5 ms·

You can host your own email. I have been hosting my own for at least 15 years now, and I don't have big issues - I can deliver email to MS, gmail, et al. Pick

You can host your own email. I have been hosting my own for at least 15 years now, and I don't have big issues - I can deliver email to MS, gmail, et al. Pick a decent hosting provider (not the cheapest options around!), make sure you have matching reverse DNS, forward DNS and HELO name (exactly the same is best!) on both v4 and v6 (if you have v6), disable IPv6 privacy addressing for your mail server (again, if you have v6), make sure you set up SPF, DKIM and DMARC, and keep your server secured. By following these rules, in 15 years I have had only had deliverability issues with AT&T and Deutsche Telekom - both of which were fairly easily resolved. In terms of software, you can use one of the out-of-the-box email server packages, but I personally run postfix, dovecot and rspamd on a debian stable VM. Stick to the versions from the repos and you'll have very few problems upgrading it in future, too - my current mailserver VM started on Debian Squeeze or Lenny around 2010, and is currently on bullseye (the latest stable).

Dave3of5 4y ago
Basically the same setup as me other than I use ubuntu.
baobabKoodaa 4y ago
> Pick a decent hosting provider (not the cheapest options around!), make sure you have matching reverse DNS, forward DNS and HELO name (exactly the same is best!) on both v4 and v6 (if you have v6), disable IPv6 privacy addressing for your mail server (again, if you have v6), make sure you set up SPF, DKIM and DMARC, and keep your server secured. By following these rules, in 15 years I have had only had deliverability issues with AT&T and Deutsche Telekom - both of which were fairly easily resolved. How did you measure your deliverability? If this is true, then congratz for succeeding, but it's still bad advice to give to other people, as most people will not succeed no matter how many hours they put into that.
- minimaul 4y ago
  By the fact I get answers to emails I send to others (eg people using gsuite, people using o365), and I don't get issues from the sites that I run that use the mail server for sending - it sends confirmation emails for a forum I run, for example. I know that gmail, o365, yahoo, aol, etc work, because people use those emails to sign up and manage to validate their accounts. I don't agree that most people will not succeed, I know many other people personally who run their own mail servers. It's doable, and it's not nearly as bad as some like to make out. I've run low volume mail servers and high volume mail servers sending (GDPR compliant!) marketing mail. edit: where low volume = <1 outbound message a day.
  - baobabKoodaa 4y ago
    > By the fact I get answers to emails I send to others (eg people using gsuite, people using o365) Do you get answers to 100% of emails you send? I don't find this plausible. Now, if you get answers to maybe 30% of emails you send, how do you know the other 70% is just because people didn't write anything back? How are you ruling out the possibility that some of those 70% never received your email in the first place? > I don't get issues from the sites that I run that use the mail server for sending - it sends confirmation emails for a forum I run, for example. So far I haven't encountered a single email provider that successfully delivers 100% of mail sent. Postmark sometimes fails to deliver, SendGrid sometimes fails to deliver, etc. But you're claiming that you have found the secret sauce and you actually have better deliverability than SendGrid and Postmark - and that's for confirmation emails of all things, the type of mail that very often lands in the spam folder. I don't believe you.
    - minimaul 4y ago
      > Do you get answers to 100% of emails you send? I don't find this plausible. Now, if you get answers to maybe 30% of emails you send, how do you know the other 70% is just because people didn't write anything back? How are you ruling out the possibility that some of those 70% never received your email in the first place? Most of the personal email I send is to companies where I do expect and get responses, or to my family, or to mailing lists. I know family get my emails because they respond. I know companies do because they respond to support queries. I know mailing lists do because I see my messages in the list archives. I know there’s a good mix of receiving operators because I get DMARC reports etc. > So far I haven't encountered a single email provider that successfully delivers 100% of mail sent. Postmark sometimes fails to deliver, SendGrid sometimes fails to deliver, etc. But you're claiming that you have found the secret sauce and you actually have better deliverability than SendGrid and Postmark - and that's for confirmation emails of all things, the type of mail that very often lands in the spam folder. I don't believe you. I don’t really care if my email ends up in spam folders as long as it does not get dropped on the floor entirely, but I genuinely do not get complaints where people have not received/can’t find their confirmation emails. I do practise good automated email hygiene (automatic removal when things bounce permanently, etc). I don’t know what to say that will convince you that I have not personally experienced issues except with DT and AT&T, but… I haven’t.
mattbee 4y ago
I've run the mailu.io stack for 4 years off a Hetzner dedicated server. It's an easy stack to set up and update through several major versions. About 25 different mail users, friends and family who aren't in IT. The issues I've had have been Microsoft (hotmail/outlook/office365) dumping messages into their Spam folder, but that went away in the last year. I had put in a hack to deliver to Microsoft through a more "reputable" SMTP host, but only when people complained. I'd say give it a go with a new email address, any software that seems manageable to you, and move your usage over gradually.

