5 ms·

What's wrong with me that I never used dating apps and never had problems finding people to date through friend of friends or social-oriented clubs(ie intramura

What's wrong with me that I never used dating apps and never had problems finding people to date through friend of friends or social-oriented clubs(ie intramural sports leagues)? Are my standards just too low? Everyone I've dated I've already known on a platonic level - I think it would be really weird to go out on a date where you've basically just looked at their picture.

colechristensen 4y ago
Lots of people just don’t have that kind of friends network.
SpicyLemonZest 4y ago
It’s an attractor some social circles get stuck in. All my friends and all my friends’ friends are on dating apps, and all the new couples I’ve known since college met on dating apps. It is weird, and nobody I’ve talked to likes dating apps, but no one individual can really break the equilibrium.
chrisseaton 4y ago
> through friend of friends or social-oriented clubs Seems likely a limited pool of relatively homogenous people to date in? That's why people use apps - to meet different people outside their friend and hobby groups. And I think a lot of people very specifically don't want to date in friend and hobby groups, to avoid mess.
hnhorrorshow 4y ago
I mean, you're probably not freakishly ugly and cringe-inducing like most of the crazies on HN. Oddly enough, it's not my sharp mind, good looks or impeccable charm that keeps the ladies interested IRL. It's my reputation for being utterly despised by dang.
- trashface 4y ago
  Wait so if I put "Despised by dang" on my profile I might get more matches? I have to try that.
ReactiveJelly 4y ago
Dating apps are supposed to work for people like me who don't belong to sports leagues, or have any outside-the-house hobbies, or really have strong platonic friendships. [1] They don't work, but they're sold with such a premise. [1] My last really good platonic friendship is now my spouse of a few years.
- lupire 4y ago
  "Dating apps are for people who are terrible at dating, and they don't help" is classic "identify a problem and sell a fake solution" advertising-driven -sales business. (See also: politicians)

colechristensen 4y ago

Lots of people just don’t have that kind of friends network.

SpicyLemonZest 4y ago

It’s an attractor some social circles get stuck in. All my friends and all my friends’ friends are on dating apps, and all the new couples I’ve known since college met on dating apps. It is weird, and nobody I’ve talked to likes dating apps, but no one individual can really break the equilibrium.

chrisseaton 4y ago

> through friend of friends or social-oriented clubs Seems likely a limited pool of relatively homogenous people to date in? That's why people use apps - to meet different people outside their friend and hobby groups. And I think a lot of people very specifically don't want to date in friend and hobby groups, to avoid mess.

hnhorrorshow 4y ago

I mean, you're probably not freakishly ugly and cringe-inducing like most of the crazies on HN. Oddly enough, it's not my sharp mind, good looks or impeccable charm that keeps the ladies interested IRL. It's my reputation for being utterly despised by dang.

trashface 4y ago
Wait so if I put "Despised by dang" on my profile I might get more matches? I have to try that.

ReactiveJelly 4y ago

Dating apps are supposed to work for people like me who don't belong to sports leagues, or have any outside-the-house hobbies, or really have strong platonic friendships. [1] They don't work, but they're sold with such a premise. [1] My last really good platonic friendship is now my spouse of a few years.

lupire 4y ago
"Dating apps are for people who are terrible at dating, and they don't help" is classic "identify a problem and sell a fake solution" advertising-driven -sales business. (See also: politicians)