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Ask HN: What is the best advice you received in 2022?

• samsquire 4y ago
  I did receive some advice relating to the gospel about fighting or letting God deal with my problems. But here's my advice to you. This is my command to you: love eachother.
  • aaws11 4y ago
    hugs.
• DantesKite 4y ago
  For stocks: “Cash is a position.”
• rammy1234 4y ago
  https://lazydevstories.com/post/advice2022/ https://lazydevstories.com/post/advice2022/
• sideshowb 4y ago
  I was advised that generic advice isn't useful
  • blackbear_ 4y ago
    Hm, I cannot decide whether this advice is useful or not
  • deleted 4y ago
    [deleted]
  • mejutoco 4y ago
    The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on Oscar Wilde
  • aaws11 4y ago
    generic advice is useful, as long as you know how to apply it in the right scenarios. else it's just mental mastication
• awillen 4y ago
  If something needs to be done, and it takes less than two minutes to do, just do it right now.
  • aaws11 4y ago
    the problem is when it takes way longer than you thought it would and then you feel regrets for why you started in the first place. kinda like going down the rabbit-hole of building an automated solution to save 15 minutes of manual data entry
    • awillen 4y ago
      That's why I stick to two minutes... this is about washing that dish instead of leaving it in the sink rather than problem solving.
      • aaws11 4y ago
        eat that frog. gotcha!
• qup 4y ago
  https://waitbutwhy.com/2013/10/why-procrastinators-procrastinate.html https://waitbutwhy.com/2013/10/why-procrastinators-procrasti... It's old, but timeless, and I found it last month. Naming these concepts has made them easier to identify and has put me back in the driver's seat
  • floppydiskette 4y ago
    Thanks for this! I’ve never read it. I can relate a lot. I immediately bought a plushie of the Panic Monster.
  • llanowarelves 4y ago
    One man's procrastination is another man's prioritization.
  • loganc2342 4y ago
    Thank you so much for sharing this, I had never seen it before and it hit home more than any article I’ve ever read.
    • qup 4y ago
      Now bitch slap the monkey
  • SturgeonsLaw 4y ago
    Nice, an article I can read instead of cleaning the house!
• noud 4y ago
  I'm not responsible for solving other people's problems and behavior.
  • ipnon 4y ago
    “I can fix them,” famous last words …
• juangacovas 4y ago
  Rocky Linux 9
• notesinthefield 4y ago
  Ive spent a lot of time this past year becoming a community mediator and learned the strongest decision a person can make is the one in which they have agency creating. It's guided a lot of my own decisions and helped my relationships quite a lot.
• aaws11 4y ago
  be really good at what you do.
• tomalaci 4y ago
  I used to worry a lot about my future relative to where I currently was. Then I noticed that the grass is always greener on the other side. If you are young and things just aren't working out in your current position - consider moving, whether it is a new position or even a new place, at the very least you will get a new perspective and experience.
• torben-friis 4y ago
  Every time you want to say “x is wrong”, say “I think x has problem y” and either offer a solution for y or ask how it could be solved. Advice at work by a manager. It makes discussions less confrontational, and I found that, regardless of whether it helps the discussion, it helps me keep a positive mood.
  • int0x80 4y ago
    I find this as being indirect and dancing around the issue. When I do e.g. a code review and I see a glaring defect on it - I point it out very clearly and directly to make sure there is no misunderstanding - I say, XYZ is incorrect. Because of blah-blah. No feelings attached to it, just a fact.
    • Cyph0n 4y ago
      That's fine, but only as long as "blah-blah" explains why the code is objectively incorrect. I usually start by writing out the explanation to help with phrasing the review comment.
    • barbarbar 4y ago
      Maybe it would be better if you worked alone then. The advice you are responding to is much better.
