4 ms·

Good thought. My immediate response is "yeah, I really didn't get the games other people were playing in junior high," which is the time frame the article evok

Good thought. My immediate response is "yeah, I really didn't get the games other people were playing in junior high," which is the time frame the article evokes for me. I feel like the gotcha is you have to realize - at least sometimes - that there are still games you don't get. It's easy to feel like, "at ${year - 1} I was such an idiot, glad that's over now." You'd be surprised how many years in a row you can feel that way before the meta realization sinks in. Understanding other people is like learning to play "Have You Got It Yet?"[1]: > When Pink Floyd gathered in January 1968 for one of their first rehearsals as a quintet, Barrett shared a new composition he called “Have You Got It Yet?” The song sounded straightforward, but the band became confused as they tried to join in and learn the number. The melody and structure seemed to shift on each run-through, with Barrett gleefully singing a chorus of “Have you got it yet? Have you got it yet?” at them. > Eventually they realized that Barrett was changing the arrangement each time, deliberately making the song impossible to learn. “We didn’t get it for quite a long time,” says Gilmour in Rob Chapman’s book A Very Irregular Head. “I remember the moment and the song well. It was really just a 12-bar, but the responses were always in the wrong places according to Syd. [1]: https://www.rollingstone.com/feature/syd-barrett-10-things-you-didnt-know-about-pink-floyds-crazy-diamond-225236/ https://www.rollingstone.com/feature/syd-barrett-10-things-y...

draw_down 4y ago
Indeed, as well as learning to accept that there are some games you'll just never be good at. Personally, I've never been good at playing the political game at work so I don't attempt to. There are times when I can tell it's being played, but maybe not even who exactly is playing, let alone what their strategy is or what a strategy might look like. It seems difficult and not fun at all though, so I'm ok with this inability.
- corndoge 4y ago
  not that the sentiment isn't legitimate but i wonder if your ostensible acceptance of inability is deep down a feeling of superiority for refusing to engage wrapped in mild self deprecation and faux gracious acceptance of a personal shortcoming, the acknowledgement of which is itself mildly performative - a wrapper perhaps palatable to this audience due to familiarity but distasteful to most others
  - enugu 4y ago
    Given that lot of politicking is socially damaging (but promotes interests of a person or a small group), it can be valid to feel good about not engaging in it(maybe not proud) - just like say one might feel good about being honest. Of course, one can use political skills in a beneficial way(for which purpose it is worth learning). That is rare. Secondly, being innocent or straightforward is itself a political strategy even if not deployed consciously. This signals that other people can read you directly and hence rely on your words and that you wont backstab etc. Societies which have this level of trustworthiness also tend to flourish.
  - switchbak 4y ago
    That's a whole lot of assumption for just reading a couple paragraphs someone wrote. I find that level of ungrounded speculation is almost always rooted in projection. That's interesting too, but moreso because what it reveals about you. And hey, some of it could even be accurate, but there's really no way you could know that from this little information.
    - corndoge 4y ago
      I completely agree with you
  - draw_down 4y ago
- smeej 4y ago
  I find I make this choice a lot, not to play games that don't seem enjoyable to me and/or where I don't think I would have much of a knack for them. I struggle, though, to communicate to others that I don't think any less of them for choosing to play those games. If they're enjoying them, especially if they're also experiencing the success they want from them, I tend to think they should keep playing. I just have a hard time convincing people I'm sincerely only making a subjective judgment when I opt out. The combination of effort, results, costs, and rewards isn't right for me personally to choose to do it, but if it is for them, I'm glad for them, and they should.
  - deleted 4y ago
    [deleted]
  - t-3 4y ago
    Not understanding the political implications of personal nonparticipation in politics is very delightfully ironic. The only way to win is to be invisible.
Aeolun 4y ago
> You'd be surprised how many years in a row you can feel that way before the meta realization sinks in. I think that meta feeling comes quite quickly, it’s just that you cannot yet grasp the full scope of your naivete. Every year I feel more cynical and look back on my younger self with a mixture of awe and horror. It’s becoming more and more apparent to me why it is young people that change the world.
- physicles 4y ago
  The older I get, the more I hold the following two thoughts simultaneously in my head: - "Young people are insufferable. They know nothing but think they know everything." - "Thank $deity for young people. They have the naïveté to question everything and the energy to try fixing it."
  - Aeolun 4y ago
    I’m content to keep the world running while they do it.
Zababa 4y ago
> It's easy to feel like, "at ${year - 1} I was such an idiot, glad that's over now." You'd be surprised how many years in a row you can feel that way before the meta realization sinks in. I'd frame it a little bit differently: "Between last year and now, I grew.". I've found that the best way to avoid feeling like an idiot is to keep an open mind and don't consider others as idiots. For example, I was bullied when I was younger. It took me a long time to change my attitude when meeting new people from defensive to barely neutral. And I have still progress to make here. I still have a hard time understanding my feelings and those of other people. But each year, I make some progress. I'm a bit less stupid, a bit more sensitive, people are a bit more happy to be around me. As you said too, accepting that there are some things that you just don't get is important. It's going from a one dimensional scale (that thing is either better or worse than what I'm doing) to a multi dimensional one (I don't understand why that person is doing that thing but it's their life).
Sohcahtoa82 4y ago
> It's easy to feel like, "at ${year - 1} I was such an idiot, glad that's over now." Reminds me of an old "Red vs Blue" video about tattoos. [0] One of the arguments presented against getting tattoos was: "You are an idiot, and I'd like to prove this mathematically. Take your current age and subtract 10 years. Were you smart back then? Hell no, you were an idiot. And you're still just as much of an idiot now, it's just going to take you 10 more years to realize it." [0] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2pSt2gACrc https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2pSt2gACrc

