4 ms·

Its also important to remove any doubt - to strengthen the bond in the cases where its true

jakimfett 5y ago
Given that before birth, it's the woman's body, and after birth it's the child's body being tested, and there is no clear medical case for paternity testing being a life-saving operation somehow... --- ...a mandatory test puts serious amounts of potential harm in the hands of a field that historically (and as demonstrated by some of the regrettable opinions expressed in this conversation thread), completely ignores the rights and consent of a woman and child while discussing how men might feel or believe about said topics. Relationships are complex things, and blanket legislation will never respect the full consent of the individuals involved. Give the mother freedom to request a pre-birth paternity test, and the child to request the results once they hit their teens, with confidential results. Anything past that is a relationship issue (does your spouse / child feel safe telling you the truth?), and any form of mandatory testing pre-birth would very much violate the bodily consent of the mother. Post-birth, if it's not a medically necessary operation, which paternity is not, it waits for when the kid is old enough to understand consent. Consent is not a debate. Consent is about functional boundary. In this case, it is simple: Not your body? Not your choice. Enable (their) choice instead of trying to control women and children's bodies, please.
- hackerfromthefu 5y ago
  You seem to have missed the point, you mention that the mother and the child should have freedom to request a paternity test .. but in the vast majority of cases the mother knows, it's the father that does not know. In all cases the child is the mothers child, where the father can be tricked/defrauded into the most expensive cost they will ever bear for the rest of their life, on the basis of a lie. This is very obvious, completely unaddressed in your comment, and the rest of your argument is probably in bad faith.
imtringued 5y ago
> to strengthen the bond in the cases where its true You mean when the parental relationship is compatible with the wishes of the potential step father. Knowing that the child isn't yours can be useful in either direction. Either you know it from the start and accept it from the start, or you refuse it from the start. This idea that we shouldn't bear bad news and hide them, hoping to profit off the confusion, is a horrible way to run a society. Learn to deal with the bad news. (ignoring them is how situations escalate and get way worse than they should be)

Given that before birth, it's the woman's body, and after birth it's the child's body being tested, and there is no clear medical case for paternity testing being a life-saving operation somehow... --- ...a mandatory test puts serious amounts of potential harm in the hands of a field that historically (and as demonstrated by some of the regrettable opinions expressed in this conversation thread), completely ignores the rights and consent of a woman and child while discussing how men might feel or believe about said topics. Relationships are complex things, and blanket legislation will never respect the full consent of the individuals involved. Give the mother freedom to request a pre-birth paternity test, and the child to request the results once they hit their teens, with confidential results. Anything past that is a relationship issue (does your spouse / child feel safe telling you the truth?), and any form of mandatory testing pre-birth would very much violate the bodily consent of the mother. Post-birth, if it's not a medically necessary operation, which paternity is not, it waits for when the kid is old enough to understand consent. Consent is not a debate. Consent is about functional boundary. In this case, it is simple: Not your body? Not your choice. Enable (their) choice instead of trying to control women and children's bodies, please.

hackerfromthefu 5y ago
You seem to have missed the point, you mention that the mother and the child should have freedom to request a paternity test .. but in the vast majority of cases the mother knows, it's the father that does not know. In all cases the child is the mothers child, where the father can be tricked/defrauded into the most expensive cost they will ever bear for the rest of their life, on the basis of a lie. This is very obvious, completely unaddressed in your comment, and the rest of your argument is probably in bad faith.

imtringued 5y ago

> to strengthen the bond in the cases where its true You mean when the parental relationship is compatible with the wishes of the potential step father. Knowing that the child isn't yours can be useful in either direction. Either you know it from the start and accept it from the start, or you refuse it from the start. This idea that we shouldn't bear bad news and hide them, hoping to profit off the confusion, is a horrible way to run a society. Learn to deal with the bad news. (ignoring them is how situations escalate and get way worse than they should be)