12 ms·

It’s a short piece, but it resonates with me, specifically this part: > I’m earning the most money I’ve ever made and yet I’m the least fulfilled I’ve ever bee

It’s a short piece, but it resonates with me, specifically this part: > I’m earning the most money I’ve ever made and yet I’m the least fulfilled I’ve ever been. I’m making the most I’ve ever made and I’ve never been less happy and more depressed. I despise being a cog in a huge corporate machine, it’s like the job was designed to be as unappealing as possible. At the same time I can’t get over the fact that I have it better than the vast majority of humanity. I feel guilty hating my job, I won’t complain to people IRL because how could I? I have it made by all accounts. This guilt completely consumes me and adds a special level of self hatred, if I’m not happy with this, maybe I never will be? Unlike the author though I can’t just quit, so endure it I must.

nine_k 4y ago
My approach to that problem is to oscillate between large companies where the pay is extra good and you get to see huge things but the work as a cog is not very appealing, and smaller companies / startups where work is fun and personal growth is noticeable even though it pays less. I think it also accelerates professional growth.
- dylan604 4y ago
  i've done something similar but different. when i get to the absolute breaking point of cannot stand to look at code any longer, i switch industries altogether and go back to a lower paying but much more creative field. once i get tired of essentially being a broke artist, i find a tech job again to start the process over. i also try to stave off the hatred of tech by having creative hobbies, and when i'm being a broke artist i keep up with coding trends to the best of my interest. the staving off of the hatred of tech is getting harder though. the pervasiveness of ad tech and privacy invading tech is just got me just under red lined.
  - daveidol 4y ago
    What kind of art/creative projects do you work on?
    - dylan604 4y ago
      for paying gigs when it's that time, video/photography work. when it's just playing/hobby time, i like to make things by hand that can be used. techy side of my is always tinkering with things to make video/photography stuff like arduino controlled things. i've made my own camera support things by milling aluminium blocks from my own designs. randomly, i even do things like make lye soaps and candles and other bath products. it always gets a raised eyebrow at first, but ends with great big smiles when people try them. it's actually my favorite thing to make simply because of it having that kind of result. jack of many master of few
halfmatthalfcat 4y ago
Planning an exit, if you truly want to leave, is possible and takes time (years). You don’t have to keep on but just know the time horizon is long and you need a solid plan.
- cpsns 4y ago
  The time horizon is long, very long. I may make the most I ever have, but it’s a paltry sum compared to most HNers. One way or another I will leave, it remains to be seen what that will actually mean. For now all I can do is keep putting money away and praying I get lucky.
  - 2muchcoffeeman 4y ago
    I have gotten lucky in a small but not insubstantial way, a couple of times. I still make less than most HNers, but it’s decent for where I am. I don’t know what the exit plan is. It never seems like you have enough. I’ve even looked at minimum retirement savings needed and I should be good for my current lifestyle, but I don’t feel like the numbers are right or I keep coming up with excuses. There is a lot of anxiety around this.
    - thowaway959125 4y ago
      One small screw-up and it can be all over. I know it first hand. I got completely burnt out, ended up drinking too much, and lost everything. At least with this career there is a chance to start over, depending on age and compensation. But one small slip-up, whether it be a serious medical problem (especially in the US) or otherwise, and the "numbers" can be thrown out the window. Fingers crossed.
- balaji1 4y ago
  society/civilization[/state/government] was meant to collectively make it better for the next generation in general. But society is not on that path anymore, it seems like there is serious decline happening in terms of quality of life all around the world. Everywhere seems to be converging to a consumerist, busier, fast, urban, sickly lifestyle. On the flip side, it has never been easier for parents to ensure prosperity to their children. For some people, if your parents [and or spouse's parents when applicable] have saved enough to de-risk your [and your siblings'] financial situation; are there anecdotes of how to leverage that to exit the rat race [or probably not enter at all]?
divbzero 4y ago
Remember that there are a range of options between highly-paid cog and financially-independent early retiree: jobs that pay less or jobs with higher uncertainty that care more fulfilling than the huge corporate machine. You could potentially find a better situation without quitting altogether.
