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Do you honestly see value in comparing scars? Does that matter in any meaningful way? The worst stress of someone's life is the worst stress of their life. It'

Do you honestly see value in comparing scars? Does that matter in any meaningful way? The worst stress of someone's life is the worst stress of their life. It's unproductive and petty to bicker about who has it worse. If life is stressful for anyone, regardless of status, title, age, etc. there's a good chance it's undeserved. The takeaway is to treat people better, not dismiss their stressors as less significant.

mouse_ 4y ago
Do you honestly not see how your own narrative could be seen as dismissive to the vast majority of the world? And yes, I do see value in comparing scars, as do most people who do not reside in the high tower. I understand the social rift between you and I is comparable to living on a different planet, and I forgive you for not getting that, but others may not. Please just understand that our current situation is particularly perilous and likely will not last long. I hope you are prepared and able to cope with greater stressors.
- antihipocrat 4y ago
  The physical experience and effects of enduring a stressful environment is the same for everyone regardless of who they are, where they're from, or what they are doing. An equivalent high stress environment can occur whether working in an executive office, working in a call center or selling bracelets on the street. Learning to overcome high stress experiences is a transferrable skill regardless of the context in which it was learned.
  - lcnPylGDnU4H9OF 4y ago
    > An equivalent high stress environment can occur whether working in an executive office, working in a call center or selling bracelets on the street. This doesn't necessarily mean an equivalent high-stress life. The call center employee has fewer or worse options for dealing with stressors outside their job which they share with the executive. > I need to eat. > I need to travel. > I need somewhere to live. By and large these things cost money and the person who doesn't have to worry about having enough money for such things is going to have less stress in their life.
    - datavirtue 4y ago
      ...period. Just because you are overly stressed out about your BMW/Tesla repair saga doesn't mean it is equivalent to someone who NEVER has enough money for basic nessesities. Your luxury car repair drama is fleeting. Being wracked with stress about your entire life 24/7 only lets up when your mind finds a way to squirm out of it for a minute by watching a show or powering through a package of cookies on your couch. Stress is not equivalent across all. Mr BMW has no idea how much his energy bill was last month, smiles every time he pays his mortgage. Single mom carries a past due balance of $800 and barely makes rent each month. Two different, not equivalent, worlds.
      - caddemon 4y ago
        I don't think "BMW repairs" is the main source of stress for high income people lol. I don't know whether it is fair to compare stressors across such different groups, but regardless I don't think it's fair to caricature what high income workers might be stressed about. One of my friends that happens to drive a BMW is a cardiac surgeon, and when he gets stressed over work I can guarantee you it is not about financial implications. In general, management level decisions can affect entire teams of workers and have downstream impacts on products used by millions of people. That is a form of pressure. So is the way pro athletes can be put on the spot, and it's not like their output has huge "real world" impact. Yeah, obviously we'd all rather have pro athlete stress than single working mom stress. But there's 0 reason to strawman what that stress is.
- WalterBright 4y ago
  > our current situation is particularly perilous How so?
  - jessaustin 4y ago
    Our leaders are attempting to start a nuclear war, after twenty years of disastrous wars that have enriched armaments manufacturers while murdering millions of innocents. Working people haven't had a raise since 1971. We spend twice as much on health care as any other nation, but only Peru, Brazil, and several nations in Eastern Europe had worse results from covid. All of Africa cared for covid cases better than we did. I'm sure you can think of other issues.
- fjdiemsloien 4y ago
  What's the worst stress you've ever experienced? What's the worst stress the person you're replying to has ever experienced? I'm very curious about how you know so much about the parent commenter's life compared to your own.
- Cupertino95014 4y ago
  How many of the people claiming that it's "all the same" ever actually talk to any of the low-status people? I mean, where does your knowledge come from?
brookst 4y ago
The parent comment was asserting that STEM types are “high anxiety” and implicitly dismissing non-STEM people as somehow having less anxiety. I think it is fair and healthy to acknowledge that, as you say, everyone has “the worst stress of their life”, regardless of STEM-ness.
- LeroyRaz 4y ago
  I interpreted the comment differently. I thought it was saying that the pressures and anxieties of 'high anxiety' STEM people are not necessarily representative of the average person's experience. I.e. saying that the readers of hacker news are more likely to feel the stresses of feeling the need to be hyper successful, whereas others migh on average be more well adjusted
  - thatfrenchguy 4y ago
    This is what I meant indeed
- jibe 4y ago
  I don’t think it dismissed non-stem people, but there is plenty of data supporting anxiety correlates with intelligence. It is not surprising that HN is an anxious group. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3269637/ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3269637/
nradov 4y ago
I honestly see value in having scars, both the physical and mental varieties. Scars create resilience. We saw this during the recent pandemic. The upper-middle class "high achieving, high anxiety" types who had never faced any real danger or hardship were the most likely to panic and demand all sorts of ridiculous lockdowns and mandates, even though the vast majority of them were never at any significant risk. Whereas blue-collar workers and those accustomed to engaging in physically dangerous activities were generally much more sanguine and level-headed about the whole thing. Some people just need to harden the f*** up and quit catastrophizing every little thing.
- nopeNopeNooope 4y ago
  [dead]
- Apocryphon 4y ago
  Scars innately look different from healthy tissue. The lessons learned in response of trauma can likewise be maladaptive. Certainly people, especially those most self-isolated during the pandemic, could use more contact with the so-called "real world." But not everything formed as part of resilience is as it should be.
- wonderwonder 4y ago
  I don't think that's why the upper middle class demanded lock downs and blue collar didn't. I think the driver was financial stability. Upper middle class likely has a nice emergency fund and could do their job from home. Essentially a nice vacation. Blue collar workers got to choose between welfare and starving.
  - nradov 4y ago
    The blue-collar construction workers and farmers that I know all thought the lockdowns were stupid and ignored the rules. Financial stability or lack thereof was not the reason.
    - wonderwonder 4y ago
mensetmanusman 4y ago
Our new cultural leaders have convinced everyone to out-victim everyone else. The more of a victim you are the better.
- yafbum 4y ago
  Plot twist: our culture is defined by our collective values, not by our leaders. Leaders who tap into narratives of victimhood are only enabled to rise because enough of us like to see themselves as an aggrieved victim of oppression. Including those who see culture as something imposed on them by leaders and see themselves as a victim of cultural wars.
  - mensetmanusman 4y ago
    Culture is imposed upon people by those with power. That’s why our culture is defined by hollywood at the moment.
    - yafbum 4y ago
      ? The most watched news media in America is Fox News. The leading party in Congress is the Republican party. In actual statistical terms and in actual political power terms, that's the definition of mainstream, but somehow those who have the power like to pretend Hollywood has it, so they can sell a narrative of victimhood even as their culture is, just as a matter of fact, the dominant one.
      - mensetmanusman 4y ago
        Less than 2% of Americans watch Fox News, everyone else absorbs cultures from entertainment.

