13 ms·

Show HN: I help LGBT people to find LGBT homes

113 points by adrien248 4y ago

My Gay Flatmate helps the LGBT community to find a safe place to live. It is a 2-sided platform. People can advirtise their spare room, and they can also create a profile to say they are looking for a room. Happy to receive some feedback! I am a solo founder (not by option)

hirundo 4y ago
It would be a social good to do the inverse, to help the identities integrate instead of segregate. By living together we can more easily discover that our gender and sexuality define us less than our common humanity. As with our ethnicity and religion. It's easier to see this if you s/LGBT/<other>/.
- Kye 4y ago
  You work on that. OP can keep working on triaging the crisis of homeless LGBT people.
- Elinvynia 4y ago
  As long as arguments like the "trans panic" defense exist and are viable in courts, I feel like it's better for queer people to stick together. Your idea while honorable ignores the reality that queer people experience and that one of the two parties in the US is planning to strip away more of their rights. (See: Recent RvW ruling that had their next targets set, like same sex marriage)
- AlecSchueler 4y ago
  This really ignores that many LGBTQIA+ people face serious housing discrimination as well as increased risk from certain kinds of aggressive behaviour. That's not to mention the benefits of having people around who understand the various social, familial and professional struggles they might face, often empathizing through first hand experience. I know many queer people who prefer to live in queer friendly houses and every city I've lived in has had ad-hoc Facebook groups catering to this need.
  - president 4y ago
    > This really ignores that many LGBTQIA+ people face serious housing discrimination as well as increased risk from certain kinds of aggressive behaviour. This is a really interesting statement. How would someone discriminate against someone who is LGBTQIA+ without knowing that they were or not? LGBTQIA+ is not something that can be recognized right away like skin color.
    - carbadtraingood 4y ago
      "My same sex partner and I are looking for a place to rent". "My legal ID says James, but please use Joanna". "Oh this Pride t-shirt? Yeah, last year's was a blast, thanks for noticing!" To say nothing about things like "passing" in the trans community, or stereotypes about gay men and lesbian women.
    - _gd3l 4y ago
      [dead]
    - showerst 4y ago
      I know it’s not an ideal source, but search Reddit’s legal advice subreddit sometime. There’s constant posts of people getting eviction notices because their conservative landlord saw them bring home a partner they didn’t approve of.
    - uoaei 4y ago
    - rsynnott 4y ago
      If you're _living_ with someone they're likely to figure it out. This is for helping people find flatmates. Even for non-flatmate scenarios, some landlords are remarkably nosy. Also, in many jurisdictions trans people may have legal docs in a name they don't use anymore... the list goes on. It's also reasonably common for people to be discriminated against because people _incorrectly think that they are LGBT_, incidentally.
    - taurath 4y ago
- carbadtraingood 4y ago
  I don't think you understand just how alienated and dangerous it is to be queer in America. There's a crisis in LGBTQ+ housing. Putting queer folks in with cishet folks puts the burden of educating those cishet folks on the shoulders of someone who is already struggling to find housing. Someone experiencing housing struggles because they are queer doesn't need the added burden of being someone's teacher. Those people who need to learn the lesson that humanity is what's important? They need to learn that without relying on minorities to teach them.
  - homonculus1 4y ago
    - jjj123 4y ago
      Does this mean you’re surprised there are queer people on hn? Or that queer people are willing to talk about “queer stuff” on hn? Edited for clarity
      - homonculus1 4y ago
        AlecSchueler 4y ago
        Couple of things to say to this. First up, this is a technical solution to problem so it seems to fit with what you miss on the first place. But secondly, in the 10+ years I've been coming to this site almost daily it has never been "highly focused" in the way you describe -- it's always been about anything that piques one's intellectual curiosity. But beyond that, being LGBTQIA+ is not a niche thing. Every workplace, classroom, and social circle I've ever been in has had LGBT members. Moreover it's not a "sexual lifestyle" it's simply a part of someone's existence. Your comment is actually bordering on homophobia and that's something I personally hadn't expected to see on HN.
        4y ago
- pavon 4y ago
  It is good for people to have experiences outside of their comfort zone, and to interact with others with different beliefs than their own. It is also important for people to have places and social support structures where they feel safe. A person's home should really be part of their safe space, not the stretching space.
- alxjrvs 4y ago
  That would be good. You know how we get to that universe? Having more queer people around. You know how we do that?
- causi 4y ago
  Social goods are often the inverse of individual goods. I'm not going to make anyone an involuntary advocate.
- taurath 4y ago