    • torben-friis 4y ago
      My point was not really for a mistake caught in code review, more for a “not sure this approach is correct, in a design I’m not sure is a good choice, over legacy whose quality I can’t vouch for, for a feature I’m not sure should be prioritised”. Context: After spending a few years in a well managed unicorn, I joined a small-ish startup that had managed to stay afloat with average engineers operating under constant pressure. After getting decent funding, they decided to hire people to improve quality overall, and that’s when I came in, among others. I have to admit it was hard for me to adapt from “I’m adding features to a well oiled machine” to “everything is full of rust and leaking and I’m supposed to build a product on top it”. That’s why the change of mindset helped: switching the “this is shit” gut reaction into improvement plans helps you focus, prioritise, and avoid assigning blame. It also keeps the former wave of engineers from feeling attacked when they were involved in the original design and hear criticism.
• katzgrau 4y ago
  Be unapologetically authentic. Came from one of my employees. Always struggled with being who I think the world will allow me to be as opposed to the person I am. I flip flop between those two states. That said, I think many of us do. Not to be confused with allowing undesirable behaviors to run free, of course. I'm mindful of being the kind of person I want to be too. Some things just feel easier when you're just being yourself and you choose not to give a shit what others think. It seems more attractive and confident. It can feel scary because you somehow feel like you're putting your life situation or identity at risk. But I guess I've never been good at predicting the future anyway. Might as well be myself.
  • Simon_O_Rourke 4y ago
    > Be unapologetically authentic. That would have me fired within 24 to 48 hours max. I'm a caustic potty-mouthed cynic outside of work, but have to basically hide a good portion of my authentic self in order to continue picking up a paycheck.
    • Gud 4y ago
      Perhaps you are not supposed to be employed? Or perhaps you are not supposed to be potty-mouthed and cynical?
      • Simon_O_Rourke 4y ago
        Supposed to be? I don't get who's supposed to do the supposing?
        • s1artibartfast 4y ago
          I think they were a referring to the potty mouth individual. That is to say, being an employee in a uptight workplace isn't what they're cut out for.
    • alar44 4y ago
      Well then it sounds like you need to work on that. You weren't born a potty mouthed cynic, you choose to be. And if choosing to be that way makes you feel like you can't be yourself, well, you should work on yourself.
• victorbojica 4y ago
  Not really an advice, but this [1] completely changed the way I look and try so solve problems. Basically, most of the things that are put in place have a reason behind it. You don't have to agree with the reason, but you must understand it before trying to solve a problem. [1]: https://fs.blog/chestertons-fence/ https://fs.blog/chestertons-fence/
• kvu207 4y ago
• calltrak 4y ago
• hprotagonist 4y ago
  “Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world's grief. Do good now! Walk justly now! No one is expected to complete the work, but neither may any one desist from it.”
• aaws11 4y ago
  love each other.
• barnacled 4y ago
  That it wasn't completely insane to write a book on the linux memory manager.
  • schappim 4y ago
    Link please!
    • barnacled 4y ago
      Not out for a long while yet, but https://linuxmemory.org/ https://linuxmemory.org/ :)
• sainib 4y ago
  Bear with me. It may sounds little cliche, may be mildly cheesy. I had a self realization and received the advice from myself during one of my "zen state pondering" that - being in the best shape of my health with improve EVERYTHING by 10x in my life. A technologist for 24 years. Almost got my last product startup acquired in 2014 by a (back then) 500 million USD company. I have been obese for 15 years. I have lost 30 pounds in last 4 months and now lifting and working out 4 days a week(I try 5 days). I look forward to working out now. I feel so much more energetic and elevated state of awareness. Everything is already so much better.
  • VeninVidiaVicii 4y ago
    It doesn’t sound as cliche as you think — in my opinion the problem is prioritizing yourself over your productivity. I’m a geneticist with a unique set of analytical skills that keeps me tied up in dozens of projects at a time, and my health is always the thing I let slide. Whenever I finally decide to workout, I tell myself, “I’ll never let that much time go by between workouts again.” Then invariably, I don’t have time. How did you overcome that?