Dave3of5 4y ago

Basically the same setup as me other than I use ubuntu.

baobabKoodaa 4y ago

> Pick a decent hosting provider (not the cheapest options around!), make sure you have matching reverse DNS, forward DNS and HELO name (exactly the same is best!) on both v4 and v6 (if you have v6), disable IPv6 privacy addressing for your mail server (again, if you have v6), make sure you set up SPF, DKIM and DMARC, and keep your server secured. By following these rules, in 15 years I have had only had deliverability issues with AT&T and Deutsche Telekom - both of which were fairly easily resolved. How did you measure your deliverability? If this is true, then congratz for succeeding, but it's still bad advice to give to other people, as most people will not succeed no matter how many hours they put into that.

minimaul 4y ago
By the fact I get answers to emails I send to others (eg people using gsuite, people using o365), and I don't get issues from the sites that I run that use the mail server for sending - it sends confirmation emails for a forum I run, for example. I know that gmail, o365, yahoo, aol, etc work, because people use those emails to sign up and manage to validate their accounts. I don't agree that most people will not succeed, I know many other people personally who run their own mail servers. It's doable, and it's not nearly as bad as some like to make out. I've run low volume mail servers and high volume mail servers sending (GDPR compliant!) marketing mail. edit: where low volume = <1 outbound message a day.
- baobabKoodaa 4y ago
  > By the fact I get answers to emails I send to others (eg people using gsuite, people using o365) Do you get answers to 100% of emails you send? I don't find this plausible. Now, if you get answers to maybe 30% of emails you send, how do you know the other 70% is just because people didn't write anything back? How are you ruling out the possibility that some of those 70% never received your email in the first place? > I don't get issues from the sites that I run that use the mail server for sending - it sends confirmation emails for a forum I run, for example. So far I haven't encountered a single email provider that successfully delivers 100% of mail sent. Postmark sometimes fails to deliver, SendGrid sometimes fails to deliver, etc. But you're claiming that you have found the secret sauce and you actually have better deliverability than SendGrid and Postmark - and that's for confirmation emails of all things, the type of mail that very often lands in the spam folder. I don't believe you.
  - minimaul 4y ago
    > Do you get answers to 100% of emails you send? I don't find this plausible. Now, if you get answers to maybe 30% of emails you send, how do you know the other 70% is just because people didn't write anything back? How are you ruling out the possibility that some of those 70% never received your email in the first place? Most of the personal email I send is to companies where I do expect and get responses, or to my family, or to mailing lists. I know family get my emails because they respond. I know companies do because they respond to support queries. I know mailing lists do because I see my messages in the list archives. I know there’s a good mix of receiving operators because I get DMARC reports etc. > So far I haven't encountered a single email provider that successfully delivers 100% of mail sent. Postmark sometimes fails to deliver, SendGrid sometimes fails to deliver, etc. But you're claiming that you have found the secret sauce and you actually have better deliverability than SendGrid and Postmark - and that's for confirmation emails of all things, the type of mail that very often lands in the spam folder. I don't believe you. I don’t really care if my email ends up in spam folders as long as it does not get dropped on the floor entirely, but I genuinely do not get complaints where people have not received/can’t find their confirmation emails. I do practise good automated email hygiene (automatic removal when things bounce permanently, etc). I don’t know what to say that will convince you that I have not personally experienced issues except with DT and AT&T, but… I haven’t.

mattbee 4y ago

I've run the mailu.io stack for 4 years off a Hetzner dedicated server. It's an easy stack to set up and update through several major versions. About 25 different mail users, friends and family who aren't in IT. The issues I've had have been Microsoft (hotmail/outlook/office365) dumping messages into their Spam folder, but that went away in the last year. I had put in a hack to deliver to Microsoft through a more "reputable" SMTP host, but only when people complained. I'd say give it a go with a new email address, any software that seems manageable to you, and move your usage over gradually.