  Physical and psychological safety is a far more primary concern when it comes to a living space for someone. One’s home is, for more people, a place to relax not a place to challenge social dynamics. LGBT people regularly move across the country to find safer spaces for them to be themselves, because there isn’t much in terms of safety or community for them where they grow up.
Elinvynia 4y ago
Thank you for doing this! Getting kicked out/disowned is an unfortunately common experience for the queer youth and providing them with easy to find safe spaces is a very kind thing to do.
- adrien248 4y ago
  We appreciate your words! Sending love <3
- Mo3 4y ago
  Wtf? Landlords are kicking out queer people for being queer? I can’t imagine any possible and reasonable explanation for them to do that. In any case, nice project
  - Kye 4y ago
    Queerphobia It's not a good reason but it's common enough and the targets aren't typically in a strong position to fight it. Some homeless shelters will even kick queer people out if they get in. Look up the controversy around the Salvation Army.
    - Mo3 4y ago
      Not questioning this happening, at all, but it's so unbelievably idiotic to me. It's not like queer people pay less rent or are by default bad tenants.
      - deleted 4y ago
        [deleted]
      - themacguffinman 4y ago
        It only seems idiotic because you're not really seeing it as a deeply moral issue from their point of view. I don't agree, but to them it's similar to allowing a sex offender or a pedophile as a tenant (and conflating LGBT people with pedophiles is a time-honored tradition). Even if there's zero chance that they'll do anything to anyone, it still invokes a moral revulsion. Landlords are emotional humans like everyone else, they aren't motivated solely by rent payments.
Vosporos 4y ago
Godspeed
tjpnz 4y ago
Do those listing have the ability to control the size of the map pindrop or disable it entirely? Displaying such an accurate location might make some uncomfortable.
- deleted 4y ago
  [deleted]
carbadtraingood 4y ago
Love it! Gay might not be the most inclusive label if you are aiming for LGBT folks (I'm queer but not gay), but hey, better to have this than not have this by a long ways!
- Kye 4y ago
  My guess is gay is less likely to get it nailed by filters.
  - carbadtraingood 4y ago
    Possibly. It's not uncommon for folks to use gay to mean queer/LGBTQ and unintentionally exclude folks. It's a holdover from earlier gay rights and gay liberation movements. The history there is complicated. You also see folks specifically omit the T these days (LBG) to specifically include trans folks. To be clear, the OP sounds like they are a good person and I'm not accusing them of anything negative! Just noting that some folks might interpret the URL differently than intended.
    - alisonatwork 4y ago
      Personally I am not the "G" in LGBTQ+ but I prefer to be described as gay than queer, because in many parts of the world where I lived or visited, queer is still a slur and carries a lot of emotional baggage with it. I don't think it's problematic for a modern website to choose to use gay as the catch-all. Really how people choose to be referred to is just a matter of personal preference, it's not nearly as important as actions or intent. If the site is legit, people will appreciate it all the same.
      - carbadtraingood 4y ago
        Yep. Language is hard. Queer is absolutely a reclaimed slur, and comes with all that baggage, making it either political, fine, or too heavy depending on where you live. In general, I don't mind queer folks calling me queer, but I really bristle when I hear cishet folks use it.
nathanaldensr 4y ago
Is this legal in the United States? If these listings constitute "housing" then you may fall afoul of HUD regulations[1] regarding discriminating against anyone regardless of sexual orientation. i.e., if I am straight you may not be able to prevent me from using your platform to acquire housing. I'm curious to know what advice you've gotten from your lawyer on this. [1] https://www.hud.gov/program_offices/fair_housing_equal_opp/housing_discrimination_and_persons_identifying_lgbtq https://www.hud.gov/program_offices/fair_housing_equal_opp/h... > The Fair Housing Act prohibits housing and housing-related discrimination because of race, color, national origin, religion, sex (including gender identity and sexual orientation), familial status, and disability.
- Pfhortune 4y ago
  They aren't providing housing, merely connecting people to find common housing. By your logic, craigslist would have been crushed ages ago.
  - nathanaldensr 4y ago
    I didn't provide logic; I only asked a question. The legal system tends not to be that cut-and-dry. I don't know the answer as I am not a lawyer.
  - dehrmann 4y ago
    Craigslist gets some protections from Section 230. Meta, on the other hand, recently settled a suit that its ad targeting allows advertisers to discriminate[1] (full disclosure, I work for Meta, but my views are my own). Because this website is a tool with the specific purpose of discriminatory housing (vs Meta's general-purpose ad targeting), I'd be very careful. 1. https://www.engadget.com/meta-housing-discrimination-settlement-191710885.html https://www.engadget.com/meta-housing-discrimination-settlem...
    - klyrs 4y ago