    • quickthrower2 4y ago
      You have a limit of X projects so let it be say 20 instead of 30. Being fit means you will perform better at work on those fewer projects. Drop to 10 and train other people? Other than that, I am trialing pen and paper for todos and exercise plans. I think this helps. Also see an exercise physiologist occasionally and that helps alot. A personal trainer you check in with every 4 weeks is similar. Finally just see it as essential. You will die if you don’t do it kind of thing.
    • vl 4y ago
      Do a small workout every day and do it first thing in the morning. This way you know you have to do it every day and it takes priority above everything else - if you don’t have health, how are you going to do other stuff you want to do?
      • 4y ago
• cperciva 4y ago
  "It gets better. Girls love their daddies eventually." As the father of a 20 month old, this year has been rough; she wants Mommy all the time and now that she's mobile there's not much I can do about it short of physically restraining her. At the end of November she finally decided that I wasn't completely terrible; I went to Vegas for re:Invent and she was going from room to room looking for me. She still wants Mommy more, but Daddy has moved up a step from "unwanted intruder" to "somebody we take for granted but miss when he's gone".
  • dchuk 4y ago
    I only have one child (3.5 years old), but with my own experience as well as what I’ve talked to many people about, Dads basically spend the first 2 years loving their child but primarily supporting Mom, because the kid is so dependent on mom (literally physically for a period of time too). Once you get to 2+ and language starts developing, your bond with the kid will skyrocket. Come up with good ideas for adventures with them and they’ll love you the way you’re hoping they will.
    • logifail 4y ago
      > Dads basically spend the first 2 years loving their child but primarily supporting Mom, because the kid is so dependent on mom (literally physically for a period of time too) FWIW although this might be common, it's not always true. My wife went back to work about four months after our eldest was born (her choice, no pressure from employer), I was working from home - and flexibly - and so I got a lot of quality time with him until he was 18 months and started at daycare. That including us attending the local "mother and baby" group (yes, it was called that) together. After we had two further kids, both of which I also took to "mother and baby" group, they finally renamed the group ;)
      • 1auralynn 4y ago
        Yeah I think it's sometimes just about time spent. I have a 15 month old and my husband and he have always had a strong bond because he's around all the time: He works from home, has more flexible work than me, and I have an office 10 min away that I go to.
• pkoird 4y ago
  A productivity problem is not always psychological, often it's physiological (sleep, inflammation, nutrition) as well. By my PCP. Seriously, go get checked (and presumably treated) for Vit D/B12 deficiency, sleep issues, and inflammations and it might change your life.
• electrondood 4y ago
  You have to go first. If you don't make it happen, it doesn't happen. This is especially true in adults relationships. If you don't put yourself out there and voluntarily assume the risk of going first, risking rejection, etc. then nothing is going to happen. Other people are not going to call you to hang out.
  • thealienthing 4y ago
    This rings true for me. I did my undergraduate in commercial music as a piano player which required me to take 2 years of performance practicum with piano performance majors. They were leagues better than me and I knew it, but we all had to perform many times in front of everyone each semester on very technical baroque, classical and romantic era pieces. Since I knew I was the most out of my depth, I knew I had nothing to lose by performing in front of much more seasoned pianists. The funny thing is how reluctant the performance majors were to go first. So I always volunteered first and often to practice humility, and as a way of breaking the ice. It gave people confidence to go for it if a relative neophyte was performing and doing okay. It was sometimes embarrassing if I performed poorly, but it made a HUGE difference in helping me to learn what I was doing wrong and to get rid of my fear of failure. I learned my craft a LOT quicker during this time. Fail early and often and learn :)
  • SCUSKU 4y ago
    I think you're right about this. Regarding people not calling you to hang out though, I do think once you achieve a certain critical mass of relationship building (usually within a group setting) you will end up getting reciprocal invitations. But like you said, you have to put in the work first before you get to reap those rewards.
    • mach1ne 4y ago
      That's also about how much you give to others. I find that if I am at my 'normal' energy level I receive few reciprocal invitations. But if I deliberately give off 'high-energy' it's like people have found a button which they can press to have fun, and I receive nothing but invitations. The thing is, it's generally not fun for me to be high-energy.
