4 ms·

I’m inthe PNW and feel this is largely situation dependent. Was camping in Oregon last weekend and was surprised by how many different groups of campers were co

I’m inthe PNW and feel this is largely situation dependent. Was camping in Oregon last weekend and was surprised by how many different groups of campers were conversing at length with one another. When on/around my boat at the marina it’s common for folks to chat openly. In my neighborhood it’s very much the opposite and there’s little/no eye contact and chatter.

ptmcc 3y ago
Socialization in the PNW is highly hobby/activity oriented. It's immediate common ground and usually a recreational context. Day to day is more much reserved and insular as we go about our business.
- hackermatic 3y ago
  That's what I've noticed, too -- even casual trail walkers are much more likely to greet you and smile.
- LordShredda 3y ago
  Is that why most advice you see online is to go rock climbing or hiking to meet friends?
  - dieselgate 3y ago
    I wouldn't say it's PNW specific where that's true but in my experience those types of things are great ways to meet people and build social relationships. It could also be through any other sort of recurring activity like friday night magic or a local code meetup etc. Edit: the downside of this, in my experience as well, is getting pigeon-holed in some activity with others. Especially when something like alcohol is involved
- wrp 3y ago
  Growing up in Oregon, it's just the way it was that we socialized with people we met through work/church/school/hobby, but not neighbors. I've lived next door to people for decades and not even met them face-to-face. Many years ago, I was riding on a nearly empty city bus. A guy got on and sat not too far away. After a bit, he looked my way and sidled over to be in conversation distance and said, "Excuse, I moved here from Florida about two months ago. Nobody here will talk to me, and I'm starting to go crazy. Is there something wrong with me?"
Klonoar 3y ago
The replies to this comment illustrated it well, but yes, I would agree in general. It just gets tiring when you have to go do something to have a simple conversation. i.e, random convos in bars here are not a thing - or at least not comparable to e.g the east coast of America.
- doubleg72 3y ago
  Don’t people go to bars to socialize??
  - sweettea 3y ago
    I have never experienced talking to a stranger at a bar - one goes with ones friends, and gets to know them better, but nobody known to nobody ever gets added to the conversation.
    - kasey_junk 3y ago
      What? That sounds really strange. Nearly every time I’m at a bar I end up in a conversation with someone new.
  - Klonoar 3y ago
    I've been in bars all over the world, ranging from Tokyo to NYC to SF to now Seattle - with plenty of other cities in between. If you'll pardon my french here: the PNW is the most clique-filled bar experience I have experienced worldwide and it's really very boring to deal with. You can make it work, but it winds up being more work than is ideal.
gwright 3y ago
I've found that campers/hikers anywhere are generally very approachable.
- dieselgate 3y ago
  For sure, one of the best parts to me about being in a National park for example is how happy and stoked on life everyone is
- PaulDavisThe1st 3y ago
  Because every one knows they'll never have to see each other again.
  - dieselgate 3y ago
    Funny this is mentioned and maybe there's some truth to it. One thing that struck me about the culture from an extended trip to Mexico City a few years ago is how often people say "hasta luego"/"see you later" for transactions - even if they're total strangers. I found it very warming and a contrast to where I'm from. It makes sense as a farewell but think people take it more literally - to the point where people have responded "uh not really" to my own "see you later". One of the funniest lines of Dumb and Dumber to me is "well big gulps eh, see you later!" [1] [1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_j5tDuakKU https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_j5tDuakKU
  - morserer 3y ago
    It might be a factor, but I don't think that's the main reason. If you're an outdoorsy type, you have that immediate common ground with fellow campers, and have a whole host of starter questions pertaining to that interest that will usually kickstart an entire conversation. Same with the marina-goers: boats are an interest that you can start a convo with. Makes it easy.

ptmcc 3y ago

Socialization in the PNW is highly hobby/activity oriented. It's immediate common ground and usually a recreational context. Day to day is more much reserved and insular as we go about our business.

hackermatic 3y ago
That's what I've noticed, too -- even casual trail walkers are much more likely to greet you and smile.
LordShredda 3y ago
Is that why most advice you see online is to go rock climbing or hiking to meet friends?
- dieselgate 3y ago
  I wouldn't say it's PNW specific where that's true but in my experience those types of things are great ways to meet people and build social relationships. It could also be through any other sort of recurring activity like friday night magic or a local code meetup etc. Edit: the downside of this, in my experience as well, is getting pigeon-holed in some activity with others. Especially when something like alcohol is involved
wrp 3y ago
Growing up in Oregon, it's just the way it was that we socialized with people we met through work/church/school/hobby, but not neighbors. I've lived next door to people for decades and not even met them face-to-face. Many years ago, I was riding on a nearly empty city bus. A guy got on and sat not too far away. After a bit, he looked my way and sidled over to be in conversation distance and said, "Excuse, I moved here from Florida about two months ago. Nobody here will talk to me, and I'm starting to go crazy. Is there something wrong with me?"

Klonoar 3y ago

The replies to this comment illustrated it well, but yes, I would agree in general. It just gets tiring when you have to go do something to have a simple conversation. i.e, random convos in bars here are not a thing - or at least not comparable to e.g the east coast of America.

doubleg72 3y ago
Don’t people go to bars to socialize??
- sweettea 3y ago
  I have never experienced talking to a stranger at a bar - one goes with ones friends, and gets to know them better, but nobody known to nobody ever gets added to the conversation.
  - kasey_junk 3y ago
    What? That sounds really strange. Nearly every time I’m at a bar I end up in a conversation with someone new.
- Klonoar 3y ago
  I've been in bars all over the world, ranging from Tokyo to NYC to SF to now Seattle - with plenty of other cities in between. If you'll pardon my french here: the PNW is the most clique-filled bar experience I have experienced worldwide and it's really very boring to deal with. You can make it work, but it winds up being more work than is ideal.

gwright 3y ago

I've found that campers/hikers anywhere are generally very approachable.

dieselgate 3y ago
For sure, one of the best parts to me about being in a National park for example is how happy and stoked on life everyone is
PaulDavisThe1st 3y ago
Because every one knows they'll never have to see each other again.
- dieselgate 3y ago
  Funny this is mentioned and maybe there's some truth to it. One thing that struck me about the culture from an extended trip to Mexico City a few years ago is how often people say "hasta luego"/"see you later" for transactions - even if they're total strangers. I found it very warming and a contrast to where I'm from. It makes sense as a farewell but think people take it more literally - to the point where people have responded "uh not really" to my own "see you later". One of the funniest lines of Dumb and Dumber to me is "well big gulps eh, see you later!" [1] [1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_j5tDuakKU https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_j5tDuakKU
- morserer 3y ago
  It might be a factor, but I don't think that's the main reason. If you're an outdoorsy type, you have that immediate common ground with fellow campers, and have a whole host of starter questions pertaining to that interest that will usually kickstart an entire conversation. Same with the marina-goers: boats are an interest that you can start a convo with. Makes it easy.