      First off, much of the conversation is about the US, and the site appears to only support listings in the UK. > Find your next LGBT+ friendly household I don't see this as discriminatory. Likewise, if somebody made a site for wheelchair-accessible apartments, that wouldn't be discriminatory either.
chroem- 4y ago
- carbadtraingood 4y ago
  LGBT housing is safe for LGBT folks, particularly because it is either shared by or run by queer folks who are much less likely to discriminate or do violence against you because you are queer. Regular housing offers no such guarantees. Maybe it's fine, maybe it's dangerous.
  - koreanguy 4y ago
3qz 4y ago
There’s no way to run a service like this without it turning into a hookup site. I would never trust a room here. Too many predators.
- uoaei 4y ago
  This is an interesting point. The system would likely require some kind of reputation score like ratings on other rental sites.
- cp9 4y ago
  in the same vein as craigslist will this site likely be used for sex work? probably does that matter? not to me. sex work is work and sex workers usually make it clear as to what their listing is about (otherwise they won't get work).
  - BlargMcLarg 4y ago
    It's obviously not about sex work, but about preying on the vulnerable. Your opinion aside, quite a few countries and cultures look down on predators and trading sex for a place to live.
- nathanaldensr 4y ago
  Honestly, the logo including a running shower gives that impression.
- adrien248 4y ago
  Hi there :) Thank you for your feedback! :) I'm not sure where are you from. But in London we have the "Flatshare" culture. Sometimes people move to a room without having a clue of who will be their flatmates (and it happen to me in my first home)... We recomemend our users to meet their flatmates before having a tenancy. But this should be applied for anyone, not exclusively LGBT+ people. :) Regarding "hookup site", we believe there's other apps better developed for that purpose. But actually, on Grindr (most used gay dating app) you can find enumerous profiles saying "Looking for room" or "Room available".
- matthewmacleod 4y ago
koreanguy 4y ago
upupandup 4y ago
In the anecdotes provided by my peers, LGBTQ friendly or LGBTQ only type of housing is rife for violence and bullying. You'd think that naturally people who are pushed to the fringes would be kind to each other, and it just isn't the case. There's just magnified amount of animosity that can quickly grow especially. So while I applaud the good intention, the actual reality is pretty grim, the ideal solution would be to let LGBTQ people live like any other people. However, we decided to label and group and trying to get them to create their own bubbles and I feel like this is not diversity but systematic exclusion. Pretty soon we will see LGBTQ ghettos and the same level of exploitation that comes when you concentrate people with all sorts of personal boundaries/expectations that are not aligned. The idea that LGBTQ are somehow all united and see themselves on a flat hierarchy is misplaced and its a recipe for disaster. It should be like in Japan, where the mainstream isn't really forced to adopt any particular views or forced to hire people from said groups but still get along respectably and more importantly, people simply do not put so much emphasis on sexuality like in Judeo-Christian societies. Lastly, LGBTQ in Japan does not wonder about getting killed by some flag bearing closeted and insecure, violent and poor groups. Kindergartens in Japan aren't having mass shooter drills or building bulletproof panic lockers. Neither country is better than the other, each has its own ups and downs but In Japan you can have gay/trans walk around and they aren't worried for their safety or facing violence from strangers. In West you can have gay/trans marriages and rights but they are walking around fearing for violence from strangers even in "liberal progressive" hoods. Japan is also in process of introducing gay marriages, trans rights, albeit slow.
- carbadtraingood 4y ago
  Japan doesn't allow gay marriage, iirc?
  - kayodelycaon 4y ago
    Correct: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Recognition_of_same-sex_unions_in_Japan https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Recognition_of_same-sex_unions...
  - david_allison 4y ago
dehrmann 4y ago
Someone already called out HUD. The other thing to be very careful with is PII because what you have could be incredibly sensitive. I wouldn't be so worried on the legal front, but more a personal front that I wouldn't sleep well at night knowing lax data retention and security policies could out someone.
cobertos 4y ago
Autocomplete for flatmates seems to use UK addresses only? I guess this is not meant to be a US product? Didn't find anything in my major US city anyway
- adrien248 4y ago
  That's right. Currently we are just based in the UK :) Soon we will expand in other countries.
  - klyrs 4y ago
    Come to Canada!
OJFord 4y ago
IANAL but this seems like a bit of a shaky/grey area - you couldn't make your decision not to let the room on the basis of someone not being/identifying as LGBT right? So this is kind of facilitating avoiding that 'problem' arising? I mean, imagine 'mystraightflatmate.com', the site to help you find a non-LGBT flatmate.. :/
- JumpCrisscross 4y ago
