3 ms·
The shamelessness of asking whatever you need or need to know, is quite powerful. I have a friend, that has the strategy to always ask for help. Whatever he nee
by andix 4y ago
The shamelessness of asking whatever you need or need to know, is quite powerful. I have a friend, that has the strategy to always ask for help. Whatever he needs to do, he just asks friends, coworkers, strangers, and whoever is around for help.
Of course he is blown off most of the time, and that’s fine for him, he doesn’t hold any grudges if you refuse to help him. He just keeps asking, until he finds someone.
I don’t want to be a leach like him, who just lives on other peoples good faith. But it’s really impressive how well this strategy works. And what kind of things he got out of it already.
- amelius 4y agoI think it is because asking people for help is giving those people meaning.
- tartoran 4y agoThe meaning is to build a trusty connection and normally it would be a great benefit for both parties. But the shameless breaks the ballance, takes advantage and wins in the short term and in their minds of course. But I am not sure they’d fare well in the long run.
- SilverBirch 4y agoThat strategy works well up to a point, but the big limitation on that is in iterative scenarios. If you come across a stranger and ask them for help, they'll probably help, at worst they don't. If you continually ask for help as your first move at work you'll quickly develop a reputation, people will start avoiding you, offering help less, refusing help when you actually need it, and give bad feedback about you when it comes to promotions/salary discussions.
- andix 4y agoSure. But it still gives more impressive results as you would think. If you’re smart, you use this strategy much more rarely, and just in the cases it’s really needed. But a lot of people forget to use the „please help me card“ in those situations, because they feel ashamed.
- ls15 4y ago> Whatever he needs to do, he just asks friends, coworkers They say "Asking doesn't cost us anything.", but if I recognize a pattern of repeatedly asking for help without offering something in return (emergencies excluded), it may cost them my sympathy.
- andix 4y agoSure, but the risk of losing sympathy is not as big as many people expect it to be. And maybe much less relevant.
- tartoran 4y agoAbsolutely. Shameless friends asking for help repeatedly with nothing in return become irritating and perhaps avoided after some time. Contrast that with someone who is shameful and know they can’t return the favor and don’t abuse their position because they’re ashamed to.
- blitzar 4y agoI have seen this pattern before. It works, especially when it works. Leech off someone, have a small degree of success. Future victims of ones leeching are then drawn in because this person is a winner. Repeat and rinse.