- geraldwhen 4y ago
  Or you go full corporate but cut your hours by interleaving things you enjoy, like hobbies or gym time. What happens if you take a 90 minute bike ride each day without changing your hours at all? Would anyone notice? Would they care? Work is about dollars per hour. Salary is a trick.
  - larrymyers 4y ago
    That's kinda the whole point of being salaried though isn't it? (At least for those of us in the US.) You are an exempt employee as defined by US labor law. You aren't required to receive overtime pay, and you are evaluated on your expertise and the results you deliver. So if you can get in daily rides and still meet the expectations of your employer, awesome, you're doing it right. You're likely also doing right by your employer, since the daily exercise is giving you lots of health benefits and keeping you performing at a high level mentally.
    - sunsunsunsun 4y ago
      Tell this to my employer. They require me to log >= 40 hours per week, they have no problem with overtime but get a stick up their ass about undertime. I lie pretty much every week on my timesheet unless I happen to do overtime that week. Most people I talk to in the company do the same.
      - wombatpm 4y ago
        Do your hours get billed to a contract or client? Then it makes sense. It’s just a shitty contract that does not account for overhead properly If it doesn’t, then you are just working for assholes
BaseballPhysics 4y ago
Bluntly, every person I know who's expressed these kinds of sentiments is guilty of the same mistake: externalizing their happiness. They inevitably move, only to find the new place they're in sucks, just in different ways. Or they find another job, but just discover more things they hate there. Or they find a new partner, only to discover a new set of annoyances. The same psychology leads people to think they'll be happy if they finally get that new car, or that new house, or that new TV. All of it comes from the same place: assuming that happiness is something you can find by simply changing your circumstances. Now, don't get me wrong, there are absolutely good reasons to want to change those circumstances! But it's critical to understand that oftentimes there is no one change of circumstances, one decision, one thing that will result in happiness. I know it's a cliche, but I think I'm old enough now to confidently say that, yes: Happiness really does start from within.
- lapcat 4y ago
  > I think I'm old enough now to confidently say that, yes: Happiness really does start from within. What does age have to do with it? You're one person. It's anecdotal data. I'm old enough now (5 years later) to confidently say that, yes: Quitting my last job really did make me happier.
  - BaseballPhysics 4y ago
    > What does age have to do with it? You're one person. It's anecdotal data. Actually an entire field of psychology is based on the idea: cognitive behavioral therapy. But you seem like you need to pick a fight, and I'm honestly not in the mood, so carry on.
    - deleted 4y ago
      [deleted]
    - lapcat 4y ago
      > you need to pick a fight, and I'm honestly not in the mood "Bluntly, every person I know who's expressed these kinds of sentiments is guilty of the same mistake"
vernon99 4y ago
A quick comment: it doesn’t make sense to compare your life and level of happiness with other people. Why not to compare with ancient doom and gloom times? What would it change to realize that you are better off than 100% of roman empire citizens? Why does it even matter? This sounds like a very weak argument meant to give you an alibi against another part of you that is unhappy, but - it just doesn’t. The ONLY thing that is real is how YOU feel.
- chii 4y ago
  it's understandable why people compare - some people can only be happy if they're "at the top", which must necessitate comparison.
88913527 4y ago
Generally speaking, most people are at the point where "this is the most they've ever made". Inflation and the passing of time in a given career will do that.
- cpsns 4y ago
  Fair enough, though I have taken steps back in salary before.
nicolas_ 4y ago
I’m earning the most money I’ve ever made and I’m the happiest I’ve ever been even. It doesn't mean everything in my life is perfect, far from it, but that money is a huge help. Doubling my salary and being paid what I am worth by doing what I wanted to do brought me a peace of mind I never had in the last five years (since I immigrated to a new country). I do not have to worry about so many things anymore, it's truly amazing and liberating. I can focus on what truly matters. I can take risks. I can plan for the future without having to go to the depression realm of looking for a better paying job. Did I hate the jobs I did before? Some of them, but the money aspect stressed me a thousand times more than the work itself. When you don't like your job and do not have the money, you have to worry about both. When it's only your job, you know what to focus on and if you have enough savings, you can be bold and take risks. A few years ago, I read this NYT article titled "Your Job Will Never Love You Back" [1] and that tagline is stuck in my head since then. Your work doesn't define you and even your dream work will have boring parts. I'd suggest to go to therapy to focus and work on yourself. Better days are yet to come! [1] https://www.nytimes.com/2019/10/24/business/your-job-will-never-love-you-back.html https://www.nytimes.com/2019/10/24/business/your-job-will-ne...
