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You're thinking of a certain type of bullshitter that everyone likes to hate. I will circle back to that. The basics of emotional control are things like not i

You're thinking of a certain type of bullshitter that everyone likes to hate. I will circle back to that. The basics of emotional control are things like not immediately interjecting when you disagree with someone in a conversation. But also, having some limits to procrastination, eg when you are studying. Or a bit of resilience when life treats you harshly. Social navigation is understanding other people. Why is this person who arrived at the party alone looking down at the floor? What is a compliment that this person will appreciate? What do people here think, and where does it differ from what I think? A friend of mine is insanely good at the social part, it's almost like magic. He saw a guy looking at him in a bar, goes over, says "hey man, you're a secret service agent, right?". He wasn't wrong, and he's friends with the guy now. Now, back to persuasion. People who are actually good socially don't get caught bullshitting. The best people will acknowledge their faults. "I was thinking we could all do {this project}, but I'm not the techie here and you guys might have some input". People appreciate that over "trust me, we can totally do this guys, one team one dream". It's actually the people who aren't good socially who seem to make progress initially, because at least they aren't anonymous, but they can't actually build the support they need and people start resenting their style.

wruza 2y ago
Thanks for explanation, I understand your idea better now, but still disagree. I don’t think that the described is actually commonly lacking and, back to the original point, that it is first and foremost related to some form of success. There are lots of social people, at least they are the majority at meetings. And barely a quarter of them are that high on that beaten success/thrive ladder. (And it may be just post-factum confidence in disguise). While social is important, as in “don’t be socially disabled”, I find this importance barely meaningful for what was an initial point of subj, cause it’s in no common lack-of category. I guess that’s where we see it differently.

wruza 2y ago

Thanks for explanation, I understand your idea better now, but still disagree. I don’t think that the described is actually commonly lacking and, back to the original point, that it is first and foremost related to some form of success. There are lots of social people, at least they are the majority at meetings. And barely a quarter of them are that high on that beaten success/thrive ladder. (And it may be just post-factum confidence in disguise). While social is important, as in “don’t be socially disabled”, I find this importance barely meaningful for what was an initial point of subj, cause it’s in no common lack-of category. I guess that’s where we see it differently.