  As OP said [1], this is for LGBT persons looking for an LGBT-friendly flatware. They make be gay, trans, straight or a kitten. What they (CLARIFICATION: the flatmates advertising) aren’t is homophobic. [1] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=32154272 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=32154272
  - OJFord 4y ago
    I understand that and I sympathise, but a similar/opposite case of B&B owners not wanting a homosexual couple has been tested in UK courts: though as business owners they may refuse custom, they may not (under the discrimination act) do so on the basis of (among other protected characteristics) homosexuality. (I'm certainly not saying OP's homophobic - I don't know where that came from.)
    - JumpCrisscross 4y ago
      Legal protection versus social comfort. I, too, would take issue if the site were only for LGBT landlords or tenants. But it’s not. It’s for those comfortable broadcasting their comfort. Given the distance between the letter of the law and reality when it comes to LGBT rights and safety, this is a practical concern for e.g. gay youth kicked out of their homes who won’t be fighting anyone in court. For historical analogy, consider American hotels in the 60s advertising they’re Black friendly. They’re not only for Black Americans. But they’re welcoming towards them in a way others, following the letter but perhaps not spirit of the law, are not.
    - matthewmacleod 4y ago
      No; the site does not reject people on the basis of sexuality, but it does advertise places which are not homophobic. It's very clearly different.
jedberg 4y ago
Are worried that this will be used by bigots to target LGBT+ people by just looking up listings and getting addresses of LGBT+ people? How are you protecting the people who post listings with addresses?
- imadierich 4y ago
- xoa 4y ago
  Yes. It's a very obvious question particularly when OP specifically brings up a "safe place to live" which implies some level of vetting. I'm surprised to not see anything on their site as I write this about the service in the bottom or side nav. No "About Us", no FAQ, like who even IS this company? Without digging further I can't even see where this company is based (I'm assuming it's a registered company?). They should be addressing these basics in terms of "why trust us" I think? Actually yeah this site is genuinely weird. Like if this was a phishing site for LGBT, which to be clear is unlikely, but if it was I'd expect it to look a bit like this. Zero info at all.
  - adrien248 4y ago
    All these pages will launched in the following weeks. As they say in YCombinator "launch it ASAP". And we did it. Now we are tailoring it :) Regarding the address privacy - The information is not provided by us. The user will receive the information by the listing owner, by private message.
DiocletianCoast 4y ago
krona 4y ago
Interesting idea, but I think the site should probably have a fairly prominent legal section to explain the UK Right to Rent scheme and how it applies to the protected characteristics defined in Equality Act 2010. Otherwise landlords (which is really anyone renting out a space they own) could be putting themselves in legal jeopardy by using this site. More info: https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/right-to-rent-landlords-code-of-practice/code-of-practice-for-landlords-avoiding-unlawful-discrimination-when-conducting-right-to-rent-checks-in-the-private-rented-residential-sector-in-f#what-is-discrimination https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/right-to-rent-lan...
taurath 4y ago
You know that feeling you get when you read a newspaper or see someone report on something you know intimately, which gets the most basic elements of the story very wrong or worse gives out full falsehoods? And then you read about something you know less about but trust that its somehow a fair shake? This is what the HN community is like when talking about LGBT issues. Theoretical acceptance may have come a long way at least in the west, but empathy really does seem to have a long way to go. For your humanity, please develop a basic understanding of discrimination that certain groups suffer from, who tends to discriminate against them, and why. It will help you to understand more people, and enrich your life by being able to interact and share with people with wider ranges of experience.
jmrm 4y ago
In other webs is common to have a "gay-friendly" tag when advertising rooms, flats, houses, or when you are looking for flatmates. What does yours do differently to the other ones?
ankaAr 4y ago
So nice!! I will keep in touch with you soon using the contact form from the web.
carbadtraingood 4y ago
Why was this flagged? What the fuck?
- hackpert 4y ago
  Honestly! This is such a good initiative that it bothers me that this is flagged. Housing issues for queer people is one the biggest issues across the world. I mean the first things we consider before even booking a hotel across most of the world is "am I going to be thrown out of this?"
  - carapace 4y ago
    You can email hn@ycombinator.com to ask that it be unflagged.
- adrien248 4y ago
  I emailed the moderators and it's now unflagged! :D Thank you for your support! <3
neets 4y ago
Does anyone else think that history is sorta cyclical/rhymes and that in say 50-200 years it will be honorable to help specifically religious people find homes?

