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Author is 5, 0.. Her husband 5, 6. > My husband, who is 5-foot-6, said it would have been easier to be tall than to have had to put effort into developing his

Author is 5, 0.. Her husband 5, 6. > My husband, who is 5-foot-6, said it would have been easier to be tall than to have had to put effort into developing his wit, but I know we wouldn’t be married if he didn’t make my cheeks hurt from smiling so hard on our first date. As a shorter guy myself, no amount of good jokes will make up for being shorter than a girl who just "isn't interested in shorter guys".

Der_Einzige 4y ago
What he, and many other men do to signal that they're attractive even though they are short, is to "Jestermax" or "goofmax". I believe it deserves it's implied perjorative sound.
- gavinray 4y ago
  I'm 5'6, my wife is 5'8, and the first girl I ever went out on a date with was 5'10. I won't say "It's all in your head", because it's not. Attractiveness is a real and very objective thing we can measure. But "how much it bothers you", or "how much it gets in your head" is also a very real and objective thing, too. Of course, no man/woman is going to want you if you yourself even go "Oh woe is me I'm so short and awful". Most of my friends who are alone and blame it on their height are like this.
  - bradlys 4y ago
    Height is just one metric. You might have a stellar face - which is actually the most important metric in todays dating market. But having a great face and being short, bald, and obese isn’t going to lead you to winning results either. The standards are high and some people will always be alone due to looks - please stop using the just world fallacy.
- throwaway920102 4y ago
  I'm sorry, but implying that developing a good personality is compensating is itself a form of bigotry. Just as it would be if I said "what she did to signal that she was intelligent despite being a woman was to 'mathmax' or 'logicmax'". In the analogy I'd be dismissing a woman's math ability as compensation for women's inferior intelligence, rather than just saying she worked hard at math or is naturally talented at math and that is cool. In your actual post, you imply that short men can't _just_ be funny. Or _just_ have a good personality, without it being somehow tied to compensating for your own perceived negative qualities of being short.
  - Clamchop 4y ago
    Society seems to value the appearance of effortlessness whether it be skills, fashion, knowledge, social graces, etc. Grandparent's criticisms are just more specific versions of calling someone a "try hard". Presumably they are punching down on people who appear to be trying a little too hard to be funny. It's a shame. Being entertaining is a skill that has to be developed and sometimes it's going to look like quite a lot of work and won't be entirely successful. The audience isn't sympathetic, though, and will cry "cringe" and muse about whatever deficiency you must be making up for.
jesusofnazarath 4y ago
[dead]
deleted 4y ago
[deleted]
quacked 4y ago
As the saying goes, "Girls don't like guys that make them laugh, guys that they like make them laugh"
petodo 4y ago
Truth and author is also stupid enough to assume tall people can't be funny and they can't put effort into developing their wit and beat everyone at their game - funny short/fat people or good looking tall people.
- lapcat 4y ago
  > author is also stupid enough to assume tall people can't be funny The author is not stupid, nor did she assume this.

Der_Einzige 4y ago

What he, and many other men do to signal that they're attractive even though they are short, is to "Jestermax" or "goofmax". I believe it deserves it's implied perjorative sound.

gavinray 4y ago
I'm 5'6, my wife is 5'8, and the first girl I ever went out on a date with was 5'10. I won't say "It's all in your head", because it's not. Attractiveness is a real and very objective thing we can measure. But "how much it bothers you", or "how much it gets in your head" is also a very real and objective thing, too. Of course, no man/woman is going to want you if you yourself even go "Oh woe is me I'm so short and awful". Most of my friends who are alone and blame it on their height are like this.
- bradlys 4y ago
  Height is just one metric. You might have a stellar face - which is actually the most important metric in todays dating market. But having a great face and being short, bald, and obese isn’t going to lead you to winning results either. The standards are high and some people will always be alone due to looks - please stop using the just world fallacy.
throwaway920102 4y ago
I'm sorry, but implying that developing a good personality is compensating is itself a form of bigotry. Just as it would be if I said "what she did to signal that she was intelligent despite being a woman was to 'mathmax' or 'logicmax'". In the analogy I'd be dismissing a woman's math ability as compensation for women's inferior intelligence, rather than just saying she worked hard at math or is naturally talented at math and that is cool. In your actual post, you imply that short men can't _just_ be funny. Or _just_ have a good personality, without it being somehow tied to compensating for your own perceived negative qualities of being short.
- Clamchop 4y ago
  Society seems to value the appearance of effortlessness whether it be skills, fashion, knowledge, social graces, etc. Grandparent's criticisms are just more specific versions of calling someone a "try hard". Presumably they are punching down on people who appear to be trying a little too hard to be funny. It's a shame. Being entertaining is a skill that has to be developed and sometimes it's going to look like quite a lot of work and won't be entirely successful. The audience isn't sympathetic, though, and will cry "cringe" and muse about whatever deficiency you must be making up for.

jesusofnazarath 4y ago

[dead]

deleted 4y ago

[deleted]

quacked 4y ago

As the saying goes, "Girls don't like guys that make them laugh, guys that they like make them laugh"

petodo 4y ago

Truth and author is also stupid enough to assume tall people can't be funny and they can't put effort into developing their wit and beat everyone at their game - funny short/fat people or good looking tall people.

lapcat 4y ago
> author is also stupid enough to assume tall people can't be funny The author is not stupid, nor did she assume this.