6 ms·

there's a third: everyone wants to feel special and also takes any excuse to not have to work on their flawed habits

by rf15 1y ago

zug_zug 1y ago
There's an odd presumption there... It sounds like you're presuming those who put a label on themselves don't want to change themselves at all; one could also imagine that those who put a label on themselves want to change themselves most of all
- zakki 1y ago
  >>>who put a label on themselves don't want to change themselves at all<<< Maybe that wasn't the intention but label does shape perception.
- rf15 1y ago
  Those who see and believe that there's a label to parts of them can easily believe that they're "helpless", and "that's just the way I am"
  - pseudalopex 1y ago
    Those who do not see or do not believe a label can easily believe that's just the way they are. Those who see and believe a label can easily use it to identify what they can do to help themselves.
    - DisruptiveDave 1y ago
      the ol' "name and tame"
  - const_cast 1y ago
    > "helpless", and "that's just the way I am" These don't mean the same thing. You can be the thing you are and not be helpless. For example, if you have ADHD that's just a part of who you are. That doesn't mean you can't take medication or form processes to help yourself and mitigate the effects of ADHD. Also, in my experience, people who choose to never label themselves are not better off. They typically do have some sort of condition, sometimes multiple, and they actively choose to do nothing about it because they're in extreme denial. I see this with parents all the time. "My kids doesn't have ADHD! Stop trying to label him!". Okay great, but little Timmy is about to flunk out at fucking third grade. Let's do something about it.
Mtinie 1y ago
Alternatively, society is broken.
- nradov 1y ago
  Every society has always been broken and always will be broken in certain ways. For most people, recognizing that isn't actionable. But they can change themselves.
kelseyfrog 1y ago
I don't see how this explanation doesn't also fall victim to wanting to feel special. It looks a lot like projecting in fact :/ cringe

there's a third: everyone wants to feel special and also takes any excuse to not have to work on their flawed habits

by rf15 1y ago

there's a third: everyone wants to feel special and also takes any excuse to not have to work on their flawed habits

There's an odd presumption there... It sounds like you're presuming those who put a label on themselves don't want to change themselves at all; one could also imagine that those who put a label on themselves want to change themselves most of all

zakki 1y ago
>>>who put a label on themselves don't want to change themselves at all<<< Maybe that wasn't the intention but label does shape perception.
rf15 1y ago
Those who see and believe that there's a label to parts of them can easily believe that they're "helpless", and "that's just the way I am"
- pseudalopex 1y ago
  Those who do not see or do not believe a label can easily believe that's just the way they are. Those who see and believe a label can easily use it to identify what they can do to help themselves.
  - DisruptiveDave 1y ago
    the ol' "name and tame"
- const_cast 1y ago
  > "helpless", and "that's just the way I am" These don't mean the same thing. You can be the thing you are and not be helpless. For example, if you have ADHD that's just a part of who you are. That doesn't mean you can't take medication or form processes to help yourself and mitigate the effects of ADHD. Also, in my experience, people who choose to never label themselves are not better off. They typically do have some sort of condition, sometimes multiple, and they actively choose to do nothing about it because they're in extreme denial. I see this with parents all the time. "My kids doesn't have ADHD! Stop trying to label him!". Okay great, but little Timmy is about to flunk out at fucking third grade. Let's do something about it.

Mtinie 1y ago

Alternatively, society is broken.

nradov 1y ago
Every society has always been broken and always will be broken in certain ways. For most people, recognizing that isn't actionable. But they can change themselves.

kelseyfrog 1y ago

I don't see how this explanation doesn't also fall victim to wanting to feel special. It looks a lot like projecting in fact :/ cringe