- biinui 4y ago
  If you don't mind, which country did you come from and immigrated to? :)
  - nicolas_ 4y ago
    Sure! France -> Canada
flashgordon 4y ago
Q for all who are expressing this. A lot of job descriptions today emphasize a passion for "making impact". What is lost on most of us is impact by numbers rather than impact by percentages. Eg being part of a 1000 person <insert branded platform team> your one line fix is experienced by a billion users for a minute a year. Billion sounds sexy doesn't it? Impact by numbers. How does one frame the other way. Ie I don't care if only a 1000 users experience it, but I'd rather be part of a 10 person team pushing out while features used by 1000 users for hours each day. I dunno if such roles exist and pay reasonably enough and are sustainable? And how does one politely disregard other kinds of impact in favor of this?
- tjridesbikes 4y ago
  They definitely exist. I’m a fairly compensated developer at a biotech non-profit. We only have tens of thousands of users of the product I work on, but the value my changes and features make is impactful because researchers are using our platform for hours every day to do research towards curing genetic diseases. I work 40-ish hours a week, have ample vacation, and am paid enough to own a fairly basic condo in Boston, all by my late 20s. It’s not glamorous, I don’t earn $300k+ a year, and it’s certainly not a prestigious resume entry, but hey, I like my life so far. It’s definitely sustainable. Enough so that my wife and I will probably start a family soon.
- nix0n 4y ago
  I had a job like this for a few years. Escalated tech support went to the actual developers, so you really felt that impact. For software to be sustainable with only 1000 users, it's got to be something that a small number of people use to do their jobs. Look for B2B software targeting a small niche. The other route is software that is trying to get to a billion users, and just isn't there yet. If you get into a startup scene, you can definitely make a career of it.
- Derbasti 4y ago
  I once developed a video game plugin for a niche flight simulator, that was subsequently bought by a few thousand people. Their response left me flabbergasted: They thanked me! Personally, by email. They actually took out time of their own busy life to write a simple thank you note. Never in my professional life have I experienced a response anything like this. Not as a researcher, being harassed and scolded by reviewers. Not as an embedded dev, by users or contractors being blissfully unaware of my existence. Not as an open source dev, hidden behind a pseudonym and fake "professionalism" in Github bug reports. The closest thing was perhaps professional recognition amongst colleagues. I'd rather make a big personal impact on a small number of people than a small incremental impact on a large number of people. It's way more satisfying. Come to think of it, teaching and mentoring work similarly.
karmelapple 4y ago
May I ask what type of work you’re doing? I think there’s a huge difference in the value we feel ourselves contributing based on our own interests and what our company does. I am working in the world of peer reviewed research now, and I think that’s one of the best places I can contribute to. I’m proud every day to start working because I know I’m helping, even in a small way, the many researchers around the world moving human knowledge forward. I used to work in avionics development, mostly for defense purposes. Some people would hate it. I liked it for awhile, and then I reached the end of learning new things there. I left shortly after that to start my own company, the peer review research-focused one. I never want to work for ad tech. That’s not the right answer for everyone, but I’d I was working in ad tech, I’d probably feel similar to you. What do you work on, and how does that sync with your world view?
tiffanyh 4y ago
> I despise being a cog in a huge corporate machine, it’s like the job was designed to be as unappealing as possible. How much of your unhappiness is your job, or more so a function of having a continually growing list of responsibilities that can become to feel suffocating (e.g., marriage, kids, managing people at work, etc). Because it can be a taboo subject, I’ve seen people misattribute their unhappiness to a single thing when it’s really a culmination of many things … and their isn’t a way to “fix” the unhappiness (you can’t “un-have” a kid)