• compacct27 4y ago
  Think by writing. Someone on HN said this and recommended “How to take smart notes”, which I furiously read through and applied to my life. That commenter said it and I’m gonna say it too: I’ve been able to think much more deeply, thoroughly, and most importantly much further along than my old self before doing this (and even further than my coworkers in ways that has already paid off). One day I really went off on it and wrote out my thoughts for 4 hours on some important technical ideas I’ve been ruminating on. Not in one big doc, either, but using Obsidian to connect my ideas to each other. I used those ideas to knock out a massive technical problem we were having at work with half a day’s effort. Found a quick win swimming around in my head. It’s been a game changer. Edit: I found the original comment!! Read it, there’s two other books there that have supercharged my life. Probably the most influential comment I’ve read on HN https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=33594264 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=33594264
  • spai2 4y ago
    Could you provide a link to that post or comment?
    • compacct27 4y ago
      Added it in an edit.
  • mach1ne 4y ago
    How much of that value derived was thanks to Obsidian? I work with pen-and-paper notes, is it worth the shift?
    • compacct27 4y ago
      A lot more than I expected. What I liked is that I could easily connect thoughts written down on separate notes. Lots of “oh hey…I could use this approach I outlined over there”, connecting sometimes 6 separate ideas under a new roof. I was skeptical bc I’m huge on pen and paper, but one morning I just said screw it and put Obsidian on my phone. That alone unleashed a torrent of thought, I think always having something you can take notes on is the key. Paper isn’t always on you when an idea strikes. A phone typically is
• avip 4y ago
  Not sure it's the best advice I got in 2022, but it is my favorite HN comment from 2022! And it's great, period. "There are no tricks, that's just a distraction. Just sit down and do it. Ass in chair gets you there." credit @nso95
  • ChildOfChaos 4y ago
    It's something I have seen from a few sources and it's something I really need to 'learn' in 2023. I tend to overthink a lot, to try and 'figure it out' or to 'make sense of it all', but really I just need to do the things that I already know need to be done, I always know things I need to do, I always have the next step, but because it doesn't quite feel enough or because it's not overly clear to me how the parts fit together or what will happen, I will go back into 'trying to figure it out mode' It's depressing when I stop to think how little time I actually spend doing the things that will actually make the difference and move forward and how much my mind goes in circles trying to figure out how I need to change to make progress, but the truth likely is, I just need to do the thing, do more of it and do it faster, everything else becomes an excuse. In some ways it's an insecurity, because you can't know the future ahead of time and you don't know how what you are doing now will fully link up to what you are hoping to achieve on a bigger scale, but you just have to take that leap.
    • jjice 4y ago
      > I tend to overthink a lot, to try and 'figure it out' or to 'make sense of it all' I think this is super common amongst HN at least. I had to work on it too, but the mindset I fall back on now is that you can start doing it and figure it out along the way. Works for tons of things, from software, to plumbing. Worst case, we can come back later and clean up any mess we made along the way. Best part is, every time you do something new, you get better and the next time is easier. A pet peeve of mine is when people I know say things like "oh I don't know how to do my taxes". Just google it, there are so many great resources and you'll be done in 2 hours. (These are people with 1 state and 1 W-2, nothing complex).
  • disqard 4y ago
    You reminded me of an Alan Kay quote: "Then we had Dan Ingalls whose job was to be smarter than me and make it all really work, and his favorite line was you just do it and it's done... and that's what he did and and so we had it almost right away" ("it" is an early Smalltalk interpreter). Source: https://youtu.be/Odmx-ScL-8o https://youtu.be/Odmx-ScL-8o (51m52s)
• oshirisuki 4y ago
  if you truly want to do something, you do it I don't remember who I heard it from I contrast that with how some people say "I'd like to learn X language" (like Japanese, or Italian, not like Rust) and they don't, some languages are difficult (German comes to mind), but ultimately, if you want to learn a language, you do it
• Ilasky 4y ago
  I actually got mine from "Rocketman" (I watched it a bit late): "You gotta kill the person you were born to be to become the person you want to be." There's a lot wrapped in it: discomfort, uneasiness, and determination. It's made impact from the day-to-day life level (trying new things I wouldn't have before) to the large life-scale (quitting my job to pursue my startup). Ultimately, you just gotta go for it.