113 points by adrien248 4y ago

hirundo 4y ago

It would be a social good to do the inverse, to help the identities integrate instead of segregate. By living together we can more easily discover that our gender and sexuality define us less than our common humanity. As with our ethnicity and religion. It's easier to see this if you s/LGBT/<other>/.

Kye 4y ago
You work on that. OP can keep working on triaging the crisis of homeless LGBT people.
Elinvynia 4y ago
As long as arguments like the "trans panic" defense exist and are viable in courts, I feel like it's better for queer people to stick together. Your idea while honorable ignores the reality that queer people experience and that one of the two parties in the US is planning to strip away more of their rights. (See: Recent RvW ruling that had their next targets set, like same sex marriage)
AlecSchueler 4y ago
This really ignores that many LGBTQIA+ people face serious housing discrimination as well as increased risk from certain kinds of aggressive behaviour. That's not to mention the benefits of having people around who understand the various social, familial and professional struggles they might face, often empathizing through first hand experience. I know many queer people who prefer to live in queer friendly houses and every city I've lived in has had ad-hoc Facebook groups catering to this need.
- president 4y ago
  > This really ignores that many LGBTQIA+ people face serious housing discrimination as well as increased risk from certain kinds of aggressive behaviour. This is a really interesting statement. How would someone discriminate against someone who is LGBTQIA+ without knowing that they were or not? LGBTQIA+ is not something that can be recognized right away like skin color.
  - carbadtraingood 4y ago
    "My same sex partner and I are looking for a place to rent". "My legal ID says James, but please use Joanna". "Oh this Pride t-shirt? Yeah, last year's was a blast, thanks for noticing!" To say nothing about things like "passing" in the trans community, or stereotypes about gay men and lesbian women.
  - _gd3l 4y ago
    [dead]
  - showerst 4y ago
    I know it’s not an ideal source, but search Reddit’s legal advice subreddit sometime. There’s constant posts of people getting eviction notices because their conservative landlord saw them bring home a partner they didn’t approve of.
  - uoaei 4y ago
  - rsynnott 4y ago
    If you're _living_ with someone they're likely to figure it out. This is for helping people find flatmates. Even for non-flatmate scenarios, some landlords are remarkably nosy. Also, in many jurisdictions trans people may have legal docs in a name they don't use anymore... the list goes on. It's also reasonably common for people to be discriminated against because people _incorrectly think that they are LGBT_, incidentally.
  - taurath 4y ago
carbadtraingood 4y ago
I don't think you understand just how alienated and dangerous it is to be queer in America. There's a crisis in LGBTQ+ housing. Putting queer folks in with cishet folks puts the burden of educating those cishet folks on the shoulders of someone who is already struggling to find housing. Someone experiencing housing struggles because they are queer doesn't need the added burden of being someone's teacher. Those people who need to learn the lesson that humanity is what's important? They need to learn that without relying on minorities to teach them.
- homonculus1 4y ago
  - jjj123 4y ago
    Does this mean you’re surprised there are queer people on hn? Or that queer people are willing to talk about “queer stuff” on hn? Edited for clarity
    - homonculus1 4y ago
      - AlecSchueler 4y ago
        Couple of things to say to this. First up, this is a technical solution to problem so it seems to fit with what you miss on the first place. But secondly, in the 10+ years I've been coming to this site almost daily it has never been "highly focused" in the way you describe -- it's always been about anything that piques one's intellectual curiosity. But beyond that, being LGBTQIA+ is not a niche thing. Every workplace, classroom, and social circle I've ever been in has had LGBT members. Moreover it's not a "sexual lifestyle" it's simply a part of someone's existence. Your comment is actually bordering on homophobia and that's something I personally hadn't expected to see on HN.
        4y ago
pavon 4y ago
It is good for people to have experiences outside of their comfort zone, and to interact with others with different beliefs than their own. It is also important for people to have places and social support structures where they feel safe. A person's home should really be part of their safe space, not the stretching space.
alxjrvs 4y ago
That would be good. You know how we get to that universe? Having more queer people around. You know how we do that?
causi 4y ago
Social goods are often the inverse of individual goods. I'm not going to make anyone an involuntary advocate.
taurath 4y ago
Physical and psychological safety is a far more primary concern when it comes to a living space for someone. One’s home is, for more people, a place to relax not a place to challenge social dynamics. LGBT people regularly move across the country to find safer spaces for them to be themselves, because there isn’t much in terms of safety or community for them where they grow up.

