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I don't know you, and I probably shouldn't comment, but this way of life stops people getting rich. For you I'm sure that's OK. Like you say, you have everythin

I don't know you, and I probably shouldn't comment, but this way of life stops people getting rich. For you I'm sure that's OK. Like you say, you have everything you need. Anyway... There are two things that practically every rich person I've met have in common (where rich is assets over about $100m that aren't inherited). The first is focus. They have the ability to see an idea through to the end. They believe in themselves, they believe in an idea, and they execute. By the sounds of it noduerme might have that sort of focus. To live frugally when you don't need to sounds like someone who has an idea and is sticking with it. That's awesome. The second thing is need. Actually needing money, either just to start out, or to fund a lavish lifestyle, or to keep up status, is a powerful driving force. Setting up your life up in a way that removes the force stops most people executing on their ideas. This is advice for anyone who wants to get rich - if you slowly grow your assets to a point where you're very comfortable, you probably won't ever level up to the point where you can buy a Lamborghini because you just won't need to. If your goal is to become rich most people don't seem to be able do it by slowly growing their wealth and then working on an idea. You have to use the need to be "%^&* you money" rich to drive your idea. (This isn't universal of course. Some people come up with an idea later in life after they've got a house and assets and still execute brilliantly. But it's much more common to see younger founders who need success pushing an idea to a big exit.)

activitypea 5y ago
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noduerme 5y ago
I upvoted because it's spot on. Those are exactly the drivers to get seriously rich. And you spotted me. I don't need to be rich or drive a lambo. Need for fuck-you money comes from a couple places, that I've seen: * Dad was abusive, always put you down. You never felt good enough, you need to prove you're better than him. I had this. My brothers had it. One of them makes $3M a year and desperately tries to use it to impress our father. I guess watching that act made me realize that's a fuckin futile way to spend your time. * You had some other form of humiliation, maybe you're short or ugly, girls don't give you the time of day. (I'm short and not terribly attractive - girls like me well enough if we get talking, and I always play poor on dates, although I pay for things. I never, ever want someone to like me more because.. [edit] double edit here. At my ultra-rich brother's wedding, his wife stood up to give a speech and she said: " I always thought [brother] was short, but I realized he was a lot taller when he was standing on his wallet! " Needless to say, they got divorced and he's still paying for it ). Just since we're speaking very bluntly. I found that when I'm single, I can usually meet a girl if I stick around somewhere until the end of the night. But I usually don't do that unless I'm starving. So you're exactly right, having the focus and having the need are two different things. The only place where I personally think you're wrong is your overall pitch - "don't be this guy [noduerme]" - to young fellas that think getting rich is the end-all. Like said, if I needed it enough, I'd spend my time trying to get fuck-you money and be rich by those standards. But proving the size of my dick just isn't something I need to do, know what I'm sayin? And funny enough, that blase attitude I've developed about it really fucking pisses off the ultra-rich people in my life.
- lordnacho 5y ago
  I've always found the real thing that people don't like, and I don't like, is the desire for approval. That childlike "look at me" thing that is endearing in a child but off-putting in an adult. I've seen it a few times among quite wealthy people, eg they try to impress you with how much wine they drink or how many cars they have, and it only works superficially. It's like a child somehow, and you often see them spouting their mundane thoughts in the media as if people want to hear what they think, or they start writing advice for other people to get rich. The thing about socializing is you discover that if someone has one of these hangups (women, money, intelligence) everyone around them will let them demonstrate it. It's painful to watch sometimes. "Sure I'll try your car one more time". "Wow you're really smart". By contrast I know genuinely megarich people who can't be identified as such, because they just don't have that need for approval.
  - noduerme 5y ago
    There is no one I feel sadder for than the ultra-rich people I know who desperately want to just be liked. They're stuck in that phase of pre-school where it's like, "Look at how many legos I have! Do you want to play with my toys?" This is so superficially obvious, when you see it, I mean... you have to feel pity, because they're so desperate for love. For any real connection. And they can't trust anyone, either, because they'll never believe someone actually likes them for who they are. Having more money than you need to live comfortably is a fucking curse.
    - irl_chad 5y ago
      You’re incredibly wrong. Rich people just make friends with other rich people. Speaking from experience, I don’t care if girls want me for my $. But I’m not looking for a wife right now. If I was, I would probably date women that I meet at higher social events instead of lingerie models. I have a couple friends from before I got rich, but most of my friends now have similar status.
      - noduerme 5y ago
vladvasiliu 5y ago
> The second thing is need. Actually needing money, either just to start out, or to fund a lavish lifestyle, or to keep up status, is a powerful driving force. Setting up your life up in a way that removes the force stops most people executing on their ideas. I think I see the reasoning for this, but empirically, I don't agree. The need may be necessary, but it's clearly not sufficient for many people. I would even say that it's just one of the possible means to get the focus going, but not the only one.
- noduerme 5y ago
  No one needs more rooms or roombas. I think he's referring to the need for 'respect' and ego gratification from other people. But rich people always find out this is bullshit - sometimes at the cost of years of being fake-handled by the people they trusted. Being rich can't buy you trust in your relationships. It's the opposite. You can never trust anyone who didn't love you when you were poor as hell.
ChrisMarshallNY 5y ago
It appears that you got downvoted a bit, and I’m sorry. I think that your point was well-made. In my case, I have written infrastructure software that has, and will, change the world. It has already become a worldwide standard, and is used daily, by thousands of people around the world. It is not hyperbole to say that the software saves lives. That’s exactly why I wrote it. I never made a dime on it. In fact, I spent thousands of dollars of my own money, and ten years of my life, shepherding it to the point where it could be taken over by a new team, and become ubiquitous. It was a difficult journey. The demographics of the users of my software are … challenging. I often weathered torrents of abuse, sabotage, and opposition, during the project. The new team will never have to suffer those particular slings and arrows. I’m an ornery, stubborn old coot, and could take it. I knew what I was signing up for, and many folks would consider me insane for doing it (they may have a point). I’ll never get an award, and I have almost no recognition at all. Every day, I interact with people that use my software, and have no idea that I was the original author. I also deal with folks that know what I did, but don’t really understand what it took to get where we are. They seem to think that I sat down, and churned it out in a couple of months. Not every achievement should be measured in money, and that’s great.
irl_chad 5y ago
After tax I make a few hundred k/month. I spend almost all of it. I’m always motivated to keep growing my business, because if I don’t, I’ll go broke. I love this lifestyle.
- HWR_14 5y ago
  I have no idea how you can spend a few hundred thousand dollars a month while still working hard enough to maintain a high growth rate, which I assume is at least full time. I also cannot fathom making that much (or really any solid amount of money) and spending it all. Why no t put a solid chunk away in case your business goes belly up and you want to retire to a beach?
- helpful_hopeful 5y ago
  Any chance I could pick your brain on how I would start my own business and make it successful?