- kudokatz 4y ago
  > How much of your unhappiness is your job, or more so a function of having a continually growing list of responsibilities I have none of the other, suggested, confounding factors. Quitting my last job was fantastic and 100% the best thing I could have conceived of to improve my life. I also had a very similar sentiment re: cog+machine, although found it more of a combination of amusing and tragic (rather than unappealing).
- cpsns 4y ago
  I have no kids and I have no relationships. I don’t manage people though work, though they’d like me more involved in a bunch of stuff. All I have is the cat and a house and the house actually brought me some peace of mind. The idea of fathering a child is legitimate nightmare fuel for me. I already feel trapped as it is, though thankfully there’s no risk of it happening.
paulpauper 4y ago
If you think you feel bad being a cog and making a lot of, money, imagine how much it sucks being a cog and making much less in the service sector. Go to a Chipotle..there is a near 100% likelihood that the people preparing your food hate their jobs way more than you hate yours.
- gymbeaux 4y ago
  If I worked a blue-collar/service job, making 1/5th what I make as a SWE, having to commute, stand on my feet all day, deal with customers... I'd do drugs. Like I get it. I get why people do drugs. I get why people don't save money for retirement. Life sucks SO MUCH, that it's basically the daily $5 Starbucks drink or suicide. Make no mistake, for most people, life fucking sucks. Then some of you come into that Chipotle and cop an attitude because the cashier misheard you or they got your order wrong or whatever.
  - thowaway959125 4y ago
    > Make no mistake, for most people, life fucking sucks. And for many, it's one small slip-up, poor choices, medical problems, etc. and they may have to look forward to these sorts of jobs ... potentially until they drop. I have no back-up plan, and ageism is a thing. I have to play this software engineering game for as long as I can to avoid the service sector when I'm older. And I have to play it very carefully. Right now I'm sitting pretty, good income, unlimited vacation, work from anywhere. A "dream" job. But for how much longer? Fingers crossed. I am not sure about turning to drugs, that would likely amplify the hell and make suicide even more of a viable option. It's a grim outlook, I try not to think about it.
    - gymbeaux 4y ago
      Agism is a thing, in both directions. I believe I have been discriminated against for being the youngest person on the team (I often was until mid/late 20s). Definitely though it will become an issue later in life, though I have to wonder if agism really will be a problem for us, or if it will be that we simply quit the rat race of keeping up with the industry. I'm thinking about all the older developers/engineers I have worked with over the years, and they all had one thing in common- they did not or would not keep up with the industry. Some were working with System Z mainframe stuff, some were working with VB.NET, and most moved into management. Management is certainly one way you could save yourself from aging out (whether through agism or not keeping up).
nextlevelwizard 4y ago
>I’m making the most I’ve ever made and I’ve never been less happy and more depressed. Maybe this is something related to older generations, but I for one have never been happier. Of course my life isn't perfect, but I would never in a million years go back to my childhood/teens/yearly 20s. I have so much more freedom to express my self, to move in the world, to see and experience things and just in general do whatever I want. I never had the capital necessary or capability to do any of these things when I was a kid. >I despise being a cog in a huge corporate machine, it’s like the job was designed to be as unappealing as possible. Of course I can't speak for anyone else, but I think this is part of the "dream job" myth i.e. "if you work a job you love you don't need to work a day in your lift". This is pretty much garbage advice and only works for few rare people. I accidentally fell into my niche. I don't think I would have ever applied for position such as mine, but as new graduate I got an offer that was too good to pass by (however I expected to work here for couple years, gain some money, and then move to a bigger city and find job in my actual field), but when I started I just decided that I was going to be the best in my team/department. I took couple hours every day from work time to study and I became a professional. I wouldn't say I love my job, but I'm good at it and that makes my proud which in turn gives me joy. I've been doing pretty much same thing for almost a decade now and I've never been happier.
biinui 4y ago
If you don't mind and sorry for being insensitive, why can't you just quit?
- BizarreByte 4y ago
  The bills aren’t going to pay themselves and jobs are limited where I live. It’s remote or nothing and remote is getting harder to find.

