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Today I learned there is a national database (for now) so you can bypass and file appropriately. That is nice. I’m happy op got somewhat whole again. But that

Today I learned there is a national database (for now) so you can bypass and file appropriately. That is nice. I’m happy op got somewhat whole again. But that sucks, luckily I’ve been able to just do U-Haul solo but lately (also facing a move) man - it is tiresome the older you get.

SoftTalker 1y ago
Honestly the best way to move is to sell or donate everything and buy new for your new place. Get down to suitcases or stuff you can pack and ship via UPS. Yeah some stuff has sentimental value but try to get past that as much as you can. It’s just stuff. When my uncle moved when he retired he took what would fit in his car. I have never gotten that lean but I admire him for it.
- the__alchemist 1y ago
  This is very situational. Many people have tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars of items, especially furniture.
  - wyclif 1y ago
    It is very situational—I get that. But the fact of the matter is that most people have way too much stuff. This creates a huge amount of problems and headaches if you have to move.
    - ghaff 1y ago
      Most of us here can probably agree that moving is a very good time to assess a lot of property. Much of which you probably were given/acquired at some time or another and really don't use. I had a fairy minor (in the scheme of things) kitchen fire earlier this year. (Not my fault. Microwave burst into flames in the middle of the night.) Most of the contents are probably salvageable (or determined best replaced under replacement policy). But I intend to be fairly discriminating as I move stuff back into the house. I had already started doing some sorting and donating/chucking bu this will accelerate it.
    - the__alchemist 1y ago
      We're on the same page! I agree, and pine for the days before I acquired too many things. The contrast is observation: Most people I know, myself included, do not live that minimal life style. I know someone who does; he lives in a van and loves it; owns few physical belongings, and most are in storage. He's the exception; not the rule. Personally, I have a molecular bio lab at home; I know (had to calculate for tax purposes) that it cost ~12000 USD including reagents, shipping costs etc. I have a nice 3D printer, loads of tools, a well-stocked electronics lab etc. All see regular use. A few pieces of oak furniture. I know that my personal hobbies are weird (Maybe not for this crowd?!), but many people have comparably equipment-bound ones. Now, picture being married to someone with a comparable set of items (Furniture doesn't double of course), and kids...
  - SoftTalker 1y ago
    He paid $14k for the movers. That would buy a fair bit of new furniture unless it’s really high end.
    - the__alchemist 1y ago
      I see many scenarios where the items would add up to less than this. I see more where it doesn't. e.g.: What you say makes sense for a single person who owns a PC, a TV, and Ikea + amazon furniture. Now imagine a couple or family, who's been (criticize the capitalist/consumer culture or not) buying nice wood furniture, has a well-stocked kitchen, multiple computers, hobby equipment etc. I encourage you to run a rough estimate of your own household's items. Do the same for your a neighbor's; a friend's.
      - throwaway173738 1y ago
        My nice wood furniture has had three owners and is almost 70 years old, so I certainly think it’s possible to own nice things and not be a wasteful consumerist.
        RHSeeger 1y ago
        I built my living room coffee table by hand with my father, who is now dead. I built my shop table by hand (to match the one my father had). Even ignoring the 10s of thousand of dollars it would cost me to refurnish a house to match what I have now (and the staggering amount of time finding suitable replacements), there just a ton of things I could never replace.
      - SoftTalker 1y ago
        And yet when you die, the contents of your house (for inheritance purposes) will most likely be valued at under $10K and nobody will raise an eyebrow at that.
        compiler-guy 1y ago
        When I die, my body will be worth a pittance. But I still value it far more than that now.
  - B-Con 1y ago
    For me it isn't about the cost as much as it is that I've tailored my possessions to be what I like. If I have it, it brings value, and I probably like the details enough that it's hard to replace without getting an exact replica.
