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I already told my loved ones to stop getting me gifts for my bday / holidays a few years ago. I have everything I want that wouldn't be obscenely expensive and

I already told my loved ones to stop getting me gifts for my bday / holidays a few years ago. I have everything I want that wouldn't be obscenely expensive and in poor taste to request. Whatever people got me ended up on a shelf or in a drawer and was just a waste (with a couple of rare exceptions when someone made / crafted me a gift, and then it's really wonderful). I can't imagine how useless an unthinking AI would be at this when my own family and friends who, and this is important, _know me_, can't find anything to get me that doesn't land in the above categories. I wouldn't have expected gifts to be a source of AI resource waste, but I must not be very imaginative.

amelius 1y ago
So true. Note that advertising also makes us over-consume. Technology is great, but it's also great for greedy people.
hathawsh 1y ago
While I agree with you in principle (people should do their own thinking if they want gifts to be genuine), I thought I would go ahead and see how well Gemini can advise someone on choosing a gift for you. https://gemini.google.com/share/88b694a09a89 https://gemini.google.com/share/88b694a09a89 The advice seems very good. What do you think? A donation to EFF or an open source project, a rare book, or handcrafted headphones seem like a good start for someone who can't afford anything extravagant.
- PcChip 1y ago
  Handcrafted headphones? I’m interested…
- foobarian 1y ago
  > handcrafted headphones "I wound the coils myself!"
  - hathawsh 1y ago
    Yeah, that was a little joke I slipped in, but OTOH, I've seen headphone kits that used 3D printed parts and it's not difficult to imagine someone replacing the 3D printed parts with handcrafted wood.
    - foobarian 1y ago
      And at the same time it's a not uncommon activity especially around university physics labs to wind various purpose-built magnets and transformers with exotic shapes.
- AndrewKemendo 1y ago
  This seems like a really solid list Also people keep confusing the response in the table because they are missing the “or”: Niche Tool or Sensory Item (Headphones) It’s not suggesting building headphones
foobarian 1y ago
I just train my family/potential gift givers to only consider consumables. That takes care of the clutter problem.
- parpfish 1y ago
  consumables are the way to go. as a receiver there's no long-term clutter or obligations. and depending on the type of consumable, there's the possible of getting to share/partake in it with the gift-giver and you've turned your consumable-gift into a no-obligation experience which is another nice type of clutter-free gift.
- soco 11mo ago
  I have heaps of jams, honey and candles. There are limits to the consumables as well. That, or people could think about diversifying consumables - although a lettuce head won't bring much Xmas spirit.
carlosjobim 1y ago
Gifts are not for your enjoyment, they are for the givers enjoyment. Don't take your loved ones for granted, because if you keep acting egocentrically towards them, they will one by one get tired of you.
- colechristensen 1y ago
  Not liking "stuff" culture doesn't make you a narcissist. Giving for your own pleasure and getting mad when you don't get the reaction you wanted... one of the most narcissistic behaviors is frequently accusing others of it.
  - carlosjobim 1y ago
    And that's not what I said either (even though I used the word narcissist first), that he has to like the gifts. Putting yourself above others is what makes your actions ego centrical. When somebody does something nice for you, that's a very beautiful gesture, even if you didn't particularly fancy that thing. Part of being mature is learning these things. That's why we are happy and grateful when a friend invites us for dinner. Not saying: "Hey! Don't cook anything I don't like! And anyway, I prefer eating take-out, so don't invite me!". It's not about the physical gift, it's not about the food or about the drink. It's about the human connection, and that is a very fragile thing. People forget these things in these hyper-materialistic and yes ego centrical times we live in. Gifts which you didn't want are easy to get rid off, just give them to somebody else.
    - colechristensen 1y ago
      "narcissist", "ego centrical", "very beautiful gesture", "Part of being mature" Just tone it down. Nobody deserves the joy of giving you a gift if they don't want stuff, being so mad about it is selfish and lacking empathy. "Maturity", since you bring it up, is respecting somebody's preferences and not diagnosing them of a personality disorder because they don't want to participate in something the same way you do. When somebody says they don't want gifts, the correct response is not "you're a narcissist".
antonchekhov 1y ago
> [..] I can't imagine how useless an unthinking AI would be at this when my own family and friends who, and this is important, _know me_, can't find anything to get me that doesn't land in the above categories This is precisely the problem - an AI does not really "know" the recipient (set aside of what it means to "know" someone). The result is you get something just a bit more varied than the usual "He's a Guy - he'll love some Whiskey Stones, a Bacon-of-the-Month subscription, or a Beard Care Kit" advice. (Adjust for whatever target demographic.)
thewebguyd 1y ago
Same here. I have just about everything I would want/need. Anything else is niche that I wouldn't want anyone else buying for me anyway (because they don't know enough about the hobby/I want to choose it myself), or far too expensive beyond what I'd be comfortable receiving as a gift from a loved one (Sure, I'd love a Pro Display XDR, no I'm not going to ask anyone to buy me a $5,000 monitor as a holiday gift). Otherwise, my living and offices spaces are sparse and minimal, I already have all the art, decor, or knick-knacks I'd ever want or need, and I generally despise clutter. I tell everyone, want to get me a gift? Let's go do something together. Let's go out to dinner, or go on a day hike, etc.