draw_down 4y ago

Indeed, as well as learning to accept that there are some games you'll just never be good at. Personally, I've never been good at playing the political game at work so I don't attempt to. There are times when I can tell it's being played, but maybe not even who exactly is playing, let alone what their strategy is or what a strategy might look like. It seems difficult and not fun at all though, so I'm ok with this inability.

corndoge 4y ago
not that the sentiment isn't legitimate but i wonder if your ostensible acceptance of inability is deep down a feeling of superiority for refusing to engage wrapped in mild self deprecation and faux gracious acceptance of a personal shortcoming, the acknowledgement of which is itself mildly performative - a wrapper perhaps palatable to this audience due to familiarity but distasteful to most others
- enugu 4y ago
  Given that lot of politicking is socially damaging (but promotes interests of a person or a small group), it can be valid to feel good about not engaging in it(maybe not proud) - just like say one might feel good about being honest. Of course, one can use political skills in a beneficial way(for which purpose it is worth learning). That is rare. Secondly, being innocent or straightforward is itself a political strategy even if not deployed consciously. This signals that other people can read you directly and hence rely on your words and that you wont backstab etc. Societies which have this level of trustworthiness also tend to flourish.
- switchbak 4y ago
  That's a whole lot of assumption for just reading a couple paragraphs someone wrote. I find that level of ungrounded speculation is almost always rooted in projection. That's interesting too, but moreso because what it reveals about you. And hey, some of it could even be accurate, but there's really no way you could know that from this little information.
  - corndoge 4y ago
    I completely agree with you
- draw_down 4y ago
smeej 4y ago
I find I make this choice a lot, not to play games that don't seem enjoyable to me and/or where I don't think I would have much of a knack for them. I struggle, though, to communicate to others that I don't think any less of them for choosing to play those games. If they're enjoying them, especially if they're also experiencing the success they want from them, I tend to think they should keep playing. I just have a hard time convincing people I'm sincerely only making a subjective judgment when I opt out. The combination of effort, results, costs, and rewards isn't right for me personally to choose to do it, but if it is for them, I'm glad for them, and they should.
- deleted 4y ago
  [deleted]
- t-3 4y ago
  Not understanding the political implications of personal nonparticipation in politics is very delightfully ironic. The only way to win is to be invisible.

Aeolun 4y ago

> You'd be surprised how many years in a row you can feel that way before the meta realization sinks in. I think that meta feeling comes quite quickly, it’s just that you cannot yet grasp the full scope of your naivete. Every year I feel more cynical and look back on my younger self with a mixture of awe and horror. It’s becoming more and more apparent to me why it is young people that change the world.

physicles 4y ago
The older I get, the more I hold the following two thoughts simultaneously in my head: - "Young people are insufferable. They know nothing but think they know everything." - "Thank $deity for young people. They have the naïveté to question everything and the energy to try fixing it."
- Aeolun 4y ago
  I’m content to keep the world running while they do it.

Zababa 4y ago

> It's easy to feel like, "at ${year - 1} I was such an idiot, glad that's over now." You'd be surprised how many years in a row you can feel that way before the meta realization sinks in. I'd frame it a little bit differently: "Between last year and now, I grew.". I've found that the best way to avoid feeling like an idiot is to keep an open mind and don't consider others as idiots. For example, I was bullied when I was younger. It took me a long time to change my attitude when meeting new people from defensive to barely neutral. And I have still progress to make here. I still have a hard time understanding my feelings and those of other people. But each year, I make some progress. I'm a bit less stupid, a bit more sensitive, people are a bit more happy to be around me. As you said too, accepting that there are some things that you just don't get is important. It's going from a one dimensional scale (that thing is either better or worse than what I'm doing) to a multi dimensional one (I don't understand why that person is doing that thing but it's their life).

Sohcahtoa82 4y ago

> It's easy to feel like, "at ${year - 1} I was such an idiot, glad that's over now." Reminds me of an old "Red vs Blue" video about tattoos. [0] One of the arguments presented against getting tattoos was: "You are an idiot, and I'd like to prove this mathematically. Take your current age and subtract 10 years. Were you smart back then? Hell no, you were an idiot. And you're still just as much of an idiot now, it's just going to take you 10 more years to realize it." [0] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2pSt2gACrc https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2pSt2gACrc