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My last job search took a toll on my mental health. I felt like a worthless person for 3 months. I could feel (or imagine?) the disdain of the interviewers as I

My last job search took a toll on my mental health. I felt like a worthless person for 3 months. I could feel (or imagine?) the disdain of the interviewers as I was failing their tests. The fake enthusiasm on their side as they rejected me ("that was great! But we're not going to move forward with you! Good luck!!!") and on my side while pretending I was excited when in fact I was worried about money and the gap on my resume. I dread the next one.

Shocka1 4y ago
I had the same experience. I've bombed a lot of CS interviews - a lot more than I've done well on, hah! I'm a couple classes away from a Master's in CS and would still have to study my butt off to be successful in a whiteboard interview. The first few rejections hurt a little, but once I started taking the interviews for what they were it all became a big joke to me. And the recruiter process may be even worse than the interviews. At this point I'm of the opinion that I'm not gonna waste one more minute on Leetcode or any "kata" a recruiter sends me. I've got much better things to do with my time. My current position was basically just a conversation for an hour. Best interview ever... Went in thinking I was gonna have to do the whiteboard thing and they never asked me one question about any kind of algorithm. Been on the team several years now and it's the best position I've ever had. I'd probably need something like a 50 to 75% salary bump to consider leaving, and I would flat out refuse any whiteboard interviews. I always count myself blessed that I'm in the position where I can be selective. If I was desperate, I'd have to compete for them like everyone else.
vorpalhex 4y ago
Interviewing is a skill. Practice it. Learn the stupid code challenges. Learn the corpo talk.
CoastalCoder 4y ago
You might be comforted to know that I was once in a similar situation, but I eventually found a great job and things worked out. The lesson I learned is that you shouldn't draw too many conclusions from just a few bad interviews.
cloverich 4y ago
This was my exact experience. But I scheduled so many interviews I didn't have time to dwell. Which is great, because I am good at dwelling. I bombed many interviews in an embarrassing fashion. After about 10 or so, I started to improve. And as the questions on each successive interview began to rhyme with previous ones, I got faster and better. You know your comfort zone best, but just as a data point, consider whether scheduling interviews like its your job (or your second job) would help. And again just anecdote, but I think if I'd interviews with less than 10 companies, I probably would have convinced myself I was stupid. Instead I went from 10+ straight rejections to multiple offers and a sizable salary bump.
- politician 4y ago
  The tragic part of the inane way that we interview candidates is that if the new job works out, interview hacking skills begin to decay immediately. After a few years, interview skills for the next job search will begin in roughly the same place.
- hisnameisjimmy 4y ago
  I did this same thing at one point. > But I scheduled so many interviews I didn't have time to dwell If you are sensitive to failure, a trick to overcoming it is to overwhelm your ability to dwell through sheer volume of experiences. Usually the anticipation of the next experience makes dwelling on the last one difficult to impossible. This works for dating, interviewing, presenting, and probably myriad other things that I haven't had to get better at. Does this make it so your body thrums with cortisol nearly 24/7? Yes! But do you improve quickly? Also yes! How long do you want to spend getting better? There's both a time cost and emotional cost to improving slowly. Conversely, improving quickly is exciting and motivating. I went through period where I was not only bad at interviewing, but so nervous that I couldn't control my palms sweating so profusely that it was embarrassing to shake hands with my interviewer (and probably gross for them!). Once I realized I had to go for volume to get over my nerves, things changed dramatically for the better. Try it!
hammyhavoc 4y ago
Who watches the watchmen? Who hires the people who hire people?
- dleslie 4y ago
  Ha, as though those testing for merit and value are themselves tested for the ability to do so. ;)
- HomeDeLaPot 4y ago
  Each employee, when interviewing candidates, is required to make the interview harder than their own was. In this way we incrementally improve talent velocity. We call it Agile Interviewing.
pkrotich 4y ago
I feel your pain! I had an initial phone interview with Yahoo in mid 2000 or so and my anxiety got the best of me on "hello". I went blank! Forgot how to talk - so I hanged up and DECIDED that very minute that I would start my own company and never interview again!
- 2muchcoffeeman 4y ago
  I once blanked in the middle of n interview because in the back of my mind I was thinking “do I really want to work for these guys?” And my brain started to wonder.
- anchochilis 4y ago
  So did you end up founding your own company? Was that your last interview ever? Don't leave us hanging!
  - peteradio 4y ago
    Your question frightened them, they've deleted their account.
    - pkrotich 4y ago
      Huh… this is obviously fake news!
      - baobabKoodaa 4y ago
        It's a little bit funny, though.
  - pkrotich 4y ago
    Yes, never took another full time job again. I interviewed for contract work thereafter but nothing like formal interview. I launched a popular open source software that turned into a company.
eastbound 4y ago
I’ve just hired a wrong person. I’m extremely worried how I should manage an exit plan with her, I don’t see a good way of minimizing the impact. Some employers are stupid and make bad decisions because they’re too shy to ask for a third round of interview when we assume everyone at that level will know the standard set of JS skills, especially since the market is difficult for employers. While it’s painful to give them the time to evaluate you properly, it may also save you from a bad employer.
- philliphaydon 4y ago
  This is why propbation periods exist. It’s a chance for the employee or employer to back out.
  - rnk 4y ago
    Probationary periods are good for companies, but they're horrible for early stage engineers. They don't know how to take it, and they probably don't have a lot of money saved up. I think if companies decide to fire someone after a probationary period they should give them a $1,000 bonus or something to carry them over. That engineer has given up other opportunities and maybe moved or made changes in their life. Not everyone is a reasonably well off software engineer with money in the bank.
    - snovv_crash 4y ago
      Probation periods are also good for employees. If you arrive at a company and the new boss screams at you to work harder you can leave without having to stay for the full notice period.
      - rnk 4y ago
        I can quit any job any time I want in the us, perhaps unless I've signed an unusual contract. Never seen that in software but I'm also not a contractor but a full time employee only. So what's the benefit to the employee to be on probation?
Consultant32452 4y ago
Back when I was a regular employee I would take 2-3 interviews every 6 months. I found many benefits to doing this: interviewing skills, salaries in my market, skills people are hiring for. I definitely recommend it to anyone, especially if you are the type of person who is anxious about interviews.
OrangeMonkey 4y ago
This entire industry is a joke with its interviews. Its not a reflection on you.
rnk 4y ago
If you have a gap just say you took time off between jobs. Are you exploring startup ideas but decided to go back to a company. Have a few startup ideas in your back pocket just in case.

