8 ms·

It has always been like that on Tinder. My phone number can't create a new account for example (never receive the confirmation code). That's called shadowban in

by polote 5y ago

It has always been like that on Tinder. My phone number can't create a new account for example (never receive the confirmation code). That's called shadowban in the case of OP. Bumble started doing the same practices a year ago (which makes sense as they have the same founder) But they are not 100% wrong, Tinder is not here to make people meet each other. They are here to make money and people don't pay because they get more matches, they pay because they are frustrated. Tinder needs a way to keep girls active on the platform, and for that to works they have to prevent boys to have a negative behavior. That's why they shadowban guys easily, as soon as they detect non standard behavior they shadowban, people keep seeing profile and keep paying. Girls don't see those profiles and have a better experience overall and stays longer, which makes guys stays longer because FOMO of matching the one. This has nothing to do with Big tech. If you want to meet people don't use Tinder, that used to work well in the past, it very rarely works now. EDIT: And FYI if you want to exit shadowban on Tinder, it is pretty well documented on r/SwipeHelper, you need to change: phone, phone number, Facebook account, Credit card, pictures and don't login from the same IP

sbst32 5y ago
>> That's called shadowban in the case of OP. Bumble started doing the same practices a year ago (which makes sense as they have the same founder) Not arguing with the point you're making, but Bumble and Tinder founders are definitely not the same.
- polote 5y ago
  The founder of Bumble is one of the founders of Tinder. But others founders of Tinder are not founders of Bumble, this is true. Also we could argue that Bumble has two founders, but this is insignificant anyway
  - Narretz 5y ago
    Maybe they confused Bumble with all the other apps / services that are under the Match branch: Tinder, Match.com, plentyoffish, OkCupid ...
wayoutthere 5y ago
As a woman, Tinder is fine if you wanna find a fuck buddy and don’t take it seriously. I see a lot of people (men and women) get wrapped up in the swipe game and that’s really not how it works. You can’t take anything that happens on that platform personally. Unfortunately, rule #1 on tinder is “be physically attractive”. If you want tinder to work for you consistently as a man, get your personal hygiene in order and hit the gym. That’s the main reason I swipe left; well, that and conservative politics.
- whimsicalism 5y ago
  Rule #1 *for a man. That's just how the dating market is :)
- polote 5y ago
  > rule #1 on tinder is “be physically attractive” For guys it used to be right, now rule #1 is more "be super attractive" or "be attractive and don't have standard" For girls rule #1 is "be a girl"
  - sebastianconcpt 5y ago
    [flagged]
    - sebastianconcpt 5y ago
      It's funny how raw red pill truths get downvoted here. Some seem to prefer to send technical brutal honesty about the current state of sexual market under the rug.
      - ProjectArcturis 5y ago
        It could be the app, or it could be that women can easily smell the scent of desperation, entitlement, and resentment wafting off of you.
        5y ago
jhgb 5y ago
> as soon as they detect non standard behavior they shadowban, people keep seeing profile and keep paying That's called "fraud" in most countries. If you believe that fraud is "not 100% wrong" then I don't know what to say to that.
- polote 5y ago
  I was saying it is not 100% wrong to ban people. The fact that the banned people are still paying and dont get their money back clearly look like fraud (even if this is more complex, as Tinder is very smart about how they communicate, they never make you pay to get matches, they make you pay to be able to like more). But yeah Match group is a fraud company, I've wrote some posts on the topic in the past
Sosh101 5y ago
> This has nothing to do with Big tech. If you want to meet people don't use Tinder, that used to work well in the past, it very rarely works now. EDIT: It seems I misunderstood this statement. I read it as "If you want to meet people don't use Tinder, [not using twitter] used to work well in the past, it very rarely works now" I don't understand your reasoning here. You're suggesting that tinder is a vital service for some aspect of life now(I agree, unfortunately), but also saying it's not a problem with big tech? This kind of thing is exactly why big tech needs to be regulated.
- polote 5y ago
  Is Bumble big tech ? No, still they have the same tactics than Tinder. I'm not saying there is no problem (I have wrote several article criticizing Match group and the app dating market), I'm just saying this has nothing to do with big Tech. Any dating app (and some do) can do the same as Tinder
  - Sosh101 5y ago
    I'm not familiar with Bumble (I've never used Tinder either). My point is if you are controlling access to "the market" then a user being excluded could be a real disadvantage, and should be treated with care.
- tejohnso 5y ago
  > You're suggesting that tinder is a vital service for some aspect of life now(I agree, unfortunately) Tinder being a "vital service" sounds absurd.
  - Sosh101 5y ago
    They stated " If you want to meet people don't use Tinder, that used to work well in the past, it very rarely works now.", which if I understand them correctly means that it's hard to meet people without it. Perhaps you don't need to meet anyone, but for someone who does I don't think it's that absurd.
throwawayacc2 5y ago
> That's called shadowban in the case of OP. I’d call that fraud. If you pay for a service you get to use the service.
- pas 5y ago
  Does their ToS say they can terminate it without notice?
  - _fat_santa 5y ago
    Terminating without notice is one thing. Shadowbanning and continuing to take your money is a completely different thing.
- JohnHaugeland 5y ago
  No, banning someone from a paid service is not fraud.
  - jimnotgym 5y ago
    It is if you keep taking their money and pretend that they are not banned.
  - throwawayacc2 5y ago
    Banning + refund for the remainder credit, sure. Scummy, but sure. Shadow banning, taking peoples money while they still think they get a service, not even banning at the end of the billing cycle, without giving notice, nah, that’s definitely fraud.
  - stjohnswarts 5y ago
    It is if they silo you off without notifying you and make sure no one else can see you and keep taking your money. Now I don't know if tender is doing that provably, but that was the thesis.
  - ska 5y ago
    Colloquially and technically "ban" and "shadowban" are different things; I have no idea what happened in OP case but "shadowban" means that you leave someone in a system but silently block all of their interactions. e.g. ban: you try to log into HN and it gives you a message: "You can't log in, you are banned" shadowban: you log in to HN with your account, you post comments and vote on stories but unknown to you nobody else on HN can see this. Eventually you start to wonder why you never get replies anymore. It's definitely an ethical issue if you are doing the latter without telling someone, and additionally charging them for the service you aren't providing. With a dating app it might be hard to tell for a while; how are you to know that you aren't getting any replies/engagement because of the way such sites work, or because the people you contacted never saw the likes/messages/whatever.
croes 5y ago
Will be interesting when they all switch to biometric login. "Hey Doc, I need a new face." "Mafia? Witness protection?" "Tinder."
jokoon 5y ago
I know a woman who got banned on two apps, including tinder.
- akimball 5y ago
  That’s hot
zionic 5y ago
>This has nothing to do with Big tech. If you want to meet people don't use Tinder, As I said in my comment up-post, Tinder has a near-absolute monopoly in my area. If you're not on Tinder you basically don't exist on the local dating market. Yes, the future sucks.
- VRay 5y ago
  OK, I've been married for a long time and never had any luck with any dating service before that, but I don't think that's necessarily as true as you think You're within 2-3 degrees of separation of dozens or hundreds of single people you can date, so if you just start putting the word out among your friends, family, etc I think they'll start introducing you to people
- aenis 5y ago
  Ugh. This sucks. I cant imagine deciding to date or even meet someone whom I only know by their app profile. Glad my dating days are over.
- ShrigmaMale 5y ago
  "Sorry, you're shadowbanned, guess you'll die alone. The Algorithm has spoken." Its damn kafkaesque.