  • rg111 4y ago
    Why does this have to be true? My experience with life has been different. I took some elements from the person I was born to be. Only some elements of careful choice. This made me a better person, a better human in the long run. In the short term, it made me fit well, and also reduced unnecessary friction, which non-trivially helped in becoming the person I wanted to be. Killing is kinda like burning bridges.
    • SturgeonsLaw 4y ago
      Depends on where you're at, and where you want to be. I'm also an incrementalist, however there are some people who are stuck in a rut and would benefit from "taking the leap", whatever that leap may be.
  • jstx1 4y ago
    Someone else told me to be myself, now you're telling me to be someone else... this thread is about as helpful as one can expect a general advice thread to be.
    • majewsky 4y ago
      It depends on what your definition of "being yourself" is.
    • mekoka 4y ago
      No conflicts in the advices. Many (most?) people live their life with default settings, simply going along with and never questioning expectations from the world around them (the life they were born to live). They're simply the instrument of a self-fulfilling prophecy. To be who you want to be, you need to be willing to change those default settings, even if that runs counter the predictions.
• noloblo 4y ago
  from a old saying: a bird in hand is worth two in the bush
• RyanShook 4y ago
  “Your mind is prone to misinterpret situations and your thinking does not always reflect reality.” -Rewire Your Anxious Brain https://amzn.to/3B3muZ9 https://amzn.to/3B3muZ9
• quantail 4y ago
  Don't drink alcohol, Don't buy unnecessary things, Get one thing done a day.
• germinalphrase 4y ago
  “You’re unhappy in your career; you need to commit to leaving rather than just talking about it”
• enduser 4y ago
  From The Crown: Does it need to be said? Does it need to be said now? Does it need to be said by me?
  • cafard 4y ago
    It took a while to learn that one.
• theawless 4y ago
  “The difference between try and triumph is just a little umph!” -Ted Jr.
• thn-gap 4y ago
  "Everything has a value". Earlier this year I was drunk at a bar, using the urinal while staring at the wall in front of me, which was full of stickers and scribbles. Then I saw this message, written by who knows who, and it really stuck with me.
  • schappim 4y ago
    Including “Negative value”, something that has a negative or detrimental effect on a situation or outcome.
• greggarious 4y ago
  Someone told me to kill myself, looking back maybe they were throwing me a hint of what's to come :/ (I kid, I kid, but being told to read some stoic philosophy was useful)
• s1artibartfast 4y ago
  “stop worrying and be happy" the advice actually made me quite angry when I received it as I was going through a really rough patch. Just taking a long time to sink in and internalize, but I think it's spot on. Worrying doesn't help the problems or generate Solutions, it only makes it worse. Everything single thing that I thought I needed to worry about can be better achieved without the anguish. You can still think, plan, and act without doing it from a place of fear and without the negative emotional baggage.
  • theGnuMe 4y ago
    Worry is our brain trying to control things that are fundamentally uncontrollable. Take Action is better. So if you’re worried just write them all down. Then you don’t have to worry anymore about it cause you can go back to your notes when necessary.
• p1nkpineapple 4y ago
  "If you keep planning your whole life out like this, you're going to end up miserable". I spontaneously proposed to my girlfriend last night. She said yes :)
  • schappim 4y ago
    Congratulations man!
• nextlevelwizard 4y ago
  Work health care professional hard suggested I go to ER for a thing and I reluctantly went. Shit got way real only couple hours later to a point where I was in so much pain I hardly could walk. Luckily I was already in the ER and got emergency surgery done. Yeah probably not the kind of advice OP was looking for but definitely the best I have gotten for multiple years.