nine_k 4y ago

My approach to that problem is to oscillate between large companies where the pay is extra good and you get to see huge things but the work as a cog is not very appealing, and smaller companies / startups where work is fun and personal growth is noticeable even though it pays less. I think it also accelerates professional growth.

dylan604 4y ago
i've done something similar but different. when i get to the absolute breaking point of cannot stand to look at code any longer, i switch industries altogether and go back to a lower paying but much more creative field. once i get tired of essentially being a broke artist, i find a tech job again to start the process over. i also try to stave off the hatred of tech by having creative hobbies, and when i'm being a broke artist i keep up with coding trends to the best of my interest. the staving off of the hatred of tech is getting harder though. the pervasiveness of ad tech and privacy invading tech is just got me just under red lined.
- daveidol 4y ago
  What kind of art/creative projects do you work on?
  - dylan604 4y ago
    for paying gigs when it's that time, video/photography work. when it's just playing/hobby time, i like to make things by hand that can be used. techy side of my is always tinkering with things to make video/photography stuff like arduino controlled things. i've made my own camera support things by milling aluminium blocks from my own designs. randomly, i even do things like make lye soaps and candles and other bath products. it always gets a raised eyebrow at first, but ends with great big smiles when people try them. it's actually my favorite thing to make simply because of it having that kind of result. jack of many master of few

halfmatthalfcat 4y ago

Planning an exit, if you truly want to leave, is possible and takes time (years). You don’t have to keep on but just know the time horizon is long and you need a solid plan.

cpsns 4y ago
The time horizon is long, very long. I may make the most I ever have, but it’s a paltry sum compared to most HNers. One way or another I will leave, it remains to be seen what that will actually mean. For now all I can do is keep putting money away and praying I get lucky.
- 2muchcoffeeman 4y ago
  I have gotten lucky in a small but not insubstantial way, a couple of times. I still make less than most HNers, but it’s decent for where I am. I don’t know what the exit plan is. It never seems like you have enough. I’ve even looked at minimum retirement savings needed and I should be good for my current lifestyle, but I don’t feel like the numbers are right or I keep coming up with excuses. There is a lot of anxiety around this.
  - thowaway959125 4y ago
    One small screw-up and it can be all over. I know it first hand. I got completely burnt out, ended up drinking too much, and lost everything. At least with this career there is a chance to start over, depending on age and compensation. But one small slip-up, whether it be a serious medical problem (especially in the US) or otherwise, and the "numbers" can be thrown out the window. Fingers crossed.
balaji1 4y ago
society/civilization[/state/government] was meant to collectively make it better for the next generation in general. But society is not on that path anymore, it seems like there is serious decline happening in terms of quality of life all around the world. Everywhere seems to be converging to a consumerist, busier, fast, urban, sickly lifestyle. On the flip side, it has never been easier for parents to ensure prosperity to their children. For some people, if your parents [and or spouse's parents when applicable] have saved enough to de-risk your [and your siblings'] financial situation; are there anecdotes of how to leverage that to exit the rat race [or probably not enter at all]?

divbzero 4y ago

Remember that there are a range of options between highly-paid cog and financially-independent early retiree: jobs that pay less or jobs with higher uncertainty that care more fulfilling than the huge corporate machine. You could potentially find a better situation without quitting altogether.