activitypea 5y ago

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noduerme 5y ago

I upvoted because it's spot on. Those are exactly the drivers to get seriously rich. And you spotted me. I don't need to be rich or drive a lambo. Need for fuck-you money comes from a couple places, that I've seen: * Dad was abusive, always put you down. You never felt good enough, you need to prove you're better than him. I had this. My brothers had it. One of them makes $3M a year and desperately tries to use it to impress our father. I guess watching that act made me realize that's a fuckin futile way to spend your time. * You had some other form of humiliation, maybe you're short or ugly, girls don't give you the time of day. (I'm short and not terribly attractive - girls like me well enough if we get talking, and I always play poor on dates, although I pay for things. I never, ever want someone to like me more because.. [edit] double edit here. At my ultra-rich brother's wedding, his wife stood up to give a speech and she said: " I always thought [brother] was short, but I realized he was a lot taller when he was standing on his wallet! " Needless to say, they got divorced and he's still paying for it ). Just since we're speaking very bluntly. I found that when I'm single, I can usually meet a girl if I stick around somewhere until the end of the night. But I usually don't do that unless I'm starving. So you're exactly right, having the focus and having the need are two different things. The only place where I personally think you're wrong is your overall pitch - "don't be this guy [noduerme]" - to young fellas that think getting rich is the end-all. Like said, if I needed it enough, I'd spend my time trying to get fuck-you money and be rich by those standards. But proving the size of my dick just isn't something I need to do, know what I'm sayin? And funny enough, that blase attitude I've developed about it really fucking pisses off the ultra-rich people in my life.

