4 ms·

That's actually kinda sad you lost friends. I feel like that should be a priority?

Papazsazsa 1y ago
Your (reasonable, human) sadness over lost friends is precisely the moat these companies use to keep you trapped in their ecosystems.
- deleted 1y ago
  [deleted]
- lifty 1y ago
  You sound like Data from StarTrek. You too, with enough observation, will understand the importance of feelings to humans.
  - hsbauauvhabzb 1y ago
    Pointing out that it’s a business tactic abused by the company to stay relevant and having feelings aren’t mutually exclusive.
  - Papazsazsa 1y ago
    I am a big Data fan and take this as a compliment ;)
  - goku12 1y ago
    The context makes a big difference here. Human connections are indeed very important. But people used to manage those satisfactorily even before the advent of instant long-range communication systems. They still managed to keep each other updated and alerted about important events. Today's digital interpersonal connections feel important more because of the fear of losing them, than because of their actual worth. I realized this after having switched my communication media (chat apps, phone numbers, etc) numerous times. Many connections drop off in the process. But people with relations that truly matter always find a way to reestablish it. That flexibility gives you the freedom to chose the communications platform according to your self-interests. And in today's targeted ads economy, those self-interests matter too much to neglect in favor of staying connected with everyone.
    - jrowen 1y ago
      But people used to manage those satisfactorily even before the advent of instant long-range communication systems. They still managed to keep each other updated and alerted about important events. There's got to be a logical fallacy for "people did x before y technology." Yes they did. And we still collectively found out that we could do it better with that thing, and that is the new standard. But you're free to go back to delivering letters by horse if that suits you. I can post a story on Instagram, and somebody that I have't talked to in years might reply and we have a conversation and reconnect, or maybe it's just a simple gesture, but it's still meaningful and appreciated. But if I said "well I'm here on Mastodon now and anyone who truly matters will come find me," that's just not happening. And then I'm frustrated and complain about being lonely and yell at everyone to switch to Mastodon. Really bringing people together. But at least I didn't have to stomach seeing an ad that might actually pertain to my signaled interests.
jrowen 1y ago
Losing friends over choice of messaging app is crazy work.
- shafyy 1y ago
  I also ditched WhatsApp long ago. And while I probably "lost" a few connections with people I knew from other countries, I stay managed to stay in touch with people who are important to me. Either because they downloaded Signal just to talk to me (I have a few friends who like to emphasize passive aggressively that every time we talk, LOL), or use Apple Messages, SMS or good old email.
- gausswho 1y ago
  I can relate to the loss. It's one directional. One side slowly forgets there's anything other than what Facebook properties puts in front of them.
  - jrowen 1y ago
    I can relate to the common man that's just never been able to muster up the energy to give a crap. I use what the people I know use. I've felt way more annoyance towards that one friend using some obscure platform than I ever have about Mark Zuckberg "sharing my data." Truly two kinds of people on this issue.
CactusRocket 1y ago
I would say that depends on how strong the friendships are, and how strong your morals/beliefs are.
smokel 1y ago
Facebook used to designate the 1,000+ people you incidentally talked to as "friends." I think the term does not have the same meaning for everyone.
kseistrup 1y ago
Yes, it is kind of sad. I did give said friends (who were strictly online friends in faraway countries that I had never met in “real life”) the option of a handful of other instant messaging means of reaching me, and I also made sure to convey that the reason was my zero-tolerance for Facebook/Meta and not because I wanted to ditch them as friends. I have also tried to reach out through email and sms, and didn't get a response, so that's where it landed.
renewiltord 1y ago
Some people just won't notice your message and then they'll forget to download and setup the app. It's normal. People have lives distinct from the messaging. I'm pretty actively involved with my friends and just have the union of all messaging apps and even I frequently forget to respond to messages I've started to read because something else happens: baby cries etc

Your (reasonable, human) sadness over lost friends is precisely the moat these companies use to keep you trapped in their ecosystems.

deleted 1y ago
[deleted]
lifty 1y ago
You sound like Data from StarTrek. You too, with enough observation, will understand the importance of feelings to humans.
- hsbauauvhabzb 1y ago
  Pointing out that it’s a business tactic abused by the company to stay relevant and having feelings aren’t mutually exclusive.
- Papazsazsa 1y ago
  I am a big Data fan and take this as a compliment ;)
- goku12 1y ago
  The context makes a big difference here. Human connections are indeed very important. But people used to manage those satisfactorily even before the advent of instant long-range communication systems. They still managed to keep each other updated and alerted about important events. Today's digital interpersonal connections feel important more because of the fear of losing them, than because of their actual worth. I realized this after having switched my communication media (chat apps, phone numbers, etc) numerous times. Many connections drop off in the process. But people with relations that truly matter always find a way to reestablish it. That flexibility gives you the freedom to chose the communications platform according to your self-interests. And in today's targeted ads economy, those self-interests matter too much to neglect in favor of staying connected with everyone.
  - jrowen 1y ago
    But people used to manage those satisfactorily even before the advent of instant long-range communication systems. They still managed to keep each other updated and alerted about important events. There's got to be a logical fallacy for "people did x before y technology." Yes they did. And we still collectively found out that we could do it better with that thing, and that is the new standard. But you're free to go back to delivering letters by horse if that suits you. I can post a story on Instagram, and somebody that I have't talked to in years might reply and we have a conversation and reconnect, or maybe it's just a simple gesture, but it's still meaningful and appreciated. But if I said "well I'm here on Mastodon now and anyone who truly matters will come find me," that's just not happening. And then I'm frustrated and complain about being lonely and yell at everyone to switch to Mastodon. Really bringing people together. But at least I didn't have to stomach seeing an ad that might actually pertain to my signaled interests.

jrowen 1y ago

Losing friends over choice of messaging app is crazy work.

shafyy 1y ago
I also ditched WhatsApp long ago. And while I probably "lost" a few connections with people I knew from other countries, I stay managed to stay in touch with people who are important to me. Either because they downloaded Signal just to talk to me (I have a few friends who like to emphasize passive aggressively that every time we talk, LOL), or use Apple Messages, SMS or good old email.
gausswho 1y ago
I can relate to the loss. It's one directional. One side slowly forgets there's anything other than what Facebook properties puts in front of them.
- jrowen 1y ago
  I can relate to the common man that's just never been able to muster up the energy to give a crap. I use what the people I know use. I've felt way more annoyance towards that one friend using some obscure platform than I ever have about Mark Zuckberg "sharing my data." Truly two kinds of people on this issue.

CactusRocket 1y ago

I would say that depends on how strong the friendships are, and how strong your morals/beliefs are.

smokel 1y ago

Facebook used to designate the 1,000+ people you incidentally talked to as "friends." I think the term does not have the same meaning for everyone.

kseistrup 1y ago

Yes, it is kind of sad. I did give said friends (who were strictly online friends in faraway countries that I had never met in “real life”) the option of a handful of other instant messaging means of reaching me, and I also made sure to convey that the reason was my zero-tolerance for Facebook/Meta and not because I wanted to ditch them as friends. I have also tried to reach out through email and sms, and didn't get a response, so that's where it landed.

renewiltord 1y ago

Some people just won't notice your message and then they'll forget to download and setup the app. It's normal. People have lives distinct from the messaging. I'm pretty actively involved with my friends and just have the union of all messaging apps and even I frequently forget to respond to messages I've started to read because something else happens: baby cries etc