geraldwhen 4y ago
Or you go full corporate but cut your hours by interleaving things you enjoy, like hobbies or gym time. What happens if you take a 90 minute bike ride each day without changing your hours at all? Would anyone notice? Would they care? Work is about dollars per hour. Salary is a trick.
- larrymyers 4y ago
  That's kinda the whole point of being salaried though isn't it? (At least for those of us in the US.) You are an exempt employee as defined by US labor law. You aren't required to receive overtime pay, and you are evaluated on your expertise and the results you deliver. So if you can get in daily rides and still meet the expectations of your employer, awesome, you're doing it right. You're likely also doing right by your employer, since the daily exercise is giving you lots of health benefits and keeping you performing at a high level mentally.
  - sunsunsunsun 4y ago
    Tell this to my employer. They require me to log >= 40 hours per week, they have no problem with overtime but get a stick up their ass about undertime. I lie pretty much every week on my timesheet unless I happen to do overtime that week. Most people I talk to in the company do the same.
    - wombatpm 4y ago
      Do your hours get billed to a contract or client? Then it makes sense. It’s just a shitty contract that does not account for overhead properly If it doesn’t, then you are just working for assholes

BaseballPhysics 4y ago

Bluntly, every person I know who's expressed these kinds of sentiments is guilty of the same mistake: externalizing their happiness. They inevitably move, only to find the new place they're in sucks, just in different ways. Or they find another job, but just discover more things they hate there. Or they find a new partner, only to discover a new set of annoyances. The same psychology leads people to think they'll be happy if they finally get that new car, or that new house, or that new TV. All of it comes from the same place: assuming that happiness is something you can find by simply changing your circumstances. Now, don't get me wrong, there are absolutely good reasons to want to change those circumstances! But it's critical to understand that oftentimes there is no one change of circumstances, one decision, one thing that will result in happiness. I know it's a cliche, but I think I'm old enough now to confidently say that, yes: Happiness really does start from within.

lapcat 4y ago
> I think I'm old enough now to confidently say that, yes: Happiness really does start from within. What does age have to do with it? You're one person. It's anecdotal data. I'm old enough now (5 years later) to confidently say that, yes: Quitting my last job really did make me happier.
- BaseballPhysics 4y ago
  > What does age have to do with it? You're one person. It's anecdotal data. Actually an entire field of psychology is based on the idea: cognitive behavioral therapy. But you seem like you need to pick a fight, and I'm honestly not in the mood, so carry on.
  - deleted 4y ago
    [deleted]
  - lapcat 4y ago
    > you need to pick a fight, and I'm honestly not in the mood "Bluntly, every person I know who's expressed these kinds of sentiments is guilty of the same mistake"

vernon99 4y ago

A quick comment: it doesn’t make sense to compare your life and level of happiness with other people. Why not to compare with ancient doom and gloom times? What would it change to realize that you are better off than 100% of roman empire citizens? Why does it even matter? This sounds like a very weak argument meant to give you an alibi against another part of you that is unhappy, but - it just doesn’t. The ONLY thing that is real is how YOU feel.

chii 4y ago
it's understandable why people compare - some people can only be happy if they're "at the top", which must necessitate comparison.

88913527 4y ago

Generally speaking, most people are at the point where "this is the most they've ever made". Inflation and the passing of time in a given career will do that.

cpsns 4y ago
Fair enough, though I have taken steps back in salary before.

nicolas_ 4y ago

I’m earning the most money I’ve ever made and I’m the happiest I’ve ever been even. It doesn't mean everything in my life is perfect, far from it, but that money is a huge help. Doubling my salary and being paid what I am worth by doing what I wanted to do brought me a peace of mind I never had in the last five years (since I immigrated to a new country). I do not have to worry about so many things anymore, it's truly amazing and liberating. I can focus on what truly matters. I can take risks. I can plan for the future without having to go to the depression realm of looking for a better paying job. Did I hate the jobs I did before? Some of them, but the money aspect stressed me a thousand times more than the work itself. When you don't like your job and do not have the money, you have to worry about both. When it's only your job, you know what to focus on and if you have enough savings, you can be bold and take risks. A few years ago, I read this NYT article titled "Your Job Will Never Love You Back" [1] and that tagline is stuck in my head since then. Your work doesn't define you and even your dream work will have boring parts. I'd suggest to go to therapy to focus and work on yourself. Better days are yet to come! [1] https://www.nytimes.com/2019/10/24/business/your-job-will-never-love-you-back.html https://www.nytimes.com/2019/10/24/business/your-job-will-ne...