- Der_Einzige 1y ago
  [flagged]
  - autoexec 1y ago
    It'd be a huge gamble. Many things can't be replaced. Mostly you'll be forced to get "similar" things. Different manufactures. Different model numbers. Enshittification means that you'll often be stuck with something much worse than what you had. With prices about to skyrocket and shelves about to be empty thanks to tariffs, mismanagement of the economy, and pissing off the people we depend on for nearly everything we have you'd have to be crazy to throw out everything you have and assume you'll save money buying new replacements for everything you lost.
  - subscribed 1y ago
    They are NOT suggesting downsizing, entirely sensible practice. They say to sell everything except what can fit in one briefcase, and to buy all that stuff new in the new place. Super time consuming and expensive. I don't want someone's used bed or used sofa, so I'll have to buy new. Almost everything depreciates with time, so you're looking at a house of the good, usable stuff that can be sold or donated for a fraction of the price over the course of weeks (in the meanwhile you can wash your family clothes in the river and eat out), and then spend weeks buying brand new stuff (I'm not sure if either of you knows how much the household equipment costs). You're both likely talking from the perspective of the single małe loving in the small furnished flat and moving to another furnished flat. In that one edge case selling everything and buying new may work. (just don't move the goalposts: you're effectively discussing with the stance no one took, because no one was arguing downsizing)
    - Der_Einzige 1y ago
      [flagged]
      - iamacyborg 1y ago
        > My wife won’t agree though because women hate minimalism they are obsessed with trinkets, do-dads, and Knick-knacks. (see women’s reactions to young men living with only TV and couch meme on the internet) That’s not minimalism, it’s being a slob. Minimalism implies thought and precision, which is pretty much the opposite of the posts you’re referring to
- barbazoo 1y ago
  That sounds super wasteful.
- pclmulqdq 1y ago
  Yes, next time I move I will sell or donate my $100,000 piano and simply buy a new one in the new place.
  - zeroonetwothree 1y ago
    Or just don’t have one? Most people don’t own $100,000 pianos and somehow they make do.
    - codedokode 1y ago
      I am sure most people wouldn't refuse to have a $100 000 piano if they had space for it.
    - glitchcrab 1y ago
      But they do have one, so your point is moot.
    - iamacyborg 1y ago
      What a weird take.
    - rwallace 1y ago
      Eh. I mean, I don't have a piano, but I think a world in which no one ever does anything that can't be done on a laptop computer, would not be a better place.
    - pclmulqdq 1y ago
      If you take the ratio of amount of time I play my piano to the TCO of my piano, I am expecting to spend something like $2-5 TCO / hour of entertainment (without considering resale value in ~30 years) over my life. That is a ratio that is better than most forms of entertainment. It rivals computer games, which are also pretty good on TCO / hour of enjoyment. That is even the case with a very high-end instrument. Perhaps more people should have things like pianos.
  - Der_Einzige 1y ago
    A guy near me literally gave away a Steinway piano. Like, a real one worth at least 8K (verified it online). Me being too slow to get it is one of my great regrets in life.
- TuringNYC 1y ago
  >> Honestly the best way to move is to sell or donate everything and buy new for your new place. One problem is the delays on new furniture. I saw delays of 6-14 weeks on furniture when I last moved. I purchased a kitchen island from Ashley Furniture in 2021 which has still not fully arrived (the side-pieces are still pending in 2025) even though payments started as soon as the first item was shipped. Also, you may find that furniture prices in 2025 are not what they were when you last moved given inflation.
  - ghaff 1y ago
    I had a kitchen fire recently with all the associated smoke damage mitigation. One of the "leave it where it is" commands I gave was a good sofa (that I bought second hand off my brother) which I really liked and (almost) perfectly fit in the space. One of those things where I was probably just over some threshold of various processes (and insurance coverages) kicking in though not really necessary for a lot of things. Pushed back on some and will see how successfully at the end of the day. One problem is that no one is incentivized to save you a lot of inconvenience and a year of living in a house that's not really set up yet.