mouse_ 4y ago

Do you honestly not see how your own narrative could be seen as dismissive to the vast majority of the world? And yes, I do see value in comparing scars, as do most people who do not reside in the high tower. I understand the social rift between you and I is comparable to living on a different planet, and I forgive you for not getting that, but others may not. Please just understand that our current situation is particularly perilous and likely will not last long. I hope you are prepared and able to cope with greater stressors.

antihipocrat 4y ago
The physical experience and effects of enduring a stressful environment is the same for everyone regardless of who they are, where they're from, or what they are doing. An equivalent high stress environment can occur whether working in an executive office, working in a call center or selling bracelets on the street. Learning to overcome high stress experiences is a transferrable skill regardless of the context in which it was learned.
- lcnPylGDnU4H9OF 4y ago
  > An equivalent high stress environment can occur whether working in an executive office, working in a call center or selling bracelets on the street. This doesn't necessarily mean an equivalent high-stress life. The call center employee has fewer or worse options for dealing with stressors outside their job which they share with the executive. > I need to eat. > I need to travel. > I need somewhere to live. By and large these things cost money and the person who doesn't have to worry about having enough money for such things is going to have less stress in their life.
  - datavirtue 4y ago
    ...period. Just because you are overly stressed out about your BMW/Tesla repair saga doesn't mean it is equivalent to someone who NEVER has enough money for basic nessesities. Your luxury car repair drama is fleeting. Being wracked with stress about your entire life 24/7 only lets up when your mind finds a way to squirm out of it for a minute by watching a show or powering through a package of cookies on your couch. Stress is not equivalent across all. Mr BMW has no idea how much his energy bill was last month, smiles every time he pays his mortgage. Single mom carries a past due balance of $800 and barely makes rent each month. Two different, not equivalent, worlds.
    - caddemon 4y ago
      I don't think "BMW repairs" is the main source of stress for high income people lol. I don't know whether it is fair to compare stressors across such different groups, but regardless I don't think it's fair to caricature what high income workers might be stressed about. One of my friends that happens to drive a BMW is a cardiac surgeon, and when he gets stressed over work I can guarantee you it is not about financial implications. In general, management level decisions can affect entire teams of workers and have downstream impacts on products used by millions of people. That is a form of pressure. So is the way pro athletes can be put on the spot, and it's not like their output has huge "real world" impact. Yeah, obviously we'd all rather have pro athlete stress than single working mom stress. But there's 0 reason to strawman what that stress is.
WalterBright 4y ago
> our current situation is particularly perilous How so?
- jessaustin 4y ago
  Our leaders are attempting to start a nuclear war, after twenty years of disastrous wars that have enriched armaments manufacturers while murdering millions of innocents. Working people haven't had a raise since 1971. We spend twice as much on health care as any other nation, but only Peru, Brazil, and several nations in Eastern Europe had worse results from covid. All of Africa cared for covid cases better than we did. I'm sure you can think of other issues.
fjdiemsloien 4y ago
What's the worst stress you've ever experienced? What's the worst stress the person you're replying to has ever experienced? I'm very curious about how you know so much about the parent commenter's life compared to your own.
Cupertino95014 4y ago
How many of the people claiming that it's "all the same" ever actually talk to any of the low-status people? I mean, where does your knowledge come from?

