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How can Santa keep his lists when the GDPR is around?
- tempodox 3y agoGDPR should reduce Santa's workload because presents are opt-in now.
- whartung 3y agoTell you what, I’m opting in to Santa.
- johndunne 3y agoShould I be envious of any parent who had to actually address this one with a Santa believing kid advanced enough to ponder this one!
- zbowling 3y agoSanta has a cookie notice now that you must accept when he collects the cookies you leave for him.
- johndhi 3y agoAre the cookies you leave out for Santa "strictly necessary"? They might be a species of marketing: you're trying to convince him to give you more gifts.
- jahewson 3y agoAlso make sure to bake them yourself instead of using third party cookies.
- egberts1 3y agoGluten-free.
- krapp 3y agoI would assume that tradition derives from similar offerings being made to faeries or hearth deities in return for their favor, in which case you're not trying to convince Santa to give you more gifts but rather to not to steal your children and replace them with changelings or lumps of coal because you offended his weird elf sense of hospitality.
- 082349872349872 3y agoMore worryingly: if Santa knows who's been naughty and who's been nice, he would necessarily have been aware that the other reindeer had been mobbing Rudolph, but did nothing about it until circumstances made Rudolph's talents useful to the North Pole.
- nyokodo 3y agoThe good kids get to enjoy the worsened global warming, lower air quality, and radioactive fallout from all the coal Santa distributes to the bad kids.
- pc86 3y agoThis presumes that "who" refers to all living animals (organisms?) and not just human beings.
- throwup238 3y agoI believe Krampus is responsible for non-human animals.
- 082349872349872 3y agoGiven that Der Krampus arrives Dec. 6, he's probably just playing bad cop to St. Nick's good cop. According to traditional theology, animals don't have souls, so they don't have much to do with religion, and believers had better be satisfied spending an eternity strumming their harps with neither Fido nor Kat Vonnegut Jr. for company. (does Dante mention any animals in the 1st circle? Non-philospher non-featherless non-biped animals, that is...)
- tetris11 3y agoAnimals have stood trial for their actions since the time of the Greeks, and have undergone shifts of being intentional criminals, to automatons of Nature who can't be judged, to self-aware beings with rich inner lives who should stand trial for their actions, but Animal Trials were out of vogue by then.
- tibbydudeza 3y agoSanta has an exemption for all children until the age of 12.
- mewpmewp2 3y agoI'm asking my children every time, whether they consent to giving the Santa their list of actions. If they don't consent, they won't be receiving any gifts at all. It's that simple.
- eastbound 3y agoDo you consent to give your insurance the list of your actions? If you don’t, you won’t be receiving any damage indemnity at all. I suppose that was the metaphor ?
- mewpmewp2 3y agoMy main metaphor I guess is that I like to be annoying to my children, but I don't really have children yet, so I'm just looking forwards to annoying my children. It's just the most exciting part of potentially having children - having unlimited power and time to be able to troll them. And seeing how these great neural networks try to adapt to it. I will do my best to keep them guessing for sure.
- Yiin 3y agoI really hope you change your outlook on children development by the time you get to having them, unless you're talking about kids older than 7 y.o. If you really want to, you can make kids think whatever you want, that's why religious brainwashing is so effective.
- mewpmewp2 3y agoCould you please elaborate on what exactly you hope I change my outlook on.
- kroolik 3y agoTrolling, as it may make children not trust your words if what you say is consistently a lie/joke. The children may be also laughed at by their colleagues if they repeat your words at kindergarden/early school.
- m0llusk 3y agoDo you have any idea how much his lists of bad girls are worth? The man is a creep.
- gcnnbdff 3y ago[dead]
- arccy 3y agothat's why we give santa cookies (and milk)
- tacone 3y agoto track him? :)
- woodylondon 3y agoYou are giving the EU ideas!!!!!
- szszrk 3y agoHonestly EU doesn't have to change a single thing. All compliance exists already. The trick is to not track good children at all, only those bad ones. I'd you leverage sanction lists (that exist already) to track the bad children, you have all cases covered. Any Santa related contractor (Santa helpers, elves, etc) have to check a sanction list to see if they can finalize a transaction with said child. As for lists: when a child sends a request for particular gift, it starts a formal transaction. The other entity is legally allowed to process said child's data to provide the service they agreed upon. Kids that have not sent a letter to Santa and are not mentioned in sanction lists, can still get gifts but Santa lacks profiling metadata and can only provide generic, unprofiled gifts. Which is good as already have sufficient amount of Bluetooth speakers and Paw Patrol toys.
- mardifoufs 3y agoWait, how would tracking bad kids be less illegal? I think putting bad children on state sanctions list might very well be deserved for some of them, but a bit overkill... Imagine not doing your homework leading to being officially sanctioned by EU governments or the UN... though I'm sure that's a pretty convincing way to make someone do their homework.
- szszrk 3y agoI would not optimise for performance yo early. All the building blocks are here. Let's leave "scaling issues" to the Christmas OPS team! Some cloud provider must have a North Pole region, right?
- jrflowers 3y agoSanta Claus lives off the grid and flies his unregistered aircraft across borders with no use for a passport. Santa Claus is a free man on the land sovereign citizen
- kramerger 3y agoNah, have you ever met a "sovereign citizen" that gives anything back to the society?
