg 13y agoPretty aggressive/pessimistic! RSS Is Dying, and You Should Too Edit: Some more funnies... Nimbus.io: Open-source alternative to the US Groupon is the new FTP And last but not least: Official Hacker News is bad for you
- Draco6slayer 13y agoScience fiction novel about an open-source country.
- ElectroPrime 13y agoWhy I Quit My Job to Start the Rest of My Life as an Apple Store Employee Facebook bans Adsense in all human history Show HN: We made an addictive way to fold a sheet of paper Rules of Storytelling According to the UK Gov Death to the ISS - Launch Webcast (starts at 12:00am PDT)
- corobo 13y agoFBI Document: [DELETED] had plan to kill an unresponsive SSH session Pffft, this is obviously just another internet conspiracy