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"Why would I give someone 20 and then force them to spend them in a particular shop" Why _wouldn't_ you do that, if the circumstances suggested it? It's a way

"Why would I give someone 20 and then force them to spend them in a particular shop" Why _wouldn't_ you do that, if the circumstances suggested it? It's a way of giving someone some freedom in choosing their gift, while restricting it to a range. Maybe I want to buy someone a really nice suit, but I know they'd never do it themselves; they just can't bring themselves to spend a lot of money on a nice suit - they permanently dress in cheap clothes from discount stores. If I give them cash, they feel guilty for spending it on a suit, and also guilty if they _don't_ do that, because they know I wanted them to spend it on a nice suit. Gift voucher ahoy. I'm sure you can imagine other circumstances. Others that leap to my mind are; forcing someone to buy books instead of blowing it on alcohol and skateboards; making it harder for someone to buy drugs with it (there are always ways to launder gift vouchers, but the discount can be huge); giving gift vouchers for some place they really love as a way of demonstrating that you've actually thought about it. When someone gives me cash, it suggests to me that they haven't put in any effort. I'd rather they got me something that cost a fiver but they actually know I like, than giving me a twenty. I already have some money and from the point where I started working full-time, unless someone is going to give me a life-changing amount of money, they might as well not bother. A well thought-out gift-voucher can be a half-way house. Furthermore, when you give someone money (unless you give a life-changing amount), it just goes into their pocket with the rest of their money. Some will go on an electricity bill, some will go on food, some will be train fare, it'll all just disappear in things they were going to do anyway. Unless they were living on the breadline, you've made no difference - there is nothing that they have, or did, that was because you gave them some money. You might as well have not bothered. Money - it's the gift people don't even notice.

