4 ms·

> I have never met a romantic partner anywhere but through an app I mean, okay, I get it, but people have been finding mates for hundreds of thousands of years

by dvt 1y ago

> I have never met a romantic partner anywhere but through an app I mean, okay, I get it, but people have been finding mates for hundreds of thousands of years before apps. People really need to exercise that muscle. Apps are a crutch (and imo a bad one, at that).

paulcole 1y ago
Read the comment I was replying to closely: > If you want to make friends and meet a partner you need to join groups "Need" is obviously not true. I generally agree that it is mostly true for friends but I strongly disagree that it is mostly true for romantic partners. > people have been finding mates for hundreds of thousands of years before apps People have been doing tons of things before apps. Eating, moving themselves from point a to point b, buying things, etc. I'm not sure your point here. > Apps are a crutch (and imo a bad one, at that). Why specifically is this crutch bad? You would never say that accountants were keeping books for hundreds of years before spreadsheets and that spreadsheets (or Quickbooks or Xero or whatever) are a crutch (and a bad one at that).
- dvt 1y ago
  > Why specifically is this crutch bad? The data speaks for itself: people are reporting being lonelier than ever, sexlessness is up for both men and women, birth rates are down. These apps are predatory, etc., etc. I wrote a blog post about it a few years ago[1]. Approaching women in the wild is more fun, more natural, and more in line with our biological imperatives. Comparing dating apps with Excel is, imo, a category error. [1] https://dvt.name/2020/02/24/rfc-lets-disrupt-dating-apps/ https://dvt.name/2020/02/24/rfc-lets-disrupt-dating-apps/
  - nradov 1y ago
    We should be careful not to make claims that any particular behavior is "more natural". Citation needed. Many cultures place very tight constraints on men approaching women, sometimes to the extent of criminal penalties. I'm not saying this is a good thing — people should be able to live their own lives — but I'm just pointing out that we really have no idea what natural human behavior without cultural influences would even look like.
  - shermantanktop 1y ago
    Your post won't load for me, but I find the date of the post intriguing...right on the eve of lockdown. A lot changed for a lot of people then, including young people who suddenly had no option to approach others "in the wild."
scarface_74 1y ago
For most of that hundreds of thousands of years, mates were arranged and/or the men forced women to mate them. “Love marriages” weren’t a thing and still aren’t the norm in many cultures

by dvt 1y ago

paulcole 1y ago

Read the comment I was replying to closely: > If you want to make friends and meet a partner you need to join groups "Need" is obviously not true. I generally agree that it is mostly true for friends but I strongly disagree that it is mostly true for romantic partners. > people have been finding mates for hundreds of thousands of years before apps People have been doing tons of things before apps. Eating, moving themselves from point a to point b, buying things, etc. I'm not sure your point here. > Apps are a crutch (and imo a bad one, at that). Why specifically is this crutch bad? You would never say that accountants were keeping books for hundreds of years before spreadsheets and that spreadsheets (or Quickbooks or Xero or whatever) are a crutch (and a bad one at that).

dvt 1y ago
> Why specifically is this crutch bad? The data speaks for itself: people are reporting being lonelier than ever, sexlessness is up for both men and women, birth rates are down. These apps are predatory, etc., etc. I wrote a blog post about it a few years ago[1]. Approaching women in the wild is more fun, more natural, and more in line with our biological imperatives. Comparing dating apps with Excel is, imo, a category error. [1] https://dvt.name/2020/02/24/rfc-lets-disrupt-dating-apps/ https://dvt.name/2020/02/24/rfc-lets-disrupt-dating-apps/
- nradov 1y ago
  We should be careful not to make claims that any particular behavior is "more natural". Citation needed. Many cultures place very tight constraints on men approaching women, sometimes to the extent of criminal penalties. I'm not saying this is a good thing — people should be able to live their own lives — but I'm just pointing out that we really have no idea what natural human behavior without cultural influences would even look like.
- shermantanktop 1y ago
  Your post won't load for me, but I find the date of the post intriguing...right on the eve of lockdown. A lot changed for a lot of people then, including young people who suddenly had no option to approach others "in the wild."

scarface_74 1y ago

For most of that hundreds of thousands of years, mates were arranged and/or the men forced women to mate them. “Love marriages” weren’t a thing and still aren’t the norm in many cultures