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I worked in wealth management and LIVED the hedonistic treadmill firsthand. Everyone was jealous of the next level up. I was making 300k and my high school ho

I worked in wealth management and LIVED the hedonistic treadmill firsthand. Everyone was jealous of the next level up. I was making 300k and my high school hometown friends were like "holy cow, you're so lucky this is amazing, you have your own apartment" meanwhile I was annoyed I couldn't keep up financially with my trust fund boyfriend who had $3 million a year to piss away with random trips to Bermuda. My CFO was jealous of the Principal who could take netjets and didn't have to fly first class everywhere. The NetJets guy was jealous of the billionaire principal who had his own jet. That billionaire was jealous of the main money dude who had family money inherited from the crusades. They all fought with their wives over private school tuition and horses. Everyone drank, did tons of drugs, had dramatic affairs and fought like cats and dogs with their families. I left finance and went into healthcare and realized I'm pretty damn happy living a simple life. I kept a $1500 belt I bought from Henry Bendels that's incredibly ugly as a reminder of dumb decisions and having too much money to piss away on stupid crap! Read Blood Diamonds: Tracing the Deadly Path of the World's Most Precious Stones Book by Greg Campbell. Reading that made me realize how our planet has finite resources and I just I wanted to cleave the my own consumption habits so stopped needless shopping for "fun" and started being a stubborn bastard about driving my 12 year old Hyundai into the ground. It's not much but it's my own private rebellion against the gaping maw of endless consumerism. Worship your family, friends, love ones, health, music, doing things that make you feel alive, shared experiences and nature over shiny toys and stuff that just sits around collecting dust and looking pretty. At the end of the day, we're all the same food for worms anyways no matter our net worth. Enjoy your friendships, realize they probably have their own internal struggles and problems they're dealing with and try to be there for them in whatever way you can!

