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> No path out of this valley involves traveling alone In my opinion, this is the big take here When you have enough money to not work, it becomes very lonely
by nico 2y ago
> No path out of this valley involves traveling alone
In my opinion, this is the big take here
When you have enough money to not work, it becomes very lonely fast
All of a sudden you have tons of time, but no one to share it with. Everyone is busy, mostly with work (also, most people probably can’t afford the same things you can)
If you could coordinate to stop working at the same time as your significant other, and a few friends, then you at least would have a group to plan and do stuff with
One of the biggest meanings we can find in life, is the feeling of belonging
OP seems to be going through a belonging crisis. Trying to figure out what group he wants to belong to
- varelse 2y ago[flagged]
- sentientslug 2y agoWeird that you brought race into it, especially when your supposition is incorrect.
- varelse 2y ago[dead]
- freejazz 2y ago[flagged]
- varelse 2y ago[dead]
- NicholasGurr 2y ago[flagged]
- LordAtlas 2y ago> OP sounds like a rich white dude having rich white dude problems. Yeah, definitely white: https://www.google.com/search?q=vinay+hiremath&btnG=Search&udm=2 https://www.google.com/search?q=vinay+hiremath&btnG=Search&u...
- varelse 2y ago[dead]
- pfannkuchen 2y agoThis reminds me of that Supreme Court case from 1923 where the entire case was about deciding “are Indians white”. Crazy how that was not that long ago in historical terms.
- econ 2y agoDid they sentence him to being white?
- lazide 2y agoI looked it up, thinking he was Native American. But he was Sikh (Indian Indian), and arguing his proto-Indo-European ancestry qualified him. He was ‘acquitted’ of being ‘white’, and case thrown out. Really interesting case, actually. Some pretty nasty stuff in there from the plaintiff about his revulsion too and not wanting to marry the ‘lower castes’ (and some argument regarding Mongoloids) to help quantify him as ‘white’ in case you get too sympathetic. [https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_v._Bhagat_Singh_Thind https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_v._Bhagat_Sing...]
- varelse 2y ago[dead]
- nico 2y agoIt seems like you grew into your loneliness and that you also did it consciously OP found himself alone rather fast and without truly realizing it was happening He’ll probably get over it at some point, will find a group to belong to and redefine his identity along the way Neither situation is intrinsically better or worse, just different and subjective to each one of you
- varelse 2y ago[dead]
- deleted 2y ago[deleted]
- gopalv 2y ago> When you have enough money to not work, it becomes very lonely fast I haven't made enough to not work but once my US immigration was sorted out (H1B isn't very leisure compatible), I took a year off to rediscover what all passed me by when I was working. This was a lot of alone time, but not true loneliness. For example, I would set up lunch with a friend, they would bail due to work emergencies or something but I would go eat there anyway. Quickly learned to go to a place where multiple people were scheduled anyway, like heading to Berkley for a tech talk on Byzantine block chains or vector search algorithms, hoping something would interest me. > OP seems to be going through a belonging crisis. Trying to figure out what group he wants to belong to The first three months were a strange struggle with my Ego, because a large part of my "Get up and do things" was the belief that what I had to do was very important to others and the whole world stops if I stop moving. To get through the waves in life without feeling self pity about it, I honestly felt my work was what made the sun rise and the rain fall. Suddenly, my self importance was shot to pieces immediately. I wasn't important anymore, what I did wasn't important to others but only to me. All the years of sacrificing my own wants (not needs) suddenly felt dissonant. Plus a lot of activities aren't cumulative in the way work is - cooking dinner today does nothing for dinner tomorrow, there's no way to add up that to something. Work is particularly rewarding because it checks those two boxes for me - it adds up to something, slowly every day, plus what I do is important to others in way where they want you to succeed (unlike say training for the SF marathon, where it's all "I could never" from people who could, but don't want to). Eventually, I went back to work, but now I drink that workahol in moderation.
- richiricho 2y ago[dead]
- ozim 2y agoI read somewhere there are old money people in Europe faking that they are “working class” - not really to hide the fact that they are rich - to have people to hang out with in general.
- cableshaft 2y agoIf I ever got to the point of having fuck you money, I don't see myself stop hanging out with my friends. We all like movies and dinner and board games. That's all I need in order to hang out. My board game group as it is has a pretty broad spectrum of financial situations.
- 1024core 2y agoI hate to say this, but you'd be surprised how relationships change when one party in the relationship gets FU money. It is not pretty.
- mnhnhm 2y agopeople say money can change a person, but it actually is that a person no longer needs to fake being nice once they're free from monetary issues.
- ranger_danger 2y ago> Everyone is busy, mostly with work (also, most people probably can’t afford the same things you can) I would think if one were rich, and you knew who you wanted to spend time with, you could simply buy their time through various means. Pay some bills, get them a more relaxed job with more time, pay for vacations for them to go with you etc.
- benjam47 2y agoYou would think so, but I have not found a single person who wants to take me up on that.