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I recall reading an article about two high IQ and talented parents... both professors in very hard academic fields talking about their child and how they were t
by byyyy 3y ago
I recall reading an article about two high IQ and talented parents... both professors in very hard academic fields talking about their child and how they were trying to push their child into roles with high IQ.
The parents were from China too so you can imagine the intensity of this of this pressure.
Then one day the father realized that his child did not inherit the high IQ of both him and his wife. It wasn't a matter of not working hard or being lazy.
He realized the error of his ways... that the intense pressure he put on his daughter was wrong.
I can't seem to find that article anymore. But being Asian myself it really got me thinking and curious whether their are other parents out their who experienced something similar and what's it like for the parent or the child?
Like how does Micheal Jordan react to the fact that his son will never have the abilities he had no matter how much his son tries or how much pressure he puts on him?
- pk-protect-ai 3y agoI can answer this. As a parent of two girls, I used to put a lot of pressure on them to boost their development. However, it took me a while to realize that they were just normal, gifted children who were experiencing too much stress, which was not helping their IQ. I stopped putting pressure on them and now simply love them for who they are. I try to support them as much as I can and avoid the mistake of pushing them too hard. I have explained to them that I want to give them tools to survive in this world, and that I will never be disappointed in them if they can't use these tools.
- throwawaysalome 3y agothat I will never be disappointed in them They may not be gifted but they can see through this lie.
- archagon 3y agoCynical. Some love is unconditional.
- throwawaysalome 3y agoNo one is questioning the love, the sina qua non for disappointment.
- pk-protect-ai 3y agoWhy should I be disappointed in them? It's like being angry at the weather for not suiting you. There are only about 1% of people on Earth with an IQ higher than 145, and even fewer of them realize their potential. However, there are no statistics on how many of these individuals are happy. I would like to do everything possible to make my daughters happy, which is a much more challenging task. They do not need to participate in a rat-race to achieve happiness though.
- pk-protect-ai 3y agoI didn't lie to them. They are my world. As soon as I discovered the stress that pressure was causing them, I stopped pushing it. As far as I know, excessive stress decreases mental capabilities rather than improving them.
- shrimp_emoji 3y agoThere's also indication that "nurture" doesn't matter beyond the basics. The foundation is laid from day zero, and it's just an archive extracting itself into what it is. As long as negative stuff doesn't harm that process, it's as good as it's gonna get.
- byyyy 3y agoFound the article: https://news.yahoo.com/chinese-professor-rants-daughter-lower-184652563.html https://news.yahoo.com/chinese-professor-rants-daughter-lowe...
- HDThoreaun 3y agoLebron recently spoke briefly about his journey with his oldest son and balancing the desire to play with him in the NBA with respecting his sons wishes and being a good parent. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wuNP3QaNpZ0 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wuNP3QaNpZ0