xd 14y ago
"When someone gives me cash, it suggests to me that they haven't put in any effort." Why would you assume someone has to make more than the effort of working for a pay check, and then giving you some of that hard earned cash to do with as you please? But then you go on to say; "unless someone is going to give me a life-changing amount of money, they might as well not bother." .. what the hell, dude?
- EliRivers 14y ago
  "Why would you assume someone has to make more than the effort of working for a pay check, and then giving you some of that hard earned cash to do with as you please?" Did they get up in the morning thinking "today I'm going to work hard so I can give that guy a nice present"? No. At some point they thought they'd better give me something, and reached for the easiest, most convenient thing they had. Some money. The bare minimum of thought went into it. Why do I want more than the bare minimum of thought? Because that's what friends do. More than the bare minimum. I spend hours and hours, sometimes spread over several weeks, thinking about and finding great gifts for people, because I genuinely like seeing my friends made happy by unexpectedly receiving something they'll really get a lot of pleasure out of. " "unless someone is going to give me a life-changing amount of money, they might as well not bother." .. what the hell, dude?" What? What's not to understand? Someone gives me a twenty. I already have a twenty. I have more than one. If there was something I wanted to buy with it, I already would have. Unless I'm living at the point where I am right on the breadline, one grocery bill from poverty, I won't even notice it (as above, it'll go into the pot marked "money" and just go on some bill or some tax or the rent or whatever). Sad but true; I have made enough to comfortably pay my bills with some left over. If they had stopped off somewhere and spent a five on something they really know I'd like, something that required them to think and spend some time, it would show real effort on my behalf. Sometimes the clichés are true; it's the thought that counts.
  - stephenr 14y ago
    So giving you $50 cash is lazy but buying you $50 of fucking juice is a well thought out present? Or giving you $50 to spend in a department store is better than $50 cash you can spend anywhere. It isn't more personal its just more restricted. Gift cards are like food stamps for middle class people. You may as well include a note saying "now don't you spend this on drugs".
tiziano88 14y ago
I don't know, if I received a gift card from a friend I would probably just be slightly annoyed and think that they could have given me the same amount of money and I would spend them however I want. Even in the case you are describing, I can think of someone wanting to buy me some nice clothes, and then giving me a gift card from a retailer, but then perhaps I'll go there and I won't find anything that suits me, and I'll be forced to buy something anyway. The fact that the retailer is written on the card and restricts my choices cannot possibly be a plus in my opinion. I would rather prefer getting 20£ and my friends telling me "I thought you could buy those trousers you like with them", and it would have the same effect, without needlessly restricting my choice. I agree with you that I would much rather receive a less expensive gift that has a special meaning from the person who is giving it to me, rather than just cash, even if more. A gift card does not seem the ideal solution to this problem to me though, since the category that a gift card applies to is still very broad. The point you make about not buying alcohol or drugs or whatnot is valid instead, I admit I did not think about it. Nevertheless, it still seems a pretty uncommon use case to me.
- EliRivers 14y ago
  They are a half-way house. A decent actual gift is far better. On the suit example, I was actually thinking more along the lines of a bespoke tailored suit; they're surprisingly reasonable if you shop around, and everyone can use a decent tailored suit :) Granted, that's something of a more expensive thoughtful gift - it's not something I'd do regularly, but it'd be a gift someone would appreciate for years and years. Every time they put it on, they'd remember that someone gave it to them specially; it'd provoke a pleasant emotional reaction every time. Literally a gift that keeps on giving. If you spent the same amount on, for example, a month's rent paid for them or something else that they just always spend money on, they'd barely feel a thing. Don't forget the skateboarding. It's all the kids spend their money on :p
  - stephenr 14y ago
    Everyone can use a decent tailored suit? No, you think people should have a tailored suit. I have 0 use for a tailored suit and would be offended if any of my friends tried to suggest I should buy a suit. I'm not a child I can decide what clothes are appropriate on my own thanks Your whole approach seems to be that you assume people are incapable of making decisions about their own lives.
mnicole 14y ago
One of my relatives sent us ugly sweaters and $20 Wal-Mart gift cards for 10 years. The thought was nice, but I'd rather have $20 in cash, not a random amount that I'm either going to stay under because I'm a kid without money (thus not being able to use the change for other things) or go over using the allowance I'm saving up for bigger purchases. I ended up saving all of the cards I'd ever received from her because I couldn't remember which ones still had money on them or not. This was before state laws were in place to stop gift cards from incrementally deteriorating in value over time as well, so by the time I felt they'd probably all have enough leftover to buy a pack of gum or something, the money was gone. I'd also say it's just as lazy as cash, judging by the lines of people at the customer service kiosks at malls that hand them out and how they're last-minute suggestions in line at the grocery store.
- EliRivers 14y ago
  " $20 Wal-Mart gift cards for 10 years." Well, that's essentially as thoughtless as cash. It's all about the thought behind it. No thought = rubbish gift.
  - mnicole 14y ago
    Even if cash is lazy, it's versatile. I'd rather the cost of a cheap gift rather than the gift itself.
stephenr 14y ago
If you want to buy them a suit take them to a tailor, but if hey don't want to buy a suit who are you to say they should? Either buy a gift and live with the fact they may not like it or give the real fucking money and pretend for a second they are an adult and can handle a decision about what to buy that they actually want
- EliRivers 14y ago
  Yeah, I already said that in another comment. Thanks for playing. To be fair, though, you do sound like the kind of person that a decent suit would be wasted on. Am I to take it that you refuse every gift everyone ever offers, in a fit of outraged morality? "How dare you offer me some money? Do you think I'm incapable of getting money? You want to WHAT? PAY FOR MY CUP OF COFFEE? How dare you!"

xd 14y ago

"When someone gives me cash, it suggests to me that they haven't put in any effort." Why would you assume someone has to make more than the effort of working for a pay check, and then giving you some of that hard earned cash to do with as you please? But then you go on to say; "unless someone is going to give me a life-changing amount of money, they might as well not bother." .. what the hell, dude?

EliRivers 14y ago
"Why would you assume someone has to make more than the effort of working for a pay check, and then giving you some of that hard earned cash to do with as you please?" Did they get up in the morning thinking "today I'm going to work hard so I can give that guy a nice present"? No. At some point they thought they'd better give me something, and reached for the easiest, most convenient thing they had. Some money. The bare minimum of thought went into it. Why do I want more than the bare minimum of thought? Because that's what friends do. More than the bare minimum. I spend hours and hours, sometimes spread over several weeks, thinking about and finding great gifts for people, because I genuinely like seeing my friends made happy by unexpectedly receiving something they'll really get a lot of pleasure out of. " "unless someone is going to give me a life-changing amount of money, they might as well not bother." .. what the hell, dude?" What? What's not to understand? Someone gives me a twenty. I already have a twenty. I have more than one. If there was something I wanted to buy with it, I already would have. Unless I'm living at the point where I am right on the breadline, one grocery bill from poverty, I won't even notice it (as above, it'll go into the pot marked "money" and just go on some bill or some tax or the rent or whatever). Sad but true; I have made enough to comfortably pay my bills with some left over. If they had stopped off somewhere and spent a five on something they really know I'd like, something that required them to think and spend some time, it would show real effort on my behalf. Sometimes the clichés are true; it's the thought that counts.
- stephenr 14y ago
  So giving you $50 cash is lazy but buying you $50 of fucking juice is a well thought out present? Or giving you $50 to spend in a department store is better than $50 cash you can spend anywhere. It isn't more personal its just more restricted. Gift cards are like food stamps for middle class people. You may as well include a note saying "now don't you spend this on drugs".

