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They grind up your skeleton, remove the dental gold, then re-name it "ashes?" That's not very "green." Why not add this to your will: 1. place my body on a p
by wbeaty 7mo ago
They grind up your skeleton, remove the dental gold, then re-name it "ashes?" That's not very "green."
Why not add this to your will:
1. place my body on a pile of dynamite on an Oregon beach, and blow it up (first issue umbrellas to the funeral party.) Or, failing that...
2. Freeze my body in liquid nitrogen, sharpen my head in a giant pencil-sharpener, then drive me into the ground as a fertilizer-spike.
3. Do #2 above, but throw my sharpened body from a plane flying over farmland. Add fletching to my legs to guarantee pointy-end-downwards.
4. Cast my body in a block of solidified transparent polyester resin, then use it as a large tombstone. People visiting can watch the slow decay, until years later it's a me-shaped bubble. (Leave a little drain-channel to prevent explosion from gas pressure.)
5. Once I saw a button-mushroom entirely take over a live eggplant. Do that to my body, but with psilocybe species. Then dry, grind, and smoke me up.
6. "Resomation," but that's too too conventional.
- rglover 7mo agoThis just reminded me of a friend who explicitly requested to be placed inside of a glass cube and then blown up, his body becoming an instant art project/memorial.
- ifh-hn 7mo agoI always quite fancied attempting the wick effect for cremation. Apparently it takes ages though... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wick_effect https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wick_effect
- djmips 7mo agoI don't think enough people realize the 'grind up your skeleton and re-name it "ashes"' part of cremation. skeleton powder is more apt. Enough of the euphemism!
- GJim 7mo agoEh? Common knowledge in Blighty where the majority of funerals are cremations. I'm puzzled why you appear to have a problem with this process?
- djmips 7mo agoI don't have a problem with the process. Is it common knowledge there? Maybe try aksing people what ashes are. I know it can be a touchy subject but I was pretty old when I found out in America.
- GJim 7mo agoThis is Britain! Most town museums of any size will have an Iron Age cremation urn full of burnt bone fragments on display. The ashes weren't exactly ground up back then. https://learn.folkestonemuseum.co.uk/objects/iron-age-crematin-urn/ https://learn.folkestonemuseum.co.uk/objects/iron-age-cremat...
- 47282847 7mo agoAfter a charcoal barbecue, don’t you consider the remains to be “ashes” even if there are some larger pieces of coal left in there?
- butlike 7mo agoI've thought about #2 a lot (well, with less hilarious-in-my-mind iconography), but the issue with becoming fertilizer is human->human diseases. Also if you normalize the behavior, it comes back to bite you during plagues where the crops will become diseased. Ultimately I land on: there's enough 'gotchas' with decomposing human remains where I think a graveyard will do. Though, I wish the casket wasn't necessary.