- antisthenes 3y agoThey certainly give back some entertainment value to society.
- jrflowers 3y agoHe runs a massive unregulated surveillance apparatus with no opt out and forces adults to accept it by buying the good will of children with goods made by his stable of captive unpaid workers
- RALaBarge 3y agoDamn, the OP is right…
- chrismcb 3y agoYes. Apparently you haven't. Have you actually met a "sovereign citizen?"
- PhasmaFelis 3y agoAre we still talking about the guys who think they that laws don't apply to them if they claim to be "traveling in a conveyance" rather than driving a car? Or is there some other meaning?
- cperciva 3y agoSanta Claus was issued a Canadian Passport in 2013: https://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/politics/canada-issues-santa-claus-a-passport/article16072973/ https://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/politics/canada-issues-... That said, it expired a few days ago; I don't know if it was ever renewed.
- weinzierl 3y agoHe does not need consent because of Article 6 (e), which says that "to perform a task in the public interest or in official authority" is a lawful purpose. Also people always forget that the scope of the GDPR is limited. The following three areas are generally exempt: - Personal or household activities - Law enforcement - National Security
- mardifoufs 3y agoI guess it becomes household activities the moment he gets into the chimney. Big tech should try to exploit this loophole too, somehow. Maybe make Alexa part of your household?
- postsantum 3y agoAnother unelected official in Europe
- InCityDreams 3y agoDid you think of the children?
- rectang 3y agoAll I want for Christmas is freedom from being endlessly spammed by anti-GDPR zealots co-opting Santa Claus.
- dehrmann 3y agoThe EU could pass a law giving an exemption to north pole-based charities.
- jerkstate 3y agoMy 3 year old asked me how Santa knows when you are sleeping and I told him “metadata” - he asked how he knows if you’ve been bad or good, and I told him, intelligence sharing agreements between five eyes nations. I hope he has a sense of humor about this when he gets older (but he probably won’t remember it)
- stephenr 3y agoJust as likely he'll start asking you to check under his bed for the monsters "mega dada" and "the one with five eyes"!
- gerdesj 3y agoYes, do be careful with cunning quips to young 'uns! There are lots of legitimate "lies to children" as Terry Pratchet used to say but they can come back to bite you later. One of those euphemisms for a while, in the UK, was "gone to Devon". I think it arose naturally from gone to heaven being miss-heard. Devon is a popular holiday destination, so going to Devon is a reasonably often heard phrase. Even young enough Devonian (1) children could probably manage to accept that as an explanation! I can remember being aged around six in an infant school in West Germany. I'm a British Army brat, this was around 1976. We were sat in a circle around the teacher and assistant towards the end of the day and they were asking questions like what were we going to do for the holidays. Several kids responded that they were going to the UK. I had no idea what they were on about. It wasn't important enough to me at the time to ask and I obviously found out later. Even later on, I discovered just how complicated "the UK" really is as a group of entities! (1) I have ancestry going back sixteen generations in Devon and Cornwall, a thicket in Northants, and a direct male line that vanishes into Hanover. Oh and possibly a C18 serial killer from near Devizes.
- InCityDreams 3y agoIserlohn, Soest, Bruggen?
- 3y ago
- timbit42 3y agoObviously, Santa is a timelord who has assumed the identity of Saint Nicholas of Myra. This explains why he can live forever, why he appears differently to different children using psychic paper (skin color, clothing, shape, different names, etc), can enter homes without chimneys (Tardis disguised as a sleigh) and why his sack is bigger on the inside than the outside. The Doctor isn't the only timelord who has an affinity for earthlings.
- andylynch 3y agoAt least one time lord claims the name. Although that one probably should not be believed. Santa does definitely know how to get sonic screwdrivers though.
- amelius 3y agoSanta never gets any presents, so he doesn't care being on the naughty list.
- throwaway892238 3y agoSanta literally performs breaking and entering in every home and nation in the world. He's an international criminal. I don't think he's losing sleep over GDPR.
- charcircuit 3y agoConsider he also commits breaking and entering and theft he does not care about the GDPR.
- jdougan 3y agoNah. Making a request of Santa is, by custom, explicily authorizing him to enter make the delivery. Putting out the cookies and milk for Santa, is extra confirmation.
- tzs 3y agoGDPR could also make it hard on the Sandman and the Tooth Fairy. The Easter Bunny at least is probably unaffected.
- chrismcb 3y agoBecause he isn't in Europe.
- mckn1ght 3y agoThis seems like it could fit somewhere in Santa Claus: an Engineer’s Perspective: https://users.ece.cmu.edu/~andrew5/cute/engineer_santa.txt https://users.ece.cmu.edu/~andrew5/cute/engineer_santa.txt
- creer 3y agoAbove the law?
- worthless-trash 3y agoNobody is above "the law", just ask Dredd : https://www.facebook.com/889298117788282/photos/a.889336437784450/5246219845429399/ https://www.facebook.com/889298117788282/photos/a.8893364377...
- creer 3y agoI mean, NORAD keeps an eye on him, just in case he gets rooted by North Korea and heads for the White House or the Carriers. But they don't have jurisdiction to enforce GDPR.
- 1vuio0pswjnm7 3y ago(2018)