3 ms·

One day you’ll find yourself opening a golf umbrella. If you’re not standing on a golf course or in your own backyard, you’re everything that’s wrong with the w

One day you’ll find yourself opening a golf umbrella. If you’re not standing on a golf course or in your own backyard, you’re everything that’s wrong with the world. ok grandpa, what if I'm an adult with a surly child, or if I'm sharing this umbrella with a big bag, a friend, and their big bag?

egypturnash 3y ago
One day you’ll find yourself thinking about quitting a new job. By quitting, you’ll ensure the job won’t work out. By staying a bit longer, though, you’ll at least allow the possibility that it might. And most do. Surely you'll never find yourself in a situation where the job is actively destroying other parts of your life. Surely you'll never find yourself in a situation where the boss is using their position to extract sexual favors from you. Surely you'll never find yourself in a situation where your job is actively detrimental to the world at large, and is making you enough money that you begin to want to shrug and say "everyone does it". Wait, I'm pretty sure it sounds like Grandpa here has done exactly that last one.
- selimthegrim 3y ago
  >Surely you'll never find yourself in a situation where the job is actively destroying other parts of your life. Can confirm.
- egypturnash 3y ago
  one day you’ll find yourself dressing for a flight. Take a stand against casualness and wear a blazer. The pockets are handy for tickets and passports, and you may as well look good—the person sitting next to you could be single. jesus grandpa, I am an adult woman who has taken many flights while single and lemme tell you, the last damn thing I want to think about while I'm flying is flirting with the dude crammed in the seat next to me, I just want to take a nap and get off this nightmare vibrating stress tube ASAP.
  - Mistletoe 3y ago
    I can't think of anything I would hate more on a crowded hot flight than wearing a blazer.
    - noduerme 3y ago
      I imagine that for the author, it goes without saying that one should always fly first class.
    - dublinben 3y ago
      The blazer can be removed once you arrive at your seat, and then folded and stowed atop your luggage overhead.
  - egypturnash 3y ago
    one day you’ll find yourself graduating college. Resist the temptation to move home, even temporarily. Force yourself to find a job, live on a budget, and become an adult. ok grandpa, you do know that most college graduates are now saddled with horrendous college loans that are impossible to get away from, and that living anywhere even remotely desirable requires paying increasingly absurd rents, and yes, that includes that charming town you settled in after your grandparents paid the majority of a tuition that was a tiny fraction of what modern graduates are in hock for, even after adjusting for inflation? You also do know that "leaving your parents and living by yourself" has only been the norm for a brief period of time, and that, in fact, living in the ancestral manse is a great way to accumulate and consolidate pan-generational wealth, as well as to share the burdens of caring for the young, the old, and the infirm?
  - egypturnash 3y ago
    One day, when you are old and think of yourself as wise, you will feel an urge to put together a little book of your attempts at advice. You will be tempted to divide this book into sections, with quotes from various dead white men, all of which lack closing quotes to match their opening quotes. Except for one, which has closing quotes. None of these quotes will be multi-paragraph quotes, which is the only case in which any grammar guides suggest unbalanced closing and opening quotation marks. Resist this temptation. Bonus points: Also resist the temptation to decorate the chapter headers with a red swash, that makes them look a pack of Marlboros. Who the hell even smokes any more, grandpa?
- moduspol 3y ago
  Circumstances vary, but especially in our industry, I've seen way more examples of people staying too long when they should have moved on. Even absent abuse or mistreatment. In my career, I've already done it twice, and I'm in my mid-thirties.
slashdev 3y ago
Haha, I did that one year in Vancouver. I was just tired of arriving to my destination with wet feet. The winter rain in the Pacific Northwest is something else. But you really take up a lot of the sidewalk. I’m tall at least, so I could usually just go over people by raising my arm if needed.
asdfman123 3y ago
It’s probably a guy who’s 47 but thinks he’s old because he’s in tech
wink 3y ago
I had to google golf umbrella and I'm still not sure if it's just the size.

egypturnash 3y ago

One day you’ll find yourself thinking about quitting a new job. By quitting, you’ll ensure the job won’t work out. By staying a bit longer, though, you’ll at least allow the possibility that it might. And most do. Surely you'll never find yourself in a situation where the job is actively destroying other parts of your life. Surely you'll never find yourself in a situation where the boss is using their position to extract sexual favors from you. Surely you'll never find yourself in a situation where your job is actively detrimental to the world at large, and is making you enough money that you begin to want to shrug and say "everyone does it". Wait, I'm pretty sure it sounds like Grandpa here has done exactly that last one.

selimthegrim 3y ago
>Surely you'll never find yourself in a situation where the job is actively destroying other parts of your life. Can confirm.
egypturnash 3y ago
one day you’ll find yourself dressing for a flight. Take a stand against casualness and wear a blazer. The pockets are handy for tickets and passports, and you may as well look good—the person sitting next to you could be single. jesus grandpa, I am an adult woman who has taken many flights while single and lemme tell you, the last damn thing I want to think about while I'm flying is flirting with the dude crammed in the seat next to me, I just want to take a nap and get off this nightmare vibrating stress tube ASAP.
- Mistletoe 3y ago
  I can't think of anything I would hate more on a crowded hot flight than wearing a blazer.
  - noduerme 3y ago
    I imagine that for the author, it goes without saying that one should always fly first class.
  - dublinben 3y ago
    The blazer can be removed once you arrive at your seat, and then folded and stowed atop your luggage overhead.
- egypturnash 3y ago
  one day you’ll find yourself graduating college. Resist the temptation to move home, even temporarily. Force yourself to find a job, live on a budget, and become an adult. ok grandpa, you do know that most college graduates are now saddled with horrendous college loans that are impossible to get away from, and that living anywhere even remotely desirable requires paying increasingly absurd rents, and yes, that includes that charming town you settled in after your grandparents paid the majority of a tuition that was a tiny fraction of what modern graduates are in hock for, even after adjusting for inflation? You also do know that "leaving your parents and living by yourself" has only been the norm for a brief period of time, and that, in fact, living in the ancestral manse is a great way to accumulate and consolidate pan-generational wealth, as well as to share the burdens of caring for the young, the old, and the infirm?
- egypturnash 3y ago
  One day, when you are old and think of yourself as wise, you will feel an urge to put together a little book of your attempts at advice. You will be tempted to divide this book into sections, with quotes from various dead white men, all of which lack closing quotes to match their opening quotes. Except for one, which has closing quotes. None of these quotes will be multi-paragraph quotes, which is the only case in which any grammar guides suggest unbalanced closing and opening quotation marks. Resist this temptation. Bonus points: Also resist the temptation to decorate the chapter headers with a red swash, that makes them look a pack of Marlboros. Who the hell even smokes any more, grandpa?
moduspol 3y ago
Circumstances vary, but especially in our industry, I've seen way more examples of people staying too long when they should have moved on. Even absent abuse or mistreatment. In my career, I've already done it twice, and I'm in my mid-thirties.

slashdev 3y ago

Haha, I did that one year in Vancouver. I was just tired of arriving to my destination with wet feet. The winter rain in the Pacific Northwest is something else. But you really take up a lot of the sidewalk. I’m tall at least, so I could usually just go over people by raising my arm if needed.

asdfman123 3y ago

It’s probably a guy who’s 47 but thinks he’s old because he’s in tech

wink 3y ago

I had to google golf umbrella and I'm still not sure if it's just the size.