- idiotsecant 1y ago
  Yes. It's a cliche but it's true. Your stuff owns you.
- subscribed 1y ago
  I ordered by new sofa in February. I expect it in May. It's just stuff you can or can't get. How would I know I can't get sofa? How much does assembling the furniture take? Do I book someone to help me with that or so I just pay for assembly? How much is the new mattress and why waste the old one, expensive and now destined to the skip? How much is going to cost me the living room equipment? Not much, two gaming consoles, TV, 7+2 setup with a decent, 8k, flexible AVR. Do I take the hit on buying the new motorcycle? Old, perfectly fine but a bit beaten bicycles will have to be thrown out as they look quite nasty (even though they ride well, in my currently 5th house), so it's a few grand on bicycles as well. Do I need to throw out my network equipment as well? I mean, I could probably sell it on ebay for a fraction of the value and buy new for 20 times what I'll get from my old one, then just get through the pain of setting new software anew... Etc, etc. I'm glad it works for you but it's laughable to offer your solution as a "best way to love" to everyone without knowing their circumstances.
- neom 1y ago
  I'm my 40s over here and in my life I've owned 3 full houses of...stuff, so much stuff, really nice stuff!!! Now I own almost nothing and life is much easier. I find the comments here really funny, now I am free I realize how trapped I was by my trappings, your uncle was a smart guy.
  - foobarian 1y ago
    There gets to be a point where you have to assert you own the stuff, not the other way around. And cull ruthlessly. It's hardest with a partner or if you grew up frugal and get hung up on "giving it away to good hands."
- kristjansson 1y ago
  At some life stages and situations, this makes total sense. I’d think those are predominantly when one is embarking on a new stage, and moving as a part of that. Graduations, retirement, marriage, divorce, … . But someone moving involuntarily (job change, new posting, …), perhaps with a partner, perhaps with children … it’s hard to begrudge that person bringing many of their things along to ease the transition. There’s a reason the US military pays for movers.
- southernplaces7 1y ago
  >Honestly the best way to move is to sell or donate everything and buy new for your new place. Get down to suitcases or stuff you can pack and ship via UPS The best way? Really? Perhaps if you're comfortable enough financially in a way that most people in the U.S, or even more so, the rest of the world are not. I mean, how wonderful if you have the discretionary budget to simply sell at a typical major discount or donate away most of your major physical possessions and just buy everything new. For many, many, if not most people, attempting such a thing would be a huge economic blow in addition to the already often heavy costs of moving. If some of the advice and observations often given on this site seem like naval-gazing, bubble-dwelling nonsense, it's due to laughable comments like this one.
- nunez 1y ago
  This works when you have cheap and/or limited furniture. Better/more expensive furniture is difficult to sell but also valuable enough to keep.
  - ghaff 1y ago
    Selling stuff, especially if you're well outside of a major city, is sort of tough. Yard sales don't really bring in the cash and take some work. Most people probably don't want the stuff you don't want and even selling that takes effort.
    - nunez 1y ago
      Right. You lose money _and_ time; the worst combination.
      - ghaff 1y ago
        My example is that I have a pile of laserdiscs that some retro collector probably wants but I'm not going to individually list them on ebay for $3 each. Maybe I'll put the whole package on Facebook for a few hundred and see if someone bites but that's about as far as I'll go. I do live at the end of a long driveway on a busy road and I've found that a good way to dump old lawn equipment and furniture for free.
- Glyptodon 1y ago
  If someone gave me replacement value for my stuff I would not have an issue with this. But realistically nobody is going to give $50k+ to replace all your furniture, electronics, dishes, tools, and so forth. And it only really adds up if you either (a) are wealthy enough that it's not a meaningful cost, or (b) barely have anything in the way of furniture and tools. It's also complicated by things like decently made shelves that aren't wildly expensive being much harder to find than 20 years ago. Like if I could get equivalent shelves adjusted for inflation donating and replacing them would be fine. But I literally can't - I can only find cheap crap or rather expensive stuff that's moderately nicer than my old stuff.
nunez 1y ago
Agreed. My wife and I did a move ourselves once. Never again. Movers ever time.