Elinvynia 4y ago

Thank you for doing this! Getting kicked out/disowned is an unfortunately common experience for the queer youth and providing them with easy to find safe spaces is a very kind thing to do.

adrien248 4y ago
We appreciate your words! Sending love <3
Mo3 4y ago
Wtf? Landlords are kicking out queer people for being queer? I can’t imagine any possible and reasonable explanation for them to do that. In any case, nice project
- Kye 4y ago
  Queerphobia It's not a good reason but it's common enough and the targets aren't typically in a strong position to fight it. Some homeless shelters will even kick queer people out if they get in. Look up the controversy around the Salvation Army.
  - Mo3 4y ago
    Not questioning this happening, at all, but it's so unbelievably idiotic to me. It's not like queer people pay less rent or are by default bad tenants.
    - deleted 4y ago
      [deleted]
    - themacguffinman 4y ago
      It only seems idiotic because you're not really seeing it as a deeply moral issue from their point of view. I don't agree, but to them it's similar to allowing a sex offender or a pedophile as a tenant (and conflating LGBT people with pedophiles is a time-honored tradition). Even if there's zero chance that they'll do anything to anyone, it still invokes a moral revulsion. Landlords are emotional humans like everyone else, they aren't motivated solely by rent payments.

Vosporos 4y ago

Godspeed

tjpnz 4y ago

Do those listing have the ability to control the size of the map pindrop or disable it entirely? Displaying such an accurate location might make some uncomfortable.

deleted 4y ago
[deleted]

carbadtraingood 4y ago

Love it! Gay might not be the most inclusive label if you are aiming for LGBT folks (I'm queer but not gay), but hey, better to have this than not have this by a long ways!

Kye 4y ago
My guess is gay is less likely to get it nailed by filters.
- carbadtraingood 4y ago
  Possibly. It's not uncommon for folks to use gay to mean queer/LGBTQ and unintentionally exclude folks. It's a holdover from earlier gay rights and gay liberation movements. The history there is complicated. You also see folks specifically omit the T these days (LBG) to specifically include trans folks. To be clear, the OP sounds like they are a good person and I'm not accusing them of anything negative! Just noting that some folks might interpret the URL differently than intended.
  - alisonatwork 4y ago
    Personally I am not the "G" in LGBTQ+ but I prefer to be described as gay than queer, because in many parts of the world where I lived or visited, queer is still a slur and carries a lot of emotional baggage with it. I don't think it's problematic for a modern website to choose to use gay as the catch-all. Really how people choose to be referred to is just a matter of personal preference, it's not nearly as important as actions or intent. If the site is legit, people will appreciate it all the same.
    - carbadtraingood 4y ago
      Yep. Language is hard. Queer is absolutely a reclaimed slur, and comes with all that baggage, making it either political, fine, or too heavy depending on where you live. In general, I don't mind queer folks calling me queer, but I really bristle when I hear cishet folks use it.

nathanaldensr 4y ago

Is this legal in the United States? If these listings constitute "housing" then you may fall afoul of HUD regulations[1] regarding discriminating against anyone regardless of sexual orientation. i.e., if I am straight you may not be able to prevent me from using your platform to acquire housing. I'm curious to know what advice you've gotten from your lawyer on this. [1] https://www.hud.gov/program_offices/fair_housing_equal_opp/housing_discrimination_and_persons_identifying_lgbtq https://www.hud.gov/program_offices/fair_housing_equal_opp/h... > The Fair Housing Act prohibits housing and housing-related discrimination because of race, color, national origin, religion, sex (including gender identity and sexual orientation), familial status, and disability.

Pfhortune 4y ago
They aren't providing housing, merely connecting people to find common housing. By your logic, craigslist would have been crushed ages ago.
- nathanaldensr 4y ago
  I didn't provide logic; I only asked a question. The legal system tends not to be that cut-and-dry. I don't know the answer as I am not a lawyer.
- dehrmann 4y ago
  Craigslist gets some protections from Section 230. Meta, on the other hand, recently settled a suit that its ad targeting allows advertisers to discriminate[1] (full disclosure, I work for Meta, but my views are my own). Because this website is a tool with the specific purpose of discriminatory housing (vs Meta's general-purpose ad targeting), I'd be very careful. 1. https://www.engadget.com/meta-housing-discrimination-settlement-191710885.html https://www.engadget.com/meta-housing-discrimination-settlem...
  - klyrs 4y ago
    First off, much of the conversation is about the US, and the site appears to only support listings in the UK. > Find your next LGBT+ friendly household I don't see this as discriminatory. Likewise, if somebody made a site for wheelchair-accessible apartments, that wouldn't be discriminatory either.

