3 ms·

I have no control over how you perceive my posts. I write them in a neutral way, produce text, and it's up to you to read in a tone of voice and mood. You are f

I have no control over how you perceive my posts. I write them in a neutral way, produce text, and it's up to you to read in a tone of voice and mood. You are free to perceive anything about them you want. You are certainly welcome to refuse to reply to them and you always were. I was apparently pleasant enough for you to give glib responses but not enough to reply with anything much of substance more than "you're asking a stupid question and you can never be as smart as me HAHAHA!!" I mean, if that's your answer then you probably are better off not responding to me at all, leaving my question hanging, and not polluting the conversation with such negativity. As for the start of an answer, what was wrong with just .. starting with that? What was the point of all the other stuff you wrote? Think about it. what is your mission here? to be informative or just to attempt to make me feel bad for being curious?

dandelany 13y ago
The mission is to make you a little more self-aware of how your posts are being read and perceived. "why am I explaining this again? is it really hard to understand? why?" does not sound like a neutral tone to most people, it sounds condescending, which is confusing when (as you admit) you are the one who is asking for an explanation for something you do not understand.
- TheZenPsycho 13y ago
  Yes I don't understand something and I'm asking for an explanation. If you, or someone else does not understand my actual question, and has nothing more to contribute than "It's hard" then I am not interested in their answers or their condescension and I couldn't give two tosses if you turn around and perceive me as being condescending. It's projection. And I wasn't asking you anyway. But since I'm here, what is the point of YOUR post? I don't need more self awareness, people on hacker news need to stop answering questions they don't understand with bullshit nonsense condescension and getting pissy when the victim of their idiocy gets annoyed by it. Seriously I will not tolerate this curiosity shaming, the ethic that one should feel embarrassed about asking questions. I do not buy the idea that it is condescending to be dissatisfied with shallow lazy nothing answers. I have no control over you perceiving it that way. It is just a flaw in your background that you should perhaps be more self aware about.
  - Dylan16807 13y ago
    You are being rude to people that you are asking a favor from. Stop blaming everyone else; isolate the common factor. They're not shaming you because of the asking itself.
    - TheZenPsycho 13y ago
      I am not being rude to people I am asking a favor from. I am being rude to people who have nothing to contribute here other than saying "oh it's too complicated for you to understand. Seriously I have been doing this for 15 years. it's just too hard to explain. You're just like my idiot mother who didn't understand how physics works. LOL". That is bullying. Not being helpful. I don't need favors from them. No, they are being rude. There was no reason to post that verbal diarrhoea and I'm just not taking it like a doormat, and that bothers you. The common factor is them being dickheads. If you look, there are lots of other thoughtful people answering me (with real actual answers and creativity instead of condescension) that I am rewarding and conversing with appropriately. The common factor is the culture of curiosity shaming here. And sorry, but quite frankly you and them can just get fucked. I don't care if you think I am being rude. I want to be rude about that. It is internet cancer. Other thoughtful people should be rude about it too. I want to shoo that attitude away from everywhere I can. Not walk on eggs just in case someone might take offense. You have no interest in making me "self aware". You just see a nail sticking up and you want to hammer it down.
      - Dylan16807 13y ago
        It's not the curiosity. It's the way you implied you knew better. Don't be smug. I don't know what to say about you telling me what my motivations are. Stop snapping to self-righteous conclusions.
        deleted 13y ago
        [deleted]
        13y ago

dandelany 13y ago

The mission is to make you a little more self-aware of how your posts are being read and perceived. "why am I explaining this again? is it really hard to understand? why?" does not sound like a neutral tone to most people, it sounds condescending, which is confusing when (as you admit) you are the one who is asking for an explanation for something you do not understand.

TheZenPsycho 13y ago
Yes I don't understand something and I'm asking for an explanation. If you, or someone else does not understand my actual question, and has nothing more to contribute than "It's hard" then I am not interested in their answers or their condescension and I couldn't give two tosses if you turn around and perceive me as being condescending. It's projection. And I wasn't asking you anyway. But since I'm here, what is the point of YOUR post? I don't need more self awareness, people on hacker news need to stop answering questions they don't understand with bullshit nonsense condescension and getting pissy when the victim of their idiocy gets annoyed by it. Seriously I will not tolerate this curiosity shaming, the ethic that one should feel embarrassed about asking questions. I do not buy the idea that it is condescending to be dissatisfied with shallow lazy nothing answers. I have no control over you perceiving it that way. It is just a flaw in your background that you should perhaps be more self aware about.
- Dylan16807 13y ago
  You are being rude to people that you are asking a favor from. Stop blaming everyone else; isolate the common factor. They're not shaming you because of the asking itself.
  - TheZenPsycho 13y ago
    I am not being rude to people I am asking a favor from. I am being rude to people who have nothing to contribute here other than saying "oh it's too complicated for you to understand. Seriously I have been doing this for 15 years. it's just too hard to explain. You're just like my idiot mother who didn't understand how physics works. LOL". That is bullying. Not being helpful. I don't need favors from them. No, they are being rude. There was no reason to post that verbal diarrhoea and I'm just not taking it like a doormat, and that bothers you. The common factor is them being dickheads. If you look, there are lots of other thoughtful people answering me (with real actual answers and creativity instead of condescension) that I am rewarding and conversing with appropriately. The common factor is the culture of curiosity shaming here. And sorry, but quite frankly you and them can just get fucked. I don't care if you think I am being rude. I want to be rude about that. It is internet cancer. Other thoughtful people should be rude about it too. I want to shoo that attitude away from everywhere I can. Not walk on eggs just in case someone might take offense. You have no interest in making me "self aware". You just see a nail sticking up and you want to hammer it down.
    - Dylan16807 13y ago
      It's not the curiosity. It's the way you implied you knew better. Don't be smug. I don't know what to say about you telling me what my motivations are. Stop snapping to self-righteous conclusions.
      - deleted 13y ago
        [deleted]
        13y ago