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Ivy League psychologist: 'Bring your whole self to work' is bad advice
- wasitwrongto 1y agoWas it wrong to not keep any personal mementos on my desk, as a no-benefits contractor in software in a civilian hospital? (10 years before COVID-19)
- aydyn 1y agoI mean if you want to go the extra mile, you could keep fake personal mementos that align and ingratiate yourself with the ingroup.
- wasitwrongto 1y agoA person shouldn't say things like this - re: interviewing with a swizzle stick in one's pocket and confetti in one's hair - if they are a manager: "George Carlin - Tell the boss (who's the boss)" https://youtube.com/watch?v=p5x7-0mR86A& https://youtube.com/watch?v=p5x7-0mR86A& I've had to hide laughter in probably almost every interview since learning of this approach to interviewing. CLI: Clean Language Interviewing: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clean_language_interviewing https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clean_language_interviewing I'm more of a three-hour workweek sort of manager.
- wasitwrongto 1y agoOn professional boundaries: "The Secret of My Success (1987)" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Secret_of_My_Success_(1987_film) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Secret_of_My_Success_(1987... Professional boundaries: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Professional_boundaries https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Professional_boundaries Metaphor: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metaphor https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metaphor
- harvey9 1y agoI never put personal mementos on my desk in any job regardless of employment type. Didn't know I was supposed to.
- carabiner 1y agoMillennials are the generation of chesterton's fence. We're just rediscovering professional work culture.
- readthenotes1 1y agoBut, sadly, probably not the tale of the fence
- y-c-o-m-b 1y agoHmm not sure I agree. I think we tend to be the centrist group in this duality. We give some flexibility in allowing people to "be themselves" while still holding them accountable to professionalism. I've held many different jobs in the past 20+ years, and that seems to be true anywhere I go. This makes sense because we were of working age before professional work culture changed to what we see today. We may have broken some of the older traditions and paved the way, but I don't think we're responsible for what you see today
- carabiner 1y agoWell, look at the time dependence. 20 years ago we were leftist, today centrist, tomorrow right wing. We're just following the same pattern but are the first to be wholly expressive on the internet about it.
- jawns 1y ago> People whose behavior and beliefs align with their company’s prevailing culture may benefit from sharing more about themselves at work, Chamorro-Premuzic says. > However, people who express “authentic” opinions that run counter to the group’s views may risk damaging their reputations or relationships. I feel bad for anyone who doesn't see this as obvious. I've seen a lot of folks celebrate that their work allows them to be their authentic selves, even though they're well aware that the same opportunity isn't afforded to those with disfavored views or characteristics.
- pinkmuffinere 1y agoDefinitely. In fact, I'll say it is the same in almost _every_ interpersonal relationship. I engage with my parents, grandparents, siblings, etc in specific ways that we have agreed we have overlap. Depending on the person, I soften my utopian ideals, my fascination with drugs, my progressive-ness, my math memes, even my accent when I talk. I don't think this is unhealthy, I think this is just what it means to be alive. I express my "authentic self" through my life as a whole, and it is probably witnessed by no individual person; only I can see / enjoy it.
- claytongulick 1y agoManners are the grease of society, as they say.
- oceanplexian 1y agoWhat a time it was to be alive before the Culture War (tm) in San Francisco. I worked at a household name tech company and you could draw a pie chart of Libertarian, (Self described) Communist, Progressive, Anarchists, and everything in between. Drugs weren't really controversial but you had an entire spectrum of personalities and drugs that were popular in different groups. Everyone kind of accepted each other to be honest.
- hyperliner 1y ago[dead]
- angryGhost 1y agoDisagree. You can be your authentic self and be respectful of a workplace environment
- card_zero 1y agoMy authentic self is in bed right now drinking cider, so no, I can't.
- mathgeek 1y agoSome people can, some can’t.
- vorpalhex 1y agoIt depends on your authentic self. I've known people who were just deeply genuinely nice people. Yeah they can go totally authentic and are entirely welcome. Hell they can invite themselves over for dinner to my house and I'll be happy about it. My authentic self is sharply sarcastic, critical and at times brutal. My coworkers don't want to deal with that - that's a very chaffing personality especially towards the end of a stressful week and it can very genuinely hurt morale. I very much tone myself down, avoid sarcasm as much as I can, carefully massage critical and direct messaging as best I can and generally try to be aware that the people around me have different communication needs. And I think people do get a taste of the real person under the facade. I know I get that from my coworkers - I have coworkers who are great coworkers but whose friend I have no interest in being because same thing, their "out of work" authentic self I find off-putting even though they are amazing coworkers.
- lm28469 1y agoHaving worked with people from all around the world what you think is respectful and normal might be seen as batshit insane to others.
- f1shy 1y agoIf I could only make this comment more visible. I worked in 2 extrema of the spectrum. Ones would say nothing personal, strictly professional, never curse, like robots (any experience in Japan) The others would come, curse constantly, even calling a college would imply calling him literally “you son of a b*”, people would loudly talk about sexual encounters, and other private things (south Italy, south America). I asked both groups (as I have friends in both camps) what do they think about the other way of interacting: both think the other group is abnormal, awkward, and would not like to work in “such a terrible place”
- narcindin 1y agoBring your whole self to work, at this point, is the term you use to criticize this policy, not to describe it. Maternity leave is a version of BYWSTW. As are PRIDE/ethnicity related activities as work. Should we jettison those? I agree it can and is taken to far, but I'd prefer to read an article about actually navigating an office with different types of real people. For example, for example, thermostats preferences, volume preferences, "we a family/team" vs "just a job" preferences, etc.
- onionisafruit 1y agoThat's not what the article is about.
- zoklet-enjoyer 1y agoIf you're doing your job and not being an asshole to the people you work with, then you're welcome on my team.
- hyperliner 1y ago[dead]
- snozolli 1y agoI have never in my life heard anyone use this phrase. Is it actually common in modern, corporate America? It sounds like an HR trap, just like anonymous suggestion boxes.
- politelemon 1y agoDefinitely heard it in several US and European firms. Quite possibly spread through linked in contamination.
- nemomarx 1y agoYeah, it's pretty common. A little less so this year than back in 2021 I would say
- only-one1701 1y agoVery much around and very much an HR trap
- hexbin010 1y agoIf there was ever an "it's a trap", it's bringing your whole self to work/being completely honest/being completely yourself/forgetting it's a game
- only-one1701 1y agoNo shit?
- jpitz 1y agoTo every commenter offering incredulity or sarcasm at the apparent obviousness of this advice: A great swath of us did not possess the social intelligence to arrive at this conclusion independently upon our arrival in the workforce. I didn't. I got lucky.
- BeFlatXIII 1y agoDid it really take someone with Ivy League training to figure this out?
- tennisflyi 1y agoI does indeed. Look at “gemba” lmao
- RickJWagner 1y agoI agree. Some topics are by nature divisive— these things should not be discussed in the workplace. Politics, religion, etc are best kept outside the work environment.
- fittingopposite 1y ago> “You’re never going to get a job if you do that,” he says. Can't really take this person serious if they can't differentiate a bit. People using the words "never", "always", etc. often generalize too much to really describe reality as it is.