4 ms·
Is this any surprise? High levels of income inequality combined with DINK needed for a house. Everyone is looking for a quick flip.
by bix6 3y ago
Is this any surprise? High levels of income inequality combined with DINK needed for a house. Everyone is looking for a quick flip.
- nytesky 3y agoNot only that, but women are going to college in greater numbers, many are out earning men. Dating can be challenging under those conditions.
- high_na_euv 3y agoHow many women out-earn men?
- walthamstow 3y agoAnecdata: 3 men on my 7-man Engineering team are outearned by their wives. London millennials for reference.
- zeroonetwothree 3y agoSeems to be around 26% outearn their partners
- caddemon 3y agoSome of that is just social conditioning though, or maybe an innate instinct but an irrational one in today's day and age. There's no reason a woman can't be the primary breadwinner, and most high earning women I know are very open to dating someone with a much lower salary as long as they are a good partner. But more often than not the guy has a hang up about the situation or is otherwise unwilling to contribute enough around the house. So instead you end up with dual high income paying for cleaning service, daycare, etc.
- giraffe_lady 3y agoYeah when I read all these comments about how hard dating is for men now, how impossible it is and think about the professional women I know and their dating experiences.... They have very reasonable standards in how they expect men to treat them, and the men they date are overwhelmingly not willing to rise to those standards. These standards are maybe much higher than they would have been even a generation ago but for the most part they are still very reasonable! And I am not even talking about money here.
- llm_trw 3y agoThis seems backwards. If your friends can't find men that meet their standards by definition their standards aren't reasonable since they aren't being met. Were they reasonable they would be met. Let's not pretend that social media hasn't had a much worse impact on women than on men.
- giraffe_lady 3y agoThis is implicitly assuming men's expectations are valid and correct, but not women's. The standards I'm talking about here are things like "will not mock or belittle me" and "will consider me an equal participant in the relationship and value my desires accordingly." They haven't misunderstood the situation or made a mistake. Their BATNA is to not have a spouse and they are taking it. Where a generation or two they might have settled for someone who treated them dismissively, but not abusively.
- llm_trw 3y ago>The standards I'm talking about here are things like "will not mock or belittle me" and "will consider me an equal participant in the relationship and value my desires accordingly." What you're describing there is a woman's expectation of a man. A man's expectations of a woman have nothing to do with the above. >Their BATNA is to not have a spouse and they are taking it. Interesting claim, let's revisit it when they are in their 50s.
- 3y ago
- anthonypasq 3y agothe average woman simply does not respect men who make less money than them. you can come back with all sorts of anecdotes and every women claiming that isnt the case, but the data on this is very clear. its my opinion that you simply cannot trust people's words when it comes to hypothetical partners. Peoples stated preferences and actual actions are completely divergent.
- longtimelistnr 3y agoI'm not saying data doesn't exist, but this kind of thing makes me laugh i suppose because its just dating. All my friends have no trouble getting girlfriends and as we are recent college graduate age, most do not have salaried jobs and if they do are not the highest paying jobs. In this 22-25 age range though I do notice most of these women are self sufficient usually employed in the service industry or entry level degree related position. But overall dating is not something i care to even acknolwedge statistics about. Never going to find a partner if you're not living a fulfilling life and have unrealistic standards.
- regentbowerbird 3y agoCould you point us to the very clear data you mention about women having no respect for men earning less than themselves?
- bequanna 3y agoThis is well established: Generally, women will pursue men with higher socioeconomic status, men do not make a distinction and optimize for sexual attraction.
- regentbowerbird 3y agoIt's interesting but what's the source beyond saying "this is well established"?
- anthonypasq 3y agomarriages where the woman is the higher earner have substantially higher divorce rates
- ImHereToVote 3y agoAre there any numbers supporting this analysis?
- martinky24 3y agoYou are implying more men are left single, unable to afford a house, because they can't find a partner, because the pool of available women isn't available in them? Hmm...
- meowfly 3y agoIf you're a young man in your prime without rich parents and you slacked or lack the ability to compete in the job market, unless you are very charismatic, you won't make a particularly interesting partner. 20 years ago your dating pool was far more limited to location and social circles you were in. Online dating has decimated that. The illusion that you are a big win away from achieving a fast track to status is the allure.
- BitwiseFool 3y agoNot just a quick flip, the old-school days of working hard and being a loyal employee are long over. When the more steady routes of gaining wealth are increasingly out of reach, gambling becomes more enticing.
- gherkinnn 3y agoWhy be a loyal employee if you get fucked the first chance the org gets? I know plenty of old-school companies that treat their people remarkably well and loyalty goes both ways. But I struggle to think of a new-schools tech company that won't exploit an employee's naivety.
- hiatus 3y agoWhen I was younger and worked as a cashier at a grocer, I had a pension given to me by the employer. As a cashier! Now, that same job at the same exact store does not offer a pension. The employer/employee relationship has changed dramatically over the past 20 years (or more).
- fullshark 3y agoIt's a surprise to our leadership class who has absolutely zero idea what it's like to be a middle class high school / college graduate without premium skills and almost no savings in the 2024 global economy.