SoftTalker 1y ago

Honestly the best way to move is to sell or donate everything and buy new for your new place. Get down to suitcases or stuff you can pack and ship via UPS. Yeah some stuff has sentimental value but try to get past that as much as you can. It’s just stuff. When my uncle moved when he retired he took what would fit in his car. I have never gotten that lean but I admire him for it.

the__alchemist 1y ago
This is very situational. Many people have tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars of items, especially furniture.
- wyclif 1y ago
  It is very situational—I get that. But the fact of the matter is that most people have way too much stuff. This creates a huge amount of problems and headaches if you have to move.
  - ghaff 1y ago
    Most of us here can probably agree that moving is a very good time to assess a lot of property. Much of which you probably were given/acquired at some time or another and really don't use. I had a fairy minor (in the scheme of things) kitchen fire earlier this year. (Not my fault. Microwave burst into flames in the middle of the night.) Most of the contents are probably salvageable (or determined best replaced under replacement policy). But I intend to be fairly discriminating as I move stuff back into the house. I had already started doing some sorting and donating/chucking bu this will accelerate it.
  - the__alchemist 1y ago
    We're on the same page! I agree, and pine for the days before I acquired too many things. The contrast is observation: Most people I know, myself included, do not live that minimal life style. I know someone who does; he lives in a van and loves it; owns few physical belongings, and most are in storage. He's the exception; not the rule. Personally, I have a molecular bio lab at home; I know (had to calculate for tax purposes) that it cost ~12000 USD including reagents, shipping costs etc. I have a nice 3D printer, loads of tools, a well-stocked electronics lab etc. All see regular use. A few pieces of oak furniture. I know that my personal hobbies are weird (Maybe not for this crowd?!), but many people have comparably equipment-bound ones. Now, picture being married to someone with a comparable set of items (Furniture doesn't double of course), and kids...
- SoftTalker 1y ago
  He paid $14k for the movers. That would buy a fair bit of new furniture unless it’s really high end.
  - the__alchemist 1y ago
    I see many scenarios where the items would add up to less than this. I see more where it doesn't. e.g.: What you say makes sense for a single person who owns a PC, a TV, and Ikea + amazon furniture. Now imagine a couple or family, who's been (criticize the capitalist/consumer culture or not) buying nice wood furniture, has a well-stocked kitchen, multiple computers, hobby equipment etc. I encourage you to run a rough estimate of your own household's items. Do the same for your a neighbor's; a friend's.
    - throwaway173738 1y ago
      My nice wood furniture has had three owners and is almost 70 years old, so I certainly think it’s possible to own nice things and not be a wasteful consumerist.
      - RHSeeger 1y ago
        I built my living room coffee table by hand with my father, who is now dead. I built my shop table by hand (to match the one my father had). Even ignoring the 10s of thousand of dollars it would cost me to refurnish a house to match what I have now (and the staggering amount of time finding suitable replacements), there just a ton of things I could never replace.
    - SoftTalker 1y ago
      And yet when you die, the contents of your house (for inheritance purposes) will most likely be valued at under $10K and nobody will raise an eyebrow at that.
      - compiler-guy 1y ago
        When I die, my body will be worth a pittance. But I still value it far more than that now.
- B-Con 1y ago
  For me it isn't about the cost as much as it is that I've tailored my possessions to be what I like. If I have it, it brings value, and I probably like the details enough that it's hard to replace without getting an exact replica.
Der_Einzige 1y ago
[flagged]
- autoexec 1y ago
  It'd be a huge gamble. Many things can't be replaced. Mostly you'll be forced to get "similar" things. Different manufactures. Different model numbers. Enshittification means that you'll often be stuck with something much worse than what you had. With prices about to skyrocket and shelves about to be empty thanks to tariffs, mismanagement of the economy, and pissing off the people we depend on for nearly everything we have you'd have to be crazy to throw out everything you have and assume you'll save money buying new replacements for everything you lost.