by polote 5y ago

sbst32 5y ago

>> That's called shadowban in the case of OP. Bumble started doing the same practices a year ago (which makes sense as they have the same founder) Not arguing with the point you're making, but Bumble and Tinder founders are definitely not the same.

polote 5y ago
The founder of Bumble is one of the founders of Tinder. But others founders of Tinder are not founders of Bumble, this is true. Also we could argue that Bumble has two founders, but this is insignificant anyway
- Narretz 5y ago
  Maybe they confused Bumble with all the other apps / services that are under the Match branch: Tinder, Match.com, plentyoffish, OkCupid ...

wayoutthere 5y ago

As a woman, Tinder is fine if you wanna find a fuck buddy and don’t take it seriously. I see a lot of people (men and women) get wrapped up in the swipe game and that’s really not how it works. You can’t take anything that happens on that platform personally. Unfortunately, rule #1 on tinder is “be physically attractive”. If you want tinder to work for you consistently as a man, get your personal hygiene in order and hit the gym. That’s the main reason I swipe left; well, that and conservative politics.

whimsicalism 5y ago
Rule #1 *for a man. That's just how the dating market is :)
polote 5y ago
> rule #1 on tinder is “be physically attractive” For guys it used to be right, now rule #1 is more "be super attractive" or "be attractive and don't have standard" For girls rule #1 is "be a girl"
- sebastianconcpt 5y ago
  [flagged]
  - sebastianconcpt 5y ago
    It's funny how raw red pill truths get downvoted here. Some seem to prefer to send technical brutal honesty about the current state of sexual market under the rug.
    - ProjectArcturis 5y ago
      It could be the app, or it could be that women can easily smell the scent of desperation, entitlement, and resentment wafting off of you.
      - 5y ago

jhgb 5y ago

> as soon as they detect non standard behavior they shadowban, people keep seeing profile and keep paying That's called "fraud" in most countries. If you believe that fraud is "not 100% wrong" then I don't know what to say to that.