chroem- 4y ago

carbadtraingood 4y ago
LGBT housing is safe for LGBT folks, particularly because it is either shared by or run by queer folks who are much less likely to discriminate or do violence against you because you are queer. Regular housing offers no such guarantees. Maybe it's fine, maybe it's dangerous.
- koreanguy 4y ago

3qz 4y ago

There’s no way to run a service like this without it turning into a hookup site. I would never trust a room here. Too many predators.

uoaei 4y ago
This is an interesting point. The system would likely require some kind of reputation score like ratings on other rental sites.
cp9 4y ago
in the same vein as craigslist will this site likely be used for sex work? probably does that matter? not to me. sex work is work and sex workers usually make it clear as to what their listing is about (otherwise they won't get work).
- BlargMcLarg 4y ago
  It's obviously not about sex work, but about preying on the vulnerable. Your opinion aside, quite a few countries and cultures look down on predators and trading sex for a place to live.
nathanaldensr 4y ago
Honestly, the logo including a running shower gives that impression.
adrien248 4y ago
Hi there :) Thank you for your feedback! :) I'm not sure where are you from. But in London we have the "Flatshare" culture. Sometimes people move to a room without having a clue of who will be their flatmates (and it happen to me in my first home)... We recomemend our users to meet their flatmates before having a tenancy. But this should be applied for anyone, not exclusively LGBT+ people. :) Regarding "hookup site", we believe there's other apps better developed for that purpose. But actually, on Grindr (most used gay dating app) you can find enumerous profiles saying "Looking for room" or "Room available".
matthewmacleod 4y ago

koreanguy 4y ago

upupandup 4y ago

In the anecdotes provided by my peers, LGBTQ friendly or LGBTQ only type of housing is rife for violence and bullying. You'd think that naturally people who are pushed to the fringes would be kind to each other, and it just isn't the case. There's just magnified amount of animosity that can quickly grow especially. So while I applaud the good intention, the actual reality is pretty grim, the ideal solution would be to let LGBTQ people live like any other people. However, we decided to label and group and trying to get them to create their own bubbles and I feel like this is not diversity but systematic exclusion. Pretty soon we will see LGBTQ ghettos and the same level of exploitation that comes when you concentrate people with all sorts of personal boundaries/expectations that are not aligned. The idea that LGBTQ are somehow all united and see themselves on a flat hierarchy is misplaced and its a recipe for disaster. It should be like in Japan, where the mainstream isn't really forced to adopt any particular views or forced to hire people from said groups but still get along respectably and more importantly, people simply do not put so much emphasis on sexuality like in Judeo-Christian societies. Lastly, LGBTQ in Japan does not wonder about getting killed by some flag bearing closeted and insecure, violent and poor groups. Kindergartens in Japan aren't having mass shooter drills or building bulletproof panic lockers. Neither country is better than the other, each has its own ups and downs but In Japan you can have gay/trans walk around and they aren't worried for their safety or facing violence from strangers. In West you can have gay/trans marriages and rights but they are walking around fearing for violence from strangers even in "liberal progressive" hoods. Japan is also in process of introducing gay marriages, trans rights, albeit slow.

carbadtraingood 4y ago
Japan doesn't allow gay marriage, iirc?
- kayodelycaon 4y ago
  Correct: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Recognition_of_same-sex_unions_in_Japan https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Recognition_of_same-sex_unions...
- david_allison 4y ago

dehrmann 4y ago

Someone already called out HUD. The other thing to be very careful with is PII because what you have could be incredibly sensitive. I wouldn't be so worried on the legal front, but more a personal front that I wouldn't sleep well at night knowing lax data retention and security policies could out someone.

cobertos 4y ago

Autocomplete for flatmates seems to use UK addresses only? I guess this is not meant to be a US product? Didn't find anything in my major US city anyway

adrien248 4y ago
That's right. Currently we are just based in the UK :) Soon we will expand in other countries.
- klyrs 4y ago
  Come to Canada!