Shocka1 4y ago

I had the same experience. I've bombed a lot of CS interviews - a lot more than I've done well on, hah! I'm a couple classes away from a Master's in CS and would still have to study my butt off to be successful in a whiteboard interview. The first few rejections hurt a little, but once I started taking the interviews for what they were it all became a big joke to me. And the recruiter process may be even worse than the interviews. At this point I'm of the opinion that I'm not gonna waste one more minute on Leetcode or any "kata" a recruiter sends me. I've got much better things to do with my time. My current position was basically just a conversation for an hour. Best interview ever... Went in thinking I was gonna have to do the whiteboard thing and they never asked me one question about any kind of algorithm. Been on the team several years now and it's the best position I've ever had. I'd probably need something like a 50 to 75% salary bump to consider leaving, and I would flat out refuse any whiteboard interviews. I always count myself blessed that I'm in the position where I can be selective. If I was desperate, I'd have to compete for them like everyone else.

vorpalhex 4y ago

Interviewing is a skill. Practice it. Learn the stupid code challenges. Learn the corpo talk.

CoastalCoder 4y ago

You might be comforted to know that I was once in a similar situation, but I eventually found a great job and things worked out. The lesson I learned is that you shouldn't draw too many conclusions from just a few bad interviews.

cloverich 4y ago

This was my exact experience. But I scheduled so many interviews I didn't have time to dwell. Which is great, because I am good at dwelling. I bombed many interviews in an embarrassing fashion. After about 10 or so, I started to improve. And as the questions on each successive interview began to rhyme with previous ones, I got faster and better. You know your comfort zone best, but just as a data point, consider whether scheduling interviews like its your job (or your second job) would help. And again just anecdote, but I think if I'd interviews with less than 10 companies, I probably would have convinced myself I was stupid. Instead I went from 10+ straight rejections to multiple offers and a sizable salary bump.