polote 5y ago
I was saying it is not 100% wrong to ban people. The fact that the banned people are still paying and dont get their money back clearly look like fraud (even if this is more complex, as Tinder is very smart about how they communicate, they never make you pay to get matches, they make you pay to be able to like more). But yeah Match group is a fraud company, I've wrote some posts on the topic in the past

Sosh101 5y ago

> This has nothing to do with Big tech. If you want to meet people don't use Tinder, that used to work well in the past, it very rarely works now. EDIT: It seems I misunderstood this statement. I read it as "If you want to meet people don't use Tinder, [not using twitter] used to work well in the past, it very rarely works now" I don't understand your reasoning here. You're suggesting that tinder is a vital service for some aspect of life now(I agree, unfortunately), but also saying it's not a problem with big tech? This kind of thing is exactly why big tech needs to be regulated.

polote 5y ago
Is Bumble big tech ? No, still they have the same tactics than Tinder. I'm not saying there is no problem (I have wrote several article criticizing Match group and the app dating market), I'm just saying this has nothing to do with big Tech. Any dating app (and some do) can do the same as Tinder
- Sosh101 5y ago
  I'm not familiar with Bumble (I've never used Tinder either). My point is if you are controlling access to "the market" then a user being excluded could be a real disadvantage, and should be treated with care.
tejohnso 5y ago
> You're suggesting that tinder is a vital service for some aspect of life now(I agree, unfortunately) Tinder being a "vital service" sounds absurd.
- Sosh101 5y ago
  They stated " If you want to meet people don't use Tinder, that used to work well in the past, it very rarely works now.", which if I understand them correctly means that it's hard to meet people without it. Perhaps you don't need to meet anyone, but for someone who does I don't think it's that absurd.

throwawayacc2 5y ago

> That's called shadowban in the case of OP. I’d call that fraud. If you pay for a service you get to use the service.

pas 5y ago
Does their ToS say they can terminate it without notice?
- _fat_santa 5y ago
  Terminating without notice is one thing. Shadowbanning and continuing to take your money is a completely different thing.
JohnHaugeland 5y ago
No, banning someone from a paid service is not fraud.
- jimnotgym 5y ago
  It is if you keep taking their money and pretend that they are not banned.
- throwawayacc2 5y ago
  Banning + refund for the remainder credit, sure. Scummy, but sure. Shadow banning, taking peoples money while they still think they get a service, not even banning at the end of the billing cycle, without giving notice, nah, that’s definitely fraud.
- stjohnswarts 5y ago
  It is if they silo you off without notifying you and make sure no one else can see you and keep taking your money. Now I don't know if tender is doing that provably, but that was the thesis.
- ska 5y ago
  Colloquially and technically "ban" and "shadowban" are different things; I have no idea what happened in OP case but "shadowban" means that you leave someone in a system but silently block all of their interactions. e.g. ban: you try to log into HN and it gives you a message: "You can't log in, you are banned" shadowban: you log in to HN with your account, you post comments and vote on stories but unknown to you nobody else on HN can see this. Eventually you start to wonder why you never get replies anymore. It's definitely an ethical issue if you are doing the latter without telling someone, and additionally charging them for the service you aren't providing. With a dating app it might be hard to tell for a while; how are you to know that you aren't getting any replies/engagement because of the way such sites work, or because the people you contacted never saw the likes/messages/whatever.

croes 5y ago

Will be interesting when they all switch to biometric login. "Hey Doc, I need a new face." "Mafia? Witness protection?" "Tinder."

jokoon 5y ago

I know a woman who got banned on two apps, including tinder.

akimball 5y ago
That’s hot

zionic 5y ago

>This has nothing to do with Big tech. If you want to meet people don't use Tinder, As I said in my comment up-post, Tinder has a near-absolute monopoly in my area. If you're not on Tinder you basically don't exist on the local dating market. Yes, the future sucks.

VRay 5y ago
OK, I've been married for a long time and never had any luck with any dating service before that, but I don't think that's necessarily as true as you think You're within 2-3 degrees of separation of dozens or hundreds of single people you can date, so if you just start putting the word out among your friends, family, etc I think they'll start introducing you to people
aenis 5y ago
Ugh. This sucks. I cant imagine deciding to date or even meet someone whom I only know by their app profile. Glad my dating days are over.
ShrigmaMale 5y ago
"Sorry, you're shadowbanned, guess you'll die alone. The Algorithm has spoken." Its damn kafkaesque.