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I'm really reluctant to talk to strangers, but when I do... I use triangulation, where you don't talk about yourself (a stranger doesn't care) and you don't tal
by unzadunza 4y ago
I'm really reluctant to talk to strangers, but when I do... I use triangulation, where you don't talk about yourself (a stranger doesn't care) and you don't talk about them (it makes them uncomfortable), but instead you talk about a 3rd subject that maybe is visible to both of you, like the pretty fall leaves.
Actually, last year, right after I learned about triangulation, I was walking my dogs and stranger mentioned the pretty fall leaves to me. I then started telling him that he was using triangulation and explained what it is. He got uncomfortable and walked away. Derp.
- darkerside 4y agoThis is called small talk, and despite being reviled by many needs, it serves an important social purpose of making people feel comfortable before we talk about things that can get uncomfortable (like each other). Most people agree that it's silly but needed, which is why when you deconstruct with a random stranger (thereby making it about the two of you and NOT a separate thing), they will feel the need to quickly exit your presence.
- amelius 4y agoTaking a conversation meta will make a lot of people uncomfortable, yes.
- moffkalast 4y agoJust don't ask about the weather https://xkcd.com/1324/ https://xkcd.com/1324/