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I've been interested in whether technical work actually hurts social skills. Maybe not for everyone, but for some. I've found that when I really throw my mind i

I've been interested in whether technical work actually hurts social skills. Maybe not for everyone, but for some. I've found that when I really throw my mind into stuff for extended periods of time, I think my social skills do digress. Maybe it's just in my head. It also seems like many engineers start neglecting their tech skills and their social skills get better. Of course, that's often part of a concerted effort to improve... but often it does seem that the technical skills suffer at least somewhat. Sometimes it doesn't even seem that they're doing different work (more management stuff).

pfraze 5y ago
I’m pretty sure you’re right. Nowadays I tend to be fairly modal: if I’m “in my head” then social contact is bizarre and disruptive and I can’t come off like a human being. If I’m in the other mode, social contact is easy but I’m probably not doing deep work. As a younger engineer, I was locked in my head and all social experiences were difficult.
- P_I_Staker 5y ago
  Yeah, you can become more Sheldon like... it's weird. There's ways to temper this; I've seen it done. You're slower with one liners and fun quips, want to over explain, and get everything right, or just kinda dead and slow. Idk, there's a lot of behaviors, they vary.
seanmcdirmid 5y ago
> I've been interested in whether technical work actually hurts social skills. Correlation isn't causation. Hurt social skills could also lead to more interest in technical work. ALOT of SWEs aren't interested in people management for that reason, and its a blessing that FAANGs allow people to advance on IC tracks (though still developing some communication skills are necessary as your level rises). As for if practicing social skills hurts technical skills, well, it is taking away time from practicing them so there should be some negative effect. A full time people manager often simply doesn't have much time to apply their technical skills as much as they'd like.
- P_I_Staker 5y ago
  I think the point of my comment got lost a bit. It's like when I start diving deep into technical work, my head spins. I get zoned in, later fatigued, and I think there's some behavior change. I notice this even in the short term. Sure you could work on both (and most devs are now), and it could just be how people spend time developing their skills, but I feel there was something more there. I felt a growing disconnection from normies that went away when I changed my habits. In the short term it would be like an acute thing that wore off in a few hours to a few days. If I was doing it long term, it would last longer. Maybe it's in my head. I don't think everyone is effected.
  - seanmcdirmid 5y ago
    > It's like when I start diving deep into technical work, my head spins. I get zoned in, later fatigued, and I think there's some behavior change. I feel the same way with deep social interaction, but diving deep into technical work usually is invigorating, so I guess I can't really empathize. My hardest days at work are full/half day morale events :).

pfraze 5y ago

I’m pretty sure you’re right. Nowadays I tend to be fairly modal: if I’m “in my head” then social contact is bizarre and disruptive and I can’t come off like a human being. If I’m in the other mode, social contact is easy but I’m probably not doing deep work. As a younger engineer, I was locked in my head and all social experiences were difficult.

P_I_Staker 5y ago
Yeah, you can become more Sheldon like... it's weird. There's ways to temper this; I've seen it done. You're slower with one liners and fun quips, want to over explain, and get everything right, or just kinda dead and slow. Idk, there's a lot of behaviors, they vary.

seanmcdirmid 5y ago

> I've been interested in whether technical work actually hurts social skills. Correlation isn't causation. Hurt social skills could also lead to more interest in technical work. ALOT of SWEs aren't interested in people management for that reason, and its a blessing that FAANGs allow people to advance on IC tracks (though still developing some communication skills are necessary as your level rises). As for if practicing social skills hurts technical skills, well, it is taking away time from practicing them so there should be some negative effect. A full time people manager often simply doesn't have much time to apply their technical skills as much as they'd like.

P_I_Staker 5y ago
I think the point of my comment got lost a bit. It's like when I start diving deep into technical work, my head spins. I get zoned in, later fatigued, and I think there's some behavior change. I notice this even in the short term. Sure you could work on both (and most devs are now), and it could just be how people spend time developing their skills, but I feel there was something more there. I felt a growing disconnection from normies that went away when I changed my habits. In the short term it would be like an acute thing that wore off in a few hours to a few days. If I was doing it long term, it would last longer. Maybe it's in my head. I don't think everyone is effected.
- seanmcdirmid 5y ago
  > It's like when I start diving deep into technical work, my head spins. I get zoned in, later fatigued, and I think there's some behavior change. I feel the same way with deep social interaction, but diving deep into technical work usually is invigorating, so I guess I can't really empathize. My hardest days at work are full/half day morale events :).