- subscribed 1y ago
  They are NOT suggesting downsizing, entirely sensible practice. They say to sell everything except what can fit in one briefcase, and to buy all that stuff new in the new place. Super time consuming and expensive. I don't want someone's used bed or used sofa, so I'll have to buy new. Almost everything depreciates with time, so you're looking at a house of the good, usable stuff that can be sold or donated for a fraction of the price over the course of weeks (in the meanwhile you can wash your family clothes in the river and eat out), and then spend weeks buying brand new stuff (I'm not sure if either of you knows how much the household equipment costs). You're both likely talking from the perspective of the single małe loving in the small furnished flat and moving to another furnished flat. In that one edge case selling everything and buying new may work. (just don't move the goalposts: you're effectively discussing with the stance no one took, because no one was arguing downsizing)
  - Der_Einzige 1y ago
    [flagged]
    - iamacyborg 1y ago
      > My wife won’t agree though because women hate minimalism they are obsessed with trinkets, do-dads, and Knick-knacks. (see women’s reactions to young men living with only TV and couch meme on the internet) That’s not minimalism, it’s being a slob. Minimalism implies thought and precision, which is pretty much the opposite of the posts you’re referring to
barbazoo 1y ago
That sounds super wasteful.
pclmulqdq 1y ago
Yes, next time I move I will sell or donate my $100,000 piano and simply buy a new one in the new place.
- zeroonetwothree 1y ago
  Or just don’t have one? Most people don’t own $100,000 pianos and somehow they make do.
  - codedokode 1y ago
    I am sure most people wouldn't refuse to have a $100 000 piano if they had space for it.
  - glitchcrab 1y ago
    But they do have one, so your point is moot.
  - iamacyborg 1y ago
    What a weird take.
  - rwallace 1y ago
    Eh. I mean, I don't have a piano, but I think a world in which no one ever does anything that can't be done on a laptop computer, would not be a better place.
  - pclmulqdq 1y ago
    If you take the ratio of amount of time I play my piano to the TCO of my piano, I am expecting to spend something like $2-5 TCO / hour of entertainment (without considering resale value in ~30 years) over my life. That is a ratio that is better than most forms of entertainment. It rivals computer games, which are also pretty good on TCO / hour of enjoyment. That is even the case with a very high-end instrument. Perhaps more people should have things like pianos.
- Der_Einzige 1y ago
  A guy near me literally gave away a Steinway piano. Like, a real one worth at least 8K (verified it online). Me being too slow to get it is one of my great regrets in life.
TuringNYC 1y ago
>> Honestly the best way to move is to sell or donate everything and buy new for your new place. One problem is the delays on new furniture. I saw delays of 6-14 weeks on furniture when I last moved. I purchased a kitchen island from Ashley Furniture in 2021 which has still not fully arrived (the side-pieces are still pending in 2025) even though payments started as soon as the first item was shipped. Also, you may find that furniture prices in 2025 are not what they were when you last moved given inflation.
- ghaff 1y ago
  I had a kitchen fire recently with all the associated smoke damage mitigation. One of the "leave it where it is" commands I gave was a good sofa (that I bought second hand off my brother) which I really liked and (almost) perfectly fit in the space. One of those things where I was probably just over some threshold of various processes (and insurance coverages) kicking in though not really necessary for a lot of things. Pushed back on some and will see how successfully at the end of the day. One problem is that no one is incentivized to save you a lot of inconvenience and a year of living in a house that's not really set up yet.
idiotsecant 1y ago
Yes. It's a cliche but it's true. Your stuff owns you.