• anyfactor 4y ago
  "Reputation takes a lifetime to build, but only seconds to destroy." - Arnold Rothstein (Boardwalk Empire) I will tell myself that every day. Whether it be family, work or people in general, I have seen how good reputation and goodwill get vanished within just one act of impulsiveness. Doesn't mean I am bad. Even just a harmless tendency such as curiosity, attempting to impress someone or just forcing yourself to fit in, will sometimes cost so much trouble. I have become comfortable of editing and deleting my ideas from the internet, but that doesn't work in real life (or in emails). I remind myself that, I have saved myself from so many problems by restraining myself from acting. Empathy is a good technique to save myself, asking myself, "how my behavior is perceived by others? Have I truly listened before I came to a conclusion? Is compromise an easier solution?" Mediocrity is a survival technique, and it saves you from yourself. It shouldn't be ostracized. People have done more harm by trying to do the right thing they saw fit. Be the person who is generally liked, or in the worst case scenario is forgettable.
  • dctoedt 4y ago
    > Reputation takes a lifetime to build, but only seconds to destroy. There was a saying in the nuclear Navy: Ten thousand attaboys can get wiped out in a heartbeat by one awshit.
• schappim 4y ago
  "use Dalle-2 to create concepts of what you want and then bring those concepts to a designer" this saves so much time and communication overhead in the design process. "I want the design to be similar to this"
• deleted 4y ago
  [deleted]
• mif 4y ago
  „What got you to this level won’t get you to the next.“ To me it basically means that if you want to become a better version of yourself you have to make changes.
• foruhar 4y ago
  Whatever you resist persists. Thinking about not wanting to be overweight makes me feel bad and defeated. Thinking about wanting to get fit gives me a sense of hope, and agency. Put another way thinking about what I don't want begs the question of what do I want and then I can put energy into that. Of course this does not apply to everything e.g. certain chronic diseases.
• Gatsky 4y ago
  “I’ve given a lot of thought to the optimal use of my time, and I simply do best operating by myself.” Just hearing someone extremely successful with effectively limitless resources say this, hearing that this is OK.
• inetsee 4y ago
  This is not something from 2022. I read it decades ago and it has stuck with me all this time. "Wishing without work, is like fishing without bait."
• muertos3 4y ago
  People have two lives. First one starts when you're born. Second one starts when you realize you just have one! If you cannot manage yourself, then how can you manage the world? These two are the best advices I received in 2022. To be honest, I gave them to me after reading something close to them in the same week.
• rffn 4y ago
  “Speak last.” Meaning listening to others more often than telling. In particular when you lead people. Not holding back my opinion but let the others contribute. I particularly like the short, simple, concise statement saying everything.
• Smithy1 4y ago
  I've enjoyed the posts. Excuse the religious slant of this but I think there is a principle here. Buddha taught Buddhism in India and it spread to many other countries, becoming the most popular religion in the world but did not take root in India which is a Hindu country. Christ taught in Israel and Christianity spread around the world but Israel remains Jewish. These teachers were ignored at home. I left Australia aged 32 where my life was bogged down and meaningless and emigrated to the States where I found fulfilment. It wasn't easy, it was illegal for me to earn money but it all worked out. I think there's something about leaving one's home country that invites a brand new path, a fresh opportunity to wipe the old slate and start afresh. I strongly recommend taking the flying leap into the unknown.
  • schappim 4y ago
    How long have you been in the US? What was your path to becoming legal?
• imartin2k 4y ago
  I saw this in a tweet or LinkedIn post (don’t remember anymore exactly) and it stuck with me ever since: “The best way to career success is to be easy to work with”.
• kirso 4y ago
  The secret to life is that there is no real secret. Everything is just about going and doing stuff, experimenting and tinkering with things, choosing one area of focus and then doubling down on what works. This applies to everything. Relationships, health, personal development, business, learning etc.
• ajonit 4y ago
  Listen to both the sides in an argument/fight/confrontation even if version of one side sounds plain obvious. (A timeless advice, not really an advice received in 2022)
• bobbydreamer 4y ago
  Life is short. Don't try to change people. Try understanding them taking a step back, just observing. It's better than a movie.