tiziano88 14y ago

I don't know, if I received a gift card from a friend I would probably just be slightly annoyed and think that they could have given me the same amount of money and I would spend them however I want. Even in the case you are describing, I can think of someone wanting to buy me some nice clothes, and then giving me a gift card from a retailer, but then perhaps I'll go there and I won't find anything that suits me, and I'll be forced to buy something anyway. The fact that the retailer is written on the card and restricts my choices cannot possibly be a plus in my opinion. I would rather prefer getting 20£ and my friends telling me "I thought you could buy those trousers you like with them", and it would have the same effect, without needlessly restricting my choice. I agree with you that I would much rather receive a less expensive gift that has a special meaning from the person who is giving it to me, rather than just cash, even if more. A gift card does not seem the ideal solution to this problem to me though, since the category that a gift card applies to is still very broad. The point you make about not buying alcohol or drugs or whatnot is valid instead, I admit I did not think about it. Nevertheless, it still seems a pretty uncommon use case to me.

EliRivers 14y ago
They are a half-way house. A decent actual gift is far better. On the suit example, I was actually thinking more along the lines of a bespoke tailored suit; they're surprisingly reasonable if you shop around, and everyone can use a decent tailored suit :) Granted, that's something of a more expensive thoughtful gift - it's not something I'd do regularly, but it'd be a gift someone would appreciate for years and years. Every time they put it on, they'd remember that someone gave it to them specially; it'd provoke a pleasant emotional reaction every time. Literally a gift that keeps on giving. If you spent the same amount on, for example, a month's rent paid for them or something else that they just always spend money on, they'd barely feel a thing. Don't forget the skateboarding. It's all the kids spend their money on :p
- stephenr 14y ago
  Everyone can use a decent tailored suit? No, you think people should have a tailored suit. I have 0 use for a tailored suit and would be offended if any of my friends tried to suggest I should buy a suit. I'm not a child I can decide what clothes are appropriate on my own thanks Your whole approach seems to be that you assume people are incapable of making decisions about their own lives.

mnicole 14y ago

One of my relatives sent us ugly sweaters and $20 Wal-Mart gift cards for 10 years. The thought was nice, but I'd rather have $20 in cash, not a random amount that I'm either going to stay under because I'm a kid without money (thus not being able to use the change for other things) or go over using the allowance I'm saving up for bigger purchases. I ended up saving all of the cards I'd ever received from her because I couldn't remember which ones still had money on them or not. This was before state laws were in place to stop gift cards from incrementally deteriorating in value over time as well, so by the time I felt they'd probably all have enough leftover to buy a pack of gum or something, the money was gone. I'd also say it's just as lazy as cash, judging by the lines of people at the customer service kiosks at malls that hand them out and how they're last-minute suggestions in line at the grocery store.

EliRivers 14y ago
" $20 Wal-Mart gift cards for 10 years." Well, that's essentially as thoughtless as cash. It's all about the thought behind it. No thought = rubbish gift.
- mnicole 14y ago
  Even if cash is lazy, it's versatile. I'd rather the cost of a cheap gift rather than the gift itself.

stephenr 14y ago

If you want to buy them a suit take them to a tailor, but if hey don't want to buy a suit who are you to say they should? Either buy a gift and live with the fact they may not like it or give the real fucking money and pretend for a second they are an adult and can handle a decision about what to buy that they actually want

EliRivers 14y ago
Yeah, I already said that in another comment. Thanks for playing. To be fair, though, you do sound like the kind of person that a decent suit would be wasted on. Am I to take it that you refuse every gift everyone ever offers, in a fit of outraged morality? "How dare you offer me some money? Do you think I'm incapable of getting money? You want to WHAT? PAY FOR MY CUP OF COFFEE? How dare you!"