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My wife quit her teaching job once we had kids and hasn't looked back. Looking after children is a full time job in and of itself. Just because you aren't being

My wife quit her teaching job once we had kids and hasn't looked back. Looking after children is a full time job in and of itself. Just because you aren't being paid by an employer doesn't mean you aren't doing something valuable. In fact, you could argue that the job of raising children is even more valuable. Sadly this option seems entirely over looked in these types of discussions.

bluesroo 5y ago
Thanks for the reply! We've had long discussions about all the options (one job + one stay at home, moving to a cheaper area, part time, etc.) but both of us at the end of the day are fairly ambitious and want to have careers. Also, in order to be next to our families (not just parents, but siblings and grandparents) the CoL is pretty high and having 2 incomes is required. She's not frustrated with needing to work, it's frustration with the sheer number of hours. A more normal job that would allow us to drop off the kids and pick them up together consistently would be great.
fdgsdfogijq 5y ago
This needs to be screamed from the mountain tops
- mixmastamyk 5y ago
  You don’t buy a home on one income any longer.
  - notsureaboutpg 5y ago
  - jameshush 5y ago
    I mean… you can choose to live in a less expensive area. Especially if one person is a software engineer where remote work is available. Will choosing to live in a different area mean you’ll go from making $500k TC to $150k or $100k? Perhaps . We grew up in a duplex and my brother and I shared a bedroom for years because my parents wanted my mom to focus on taking care of us. I genuinely didn’t realize that our house was technically “worse” than my peers, until I was chatting to my dad about it last year and he mentioned the choice they made. If you don’t want to make that choice, that’s OK too. I choose to listen to death metal music, I don’t expect others to make the sane choices as me. :)
    - bluesroo 5y ago
      We've definitely considered it! Unfortunately both of our families are from the same area and it is very high CoL. Not only parents, but grandparents, siblings, aunts/uncles all live within 30 minutes of us... Luckily our parents help out with the finances a bit to help us through the first base stretch of our mortgage. While it would ease things for us financially to move, we'd be giving up A LOT with family to do so.

bluesroo 5y ago

Thanks for the reply! We've had long discussions about all the options (one job + one stay at home, moving to a cheaper area, part time, etc.) but both of us at the end of the day are fairly ambitious and want to have careers. Also, in order to be next to our families (not just parents, but siblings and grandparents) the CoL is pretty high and having 2 incomes is required. She's not frustrated with needing to work, it's frustration with the sheer number of hours. A more normal job that would allow us to drop off the kids and pick them up together consistently would be great.

fdgsdfogijq 5y ago

This needs to be screamed from the mountain tops

mixmastamyk 5y ago
You don’t buy a home on one income any longer.
- notsureaboutpg 5y ago
- jameshush 5y ago
  I mean… you can choose to live in a less expensive area. Especially if one person is a software engineer where remote work is available. Will choosing to live in a different area mean you’ll go from making $500k TC to $150k or $100k? Perhaps . We grew up in a duplex and my brother and I shared a bedroom for years because my parents wanted my mom to focus on taking care of us. I genuinely didn’t realize that our house was technically “worse” than my peers, until I was chatting to my dad about it last year and he mentioned the choice they made. If you don’t want to make that choice, that’s OK too. I choose to listen to death metal music, I don’t expect others to make the sane choices as me. :)
  - bluesroo 5y ago
    We've definitely considered it! Unfortunately both of our families are from the same area and it is very high CoL. Not only parents, but grandparents, siblings, aunts/uncles all live within 30 minutes of us... Luckily our parents help out with the finances a bit to help us through the first base stretch of our mortgage. While it would ease things for us financially to move, we'd be giving up A LOT with family to do so.