amelius 1y ago

So true. Note that advertising also makes us over-consume. Technology is great, but it's also great for greedy people.

hathawsh 1y ago

While I agree with you in principle (people should do their own thinking if they want gifts to be genuine), I thought I would go ahead and see how well Gemini can advise someone on choosing a gift for you. https://gemini.google.com/share/88b694a09a89 https://gemini.google.com/share/88b694a09a89 The advice seems very good. What do you think? A donation to EFF or an open source project, a rare book, or handcrafted headphones seem like a good start for someone who can't afford anything extravagant.

PcChip 1y ago
Handcrafted headphones? I’m interested…
foobarian 1y ago
> handcrafted headphones "I wound the coils myself!"
- hathawsh 1y ago
  Yeah, that was a little joke I slipped in, but OTOH, I've seen headphone kits that used 3D printed parts and it's not difficult to imagine someone replacing the 3D printed parts with handcrafted wood.
  - foobarian 1y ago
    And at the same time it's a not uncommon activity especially around university physics labs to wind various purpose-built magnets and transformers with exotic shapes.
AndrewKemendo 1y ago
This seems like a really solid list Also people keep confusing the response in the table because they are missing the “or”: Niche Tool or Sensory Item (Headphones) It’s not suggesting building headphones

foobarian 1y ago

I just train my family/potential gift givers to only consider consumables. That takes care of the clutter problem.

parpfish 1y ago
consumables are the way to go. as a receiver there's no long-term clutter or obligations. and depending on the type of consumable, there's the possible of getting to share/partake in it with the gift-giver and you've turned your consumable-gift into a no-obligation experience which is another nice type of clutter-free gift.
soco 11mo ago
I have heaps of jams, honey and candles. There are limits to the consumables as well. That, or people could think about diversifying consumables - although a lettuce head won't bring much Xmas spirit.

carlosjobim 1y ago

Gifts are not for your enjoyment, they are for the givers enjoyment. Don't take your loved ones for granted, because if you keep acting egocentrically towards them, they will one by one get tired of you.

colechristensen 1y ago
Not liking "stuff" culture doesn't make you a narcissist. Giving for your own pleasure and getting mad when you don't get the reaction you wanted... one of the most narcissistic behaviors is frequently accusing others of it.
- carlosjobim 1y ago
  And that's not what I said either (even though I used the word narcissist first), that he has to like the gifts. Putting yourself above others is what makes your actions ego centrical. When somebody does something nice for you, that's a very beautiful gesture, even if you didn't particularly fancy that thing. Part of being mature is learning these things. That's why we are happy and grateful when a friend invites us for dinner. Not saying: "Hey! Don't cook anything I don't like! And anyway, I prefer eating take-out, so don't invite me!". It's not about the physical gift, it's not about the food or about the drink. It's about the human connection, and that is a very fragile thing. People forget these things in these hyper-materialistic and yes ego centrical times we live in. Gifts which you didn't want are easy to get rid off, just give them to somebody else.
  - colechristensen 1y ago
    "narcissist", "ego centrical", "very beautiful gesture", "Part of being mature" Just tone it down. Nobody deserves the joy of giving you a gift if they don't want stuff, being so mad about it is selfish and lacking empathy. "Maturity", since you bring it up, is respecting somebody's preferences and not diagnosing them of a personality disorder because they don't want to participate in something the same way you do. When somebody says they don't want gifts, the correct response is not "you're a narcissist".

antonchekhov 1y ago

> [..] I can't imagine how useless an unthinking AI would be at this when my own family and friends who, and this is important, _know me_, can't find anything to get me that doesn't land in the above categories This is precisely the problem - an AI does not really "know" the recipient (set aside of what it means to "know" someone). The result is you get something just a bit more varied than the usual "He's a Guy - he'll love some Whiskey Stones, a Bacon-of-the-Month subscription, or a Beard Care Kit" advice. (Adjust for whatever target demographic.)

thewebguyd 1y ago

Same here. I have just about everything I would want/need. Anything else is niche that I wouldn't want anyone else buying for me anyway (because they don't know enough about the hobby/I want to choose it myself), or far too expensive beyond what I'd be comfortable receiving as a gift from a loved one (Sure, I'd love a Pro Display XDR, no I'm not going to ask anyone to buy me a $5,000 monitor as a holiday gift). Otherwise, my living and offices spaces are sparse and minimal, I already have all the art, decor, or knick-knacks I'd ever want or need, and I generally despise clutter. I tell everyone, want to get me a gift? Let's go do something together. Let's go out to dinner, or go on a day hike, etc.