compsciphd 5y ago
re your second paragraph. something almost all jewish children are taught (though not all really remember, keeping up with joneses exists even within religious communities https://www.sefaria.org.il/Pirkei_Avot.4.1?lang=bi https://www.sefaria.org.il/Pirkei_Avot.4.1?lang=bi "who is rich? one who is happy with their lot"
abledon 5y ago
Love it! If I could 'buy'(how ironic lol) your experience noted here I would, it seems like hard-engrained 'learned' knowledge that is hard to get through just reading.
wnolens 5y ago
Thanks for the story. I was in the hospital yesterday for unfortunate reasons and it stuck in my mind that working in healthcare is one of the few sectors that feels worth spending one's productive years in (to me).
- randycupertino 5y ago
  Well, one time I had a patient masturbate underneath his blanket and throw his semen in my eyes so it's not all sunshine and roses. After that I started wearing my glasses every day to work. We found back wayyyyy back in his chart like 250 pages deep "DO NOT LET PATIENT BE ATTENDED TO BY ANY FEMALE STAFF" that the other facility had deliberately obfuscated so that our place accept him! There's a lot of burnt out healthcare workers for sure, it's a hard job but I would say it's always interesting, you're always learning, there's lots of diversity and ways to specialize your career path (I went into oncology research) and it truly is rewarding. Just keep your head up for flying projectiles at your face :P Hope you're feeling better!
  - ntSean 5y ago
    Thanks for sticking to it! My mum is a nurse and so I’ve heard a lot of stories of this being common - as if being physically abused is a part of the job.
    - not2b 5y ago
      It's gotten really bad lately, with antivax covid patients and their family members assaulting doctors and nurses in hospitals. In some areas, health care workers are quitting in droves.
  - thakoppno 5y ago
    That is insane. What happened next? Does a patient get tossed for that? Are criminal charges brought? Did you test for any STI? Your perspective on life is fantastic. Cheers.
    - 5y ago
rl3 5y ago
>That billionaire was jealous of the main money dude who had family money inherited from the crusades. Illuminati confirmed. On a serious note, being born into wealth is a travesty of sorts. People who are tend to experience a reality that is far removed from that of the average person, and as such can't identify nor relate. They are robbed of a certain type of life. Yet, enormous wealth confers power that can be exercised over common people—despite such an upbringing rendering one ill-suited to exercise said power. It's a timeless problem, I suppose.
- ntSean 5y ago
  You’re exactly right- but it isn’t a timeless problem. Government has the ability to reform inheritance and taxation. However, theres no political will, because those with money, can lobby better than those without. Ironically America rejected the monarchy, and yet has replaced it with an oligarchy.
  - AnIdiotOnTheNet 5y ago
    They renamed 'aristocracy' to 'meritocracy' and we fell for it.
    - Mckckdk 5y ago
      The vast majority of billionaires and millionaires are self made.
      - AnIdiotOnTheNet 5y ago
        Define 'self made'. How many truly started out with no significant advantages conferred by the wealth of their progenitors?
        Mckckdk 5y ago
        Self made means they didn't inherit their millions/billions
deanmoriarty 5y ago
> Worship your family, friends, love ones, health, music, doing things that make you feel alive, shared experiences and nature over shiny toys and stuff that just sits around collecting dust and looking pretty. Agree but let’s not forget that money can give you wonderful experiences even if you are not materialistic, including the ability to not work anymore. Those are the people I am jealous of.
- pizza234 5y ago
  > including the ability to not work anymore I have two takes on this. The first is: I've met people who don't work. They're some of the most boring and wasteful people I've ever met. Lying down on a beach, or watching tv 12 hours a day (random cliches), get boring after some time. So one's going to look for something more meaningful and committed (in best case...), which brings to the second point: anything that's going to take a consistent share of one's like, inevitably becomes "work". Morale of the story: there is no freedom from work. But there's the option to pursue the work one likes :)
  - Sohcahtoa82 5y ago
    I keep saying that I can't wait to retire so that I'll have the time to work on some games I've been wanting to create. I haven't done them now because I don't want to spend my limited leisure time working, even if it's on something I want to create.
    - SpelingBeeChamp 5y ago
      If you are not doing it now, or making an effort to do it now, don't be surprised when the time comes and you discover that you are not spending your days as you expected. I retired for most of my twenties and early-thirties. It was all planned, and it ended up being one of the best decisions I have ever made, but it only created opportunity. Retirement doesn't change a person's interests or their motivation. When people receive a windfall of time, they tend to spend that time doing whatever it was they did prior, only more of it. If they watched TV in their free time, now they watch more TV. You get the idea. My unsolicited advice: do it now.
deleted 5y ago
[deleted]
cascom 5y ago
I've seen this myself as well and really can echo that it's all relative...funnily enough i think a lot of the OPs friends probably talk about material things because they're in just as much of a "keeping up with the joneses" mindset as well
hresvelgr 5y ago
> Worship your family, friends, love ones, health, music, doing things that make you feel alive Precisely this. Perhaps these friends continue to spend time with OP because they bring something enriching to their lives? I have some money and I don't look down on my friends who have less, but I also don't value it beyond being a tool. To me, money is a necessary evil and I'd rather do without. I value the richness of spirit in my friends.
HWR_14 5y ago
There is a difference between the hedonistic treadmill and having wealth. I knew people who made hundreds of thousands a year, and just banked it so they never have to work after they turn 29. Meanwhile, there's something condescending about talking to someone who is looking at being unable to accumulate enough wealth to do the things they want about how those things are meaningless.
- KennyBlanken 5y ago
  Yeah, and it also really goes to show how she just isn't in touch with reality for people who are _poor_. "Spend time with your friends", she says. OK, and then not be able to go out for drinks with your friends because you can't afford to eat out? Or because you're working a 12 hour shift because you need the overtime? Or studying trying to get marketable job skills? This discussion is full of rich, self-righteous assholes lecturing about how being wealthy isn't that great for this or that reason... Rich people don't have to worry about losing their job because their shitty 10 year old car is breaking down. They even can afford to buy cars that actually appreciate in value. Rich people can afford accountants to help them dodge the hell out of taxes, while poor people make mistakes on their tax forms and get slammed with extra taxes and fees. If someone rich loses their job, they likely have multiple kinds of savings, at least an emergency fund. What a novel concept- money you have just in case there's an emergency. They have plenty of people to network with and can find another job easily. Rich people don't have to worry about getting bent over if they need a loan. Rich people can buy durable housing, clothing, etc instead of shit that falls apart constantly. Rich people can afford healthy food, and have the time and energy to cook for themselves or at least get nutritious take-out, etc. I have slowly made a bunch of friends via an activity I'm able to do because of a family member. I was invited to an activity. That activity is going to cost $100+, not including the gas to get to/from the event. That is a sixth of my monthly budget. The guy organizing the event owns a "summer car" that costs $150,000.
  - jgwil2 5y ago
    What kind of car appreciates in value?
11101010001100 5y ago
> fought like cats and dogs with their families. I married into a wealthy family and I was not prepared for this. Its not easy keeping your head down.
finite_jest 5y ago
TBH, I think the "go from yuppie to hippie and it all becomes rainbows" is generally a false narrative. Money does often buy happiness. That "$75,000 a year is peak happiness" thesis does not replicate, like much of the social sciences. [1] I'm sure your new lifestyle is suitable for you and makes you happy. But I don't believe that's generalizable. [1]: https://archive.ph/20210127035328/https://www.vice.com/en/article/g5bm4b/money-actually-can-buy-happiness-study-says#selection-979.6-981.7 https://archive.ph/20210127035328/https://www.vice.com/en/ar...
stackbutterflow 5y ago
* That billionaire was jealous of the main money dude who had family money inherited from the crusades. * I wonder how you maintain wealth across centuries.
- eaenki 5y ago
  There’s research on this. Check Florence Italian study rich bla bla bla on google . But to answer: gold, land, art
Avalaxy 5y ago
I do not mean to shit on your post, because I liked it. But: > I left finance and went into healthcare and realized I'm pretty damn happy living a simple life If you made 300k per year before, how is that compatible with "living a simple life"? At that rate, with just a few years of working you can have saved up 1M in your bank account, which imho is nothing like 'living a simple life', even if you dont spend it.

