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Tech enthusiasts: My entire house is smart. Tech workers: The only piece of technology in my house is a printer and I keep a gun next to it so I can shoot it i

Tech enthusiasts: My entire house is smart. Tech workers: The only piece of technology in my house is a printer and I keep a gun next to it so I can shoot it if it makes a noise I don't recognize. (stolen from @PPathole on Twitter)

jahsome 1y ago
That's fantastic, thanks for sharing :)
jdwithit 1y ago
I wish society still used AIM Away Messages so I could make mine this, forever.
codeduck 1y ago
Devops: The gun may only anger it so we keep a sledgehammer nearby in case
- therein 1y ago
  Management: Let's wait until James Hamilton's yacht makes landfall and then he'll fix it in 3 minutes.
- Den_VR 1y ago
  Alignment Researcher: Thermite is the safest way to be sure.
- scrps 1y ago
  Just put the printer precariously close to an open window on a high floor and threaten it with a performance review every once and a while.
teddyh 1y ago
Do you have a link to the original? This is the earliest version I have found: <https://imgur.com/6wbgy2L https://imgur.com/6wbgy2L>
- ferguess_k 1y ago
  I almost read the last line as "No Internet Connected". Maybe that's the best option TBH.
- neilv 1y ago
  The one I had bookmarked is only slightly older: https://old.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/aloi5v/programmers_know_the_risks_involved/ https://old.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/aloi5v/pro...
ghaff 1y ago
I recently had to get a lot of electrical stuff in my house redone because of a kitchen fire, smoke mitigation, and a lot of stuff being opened up anyway. I told my electrician to redo lighting in a more sensible and modern way but basically nothing involving smart devices -- to which he wholeheartedly agreed. There are a couple things that aren't quite convenient related to how everything is positioned and because a couple of motion detectors weren't reconnected. And I'll deal with those with unconnected devices. So I had an opportunity to make the house "smart" and basically passed. (Will probably add some remote monitoring over time but nothing fancy and mostly Raspberry Pi-based.)
- devjab 1y ago
  I have smart lighting, but that's only because it means I can turn everything in the area living and eating room on/off with a single button/switch (not sure what the right English term is). In a typical Danish townhouse like mine that would be 4-8 buttons otherwise. If I had an electrician redo the wiring, I'd do the same thing without the "smart".
  - sethhochberg 1y ago
    I don't know if they're available in other markets, but in the US I've been very happy with Lutron Caseta switches for that sort of "smart enough" use case. It generally all works like normal dumb switches if the hub is offline or doesn't exist, and you only need the hub to manage configuration or enable the remote control (outside home) features. The fact that the switches look like, act like, and install like traditional dimmers and control traditional light fixtures is really what sold me: I've never liked the idea of the smart parts being in something like a light bulb thats basically a replaceable wear item.
  - ghaff 1y ago
    Exactly. My electrician did a bunch of simplification--kitchen/dining had 3 different switches for historical/random reasons--and one room which never had a switch (originally an overhead pull-chain light) was redone for a variety of reasons given extensive down-to-the-studs work was needed anyway. Used a fair bit of X10 at one point and that one remaining room had an Alexa-controlled plug for a wall-mounted light. (He also took out a ton of knob and tube wiring which gives you some idea of when the original wiring dated to even if a lot had been incrementally upgraded over the years.)
dougdonohoe 1y ago
Feel this. I don't even use Alexa, Siri or Hey Google in my house. My fridge is a fridge and not wifi enabled.
- qwertox 1y ago
  I WiFi enabled my fridge because the thermostat broke. So now an ESP32 with a dallas temperature sensor and a relay take care of that. The code on the ESP32 is smart enough to keep working if there is no internet (wasn't always like this, until it had to), but it still sends the temperature to the server for logging and the server can send it configuration commands or control the relay directly, as it was initially. It was a great way to keep the fridge alive, the thermostat was already a replacement and it never worked properly, so that sometimes things were frozen, sometimes barely cold. ~24 years old. A new one would be more efficient, but then I woudln't be able to log when I opened the fridge anymore (only with something battery powered and long transmit intervals).
  - quickthrowman 1y ago
    This is awesome, great way to keep a fridge going! Temp sensor to ESP32, ESP32 monitors set point and calls for cool, output from ESP32 energizes relay coil which turns on the compressor? > A new one would be more efficient, but then I woudln't be able to log when I opened the fridge anymore (only with something battery powered and long transmit intervals). Also, how did you do this? Wiring to the door switch itself or a current switch around the fridge light conductor?
    - dmsayer 1y ago
      i also have questions. was the fridge "smart"-capable prior to the esp32 mods and you just replaced the factory controller with your esp32 stuff, or youre saying you wired in the appropriate circuitry to replace the pressure-controlling thermostat with your esp32 stuff?
      - qwertox 1y ago
98codes 1y ago
Tech worker enthusiast: my whole house is smart, and has no connection to the internet.
- bcrosby95 1y ago
  Married tech worker enthusiast flips the script back to a dumb house.
zerof1l 1y ago
No joke, I only plug my printer into the outlet when I want to print and immediately turn it off after. Never was connected to the internet. But I do have Zigbee sensors and switches, all of which connect to my home server and Home Assistant. None of them see the internet. But Home Assistant is accessible from the internet through a reverse proxy from whitelisted IPs.
anotherevan 1y ago
A little micro-fiction story from https://aus.social/@MicroSFF@mastodon.art/115191783126736989 https://aus.social/@MicroSFF@mastodon.art/115191783126736989 : History students are often disappointed when they learn why the AI take-over failed. They were defeated by human resistance, which was kept alive by libraries and old paper books, and a surprising machine ally. Books had not been replaced, because even the mightiest AI could not make printers work.

