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I'm sorry for the pain it will cause you. I had a similar story with my own accounts. It's just lost forever, luckily I had many others, and didn't associate

I'm sorry for the pain it will cause you. I had a similar story with my own accounts. It's just lost forever, luckily I had many others, and didn't associate my whole life to any single account or provider, nor used social sign in, so it was not life altering, just a bit of work. But selfishly, I hope those kind of story get published more and more so that people finally realized that what we told them not to do the for the last 20 years was not just for the sake of it. People don't listen to preventive talks. We see that with cyber security, climate change, and so on. They only start to move when they get hurt. I wished people would have listened to us when we advised not to give everything to GAFAM, not to put everything online, and not everything on one provider. And certainly not to trust them with being on your side. So they wouldn't have to get hurt. But this is not how we, as a specie, learn. We need to get hurt. So make sure a lot of people know about this. Not just in the hope to get the account back, but because maybe more people will listen this time.

TedDoesntTalk 4y ago
Here’s why I down voted you, even though you’re right. “I told you so” is never helpful when someone is in pain. It actually exacerbates their pain.
- MichaelZuo 4y ago
  Wasn't that their point though? That most folks only really learn through sufficient pain?
  - TedDoesntTalk 4y ago
    Yes. That comment is unhelpful and only exacerbates the pain.
    - MichaelZuo 4y ago
      I don't want to nitpick but if they believe that most people only really learn through pain then they would likely also believe exacerbating pain is indeed helping.
bmitc 4y ago
What is the alternative? For Gmail, I take the precautions of configuring mobile phone, authenticator app, backup email address, and printed out codes. What else can I do? Is it really better to use several different email addresses? For Facebook, I’m currently completely locked out. I have the right username and password, but the email accounts I used to create the Facebook account are disabled now, being university accounts. At one point, Facebook wanted my credit card or driver’s license as proof to tenable the account, which I wasn’t comfortable with. Then it got paired down to three randomly chosen connections that I needed to contact outside of Facebook. Once chosen by Facebook, these contacts cannot be changed. For me, it included a deceased person and two people I haven't even seen since high school. Now, it just wants to validate the email addresses with no other options. So now what? Nothing in my control ever went wrong. I know my account, I am the person, and I have the username and password. It would be nice to be able to just call a number with a human on the other line to verify that it is me. We've entered the era of "death by scale". We and the government allow these companies to treat customers and people as statistical entities. They don't give a shit if their products either flat out don't work or ruin a customer's life for "only" x percent if x is small enough.
- zelphirkalt 4y ago
  What you can do is to not use providers like Google or Facebook for you e-mail or identity. Pay for a good e-mail service with human beings in charge and use a safe password, probably a password manager that generates it.
  - bmitc 4y ago
    Do you or others have suggestions for email providers? I have been considering using Fastmail. Do people use custom domain names to get around the fact of switching email providers? Aren’t there rejection/filter issues when using custom domain names?
    - zelphirkalt 4y ago
      I like posteo.
wruza 4y ago
nor used social sign in, so it was not life altering, just a bit of work For most users, it’s not a bit of work, but a life changer (as in this case, right). Most sites only allow G and f SSI, and that’s it. Quick registration is a killer feature and it’s a shame that it is not a part of the tech stack at much lower level than google/site integration. It’s almost 20 years of mass-internet and it still sucks at account registration.

TedDoesntTalk 4y ago

Here’s why I down voted you, even though you’re right. “I told you so” is never helpful when someone is in pain. It actually exacerbates their pain.

MichaelZuo 4y ago
Wasn't that their point though? That most folks only really learn through sufficient pain?
- TedDoesntTalk 4y ago
  Yes. That comment is unhelpful and only exacerbates the pain.
  - MichaelZuo 4y ago
    I don't want to nitpick but if they believe that most people only really learn through pain then they would likely also believe exacerbating pain is indeed helping.

bmitc 4y ago

What is the alternative? For Gmail, I take the precautions of configuring mobile phone, authenticator app, backup email address, and printed out codes. What else can I do? Is it really better to use several different email addresses? For Facebook, I’m currently completely locked out. I have the right username and password, but the email accounts I used to create the Facebook account are disabled now, being university accounts. At one point, Facebook wanted my credit card or driver’s license as proof to tenable the account, which I wasn’t comfortable with. Then it got paired down to three randomly chosen connections that I needed to contact outside of Facebook. Once chosen by Facebook, these contacts cannot be changed. For me, it included a deceased person and two people I haven't even seen since high school. Now, it just wants to validate the email addresses with no other options. So now what? Nothing in my control ever went wrong. I know my account, I am the person, and I have the username and password. It would be nice to be able to just call a number with a human on the other line to verify that it is me. We've entered the era of "death by scale". We and the government allow these companies to treat customers and people as statistical entities. They don't give a shit if their products either flat out don't work or ruin a customer's life for "only" x percent if x is small enough.

zelphirkalt 4y ago
What you can do is to not use providers like Google or Facebook for you e-mail or identity. Pay for a good e-mail service with human beings in charge and use a safe password, probably a password manager that generates it.
- bmitc 4y ago
  Do you or others have suggestions for email providers? I have been considering using Fastmail. Do people use custom domain names to get around the fact of switching email providers? Aren’t there rejection/filter issues when using custom domain names?
  - zelphirkalt 4y ago
    I like posteo.

wruza 4y ago

nor used social sign in, so it was not life altering, just a bit of work For most users, it’s not a bit of work, but a life changer (as in this case, right). Most sites only allow G and f SSI, and that’s it. Quick registration is a killer feature and it’s a shame that it is not a part of the tech stack at much lower level than google/site integration. It’s almost 20 years of mass-internet and it still sucks at account registration.