biinui 4y ago
If you don't mind, which country did you come from and immigrated to? :)
- nicolas_ 4y ago
  Sure! France -> Canada

flashgordon 4y ago

Q for all who are expressing this. A lot of job descriptions today emphasize a passion for "making impact". What is lost on most of us is impact by numbers rather than impact by percentages. Eg being part of a 1000 person <insert branded platform team> your one line fix is experienced by a billion users for a minute a year. Billion sounds sexy doesn't it? Impact by numbers. How does one frame the other way. Ie I don't care if only a 1000 users experience it, but I'd rather be part of a 10 person team pushing out while features used by 1000 users for hours each day. I dunno if such roles exist and pay reasonably enough and are sustainable? And how does one politely disregard other kinds of impact in favor of this?

tjridesbikes 4y ago
They definitely exist. I’m a fairly compensated developer at a biotech non-profit. We only have tens of thousands of users of the product I work on, but the value my changes and features make is impactful because researchers are using our platform for hours every day to do research towards curing genetic diseases. I work 40-ish hours a week, have ample vacation, and am paid enough to own a fairly basic condo in Boston, all by my late 20s. It’s not glamorous, I don’t earn $300k+ a year, and it’s certainly not a prestigious resume entry, but hey, I like my life so far. It’s definitely sustainable. Enough so that my wife and I will probably start a family soon.
nix0n 4y ago
I had a job like this for a few years. Escalated tech support went to the actual developers, so you really felt that impact. For software to be sustainable with only 1000 users, it's got to be something that a small number of people use to do their jobs. Look for B2B software targeting a small niche. The other route is software that is trying to get to a billion users, and just isn't there yet. If you get into a startup scene, you can definitely make a career of it.
Derbasti 4y ago
I once developed a video game plugin for a niche flight simulator, that was subsequently bought by a few thousand people. Their response left me flabbergasted: They thanked me! Personally, by email. They actually took out time of their own busy life to write a simple thank you note. Never in my professional life have I experienced a response anything like this. Not as a researcher, being harassed and scolded by reviewers. Not as an embedded dev, by users or contractors being blissfully unaware of my existence. Not as an open source dev, hidden behind a pseudonym and fake "professionalism" in Github bug reports. The closest thing was perhaps professional recognition amongst colleagues. I'd rather make a big personal impact on a small number of people than a small incremental impact on a large number of people. It's way more satisfying. Come to think of it, teaching and mentoring work similarly.

karmelapple 4y ago

May I ask what type of work you’re doing? I think there’s a huge difference in the value we feel ourselves contributing based on our own interests and what our company does. I am working in the world of peer reviewed research now, and I think that’s one of the best places I can contribute to. I’m proud every day to start working because I know I’m helping, even in a small way, the many researchers around the world moving human knowledge forward. I used to work in avionics development, mostly for defense purposes. Some people would hate it. I liked it for awhile, and then I reached the end of learning new things there. I left shortly after that to start my own company, the peer review research-focused one. I never want to work for ad tech. That’s not the right answer for everyone, but I’d I was working in ad tech, I’d probably feel similar to you. What do you work on, and how does that sync with your world view?