politician 4y ago
The tragic part of the inane way that we interview candidates is that if the new job works out, interview hacking skills begin to decay immediately. After a few years, interview skills for the next job search will begin in roughly the same place.
hisnameisjimmy 4y ago
I did this same thing at one point. > But I scheduled so many interviews I didn't have time to dwell If you are sensitive to failure, a trick to overcoming it is to overwhelm your ability to dwell through sheer volume of experiences. Usually the anticipation of the next experience makes dwelling on the last one difficult to impossible. This works for dating, interviewing, presenting, and probably myriad other things that I haven't had to get better at. Does this make it so your body thrums with cortisol nearly 24/7? Yes! But do you improve quickly? Also yes! How long do you want to spend getting better? There's both a time cost and emotional cost to improving slowly. Conversely, improving quickly is exciting and motivating. I went through period where I was not only bad at interviewing, but so nervous that I couldn't control my palms sweating so profusely that it was embarrassing to shake hands with my interviewer (and probably gross for them!). Once I realized I had to go for volume to get over my nerves, things changed dramatically for the better. Try it!

hammyhavoc 4y ago

Who watches the watchmen? Who hires the people who hire people?

dleslie 4y ago
Ha, as though those testing for merit and value are themselves tested for the ability to do so. ;)
HomeDeLaPot 4y ago
Each employee, when interviewing candidates, is required to make the interview harder than their own was. In this way we incrementally improve talent velocity. We call it Agile Interviewing.

pkrotich 4y ago

I feel your pain! I had an initial phone interview with Yahoo in mid 2000 or so and my anxiety got the best of me on "hello". I went blank! Forgot how to talk - so I hanged up and DECIDED that very minute that I would start my own company and never interview again!

2muchcoffeeman 4y ago
I once blanked in the middle of n interview because in the back of my mind I was thinking “do I really want to work for these guys?” And my brain started to wonder.
anchochilis 4y ago
So did you end up founding your own company? Was that your last interview ever? Don't leave us hanging!
- peteradio 4y ago
  Your question frightened them, they've deleted their account.
  - pkrotich 4y ago
    Huh… this is obviously fake news!
    - baobabKoodaa 4y ago
      It's a little bit funny, though.
- pkrotich 4y ago
  Yes, never took another full time job again. I interviewed for contract work thereafter but nothing like formal interview. I launched a popular open source software that turned into a company.

eastbound 4y ago

I’ve just hired a wrong person. I’m extremely worried how I should manage an exit plan with her, I don’t see a good way of minimizing the impact. Some employers are stupid and make bad decisions because they’re too shy to ask for a third round of interview when we assume everyone at that level will know the standard set of JS skills, especially since the market is difficult for employers. While it’s painful to give them the time to evaluate you properly, it may also save you from a bad employer.

philliphaydon 4y ago
This is why propbation periods exist. It’s a chance for the employee or employer to back out.
- rnk 4y ago
  Probationary periods are good for companies, but they're horrible for early stage engineers. They don't know how to take it, and they probably don't have a lot of money saved up. I think if companies decide to fire someone after a probationary period they should give them a $1,000 bonus or something to carry them over. That engineer has given up other opportunities and maybe moved or made changes in their life. Not everyone is a reasonably well off software engineer with money in the bank.
  - snovv_crash 4y ago
    Probation periods are also good for employees. If you arrive at a company and the new boss screams at you to work harder you can leave without having to stay for the full notice period.
    - rnk 4y ago
      I can quit any job any time I want in the us, perhaps unless I've signed an unusual contract. Never seen that in software but I'm also not a contractor but a full time employee only. So what's the benefit to the employee to be on probation?

Consultant32452 4y ago

Back when I was a regular employee I would take 2-3 interviews every 6 months. I found many benefits to doing this: interviewing skills, salaries in my market, skills people are hiring for. I definitely recommend it to anyone, especially if you are the type of person who is anxious about interviews.

OrangeMonkey 4y ago

This entire industry is a joke with its interviews. Its not a reflection on you.

rnk 4y ago

If you have a gap just say you took time off between jobs. Are you exploring startup ideas but decided to go back to a company. Have a few startup ideas in your back pocket just in case.