lordnacho 5y ago
I've always found the real thing that people don't like, and I don't like, is the desire for approval. That childlike "look at me" thing that is endearing in a child but off-putting in an adult. I've seen it a few times among quite wealthy people, eg they try to impress you with how much wine they drink or how many cars they have, and it only works superficially. It's like a child somehow, and you often see them spouting their mundane thoughts in the media as if people want to hear what they think, or they start writing advice for other people to get rich. The thing about socializing is you discover that if someone has one of these hangups (women, money, intelligence) everyone around them will let them demonstrate it. It's painful to watch sometimes. "Sure I'll try your car one more time". "Wow you're really smart". By contrast I know genuinely megarich people who can't be identified as such, because they just don't have that need for approval.
- noduerme 5y ago
  There is no one I feel sadder for than the ultra-rich people I know who desperately want to just be liked. They're stuck in that phase of pre-school where it's like, "Look at how many legos I have! Do you want to play with my toys?" This is so superficially obvious, when you see it, I mean... you have to feel pity, because they're so desperate for love. For any real connection. And they can't trust anyone, either, because they'll never believe someone actually likes them for who they are. Having more money than you need to live comfortably is a fucking curse.
  - irl_chad 5y ago
    You’re incredibly wrong. Rich people just make friends with other rich people. Speaking from experience, I don’t care if girls want me for my $. But I’m not looking for a wife right now. If I was, I would probably date women that I meet at higher social events instead of lingerie models. I have a couple friends from before I got rich, but most of my friends now have similar status.
    - noduerme 5y ago

vladvasiliu 5y ago

> The second thing is need. Actually needing money, either just to start out, or to fund a lavish lifestyle, or to keep up status, is a powerful driving force. Setting up your life up in a way that removes the force stops most people executing on their ideas. I think I see the reasoning for this, but empirically, I don't agree. The need may be necessary, but it's clearly not sufficient for many people. I would even say that it's just one of the possible means to get the focus going, but not the only one.

noduerme 5y ago
No one needs more rooms or roombas. I think he's referring to the need for 'respect' and ego gratification from other people. But rich people always find out this is bullshit - sometimes at the cost of years of being fake-handled by the people they trusted. Being rich can't buy you trust in your relationships. It's the opposite. You can never trust anyone who didn't love you when you were poor as hell.

ChrisMarshallNY 5y ago

It appears that you got downvoted a bit, and I’m sorry. I think that your point was well-made. In my case, I have written infrastructure software that has, and will, change the world. It has already become a worldwide standard, and is used daily, by thousands of people around the world. It is not hyperbole to say that the software saves lives. That’s exactly why I wrote it. I never made a dime on it. In fact, I spent thousands of dollars of my own money, and ten years of my life, shepherding it to the point where it could be taken over by a new team, and become ubiquitous. It was a difficult journey. The demographics of the users of my software are … challenging. I often weathered torrents of abuse, sabotage, and opposition, during the project. The new team will never have to suffer those particular slings and arrows. I’m an ornery, stubborn old coot, and could take it. I knew what I was signing up for, and many folks would consider me insane for doing it (they may have a point). I’ll never get an award, and I have almost no recognition at all. Every day, I interact with people that use my software, and have no idea that I was the original author. I also deal with folks that know what I did, but don’t really understand what it took to get where we are. They seem to think that I sat down, and churned it out in a couple of months. Not every achievement should be measured in money, and that’s great.

irl_chad 5y ago

After tax I make a few hundred k/month. I spend almost all of it. I’m always motivated to keep growing my business, because if I don’t, I’ll go broke. I love this lifestyle.

HWR_14 5y ago
I have no idea how you can spend a few hundred thousand dollars a month while still working hard enough to maintain a high growth rate, which I assume is at least full time. I also cannot fathom making that much (or really any solid amount of money) and spending it all. Why no t put a solid chunk away in case your business goes belly up and you want to retire to a beach?
helpful_hopeful 5y ago
Any chance I could pick your brain on how I would start my own business and make it successful?