compsciphd 5y ago

re your second paragraph. something almost all jewish children are taught (though not all really remember, keeping up with joneses exists even within religious communities https://www.sefaria.org.il/Pirkei_Avot.4.1?lang=bi https://www.sefaria.org.il/Pirkei_Avot.4.1?lang=bi "who is rich? one who is happy with their lot"

abledon 5y ago

Love it! If I could 'buy'(how ironic lol) your experience noted here I would, it seems like hard-engrained 'learned' knowledge that is hard to get through just reading.

wnolens 5y ago

Thanks for the story. I was in the hospital yesterday for unfortunate reasons and it stuck in my mind that working in healthcare is one of the few sectors that feels worth spending one's productive years in (to me).

randycupertino 5y ago
Well, one time I had a patient masturbate underneath his blanket and throw his semen in my eyes so it's not all sunshine and roses. After that I started wearing my glasses every day to work. We found back wayyyyy back in his chart like 250 pages deep "DO NOT LET PATIENT BE ATTENDED TO BY ANY FEMALE STAFF" that the other facility had deliberately obfuscated so that our place accept him! There's a lot of burnt out healthcare workers for sure, it's a hard job but I would say it's always interesting, you're always learning, there's lots of diversity and ways to specialize your career path (I went into oncology research) and it truly is rewarding. Just keep your head up for flying projectiles at your face :P Hope you're feeling better!
- ntSean 5y ago
  Thanks for sticking to it! My mum is a nurse and so I’ve heard a lot of stories of this being common - as if being physically abused is a part of the job.
  - not2b 5y ago
    It's gotten really bad lately, with antivax covid patients and their family members assaulting doctors and nurses in hospitals. In some areas, health care workers are quitting in droves.
- thakoppno 5y ago
  That is insane. What happened next? Does a patient get tossed for that? Are criminal charges brought? Did you test for any STI? Your perspective on life is fantastic. Cheers.
  - 5y ago

rl3 5y ago

>That billionaire was jealous of the main money dude who had family money inherited from the crusades. Illuminati confirmed. On a serious note, being born into wealth is a travesty of sorts. People who are tend to experience a reality that is far removed from that of the average person, and as such can't identify nor relate. They are robbed of a certain type of life. Yet, enormous wealth confers power that can be exercised over common people—despite such an upbringing rendering one ill-suited to exercise said power. It's a timeless problem, I suppose.

ntSean 5y ago
You’re exactly right- but it isn’t a timeless problem. Government has the ability to reform inheritance and taxation. However, theres no political will, because those with money, can lobby better than those without. Ironically America rejected the monarchy, and yet has replaced it with an oligarchy.
- AnIdiotOnTheNet 5y ago
  They renamed 'aristocracy' to 'meritocracy' and we fell for it.
  - Mckckdk 5y ago
    The vast majority of billionaires and millionaires are self made.
    - AnIdiotOnTheNet 5y ago
      Define 'self made'. How many truly started out with no significant advantages conferred by the wealth of their progenitors?
      - Mckckdk 5y ago
        Self made means they didn't inherit their millions/billions

deanmoriarty 5y ago

> Worship your family, friends, love ones, health, music, doing things that make you feel alive, shared experiences and nature over shiny toys and stuff that just sits around collecting dust and looking pretty. Agree but let’s not forget that money can give you wonderful experiences even if you are not materialistic, including the ability to not work anymore. Those are the people I am jealous of.