brookst 4y ago

The parent comment was asserting that STEM types are “high anxiety” and implicitly dismissing non-STEM people as somehow having less anxiety. I think it is fair and healthy to acknowledge that, as you say, everyone has “the worst stress of their life”, regardless of STEM-ness.

LeroyRaz 4y ago
I interpreted the comment differently. I thought it was saying that the pressures and anxieties of 'high anxiety' STEM people are not necessarily representative of the average person's experience. I.e. saying that the readers of hacker news are more likely to feel the stresses of feeling the need to be hyper successful, whereas others migh on average be more well adjusted
- thatfrenchguy 4y ago
  This is what I meant indeed
jibe 4y ago
I don’t think it dismissed non-stem people, but there is plenty of data supporting anxiety correlates with intelligence. It is not surprising that HN is an anxious group. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3269637/ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3269637/

nradov 4y ago

I honestly see value in having scars, both the physical and mental varieties. Scars create resilience. We saw this during the recent pandemic. The upper-middle class "high achieving, high anxiety" types who had never faced any real danger or hardship were the most likely to panic and demand all sorts of ridiculous lockdowns and mandates, even though the vast majority of them were never at any significant risk. Whereas blue-collar workers and those accustomed to engaging in physically dangerous activities were generally much more sanguine and level-headed about the whole thing. Some people just need to harden the f*** up and quit catastrophizing every little thing.

nopeNopeNooope 4y ago
[dead]
Apocryphon 4y ago
Scars innately look different from healthy tissue. The lessons learned in response of trauma can likewise be maladaptive. Certainly people, especially those most self-isolated during the pandemic, could use more contact with the so-called "real world." But not everything formed as part of resilience is as it should be.
wonderwonder 4y ago
I don't think that's why the upper middle class demanded lock downs and blue collar didn't. I think the driver was financial stability. Upper middle class likely has a nice emergency fund and could do their job from home. Essentially a nice vacation. Blue collar workers got to choose between welfare and starving.
- nradov 4y ago
  The blue-collar construction workers and farmers that I know all thought the lockdowns were stupid and ignored the rules. Financial stability or lack thereof was not the reason.
  - wonderwonder 4y ago

mensetmanusman 4y ago

Our new cultural leaders have convinced everyone to out-victim everyone else. The more of a victim you are the better.

yafbum 4y ago
Plot twist: our culture is defined by our collective values, not by our leaders. Leaders who tap into narratives of victimhood are only enabled to rise because enough of us like to see themselves as an aggrieved victim of oppression. Including those who see culture as something imposed on them by leaders and see themselves as a victim of cultural wars.
- mensetmanusman 4y ago
  Culture is imposed upon people by those with power. That’s why our culture is defined by hollywood at the moment.
  - yafbum 4y ago
    ? The most watched news media in America is Fox News. The leading party in Congress is the Republican party. In actual statistical terms and in actual political power terms, that's the definition of mainstream, but somehow those who have the power like to pretend Hollywood has it, so they can sell a narrative of victimhood even as their culture is, just as a matter of fact, the dominant one.
    - mensetmanusman 4y ago
      Less than 2% of Americans watch Fox News, everyone else absorbs cultures from entertainment.