subscribed 1y ago
I ordered by new sofa in February. I expect it in May. It's just stuff you can or can't get. How would I know I can't get sofa? How much does assembling the furniture take? Do I book someone to help me with that or so I just pay for assembly? How much is the new mattress and why waste the old one, expensive and now destined to the skip? How much is going to cost me the living room equipment? Not much, two gaming consoles, TV, 7+2 setup with a decent, 8k, flexible AVR. Do I take the hit on buying the new motorcycle? Old, perfectly fine but a bit beaten bicycles will have to be thrown out as they look quite nasty (even though they ride well, in my currently 5th house), so it's a few grand on bicycles as well. Do I need to throw out my network equipment as well? I mean, I could probably sell it on ebay for a fraction of the value and buy new for 20 times what I'll get from my old one, then just get through the pain of setting new software anew... Etc, etc. I'm glad it works for you but it's laughable to offer your solution as a "best way to love" to everyone without knowing their circumstances.
neom 1y ago
I'm my 40s over here and in my life I've owned 3 full houses of...stuff, so much stuff, really nice stuff!!! Now I own almost nothing and life is much easier. I find the comments here really funny, now I am free I realize how trapped I was by my trappings, your uncle was a smart guy.
- foobarian 1y ago
  There gets to be a point where you have to assert you own the stuff, not the other way around. And cull ruthlessly. It's hardest with a partner or if you grew up frugal and get hung up on "giving it away to good hands."
kristjansson 1y ago
At some life stages and situations, this makes total sense. I’d think those are predominantly when one is embarking on a new stage, and moving as a part of that. Graduations, retirement, marriage, divorce, … . But someone moving involuntarily (job change, new posting, …), perhaps with a partner, perhaps with children … it’s hard to begrudge that person bringing many of their things along to ease the transition. There’s a reason the US military pays for movers.
southernplaces7 1y ago
>Honestly the best way to move is to sell or donate everything and buy new for your new place. Get down to suitcases or stuff you can pack and ship via UPS The best way? Really? Perhaps if you're comfortable enough financially in a way that most people in the U.S, or even more so, the rest of the world are not. I mean, how wonderful if you have the discretionary budget to simply sell at a typical major discount or donate away most of your major physical possessions and just buy everything new. For many, many, if not most people, attempting such a thing would be a huge economic blow in addition to the already often heavy costs of moving. If some of the advice and observations often given on this site seem like naval-gazing, bubble-dwelling nonsense, it's due to laughable comments like this one.
nunez 1y ago
This works when you have cheap and/or limited furniture. Better/more expensive furniture is difficult to sell but also valuable enough to keep.
- ghaff 1y ago
  Selling stuff, especially if you're well outside of a major city, is sort of tough. Yard sales don't really bring in the cash and take some work. Most people probably don't want the stuff you don't want and even selling that takes effort.
  - nunez 1y ago
    Right. You lose money _and_ time; the worst combination.
    - ghaff 1y ago
      My example is that I have a pile of laserdiscs that some retro collector probably wants but I'm not going to individually list them on ebay for $3 each. Maybe I'll put the whole package on Facebook for a few hundred and see if someone bites but that's about as far as I'll go. I do live at the end of a long driveway on a busy road and I've found that a good way to dump old lawn equipment and furniture for free.
Glyptodon 1y ago
If someone gave me replacement value for my stuff I would not have an issue with this. But realistically nobody is going to give $50k+ to replace all your furniture, electronics, dishes, tools, and so forth. And it only really adds up if you either (a) are wealthy enough that it's not a meaningful cost, or (b) barely have anything in the way of furniture and tools. It's also complicated by things like decently made shelves that aren't wildly expensive being much harder to find than 20 years ago. Like if I could get equivalent shelves adjusted for inflation donating and replacing them would be fine. But I literally can't - I can only find cheap crap or rather expensive stuff that's moderately nicer than my old stuff.

nunez 1y ago

Agreed. My wife and I did a move ourselves once. Never again. Movers ever time.