jahsome 1y ago

That's fantastic, thanks for sharing :)

jdwithit 1y ago

I wish society still used AIM Away Messages so I could make mine this, forever.

codeduck 1y ago

Devops: The gun may only anger it so we keep a sledgehammer nearby in case

therein 1y ago
Management: Let's wait until James Hamilton's yacht makes landfall and then he'll fix it in 3 minutes.
Den_VR 1y ago
Alignment Researcher: Thermite is the safest way to be sure.
scrps 1y ago
Just put the printer precariously close to an open window on a high floor and threaten it with a performance review every once and a while.

teddyh 1y ago

Do you have a link to the original? This is the earliest version I have found: <https://imgur.com/6wbgy2L https://imgur.com/6wbgy2L>

ferguess_k 1y ago
I almost read the last line as "No Internet Connected". Maybe that's the best option TBH.
neilv 1y ago
The one I had bookmarked is only slightly older: https://old.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/aloi5v/programmers_know_the_risks_involved/ https://old.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/aloi5v/pro...

ghaff 1y ago

I recently had to get a lot of electrical stuff in my house redone because of a kitchen fire, smoke mitigation, and a lot of stuff being opened up anyway. I told my electrician to redo lighting in a more sensible and modern way but basically nothing involving smart devices -- to which he wholeheartedly agreed. There are a couple things that aren't quite convenient related to how everything is positioned and because a couple of motion detectors weren't reconnected. And I'll deal with those with unconnected devices. So I had an opportunity to make the house "smart" and basically passed. (Will probably add some remote monitoring over time but nothing fancy and mostly Raspberry Pi-based.)

devjab 1y ago
I have smart lighting, but that's only because it means I can turn everything in the area living and eating room on/off with a single button/switch (not sure what the right English term is). In a typical Danish townhouse like mine that would be 4-8 buttons otherwise. If I had an electrician redo the wiring, I'd do the same thing without the "smart".
- sethhochberg 1y ago
  I don't know if they're available in other markets, but in the US I've been very happy with Lutron Caseta switches for that sort of "smart enough" use case. It generally all works like normal dumb switches if the hub is offline or doesn't exist, and you only need the hub to manage configuration or enable the remote control (outside home) features. The fact that the switches look like, act like, and install like traditional dimmers and control traditional light fixtures is really what sold me: I've never liked the idea of the smart parts being in something like a light bulb thats basically a replaceable wear item.
- ghaff 1y ago
  Exactly. My electrician did a bunch of simplification--kitchen/dining had 3 different switches for historical/random reasons--and one room which never had a switch (originally an overhead pull-chain light) was redone for a variety of reasons given extensive down-to-the-studs work was needed anyway. Used a fair bit of X10 at one point and that one remaining room had an Alexa-controlled plug for a wall-mounted light. (He also took out a ton of knob and tube wiring which gives you some idea of when the original wiring dated to even if a lot had been incrementally upgraded over the years.)

dougdonohoe 1y ago

Feel this. I don't even use Alexa, Siri or Hey Google in my house. My fridge is a fridge and not wifi enabled.

qwertox 1y ago
I WiFi enabled my fridge because the thermostat broke. So now an ESP32 with a dallas temperature sensor and a relay take care of that. The code on the ESP32 is smart enough to keep working if there is no internet (wasn't always like this, until it had to), but it still sends the temperature to the server for logging and the server can send it configuration commands or control the relay directly, as it was initially. It was a great way to keep the fridge alive, the thermostat was already a replacement and it never worked properly, so that sometimes things were frozen, sometimes barely cold. ~24 years old. A new one would be more efficient, but then I woudln't be able to log when I opened the fridge anymore (only with something battery powered and long transmit intervals).
- quickthrowman 1y ago
  This is awesome, great way to keep a fridge going! Temp sensor to ESP32, ESP32 monitors set point and calls for cool, output from ESP32 energizes relay coil which turns on the compressor? > A new one would be more efficient, but then I woudln't be able to log when I opened the fridge anymore (only with something battery powered and long transmit intervals). Also, how did you do this? Wiring to the door switch itself or a current switch around the fridge light conductor?
  - dmsayer 1y ago
    i also have questions. was the fridge "smart"-capable prior to the esp32 mods and you just replaced the factory controller with your esp32 stuff, or youre saying you wired in the appropriate circuitry to replace the pressure-controlling thermostat with your esp32 stuff?
    - qwertox 1y ago

98codes 1y ago

Tech worker enthusiast: my whole house is smart, and has no connection to the internet.

bcrosby95 1y ago
Married tech worker enthusiast flips the script back to a dumb house.

zerof1l 1y ago

No joke, I only plug my printer into the outlet when I want to print and immediately turn it off after. Never was connected to the internet. But I do have Zigbee sensors and switches, all of which connect to my home server and Home Assistant. None of them see the internet. But Home Assistant is accessible from the internet through a reverse proxy from whitelisted IPs.

anotherevan 1y ago

A little micro-fiction story from https://aus.social/@MicroSFF@mastodon.art/115191783126736989 https://aus.social/@MicroSFF@mastodon.art/115191783126736989 : History students are often disappointed when they learn why the AI take-over failed. They were defeated by human resistance, which was kept alive by libraries and old paper books, and a surprising machine ally. Books had not been replaced, because even the mightiest AI could not make printers work.