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My experience is the exact opposite - people in tech have either 0 or 1 kid(and swear they won't have any more - after all, how can you fit any more in your lif
by gambiting 3y ago
My experience is the exact opposite - people in tech have either 0 or 1 kid(and swear they won't have any more - after all, how can you fit any more in your life). People outside of tech(teachers, academics, accountants, musicians) all have 2-3 kids.
>>Why, what does having a 5th child change for you? Are you bored?
I mean, I only have 1 personally, but I get it - kids are fun. And the process of being a parent is fun(outside of the parts that absolutely suck) and extremely rewarding, it's been more rewarding than everything I have ever done in my professional career, and I have some things under my belt that I'm very proud of - seeing my son develop is still more rewarding than any of these. I assume that with every new child you just get to repeat the process and get that reward again and again and again. So I suppose the answer is ultimately - for somewhat selfish reasons. Kids are not just mine workers or care for the elderly.
- swozey 3y agoThat's interesting considering one big obvious reason my coworkers/friends have 3+ kids is because they easily clear $300k+ single income and can live in 6 bedroom homes, etc. Drive those massive suburbans.. I have a very difficult time believing that the 3rd, 4th, etc children have a dad like you who still has the time to have fun with them and treat them properly and love their achievements each, etc. But it's possible. My mom has 6 siblings and they were raised like wolves, but they're boomers. I have one (older) sibling and we absolutely vied for our parents attention and do not get along whatsoever.
- gambiting 3y agoI think there's probably a few things at play here. Here in UK tech workers don't earn anywhere near what their US counterparts do. A senior programmer might be paid 50-100k depending on the company, but it's very rare to cross that level(and once you do, you start losing state benefits related to child care and paying higher and higher levels of tax). "Tech workers" definitely don't have 6-bed houses and drive massive SUVs here, at best they enjoy relaxed "upper middle class" lifestyle - newish 4 bed house on a modern estate, 2 leased cars, swimming in mortgage payments and other debt. They aren't struggling but they aren't so comfortable to have 6 kids and pay for all of their childcare costs - because everyone knows that doing so would just erase those great salaries and would most likely mean a step down in the quality of life. They will earn more than teachers, but like 2-3x as much, not 10x as much. Then most tech workers I know have had to move for their jobs - so they don't have immediate support of family, grandparents etc - so having more kids means more daily responsibilities and more daily costs for childcare. In contrast the other people I mentioned all live close to their families - so having 3 kids is not a big deal because half the time grandma is over and helps out. Like, for us we pay more in childcare(just for one child!) than what our mortgage is per month, partially because we don't have any family around us to help. These are my observations anyway, anecdotes - take them as just that.
- yoyohello13 3y agoI have no kids, and due to my medical circumstances will probably never have them. As I get older there seems to be more and more Death around. Grandparents, Aunts and Uncles are getting older and Dying. Having more people expanding the family, becoming alive and growing is just better for the psyche. So I can see the appeal of having a lot of kids.