tiffanyh 4y ago

> I despise being a cog in a huge corporate machine, it’s like the job was designed to be as unappealing as possible. How much of your unhappiness is your job, or more so a function of having a continually growing list of responsibilities that can become to feel suffocating (e.g., marriage, kids, managing people at work, etc). Because it can be a taboo subject, I’ve seen people misattribute their unhappiness to a single thing when it’s really a culmination of many things … and their isn’t a way to “fix” the unhappiness (you can’t “un-have” a kid)

kudokatz 4y ago
> How much of your unhappiness is your job, or more so a function of having a continually growing list of responsibilities I have none of the other, suggested, confounding factors. Quitting my last job was fantastic and 100% the best thing I could have conceived of to improve my life. I also had a very similar sentiment re: cog+machine, although found it more of a combination of amusing and tragic (rather than unappealing).
cpsns 4y ago
I have no kids and I have no relationships. I don’t manage people though work, though they’d like me more involved in a bunch of stuff. All I have is the cat and a house and the house actually brought me some peace of mind. The idea of fathering a child is legitimate nightmare fuel for me. I already feel trapped as it is, though thankfully there’s no risk of it happening.

paulpauper 4y ago

If you think you feel bad being a cog and making a lot of, money, imagine how much it sucks being a cog and making much less in the service sector. Go to a Chipotle..there is a near 100% likelihood that the people preparing your food hate their jobs way more than you hate yours.

gymbeaux 4y ago
If I worked a blue-collar/service job, making 1/5th what I make as a SWE, having to commute, stand on my feet all day, deal with customers... I'd do drugs. Like I get it. I get why people do drugs. I get why people don't save money for retirement. Life sucks SO MUCH, that it's basically the daily $5 Starbucks drink or suicide. Make no mistake, for most people, life fucking sucks. Then some of you come into that Chipotle and cop an attitude because the cashier misheard you or they got your order wrong or whatever.
- thowaway959125 4y ago
  > Make no mistake, for most people, life fucking sucks. And for many, it's one small slip-up, poor choices, medical problems, etc. and they may have to look forward to these sorts of jobs ... potentially until they drop. I have no back-up plan, and ageism is a thing. I have to play this software engineering game for as long as I can to avoid the service sector when I'm older. And I have to play it very carefully. Right now I'm sitting pretty, good income, unlimited vacation, work from anywhere. A "dream" job. But for how much longer? Fingers crossed. I am not sure about turning to drugs, that would likely amplify the hell and make suicide even more of a viable option. It's a grim outlook, I try not to think about it.
  - gymbeaux 4y ago
    Agism is a thing, in both directions. I believe I have been discriminated against for being the youngest person on the team (I often was until mid/late 20s). Definitely though it will become an issue later in life, though I have to wonder if agism really will be a problem for us, or if it will be that we simply quit the rat race of keeping up with the industry. I'm thinking about all the older developers/engineers I have worked with over the years, and they all had one thing in common- they did not or would not keep up with the industry. Some were working with System Z mainframe stuff, some were working with VB.NET, and most moved into management. Management is certainly one way you could save yourself from aging out (whether through agism or not keeping up).

nextlevelwizard 4y ago

>I’m making the most I’ve ever made and I’ve never been less happy and more depressed. Maybe this is something related to older generations, but I for one have never been happier. Of course my life isn't perfect, but I would never in a million years go back to my childhood/teens/yearly 20s. I have so much more freedom to express my self, to move in the world, to see and experience things and just in general do whatever I want. I never had the capital necessary or capability to do any of these things when I was a kid. >I despise being a cog in a huge corporate machine, it’s like the job was designed to be as unappealing as possible. Of course I can't speak for anyone else, but I think this is part of the "dream job" myth i.e. "if you work a job you love you don't need to work a day in your lift". This is pretty much garbage advice and only works for few rare people. I accidentally fell into my niche. I don't think I would have ever applied for position such as mine, but as new graduate I got an offer that was too good to pass by (however I expected to work here for couple years, gain some money, and then move to a bigger city and find job in my actual field), but when I started I just decided that I was going to be the best in my team/department. I took couple hours every day from work time to study and I became a professional. I wouldn't say I love my job, but I'm good at it and that makes my proud which in turn gives me joy. I've been doing pretty much same thing for almost a decade now and I've never been happier.

biinui 4y ago

If you don't mind and sorry for being insensitive, why can't you just quit?

BizarreByte 4y ago
The bills aren’t going to pay themselves and jobs are limited where I live. It’s remote or nothing and remote is getting harder to find.