pizza234 5y ago
> including the ability to not work anymore I have two takes on this. The first is: I've met people who don't work. They're some of the most boring and wasteful people I've ever met. Lying down on a beach, or watching tv 12 hours a day (random cliches), get boring after some time. So one's going to look for something more meaningful and committed (in best case...), which brings to the second point: anything that's going to take a consistent share of one's like, inevitably becomes "work". Morale of the story: there is no freedom from work. But there's the option to pursue the work one likes :)
- Sohcahtoa82 5y ago
  I keep saying that I can't wait to retire so that I'll have the time to work on some games I've been wanting to create. I haven't done them now because I don't want to spend my limited leisure time working, even if it's on something I want to create.
  - SpelingBeeChamp 5y ago
    If you are not doing it now, or making an effort to do it now, don't be surprised when the time comes and you discover that you are not spending your days as you expected. I retired for most of my twenties and early-thirties. It was all planned, and it ended up being one of the best decisions I have ever made, but it only created opportunity. Retirement doesn't change a person's interests or their motivation. When people receive a windfall of time, they tend to spend that time doing whatever it was they did prior, only more of it. If they watched TV in their free time, now they watch more TV. You get the idea. My unsolicited advice: do it now.

deleted 5y ago

[deleted]

cascom 5y ago

I've seen this myself as well and really can echo that it's all relative...funnily enough i think a lot of the OPs friends probably talk about material things because they're in just as much of a "keeping up with the joneses" mindset as well

hresvelgr 5y ago

> Worship your family, friends, love ones, health, music, doing things that make you feel alive Precisely this. Perhaps these friends continue to spend time with OP because they bring something enriching to their lives? I have some money and I don't look down on my friends who have less, but I also don't value it beyond being a tool. To me, money is a necessary evil and I'd rather do without. I value the richness of spirit in my friends.

HWR_14 5y ago

There is a difference between the hedonistic treadmill and having wealth. I knew people who made hundreds of thousands a year, and just banked it so they never have to work after they turn 29. Meanwhile, there's something condescending about talking to someone who is looking at being unable to accumulate enough wealth to do the things they want about how those things are meaningless.

KennyBlanken 5y ago
Yeah, and it also really goes to show how she just isn't in touch with reality for people who are _poor_. "Spend time with your friends", she says. OK, and then not be able to go out for drinks with your friends because you can't afford to eat out? Or because you're working a 12 hour shift because you need the overtime? Or studying trying to get marketable job skills? This discussion is full of rich, self-righteous assholes lecturing about how being wealthy isn't that great for this or that reason... Rich people don't have to worry about losing their job because their shitty 10 year old car is breaking down. They even can afford to buy cars that actually appreciate in value. Rich people can afford accountants to help them dodge the hell out of taxes, while poor people make mistakes on their tax forms and get slammed with extra taxes and fees. If someone rich loses their job, they likely have multiple kinds of savings, at least an emergency fund. What a novel concept- money you have just in case there's an emergency. They have plenty of people to network with and can find another job easily. Rich people don't have to worry about getting bent over if they need a loan. Rich people can buy durable housing, clothing, etc instead of shit that falls apart constantly. Rich people can afford healthy food, and have the time and energy to cook for themselves or at least get nutritious take-out, etc. I have slowly made a bunch of friends via an activity I'm able to do because of a family member. I was invited to an activity. That activity is going to cost $100+, not including the gas to get to/from the event. That is a sixth of my monthly budget. The guy organizing the event owns a "summer car" that costs $150,000.
- jgwil2 5y ago
  What kind of car appreciates in value?

11101010001100 5y ago

> fought like cats and dogs with their families. I married into a wealthy family and I was not prepared for this. Its not easy keeping your head down.

finite_jest 5y ago

TBH, I think the "go from yuppie to hippie and it all becomes rainbows" is generally a false narrative. Money does often buy happiness. That "$75,000 a year is peak happiness" thesis does not replicate, like much of the social sciences. [1] I'm sure your new lifestyle is suitable for you and makes you happy. But I don't believe that's generalizable. [1]: https://archive.ph/20210127035328/https://www.vice.com/en/article/g5bm4b/money-actually-can-buy-happiness-study-says#selection-979.6-981.7 https://archive.ph/20210127035328/https://www.vice.com/en/ar...

stackbutterflow 5y ago

* That billionaire was jealous of the main money dude who had family money inherited from the crusades. * I wonder how you maintain wealth across centuries.

eaenki 5y ago
There’s research on this. Check Florence Italian study rich bla bla bla on google . But to answer: gold, land, art

Avalaxy 5y ago

I do not mean to shit on your post, because I liked it. But: > I left finance and went into healthcare and realized I'm pretty damn happy living a simple life If you made 300k per year before, how is that compatible with "living a simple life"? At that rate, with just a few years of working you can have saved up 1M in your bank account, which imho is nothing like 'living a simple life', even if you dont spend it.