OJFord 4y ago

IANAL but this seems like a bit of a shaky/grey area - you couldn't make your decision not to let the room on the basis of someone not being/identifying as LGBT right? So this is kind of facilitating avoiding that 'problem' arising? I mean, imagine 'mystraightflatmate.com', the site to help you find a non-LGBT flatmate.. :/

JumpCrisscross 4y ago
As OP said [1], this is for LGBT persons looking for an LGBT-friendly flatware. They make be gay, trans, straight or a kitten. What they (CLARIFICATION: the flatmates advertising) aren’t is homophobic. [1] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=32154272 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=32154272
- OJFord 4y ago
  I understand that and I sympathise, but a similar/opposite case of B&B owners not wanting a homosexual couple has been tested in UK courts: though as business owners they may refuse custom, they may not (under the discrimination act) do so on the basis of (among other protected characteristics) homosexuality. (I'm certainly not saying OP's homophobic - I don't know where that came from.)
  - JumpCrisscross 4y ago
    Legal protection versus social comfort. I, too, would take issue if the site were only for LGBT landlords or tenants. But it’s not. It’s for those comfortable broadcasting their comfort. Given the distance between the letter of the law and reality when it comes to LGBT rights and safety, this is a practical concern for e.g. gay youth kicked out of their homes who won’t be fighting anyone in court. For historical analogy, consider American hotels in the 60s advertising they’re Black friendly. They’re not only for Black Americans. But they’re welcoming towards them in a way others, following the letter but perhaps not spirit of the law, are not.
  - matthewmacleod 4y ago
    No; the site does not reject people on the basis of sexuality, but it does advertise places which are not homophobic. It's very clearly different.

jedberg 4y ago

Are worried that this will be used by bigots to target LGBT+ people by just looking up listings and getting addresses of LGBT+ people? How are you protecting the people who post listings with addresses?

imadierich 4y ago
xoa 4y ago
Yes. It's a very obvious question particularly when OP specifically brings up a "safe place to live" which implies some level of vetting. I'm surprised to not see anything on their site as I write this about the service in the bottom or side nav. No "About Us", no FAQ, like who even IS this company? Without digging further I can't even see where this company is based (I'm assuming it's a registered company?). They should be addressing these basics in terms of "why trust us" I think? Actually yeah this site is genuinely weird. Like if this was a phishing site for LGBT, which to be clear is unlikely, but if it was I'd expect it to look a bit like this. Zero info at all.
- adrien248 4y ago
  All these pages will launched in the following weeks. As they say in YCombinator "launch it ASAP". And we did it. Now we are tailoring it :) Regarding the address privacy - The information is not provided by us. The user will receive the information by the listing owner, by private message.

DiocletianCoast 4y ago

krona 4y ago

Interesting idea, but I think the site should probably have a fairly prominent legal section to explain the UK Right to Rent scheme and how it applies to the protected characteristics defined in Equality Act 2010. Otherwise landlords (which is really anyone renting out a space they own) could be putting themselves in legal jeopardy by using this site. More info: https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/right-to-rent-landlords-code-of-practice/code-of-practice-for-landlords-avoiding-unlawful-discrimination-when-conducting-right-to-rent-checks-in-the-private-rented-residential-sector-in-f#what-is-discrimination https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/right-to-rent-lan...

taurath 4y ago

You know that feeling you get when you read a newspaper or see someone report on something you know intimately, which gets the most basic elements of the story very wrong or worse gives out full falsehoods? And then you read about something you know less about but trust that its somehow a fair shake? This is what the HN community is like when talking about LGBT issues. Theoretical acceptance may have come a long way at least in the west, but empathy really does seem to have a long way to go. For your humanity, please develop a basic understanding of discrimination that certain groups suffer from, who tends to discriminate against them, and why. It will help you to understand more people, and enrich your life by being able to interact and share with people with wider ranges of experience.

jmrm 4y ago

In other webs is common to have a "gay-friendly" tag when advertising rooms, flats, houses, or when you are looking for flatmates. What does yours do differently to the other ones?

ankaAr 4y ago

So nice!! I will keep in touch with you soon using the contact form from the web.

carbadtraingood 4y ago

Why was this flagged? What the fuck?

hackpert 4y ago
Honestly! This is such a good initiative that it bothers me that this is flagged. Housing issues for queer people is one the biggest issues across the world. I mean the first things we consider before even booking a hotel across most of the world is "am I going to be thrown out of this?"
- carapace 4y ago
  You can email hn@ycombinator.com to ask that it be unflagged.
adrien248 4y ago
I emailed the moderators and it's now unflagged! :D Thank you for your support! <3

neets 4y ago

Does anyone else think that history is sorta cyclical/rhymes and that in say 50-200 years it will be honorable to help specifically religious people find homes?